The Loves of a Slayer
by RainyDaySunlight
Summary: Please read and review! Buffy finally begins what it means to love when she sees it forming between her new slayer protoge and the most unlikely candidate: Spike. Can she finally settle in her own lovelife while keeping the new slayer out of trouble
1. Chapter One

**Summary**: Joy Peters is a teenager with strange powers. What she doesn't know _yet_ is that she is actually the new slayer. Well...after a tragedy strikes her home, Joy is relocated to none other than the infamous Sunnydale, CA where she, rather reluctantly, joins the Scooby Gang. Life is tough fitting in to a new school, making new friends, and oh yea...falling for a familiar bleached-blonde Vampire who's so desperate to prove himself good! Giles has trouble keeping the new slayer concentrated on her training and Buffy has trouble keeping the new slayer away from Spike. There will be action, adventure, romance, drama, angst, humor, and horror (at least I'll try to include all of them).  
The setup for the series is as follows (I hope it's not too confusing. I'm just kind of molding everything to how I want it, or need it I guess. If you're confused about anything then just ask me.)...The town's as it is in the end of season 6, but with the new school and principal (it is not Principal Woods, but someone sort of like him without the whole "Spike killed my mom" drama). Warren's gang is over (they bothered me), and Tara was never killed and Willow doesn't go bad; she and Willow are happily still in love and they're both in college, living with Buffy. Angel is in LA but his crew has recently broken up, and now he's been given a new mission by the Powers: prepare the new slayer. He never had a son. Spike and Buffy had their sexual tryst (which is what they both agreed it was) and they are long past over. Spike never got his soul, and he is still tamed by the chip in his head. After Xander's and Anya's failed engagement, they are still experiencing feelings, but are unsure as to what those feelings are. Faith ran off to LA where she got herself in some serious trouble and has been arrested more times than she can count. There is not going to be any 'potentials' or end of Sunnydale. And Giles has been in England but has just returned with some news about a new slayer, which he has been given orders to find and to train. Oh yea, and guess who comes back to Buffy? Riley Finn (and he's very unmarried). However, it's not all champagne and roses when Angel joins them and her old feelings resurface.  
So, there it is in a nutshell. I know it's not at all right with the series, but that's why it's a fanfiction. It's my own little made up story of how I think it would be fun. Please, all I'm asking is that you give it a chance. Thanks!

Chapter One: In Trouble Again

High school. What good could be said about it? The halls were always filled with enemy jabbing and gossiping. The classes were dull and useless. The food was probably poisonous. The girls were much too competitive for their age. And the guys were well...anything but stimulating. But that was life.

"Take it back!" A girl's angry voice rang out across the schoolyard signaling the first fight of the year. Her demand was followed by a forceful punch.

"No!" Her female opponent's rather-frightened voice replied with an attempt at equal vigor.

"Don't be an idiot Kelly!" Some random onlooker begged the weaker fighter to reconsider her smug tenacity.

"Listen to your friends, Kelly! They're smarter than you and their looking out for your own good!" The first voice threatened again and again followed her words with a hard attack.

The fighting opponent, Kelly, wouldn't listen to reason and so kept up the fight.

If an unaware passerby happened to walk across the front lawn catfight, they might think the battle looked evenly matched. The two girls were of about the same stature, both small in size, petite and a little on the shorter side. However, if another passerby who knew more about the two students happened to walk by, they would have more understanding as to the serious threat Kelly was facing. Joy Peters was an excellent fighter, no matter her small size.

In another minute Kelly was face down on the ground, her perfect, white cheerleading skirt covered instantly with unflattering streaks of grass and dirt. But she was not safe yet. Her fighting partner pounced on her, taking advantage of Kelly's on-the-ground position. Grabbing her by the hair, Joy pushed Kelly's face into the ground forcing her to literally eat dirt. Pulling her head backwards, Joy screamed again.

"Take it back bitch!" Joy was repetitively shoving the cheerleader's face into the ground making her groan in pain.

"Get off me you freak!" Kelly flailed her arms in vain in an attempt to throw her attacker off of her back where Joy was mounted.

"Take it ba-" Joy was suddenly pulled by her arm off of the helpless brunette who was being smothered by the grass. Joy tried to wriggle free but more strong hands came to hold her back and when she turned around she realized that one of the people holding her was a teacher.

"Miss Peters," The teacher's stern face turned into an even more serious frown. "I should have known."

"Oh Mr. Hawkins, thank God you came!" Kelly crawled to her feet with the help of a friend. "She's gone mental, I swear! If you hadn't shown up there's no telling what she would have done. She's a lunatic, Mr. Hawkins! She just started attacking me like a monster, honest, I have witnesses!" Her whiny voice droned on as she glanced to her friend for backup, who nodded obediently; the 'friend' seemed too afraid to cross the enraged cheerleader. Kelly continued, "She really should be locked up, Mr. Hawkins, she's not fit to be in a school an-"

"That will do Miss Lyle." Mr. Hawkins, the teacher holding Joy, rolled his eyes at the desperate girl who was furiously wiping at the stains on her outfit and trying to smooth out her mangled raven locks. "Miss Peters, come with me."

Joy followed, though not without some reluctance and a few shouted insults back at Kelly. A few minutes later she was slouching in a stiff, wood chair staring blankly across a large desk at the principal. No one had spoken yet but the disapproving frown on Principal Nelson's face was more than words.

"Look, I know what you're thinking," Joy rolled her eyes and spoke bluntly to the principal. She was obviously in no way shy of speaking to authority figures.

"What am I thinking, Miss Peters?" Principal Nelson entwined his fingers and rested his hands on his desk. "Please, amuse me."

"You're thinking what a screw up I am and how you're so disappointed in me-" She started her explanation.

"Alright, let's stop you right there." Principal Nelson leaned forward. "Miss Peters, you are a good student, at least you are when you try. I just don't feel that you really apply yourself to your schoolwork. At least that's how your last year was. I felt that last year you had some potential but you never...what's the word...utilized that potential. Don't let this year turn out the same, Miss Peters." He shook his head. "Don't let your high school years be wasted."

Joy shrugged carelessly, "I guess we'll see how it goes!" She shifted in her seat. "Is that all?"

"No, that's not all! That was just a sidetrack subject." Principal Nelson leaned back in his seat again. "Miss Peters, you know why you're here."

"Yea, I know. I was fighting," Joy crossed her arms over her chest. "And fighting's against school policy, ya-da-ya-da," Joy was also not very good at respecting authority, or rules.

"The school year's hardly even begun! I would really rather not expel you after only ten days of classes!" The principal sighed deeply. "I had hoped that you would outgrow your...uh...anger, over the summer."

"Anger?" Joy laughed. "I don't have an anger problem, well maybe a little of a temper problem. But you know what? You are so not going to put all this blame on me!" Joy's voice rose in vehemence. "This fight was not one-sided!"

"Miss Peters," The principal shook his head. "Do you really expect me to believe that Miss Kelly Lyle would start a fight?"

"Well, it's not fair that you automatically accuse me! Just because I'm not little-miss-perfect-head-cheerleader-have-my-own-posse-and-paid-for-boobs..."

"Miss Peters, I really don't think that's appropriate!" Principal Nelson almost laughed at Joy's comment but didn't for modesty sake.

"I'm not done," Joy cut off the principal and he raised an eyebrow and didn't let her finish her thought.

"Yes you are done, Miss Peters," He cleared his throat. "Now, with your record, it's not such an impossible idea for me to assume you started this afternoon's dispute."

"She deserved it!"

"Miss Peters," His voice held warning.

"She said I was a bitchy whore and that my boyfriend was a foreign delinquent!" Joy's voice rose again, cutting off the principal with no restraint. "Now, I may not be the most, umm, virtuous girl in school, but I don't sleep around! I would never cheat on Henri, he and I are very serious! He trusts me. Just because I choose to be a little on the flirtatious side-"

"Miss Peters, I really don't think that this is a fitting conversation for us to be having," Principal Nelson seemed uneasy and he fidgeted as his cheeks blushed.

"Look Principal Nelson, I am just not that kind of girl! Kelly had no right to say that about me!" She was enraged and the principal couldn't calm her.

"I agree," He spoke when she finally silenced, "She should not have spoke about you so harshly, but Miss Peters...you broke her nose!"

Joy shrugged and carelessly turned her attention to the fingernail-rip in her fishnet shirt, "So, she'll buy a new one!"

He frowned, "It wasn't fair of you to hurt her though."

Joy sighed resignedly, "Whatever, give me detention and get over it. I'm going to be late for work," She stood and prepared to leave the office.

"I'm afraid I can't let you off that easily this time," He glanced towards the doorway and she turned around slowly, not sure what he was looking at. She grimaced. It was her parents.

"Shit," She muttered under her breath and slunk back into the chair.

Aah, high school. What a vicious and wonderful life.


	2. Chapter Two

Chapter Two: The Exhaustion of a Slayer

"Have I," _Punch. _"Ever," _Kick. _"Mentioned," _Duck. _"How much," _Jump kick. _"I hate," _Stake. _"Vampires!" _Dust. _

It was another eventful evening on patrol. Buffy Summers dropped onto the soft dirt of a fresh grave; her chest heaved in exhaustion. With a pout she analyzed her white, suede jacket.

"The jerk made me get my new jacket dirty!" She removed the jacket and tried to rub away the traces of the filth. "Wil, it's not fair! Why can't I save the world and stay clean while doing it? Like Wonder Woman!"

Buffy's redheaded friend smiled, "Buffy, Wonder Woman's not real!"

"How do you know?" Buffy questioned teasingly.

Willow Rosenberg shrugged and then responded with a completely reasonable voice. "Her boobs are unnaturally huge. She couldn't be real."

"Oh, well at least you have a solid theory." Buffy laughed at her friend's answer.

"Hey," Willow pointed to the mound of dirt that Buffy was sitting on, "Rising vamp alert!"

Buffy looked behind her and noticed a pale, bony arm reaching out of the earth. "Here we go again." She cast aside her spoiled coat and as the vampire emerged from the ground she began the short battle. When she had finished the fight, turning the vampire into a pile of dust, she sighed. "At least they're dumb when their new."

Willow smiled. "Aren't the undead always dumb?"

Buffy nodded, "Yea, I guess." She glanced around the moonlit graveyard. "I think that's good for tonight, and I'm tired. Let's go."

"Buffy," Willow picked up her friend's discarded jacket and left the graveyard obligingly beside the young blonde, but hesitated to ask the slayer a question that had been bugging her mind lately. "How're you feeling?"

"Huh?" Buffy was scrutinizing a new gash on her forearm. "Oh fine, it's just a scratch!" She winked at her caring friend.

Willow shook her head, "No, I'm not talking about your arm." She had slowed without realizing it and had to take an extra couple of steps to catch up to Buffy's long strides. "I mean in general. How are you feeling?"

"You've got to be more specific, Wil," Buffy took her jacket from the redhead and draped it over her shoulders casually.

"Don't get me wrong, I mean I'm the biggest fan of the slayer and all your slayer strength, but lately...you seem worn out Buffy," Willow's big, brown eyes reflected her sincerity.

Buffy tried to shrug away her friend's concern. "Willow, I'm fine. I've got some stuff on my mind, nothing serious though," She sighed deeply and Willow dropped the conversation but her worries never left her concerned redheaded mind.

The weekend started relatively slow and boring. Buffy had been out late on patrol, as usual, and since she still hadn't gotten a daytime job (like her friends had been telling her to), she had been able to sleep in late in the morning. Her sister, Dawn, also chose to sleep in after having been out late Friday night with friends, more specifically her new boy interest: Colin Brown. The last two members of the household, Willow and her girlfriend Tara Maclay were up as usual, way too early for a Saturday, and were making pancakes in the kitchen. Both were powerful with magic, though Willow more so, and were equally talented in the kitchen.

"Good morning, sleepyhead," Willow grinned at Buffy as she lazily slipped down the stairs and joined the two witches in the kitchen.

"God, why are you up so early, and cooking? Freaks!" Buffy grumpily poured herself a cup of coffee.

Willow's peppy mood could not be deflated by her friend's bad, morning attitude. "Ah, come on, have some fluffy, yummy batter for your hungry tummy." She plopped a plate piled high with pancakes in front of Buffy's counter stool.

Tara smiled at her girlfriend's cuteness and brought the syrup over to Buffy. "Hard patrol last night?" she asked caringly.

Buffy shrugged, "Yea, well, no more than usual I guess." Her answer was curt, surely unintentionally, but her snappiness still made Tara pull back in surprise.

Willow's unease resurfaced with Buffy's unusually sour mood. A bad mood was very odd for the usually peppy and happy blonde slayer and she was only rarely short-tempered when something gave her reason to be.

"You need a vacation." Willow decided, pouring more batter into the pan on the stove.

"A vacation would be nice," Buffy sighed wistfully. "A boyfriend would be nice too. Maybe I could get both together!"

"Do you have anyone in mind?" Tara asked.

"Huh?" Buffy had mostly been just rambling. She hadn't actually expected anyone to pick up on her statement. As much as Buffy loved her two, dear friends, she didn't really want to discuss with them the matter of not having a boyfriend when they were in constant perfect love-bliss. Luckily, that conversation was halted as Dawn bounded into the kitchen.

"I thought I smelled pancakes!" She hugged each person in turn and then took a seat next to Buffy.

"Hey Dawnie, Tara's working with Anya today," Willow was referring to the Magic Shop, the store filled with magic supplies, which their friend, Anya, managed when the original owner, Giles, was gone; which was often lately. "So, I was thinking we could have that girl day we've been talking about for so long!"

"For real? Yay!" Dawn clapped her hands in glee. "I'll go get ready right now!" She started to stand.

"Dawn, I think Wil is thinking about after breakfast." Buffy laughed at her excited sister. Willow nodded.

"Oh, okay, then I'll eat first, because my stomach's rumbling." Dawn settled back into her chair and gratefully accepted the plate of pancakes that Tara handed her. "Ooh, could we maybe go shopping for a swimsuit?" Dawn suddenly asked.

"Why do you need swimsuit?" Buffy looked at her sister.

Tara answered for her, "D-Dawnie needs a swimsuit for the major-important b-beach party next weekend."

"Oh, right, I forgot." Buffy sighed. She had been forgetting a lot lately. Her mind just wasn't as clear as it usually was. Patrolling had been harder lately, even though she wasn't doing anymore than usual, and she was more tired than usual. Maybe Willow was right. Maybe she was worn out, and she could definitely go for a vacation. She needed to talk to her watcher, or actually, her self-declared "retired" watcher, Giles. "I wish Giles would hurry up and come home." She spoke her thoughts out loud causing everyone to look at her suddenly. She shrugged casually. "He's been in England since summer. I miss him." Since her first year of slaying, her sophomore year of high school, Rupert Giles had been like a second-father to Buffy, and even though he claimed she didn't need a watcher anymore, she did. More than even she liked to admit.

"We all miss Giles," Willow agreed. She had known him as long as Buffy had. "But, there was an emergency with the council and he had to go immediately!"

"That stupid council is always stealing my watcher!" Buffy pouted.

"Doesn't the point of being a 'watcher' actually involve some sort of watching? How can he watch you when he's a million miles away?" Dawn mimicked Buffy's defiant pout.

Tara spoke up with her usual words of wisdom, "Giles isn't your w-watcher anymore, and he's accountable t-to the council. They n-needed him and he did his duty and w-went to them..."

Buffy cut her off with more mumbling, "Have I mentioned how much I don't like the council"

"We know!" The three other girls cut her off with laughter.


	3. Chapter Three

Chapter Three: Are They Real?

"Bonjour mon amour! So, how much trouble are you in this time?" Joy's boyfriend, Henri, met her at her lockers the next morning. His charming French accent made her smile. She loved hearing his voice.

"The usual," After so many years, punishment had stopped fazing Joy. She got in trouble, her father punished her, the issue was dropped, she dealt, and they were all over it. It was a reliable system.

Henri smirked, "Why do you put yourself through it, sweetie?" He took her books from her as she closed and locked the locker.

"It's not a big deal, Henri." She took her books back and welcomed the arm he draped around her shoulders.

"But it is," Their opinions always differed. "Why don't you try not to piss them off? Just for a while, see how it goes. You never know, maybe you'll like being a good daughter."

"Henri, please, it's not like I try to upset them, it's just me. It's impossible for me to please my parents." She sighed knowing well that wasn't completely true. If she wanted to, Joy could be the ideal daughter her parents deserved, or at least wanted. She could dress herself in pink ruffles and be her mom's little doll or she could ace all her classes and be her dad's scholar, but instead she lived her life as she pleased, not caring about what anyone thought of her and that included her parents. _And why should I care? It's my life. _And that was basically the motto she lived by. It was her life to live however she wanted and no amount of 'bribing' punishment could alter her stubborn independence. "I'm never going to measure up to my parents, Henri. You know that." Throughout her sixteen years, people had often tried to compare Joy to her beautiful, retired-model mom, or her intelligent, honorable, judge dad, but all the comparisons fell short on Joy. She was nowhere close to their standards of perfection. "And you also know that I could care less." Her parents' personas were purely outward. At home, no one would understand the differences that went on.

"I still think you could try," Henri wasn't going to let things go that easily. "For me, avoid all conflicts with students that you know would inevitably lead to you breaking their bones and receiving detention...again."

Joy rebelled, "Come on, Kelly deserved what she got! You know that! I mean hell, she can say what she wants about me because I really don't give a shit, but no one disses my boyfriend and gets away with it!"

"Ah, you're too good to me sweetie," Henri squeezed her shoulders and she flinched from the contact. He noticed her wince and he instantly pulled the wide-neck shirt off her shoulder. "Joy!" He raised his voice to her when he saw fresh bruises in the shape of fingerprints.

"Nothing happened," Joy tried to shrug off his touch. "I must've bumped into a wall or something."

"Joy, je t'aime," Henri lowered his hand to her waist and kissed her cheek. "But, I worry for you."

"I know, and I love you too," Joy smiled and kissed him back. "I'm fine though, really!"

"Perhaps if you tried to behave for once, maybe your life would be...easier. Perhaps you're father would not, well, punish you so often," Henri noticed her eye roll and sighed. "I know, you think it's pointless. But still, just try alright?"

"I make no promises!" Joy grinned at him as they hurried into their first period, almost ten minutes late. As soon as she had taken her seat, Joy's face twisted in confusion.

"Is something wrong?" Henri leaned forward from his desk directly behind hers and spoke into her ear.

"No, not really," She was actually wondering why the teacher was so late. Mrs. Kentucky was the type of person who was always precise and on time for everything. Tardiness was greatly frowned upon by this teacher, and in her six years of teaching she had never missed a day of school.

"Where's the teacher?" Henri asked suddenly.

"I don't know, she's never late," As rebellious of a student as Joy was, Mrs. Kentucky happened to be one of the few teachers who was able to keep her interested during a class as boring as history. The teacher's strict composure amused Joy.

"Maybe she's sick." Henri suggested.

"Yea maybe so," Joy shrugged and tried to ignore the anxious feeling in her stomach. She smiled at her boyfriend and then turned around as the substitute teacher entered the classroom.

The next morning Joy was one of the first students in the classroom, very unusual for her, but she was hoping to see Mrs. Kentucky at the teacher's desk as normal. A substitute was still filling in for the absent teacher. Joy had woken that morning with a foreboding tingle pressing on her mind and now she worried that her recent fears were very real.

"Joy, have you seen the paper today?" Henri dropped into his desk behind his girlfriend and leaned forward questioningly.

"The paper?" Joy frowned. "No I haven't. Why?"

He shoved a single sheet from the morning's newspaper at her and she scanned it quickly. Then her eyes stopped on an article at the bottom corner of the page. Her eyes widened and her hands began to shake, rattling the thin paper.

"Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god!" Her voice was frantic. "Henri, what…" she couldn't finish the sentence. All she could do was stare at the terrible picture that had been attached to the article. It was an announcement of Mrs. Kentucky's death and the picture that accompanied it illustrated her supposed cause of death. She suddenly stood from her desk. "I've got to go!" She gathered up her binders.

"¿Qué?" Henri was puzzled at her unexpected announcement of departure. "I know you're upset about Mrs. Kentucky, but what are you going to do about it?

"I don't have time to explain," She slipped her red, mesh bag over one shoulder. "I'll talk to you later."

Joy ran from the classroom, ignoring the substitute's calls to stop, and didn't stop running until she had reached her destination: the library.

As strange as it may seem for a slacker-student, fight-picking, rebellious, young girl to enjoy good books, Joy did. In fact, Joy had always found the most comfort from books, in contrast to the socialite crowd-followers that made up the majority of her Beverly Hills high school. On long, hard days Joy found comfort in the library, browsing through the millions of books. Strangely, the ones that had interested her the most were the leather-bound and ancient-looking books that told of types of monsters and villains that Joy had only heard of in the worst of childhood stories. Something about these evil creatures hypnotized her in a peculiar way. Although they were stored in the library to be perceived as nothing more than mythology-based literature for students, she felt that these creepy stories stemmed from something serious, and in an unexplained way she felt somehow connected to their realism.

Now, she turned to a familiar book about a creature that killed by biting the victim's neck. They were called Vampires. Creatures of the night, they were often labeled the living dead. Flipping through the first three sections, Joy came to the part that mentioned the Vampire's killing pattern. It told of their razor-sharp fangs that they used to puncture the flesh on their victim's neck. There was an image on that page that showed an example of such a wound. Joy gasped as she stared at the two tiny holes, almost identical to the ones that the picture in the newspaper showed of Mrs. Kentucky's neck. An ominous shiver ran down Joy's spine as she turned the yellowed page and stared at an impeccable drawing of a vampire. She quickly flipped to the next page.

The remainder of the thick book was filled with facts about the creation of Vampires, habitual living conditions of the beasts, and multiple ways to protect oneself against a Vampire or to kill one.

_Vampires aren't real though. _Joy thought to herself as she continued reading through the book. _They couldn't be real! Could they? _The thought confused her. Sure, she had heard stories of the famous Vampire Dracula, but they were just stories, right? _What if there really are such things as Vampires? Are they what killed Mrs. Kentucky? _She shook her head in disbelief. Joy was a rather sensible girl, not one to jump to conclusions or to believe in ridiculous tales, but she couldn't make herself completely deny the possibility of the existence of demonic creatures roaming the earth.

_Brrrring_...the shrill bell alerted Joy to the ending of second period. After the trouble of yesterday she didn't want to miss anymore of her classes that day, Joy hurriedly put back the frightening book and rushed to her locker to collect her books for Biology.


	4. Chapter Four

Chapter Four: Henri Who?

By the end of that day, everyone had heard of Mrs. Kentucky's death. Some students grieved her, but most had never appreciated the teacher's strict teaching style and so they couldn't really care less; as sad as it may be. Joy, however, could not forget the kind teacher, or her mysterious death.

She did try to though, and after a couple days of heavy homework loads and taking extra shifts at her after school job at a clothing store on Melrose, Joy's mind unintentionally pushed the Vampire matter to the back.

Another welcome distraction from the teacher's horrible death was Henri. Henri and Joy had met the previous year, Joy's freshman year at her private high school. He was an exchange student from France and had decided to complete all of his high school years in California. They had become close very quickly and within one month of their first meeting everyone could tell that they were falling for each other; even the teachers could see it. Almost right away, they started dating and by the end of the second school month, Henri and Joy had declared their 'love' which was shared mutually between the two.

Almost a year had gone by since then and nothing had changed. The couple still spent every spare minute together. At school they were always seen together, walking the halls hand-in-hand, whispering to each other beneath the shady trees on the front lawn at lunch, or making out in front of the lockers in between classes...they were an adorable couple. There were many students in school who were jealous of the perfect lovebirds, but would never admit so publicly because that could be considered 'uncool'. See, as much as a trouble-maker as Joy was, no one at school felt that she should be associated with and even though Henri was an attractive guy, because of his relationship with Joy, he had more or less isolated himself from the other students as well.

"Henri, are we going to the dance together?" Joy's candid personality never failed. The dance she was referring to was the annual Halloween dance, coming up in only two more weeks.

"Isn't the girl supposed to wait to be asked by the guy?" Henri laughed as he followed his girlfriend into the cafeteria line for lunch.

"Sure, but this girl's tired of waiting!" Joy giggled.

"Well, maybe I'm not sure about asking you yet." Henri was joking of course. There was no one else in school he would even consider asking to the dance.

"Jerk!" Joy playfully slugged Henri in the arm. There was no force to her punch, but Henri winced in surprise pain.

"I'm just messing with you, sweetie." Henri kissed her apologetically. "Of course we're going to the dance."

Two weeks later, on the night of the dance, Joy had altogether forgotten her strange apprehension about the creatures she had found in the ancient manuscripts in the library. However, her fears were unfortunately rekindled when Henri did not arrive on time to pick her up for the dance.

"Maybe he's just late," Mrs. Peters tried to console her fretting daughter. For the first time in, well, a while, the mother and daughter were more or less getting along. They hadn't had any serious arguments since the last one concerning Joy's first school fight of the year and Joy had mostly been staying out of her usual trouble. Perhaps it had something to do with Henri's coaxing Joy to try and behave, but more likely they had both been too preoccupied with their separate lives to bother with one another. And tonight especially, Mrs. Peters was feeling partial to her daughter (Joy contributed that fact to the fancy, angel costume that she had chosen for the costume dance, and the fact that she had allowed her mother to fix her hair, for the first time since childhood). Of course, Mrs. Peters still wasn't thrilled with the black nail polish that Joy refused to remove and she was even less pleased with the discovery of the thorny, rose tattoo she had found on the back of her daughter's neck which was usually hidden by her long, thick hair.

"No, Henri's always annoyingly punctual!" Joy paced the length of the entryway nervously. "I think it's a French thing." Glancing at the hallway clock she sighed loudly. He was almost a half hour late now. "Something's wrong."

"Joy, don't panic." Mrs. Peters had never matured from the frivolous and blithe behaviors she had embraced as a teenager. "Have you called him?"

Joy shook her head and then retreated to the kitchen where she used the wall phone to call her boyfriend's cell phone. After letting it ring through to the answer machine, she left a brief and frantic message and then slammed the phone down on the cradle. _Something happened. That's the only explanation! Something terrible has happened. _Tears sprung to her eyes as her mind reeled with all the worst possibilities of things that could be prohibiting Henri from being there now.

The night passed and she heard nothing from her boyfriend. Joy chose not to attend the dance; going by herself would be miserable. She fell asleep early, still wearing the silvery white slip-dress that she would have worn for the costume dance; her head throbbed with the remnant of sobbing.

_Through the darkness a bright white face shone luminous. It was moving steadily towards her as if on a determined mission, inevitably with an unfortunate undertone of doom. Soon the person had neared enough for her to see the body that was attached to the alarming face, and this brought about a startled gasp from the girl. It was a ghastly sight. A tall, gangly sort of frame, cloaked in a grim black that made his body seemed to blend as one into the deep night. It contrasted with the pale face to such a degree that they seemed almost not to be connected. Then, all of a sudden, his mismatched figure was not her concern. He opened his mouth wide and a sort of vicious growl escaped from low in his throat. He appeared like a lion with his long, sharp teeth jutting out most terribly from his mouth. He lunged towards her with his hands extended like claws, without nails, and his violent teeth seemed preparing to latch onto her neck. Until this moment his face had been indeterminable, but just as he prepared to feed, his identity became instantly as clear as daylight: Henri..._

Joy awoke with a shriek before sunrise the next morning after her most horrid nightmare. _Henri!_ Her mind screamed out his name as she bolted upright in bed. Instantly the previous night surfaced in her mind and she again worried. _Henri, where are you?_ No matter how much she tried to calm herself and tell herself that everything was okay and that there was just some sort of misunderstanding concerning his whereabouts, there was no chance of assuaging the fears that were twisting her stomach into a painful knot.

She suddenly felt suffocated inside her room. The air was thick and muggy with the hazy remain of hair spray and perfume that had been wasted the night before in preparation for the big dance. Her head was pounding again and she felt nauseous. She had to get into fresh air. She hurriedly tiptoed out of her room and down the stairs to the front door. It was just after three thirty and Joy knew that her parents would both still be sound asleep and she wasn't in the mood to wake them up and have to deal with the grumpy, morning countenances. She was equally quiet as she hurried through the front door and then through the security gate at the end of the driveway. Finally she was out of the bounds of her home and began wandering along the sidewalks of the sleepily-still Bell Air neighborhood.

Her head was aching and the loudness of her own uncontrollable sobbing made her unaware of any of her surroundings and so her heart leapt in surprise when Joy was stopped by an icy hand gripping her arm. With a scream, she spun around and found herself staring into his face.

"Henri?" Joy's voice was short and breathy with surprise. "It's you!" She felt like crying with happiness and relief. "What happened last night? Where were you?" Her excitement in seeing her boyfriend after all her fears from the night before crowded her mind and she didn't even notice how pale and strange he looked, nor did she bother to question what he was doing in her neighborhood so early in the morning. "I waited, and I called you, but you never came and you never answered! I was so worried!" She rambled when she was excited, or nervous, or confused...she rambled quite often actually. "I was scared about you." When Joy stepped closer to him and wrapped her arms around his neck in a hug, she noticed how oddly cold his skin was. He still hadn't answered her, but now that familiar pang of foreboding began pounding in her head and she knew that something was wrong. "Henri," She whispered barely audible into his ear. "What's going on?" As she pulled away and looked at his face, a scream caught in her throat.

"Damn girl, you look sexy!" His voice seemed to have grown lower and raspier. He grinned wickedly, revealing two long pointy fangs. His face looked horribly pruned and scrunched around the forehead, and his eyes glowed a ghastly, lurid yellow.

"Henri, what happened to you?" Joy's voice shook.

"I don't know, but I feel incredible!" He laughed, but it wasn't his laugh that Joy was used to. It was a terrible cackling sound and she wanted to cover her ears with her hands. He sounded wicked.

"This isn't you, Henri." Tears sprang to her eyes and she couldn't control them "Who did this to you?" She started backing away from him when he stepped closer, reaching his hand out to touch her hair. "Please, you've changed." she sobbed. "Come back to me, Henri!"

"Henri?" He laughed again. "Henri who? No, I don't want to be him anymore. Henri was weak. He was an idiot. You're right I have changed. And it's amazing!" His sharp, white teeth caught the reflection of a streetlamp and they seemed iridescent in the dim light. "You could be changed too, you know. We could be changed together." He stepped closer to her until she had been backed up against a nearby gate surrounding one of her neighbor's houses.

"Get away from me," She spoke through gritted teeth.

"Don't you want to be with me, Joy? We could be together, forever." He touched her cheek with one of his cold, clammy hands.

"No!" She cried miserably. "Not like this. You're a Vampire, Henri!" Saying the words made her realize how true everything really was and made her cry harder. "You're dead, dammit!" Her tears were bitter and her voice was cracked with ferocious sobbing.

"Je t'aime, mon amour," The Vampire Henri leaned close to her neck.

His French words which would usually make Joy melt at the sound now repulsed her. Suddenly, the rage inside of Joy burst and she shoved Vampire Henri away from her with all the force she could muster (which was a lot and much more than she knew that she had). With the most confused look of shock on his face, Vampire Henri flew backwards, landing hard on his back and skidding at least five feet on the rough pavement. Quickly, he jumped up to a standing position and instantly pounced on her, his teeth flashing as swords would flash in a battle. Losing no time, Joy retaliated with a fierce blow to his nose. Again he was caught off guard and his head jerked back in pained confusion. For just long enough he was stunned and Joy immediately broke into a sprint, heading to her house. She didn't even look back to see if he was following her.

_This can't be happening! This can't be real!_ Joy didn't stop crying the entire run back to her house and the tears continued as she punched in the security code to her gate and raced to her house. From the large library manuscripts, she had learned that vampires could not enter a house without invitation and she hoped that were true as she stepped inside the front door and closed it securely. She rested her back against the door and slid down to a hunched-shoulder sitting position where she cried herself sick contemplating the nightmarish truth that she had to face that morning: Henri was a Vampire. So with that fact, it meant that Vampires were very real!

  



	5. Chapter Five

Chapter Five: Riley's Return

The coming of November brought about an exciting, new development in the Summers' household. All the girls were still missing the beloved Giles, but they managed to get on without him. Dawn had more or less taken over his 'job' of research, usually with the Wicca's assistance and Buffy faithfully continued her duty of slaying, no matter how worn out she became.

As much as Buffy tried to fill her time thinking only on the necessaries in her life, mainly patrolling and taking care of her little sister, she couldn't forget the brief mention of a desire for a boyfriend. Her last solid relationship had ended almost a year ago. She hadn't actually had too many serious relationships in her twenty years; actually she had only had two that could be considered serious.

The most recent of these was with Riley Finn, the handsome assistant for one of her college professors. Their relationship had been very serious. She would even say it went to the point of love. Definitely love. She and Riley had been together for only a few months, but they had shared more then love. They shared the secret of her life as a slayer, something that few people had the privilege of knowing, apart from her closest friends of course. His likewise secret life working for the government in the division of demons made him understanding and even helpful in her patrolling. She had missed him a lot since he had been gone, but lately he seemed all she was able to think about.

"Buffy's what's wrong?" Dawn was accompanying her sister for a change on her nightly patrol. When Buffy was unusually quiet for so long, Dawn was worried.

Buffy snapped out of her memories. "Huh? Oh, sorry Dawn," she turned to her sister apologetically. "I was just thinking about...well, my mind was somewhere else." She tried to smile reassuringly.

"Are you sure?" Dawn had an annoying habit of being able to read her sister's mind like a child's picture book. "Buffy, you haven't seemed like yourself lately."

"Why does everyone keep saying that? I'm fine!" Buffy sighed in exasperation. "I'm just tired."

"Maybe we should go home, you know just skip patrol tonight." Dawn suggested.

"Oh and let a fresh group of bloodsucking fiends run wild about the town? No thanks," Buffy continued leading the familiar path towards the cemetery and Dawn followed with no more mention of her sister's weariness. It would only upset her, and frankly, Dawn thought Buffy was scary when she was mad.

After that night, Buffy made her best attempts to keep her spirits high, no matter how forced the buoyancy was, whenever she was around her friends. However, no one believed her act. Her close friends and her sister still felt that something was weighing hard on the slayer's mind, and everyone was worried for her wellbeing.

The first Friday in November left Buffy alone on patrol. Dawn had a date with Colin (Buffy was starting to believe that they might become a couple very soon if their weekly dates continued), and Tara and Willow had asked for some alone time at the house which Buffy gave them kindly. Usually when those three were busy, Buffy would call Xander Harris, her second best friend besides Willow, but tonight he also had plans. He had agreed to work at the Magic Shop with his ex-fiancée, Anya. The only other person, well sort of person, she would patrol with would be Spike, and she just wasn't that desperate.

_Oh, woe is me,_ Buffy whined to herself dramatically and sullenly. _Everyone has a life except for me! God, my life is so pathetic. _Sure she was out every night risking her life to save a million strangers, but that didn't really measure up on the scale of life. Normal jobs, money, dates...those were the things that mattered in the world today! Not being the 'Chosen One' to fight against the world of evil! No one cared about that sort of thing.

She was so lost in her self-disparaging thoughts that she hadn't noticed someone else's silent presence join her in the cemetery. Finally though, the newcomer spoke.

"What happened to all your incredible 'slayer' sense?" His voice was deep and familiar. It was a voice that Buffy had played over and over in her mind so many times since she had last heard it. Now she turned around slowly, barely daring to hope...

"Riley?"

He stood at the edge of the cemetery, dressed in his usual preppy garb of black slacks and a sophisticated sweater. He looked the same as he did when he left almost a year ago, except perhaps a little older or more mature.

"Hey," He grinned and she realized how much she had missed that relaxed half-smile.

"What are you...why are you here?" She had yet to move from the ground her feet seemed suddenly riveted in. He also was strangely stationary. Both were obviously overwhelmed by seeing each other again after so long.

"Well," Riley finally broke the stillness and began walking slowly towards his ex. "I'm back."

Buffy tried to smile, but her lips were dry with surprise and her smile froze in formation. "Obviously," Her voice was as low as a whisper. She seemed hopeful yet doubtful and afraid to let down her built up apprehension about his return. "Why are you here?" She asked again.

"Vacation," He shrugged with a quick grin.

"Who would come to Sunnydale for vacation? Oh I know, it's our hotels with the view of our very own Hellmouth!" She let her inhibitions down a little and let out a smile.

"Well, I wanted to see..." He stopped, not sure if he should continue.

"Yes?"

"You," He finished his thoughts and her smile grew.

"Really, you aren't just saying that as a form of bribery to get me to help you bring down some big evil?" Buffy paused for a second.

"Would it work?" Riley laughed slightly.

"Very possibly," Buffy laughed too.

"No, not this time," He came closer to her still and soon they were only a couple feet apart. "I'm not here on business. I'm just here to see you."

"Well, it's about time!" She took a step closer until they were within arm's distance.

"Yea, I thought so," He shrugged. Their conversation was nothing more than meaningless words trying to fill the awkward void that would surely arise if they were to stop talking long enough to think of something significant to say. But it was enough. "How is everyone? Dawn and Willow, Xander?"

"They're good," Buffy nodded. "They'd like to see you, especially Dawn. She's missed you."

"Yea, I'd like to see them too."

They were both quiet for a minute. Riley couldn't stop staring at Buffy, but Buffy's eyes were focused anywhere except her ex-boyfriend's face. Their silence was interrupted by the sudden attack of a vampire which Buffy quickly and skillfully dusted while Riley watched. When she finished she returned to Riley with a satisfied smile.

"So, do you have somewhere to stay?" Buffy brushed the few remaining specks of vampire dust off of her jeans.

"Well, do you know of any good hotels?"

"Actually no, but I do know of a really cute bed and breakfast a couple of blocks from here!" Buffy grinned. Riley seemed to believe her for a minute. "Riley, I'm kidding. Stay with us!"

"Are you sure?" Riley smiled but wanted to be certain that he wasn't forcing Buffy into offering by her sense of obligation.

"Of course I'm sure," Buffy took a quick survey of the cemetery and then started leading the way down the street towards her house, only one block away. "I'll move into Dawn's room and you can have...mine."

"If you're sure," Riley followed close to her side. They didn't speak for the rest of the walk but as soon as Buffy opened the door and called out "we're here", they were greeted appropriately by the rest of the household.

Willow and Tara were on the couch in the living room in an adorable cuddle while watching TV. As soon as Buffy made her announcement, Willow untwined herself from Tara's arms and came out to the entryway to meet them.

"Spike, Dawnie wanted to talk to you..." her words ceased when she realized that the 'we' that Buffy had mentioned did not include her usual patrolling partner. "Riley," Willow's eyes grew wide but other than that, no expression was noticeable.

"Hey, Willow," He hesitated and then stuck out his hand, not sure how he should greet her. "How've you been?"

"Fine," Willow shrugged and shook his hand with the same hesitation that he had. "Tara," She stuck her head back into the living room and beckoned to her girlfriend. "Come and see who's here."

Tara timidly joined the others who were still grouped about the door. "R-Riley," Her expression showed the surprise that Willow's face had missed. "You're b-back."

He didn't have a chance to reply because at that moment they were interrupted by a thrilled squeal. "Oh my God! Riley!" Dawn came flying down the staircase, trying hard not to trip in her slippered feet. "You're back!" She leapt from the second to last stair and almost landed in Riley's arms. "Oh I knew you would come back!"

"Hey Dawn," Riley picked up the child-like teenager in a huge hug. "Did you miss me?"

"Not really," Dawn shrugged as he set her back on the ground, then with a slow grin she nodded. "You didn't even say goodbye!"

"I know, I'm sorry about that kiddo," Riley hung his head apologetically. "Forgive me?"

"I guess," Dawn nodded and hooked her arm in his. "How long are you staying?"

Buffy looked at Riley suddenly as if she hadn't even thought to ask that question. She waited for his answer anxiously.

Riley glanced at Buffy before answering, "I'm not sure yet."

No one questioned again. They were all so glad to see him returned that they didn't want to think about him leaving again. He was back now and that was what mattered to his friends, and to Buffy.


	6. Chapter Six

Chapter Six: A Guardian Angel

"I don't understand!" A young man stood before two brilliant individuals, confused and uncertain.

"Perception is a privilege that you have not yet been granted." One of the beings spoke with an ethereal echo to its voice. The voice revealed nothing of a gender, mostly because its owner couldn't be entirely classified as human. It was a being and nothing else could describe it. It and its companion existed in another realm all of its own, in no way connected with the simple baseness of earth. Along with their neutrality of species, the beings could neither be classified as good or evil. They just were. They existed on their own plane of a nonaligned status.

"Why me?" The man questioned them without restraint.

"It is not your place to insist inquiries upon us, Vampire. You shall be enlightened in due time." The second being now spoke with a voice equally enchanting and otherworldly.

"Of course," the man whom they had addressed as a vampire bowed apologetically. "I'm sorry, it's just that, I'd find it easier to accept this, umm, mission, if I could understand the reason that it has been assigned to me."

"Be still and be silent, creature that is not of the living and neither of the dead." The celestial beings spoke together, their harmonious voices blending as one. The vampire was instantly silent in reverence and awe. "We have called you away from all other insignificant earthlings because of your past excellence. You have risen yourself above others like yourself and now you must be rewarded. We are giving you this charge for your experience and examples of a responsible and sound mind. Take heed to our words, Vampire, do not fail us." And with one last hum of magnificently, airy vibration, the beings disappeared leaving behind them an illumination where their figures once floated. The sudden light grew brighter than the brightest sun but it was not a harmful light and it in no way irritated the vampire's eyes. Instead the brightness felt soft and warm and rejuvenating. The voices whispered about his head like the fluttering of a butterfly's wings and then in an instant silence ensued.

His mind went dark and blank, for how long he couldn't be certain, but the next thing he knew, the vampire was lying face down on cold pavement, and rain was steadily pelting his back. He blinked twice and rolled onto his back. He couldn't explain why his body ached or why his head throbbed, but the wet rainfall was refreshing. Sitting up slowly, all the while holding a hand to his pounding head, the undead man tried to recall how he had arrived on the sidewalk he woke on.

Everything came back to him at once, though not as clearly or as certainly as he would have preferred. Things came back to him in pieces and the details were misty, almost as though he were dreaming or seeing a mirage. He remembered enough though, and as soon as the hammering in his head subsided, he stood and headed in a solid direction down the street; he hoped he was going the right way, he had decided to leave that much to fate.

Although he knew now what he had to do, it was still difficult for the vampire to understand, but the Powers had told him that it was not yet time for his knowledge on such matters and so he forsake his confused questioning. He knew enough of the Beings to know that when They thought he was ready, They would inform him. So, now, he walked determinedly, but blindly, in order to fulfill his assignment.

He figured that it would be easy. He thought it would be quick. And he had decided that it could be fun. Well, at least on the latter point he might be able to succeed, but on the first two...This 'mission' would be anything but simple, and 'long' would fall short to describe it.

This night of headaches and confusion only signaled the beginning of a very difficult, complex, and lasting event that the vampire would not be able to complete in a matter of hours from finding his destination. This night was only the beginning.

_A/N: Please review! I would really like to keep this story going and I think I can take it somewhere good, but without reviews I don't really have the encouragement to keep writing. All feedback appreciated!_


	7. Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven: Welcome to Sunnydale

Silence was never more appreciated. The past month and a half had been a whirlwind of trauma for Joy. So much had happened that she had never dreamed possible even in her worst nightmares and now she was just barely suffering through the aftermath.

_"Spend all your time waiting  
__for that second chance  
__for a break that would make it okay  
__there's always one reason  
__to feel not good enough  
__and it's hard at the end of the day  
__I need some distraction  
__oh beautiful release  
__memory seeps from my veins  
__let me be empty  
__and weightless and maybe  
__I'll find some peace tonight..."_

Sarah McLaughlin crooned from the CD player as Joy buried her head in her pillows, crying out all of her pain and frustrations. Since that tragic night, in November Joy had experienced no peace and hardly any time for remorse. Tonight, thankfully, she finally had the down time she so badly needed in order to recuperate. For so long she had been unable to cry but now it seemed all she could do. She had never known such pain. Tears clouded her eyes and she couldn't help but cry.

_"...in the arms of an angel  
fly away from here  
from this dark cold hotel room  
and the endlessness that you fear  
you are pulled from the wreckage  
of your silent reverie  
you're in the arms of the angel  
may you find some comfort there..._

Joy was interrupted by the sound of a car pulling into the driveway. Glancing at the digital clock on her bedside table, she knew that it was her Aunt and Uncle returning home. Rolling off her bed, Joy rushed down the hallway to the bathroom to wash her face before her new 'parents' found her blubbering.

"Get your ass down here!" Joy heard her uncle bellowing from the base of the stairs.

She frowned and shut off the faucet in the bathroom. She hurried down the hall and stopped at the top of the steps.

When her uncle saw her he yelled again. "Did you think you could get away with it, you little bitch?"

"What's up, Uncle Dale?" She asked as innocently as she could, which actually wasn't very hard since she honestly had no idea why he was pissed...this time.

"I just got a call from your principal," Her uncle's voice was not getting any quieter or calmer.

"So?" Joy started down the stairs, slowly and uncertainly. Even though she knew why the principal of her new school had called her uncle, she wasn't sure yet how her uncle would respond. But, by his loudness, she was certain that he would be angry.

"He said you haven't even come to school yet!" Joy's aunt now joined the conversation with the same loudness as her husband, except in a higher and scratchier voice. Joy didn't answer. She also stopped descending the stairs. At this point she had decided that staying a good distance from her enraged relatives would be a good choice.

"I want an explanation!" Dale's voice boomed and he folded his arms threateningly across his chest, "Now!"

Joy shrugged, "What do you want me to say?"

"You've missed over two weeks of school, bitch, so don't go mouthing off at me!" Dale started climbing the steps towards his niece and she nervously started backing up the stairs away from him. She really felt that his excessive use of profanities was unecessary. "Now, under any other circumstances I wouldn't give a shit about your life, but as your legal guardians we have a responsibility to make you get an education. That means that you go to school!"

"Look, I've missed a few days, big deal." Joy reached the top step but tripped as she stepped backwards onto the second floor landing and stumbled, catching herself on the wall behind her back. "School's not exactly my priority right now."

"Not your priority?" He nearly screamed. "That's not your decision!"

"Uncle Dale," She wasn't sure what to say to make her inevitable punishment less severe then it would be. "I'm not ready for a new school, yet."

"Like hell you aren't!" Dale reached for her and managed to grab hold of Joy's leg and with one hard tug she was on her back, grunting in unexpected pain.

"Dammit," Joy gasped as he held onto her ankle and yanked hard, pulling her down the steps until she was on his level. "Uncle Dale, come on, it was just a few days and I can make up what I've missed!" His hand connected with her face and she realized that he wasn't in the mood to listen to her pleas and promises. A second fierce blow knocked her off of her balance and sent her tumbling down the steep flight of stairs. Half sliding and half tumbling, Joy bumped and banged against the steps feeling her skin melt into instant bruises. When she finally landed at the bottom of the stairs, she couldn't move for almost a full minute from the pain. Tears formed involuntarily and she tried blinking to clear them away.

"That'll teach you to ignore my orders," Dale continued up the steps, disregarding the young girl in a painful heap on the floor.

"Aunt Joanne," Joy glanced up at her aunt whose stone-cold expression almost matched her uncle's stone-cold heart.

"You're pathetic," Joanne scowled at her niece and then turned away, leaving the girl all alone.

Joy shut her eyes tight as though blocking out her surroundings would somehow help to block out her pain. For a while she kept her position on the floor but eventually she pulled herself up, using the banister for assistance, and began the slow trudge up the stairs to her room where she dropped onto her bed in irritable exhaustion. _I can tell I'm going to love this new home. _Joy sighed deeply and snuggled up under her blankets before drifting off into a fitful sleep.

_A high-pitched scream was followed by a frantic sound of fighting. However, it didn't sound like an even battle, it sounded more like one side was a struggle and the other was a conquer. Soon there was only silence. Moments later, a mysterious shadow slid across the nearby gravestone. As the shadow moved past the trees its owner was revealed. The wrinkled forehead and pointy teeth were just barely visible in the light from the crescent moon. The monster began to emerge from the trees' protection when a girl leapt out from behind a crypt and issued a furious attack on the creature. Her skill was impeccable and within ten minutes she had driven a wooden stake into the beast's chest and he was no more than a pile of dust. The girl's breathing was heavy but felt in no way unusual. Glancing around the graveyard for any other signs of danger, the girl stood and lifted her head in careless success. The moon's light illuminated her face..._

"Oh my god," Joy sat up in bed with a start. "What the hell was that?" She had never had such a vivid dream, except for the time that she had dreamt about Henri being a vampire. But this was very strange. She couldn't understand why so many of her dreams lately were revolving around the undead. And now, why she was fighting them in her dreams!


	8. Chapter Eight

Chapter Eight: The Council Calls

"Dawn," Buffy leaned around the kitchen wall and hollered up the staircase. "Come and eat breakfast before school!" 

"I'm coming!" Dawn yelled back from somewhere upstairs. 

"Well hurry up!" Buffy returned to the kitchen where Willow was fixing herself a mug of herbal tea. 

"Buffy," Willow stirred some honey into her tea and put on her lecture face. "I think you should lay off of Dawnie a little. You're always bossing her around and well kind of preaching at her. She's not a little girl you know, she's a young woman and girls her age like their independence..." 

"I know Wil," Buffy sighed and fixed the coffee grinds in the machine. "It's hard though you know, she's my little sister, and I just want to protect her..." 

"I'm here, I'm here," Dawn wandered into the kitchen, all but dragging her feet behind her. 

"You're going to be late," Buffy commented on her sister's lethargy and then glanced at Willow just in time to receive the disapproving head shake. 

"I'm not going to be late, Buffy!" Dawn sighed in frustration as she glanced at the digital clock on the stove and noticed that she still had almost forty-five minutes before school started and the building was only a seven minute drive from their house. 

"Whatever, just eat," Buffy wasn't in a very pleasant mood. She was finding herself more and more tired after patrols and with Riley back in her life, her mind wasn't exactly peaceful. 

"And further more-" Dawn began to whine again but was cut off when the kitchen door opened and their good friend Xander walked in. 

"Hello ladies," He grinned, his silly ear-to-ear grin. "Look what I ran into outside!" He stepped aside and an older man, dressed in a light, tweed suit, stepped through the door. "The prodigal watcher has returned!" 

"Giles!" The whole room exclaimed in unison when they recognized the man. 

"Good morning girls," Giles smiled. "Did you miss me much?" 

Buffy and Dawn were instantly on their feet and at his side. In turn he gave each of the three girls a hug. 

Once they had all greeted each other and welcomed Giles appropriately, they settled down in the living room, joined by Tara and Riley, where they discussed the latest happenings with the England council. Giles informed the group of the newest developments concerning the slayer. He announced the fact that a new slayer has arrived. 

"Arrived?" Buffy questioned, confused as to Giles' word choice. 

"Yes, she has arrived here in Sunnydale. Recently, as a matter of fact," Giles informed the group. "And the council has assigned me to be her watcher." 

"Wait," Willow frowned. "There's a new slayer?" 

"Yes," Giles didn't understand her confusion. 

"I thought that there couldn't be a new slayer until the old one...died." She hesitated and glanced at Buffy in concern. "And the slayer's not dead." 

Buffy laughed, "Thank you for that clarification, Wil. But, Giles, she has a point. I'm not dead, and I haven't died anytime recently, so how is there a new one?" 

"Well, you were not the only slayer, Buffy," Giles explained slowly. 

No one seemed to understand at first but then suddenly Xander spoke up, "Faith." 

"Oh god, Faith!" Buffy exclaimed, louder than Xander. "Faith's dead?" 

"Well, yes, that is the assumption considering the arrival of the new slayer and the perfect health of Buffy." Giles stated. 

"Wow!" Willow sighed, "Faith was always such a wild, and, umm, fierce girl! I didn't think she'd ever be killed." As soon as she said it she gasped. "I didn't mean to say it like that," She shook her head. "That was so heartless, I'm sorry!" 

"Willow, sweetie, don't worry about it." Tara tried to comfort the distraught red-head. "You didn't mean anything by it, we know that." 

"How did she die, Giles?" Buffy asked solemnly. 

"She was killed, I'd assume." Giles answered with a shrug. 

"Was it a Vampire?" Buffy asked curiously. It was normal, of course, for a slayer to wonder when she heard that the only other slayer had died. It would be strange for Buffy not to want to know how Faith died. 

"The council is not certain as to the particulars of her death but they are certain that she was killed. It would not be presumptuous to say it was some sort of demon." Giles answered. 

Everyone was silent for a moment, either out of reverence or out of stunned confusion. Faith had never been as well-behaved as Buffy, but she had been just as good as a fighter, sometimes even better when she was really worked up. However, she had a temper to match her skill and that could not be overlooked. While she had spent a few short months of her life fighting for the 'better good' and all that, the rest of her life had been filled with anger and intolerable violence which made it impossible for her to ever be fully accepted by Buffy and her crew. 

Finally, Buffy broke the silence. "So, what are we supposed to do now? You're going to train this new girl and she'll come and be another me?" 

"Well, I doubt there could ever be another you," Giles smiled at his first slayer. 

"That's for sure," Xander laughed. 

"And thank god for that too," Dawn added with a sarcastic giggle. 

"Okay, okay, I get the pictures guys you don't have to paint it out with acrylics for me!" Buffy stood and started to pace. "So, who is this new slayer?" 

"Well, you see, that is the problem," Giles removed his glasses and cleaned them with a handkerchief from his pocket. "The council did not tell me who she is. They gave me some information about her and then told me that I should be able to find her myself." 

"What, to prove that your watcher-worthy or something?" Willow asked with a puzzled frown. 

"Actually, yes," Giles replaced his glasses to his face. "Since I have been...unofficially retired for quite a while, they have requested for me to find her on my own to show that I still have the, umm, ability." 

"That's stupid," Dawn decided. "You've been a watcher longer than I've been a human!" At this comment everyone had to smile. Dawn was of course referring to her previous life as a 'Key', or a mystical being which could bring about an end-of-the-world type trauma. Luckily, Buffy had ended that threat by giving her life and now Dawn was a normal girl with nothing supernatural about her. 

"Anyhow," Giles returned to the crucial new-slayer subject. "I must find her soon, because for all we know she is running around being target for some new assemblage of demons!" He took out his glasses again and the group could tell that he was becoming anxious. 

"Okay, don't start getting all grumpy and ranty," Buffy took charge. "How hard could it be to find a new girl in a town the size of my dream closet?" The guys frowned but all the girls nodded in understanding of the closet reference. "What did the council tell you about her?" She retrieved a notepad from the desk against the wall and prepared to scribble down a list. 

"From what I have gathered from the council, very discreet information, she is young," Giles began. "In fact, it is very possible that she is a new Sunnydale High student, so Dawn, you may help by finding out if there are any new students in your school. Also, as far as their knowledge goes, she has recently experienced a very serious tragedy..." 

"What kind of tragedy?" Buffy asked. "I mean like an oh-my-god-I-broke-a-nail tragedy, or an Iliad and the Odyssey tragedy." 

"Buffy, what sort of a question is that? I have just told you that this young girl has been through a tragic experience and you're making jokes!" Giles lectured. 

"I didn't mean it as a joke Giles," Buffy tried to apologize. "I was just curious as to how 'tragic' a high school student's life could be!" 

"Oh well when you put it that way, it's so much kinder." Giles shook his head. Neither of them meant anything by their little spats, but Giles and Buffy were good at bickering. He was very much like a father in that way. "For your information, she has lost both of her parents." 

"Oh," Buffy suddenly sobered. "I'm sorry Giles. I didn't mean to be rude. She must be going through a lot." 

"Yes indeed," Giles returned to his speech. "Now, the fact of the matter is, I have to somehow find this new girl and inform her of her destiny and hope that she accepts it better than you did..." 

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean!" Buffy interrupted again. "I was always a perfect slayer student!" 

"Yea, sure you were," Xander grinned, knowing perfectly well that Buffy was less than enthusiastic the first time she found our about her destiny as 'the Slayer'. 

"Furthermore, how do we know what her living situation is? I remember how difficult it was for you to evade your mother, Buffy, when you first began to slay. I do hope that it is simpler for her to join us for late-night patrol. Your mother was quite difficult to avoid at times!" 

"Giles, chill!" Dawn laughed, "You sound like a British, clown-dictionary when you ramble." 

"A what?" Tara spoke up. 

Giles ignored Dawn's comment and continued. "I suppose that all we can do is wait and pray that the council gives us more information soon, so that we can find this girl." He slumped back in his chair and everyone could tell that he was stressing over the situation. 

"We'll all do our best to look for any new girls who seem like they have just been through a tragedy, okay?" Willow promised Giles and he nodded. 

"We should probably tell Spike and Anya," Buffy suggested. "You know, just so they can keep their eyes open." 

"Yes, good idea, do that." Giles babbled. His thoughts were obviously still focused on the new slayer and how in the world he was going to succeed in being her watcher if he couldn't even find her. Of course, Sunnydale wasn't that gigantic, and there couldn't be that many new students who transferred to the high school halfway through the year, but he worried. If he didn't find her soon, something could happen to her. Vampires tended to have a type of sixth sense about slayers and seemed to be able to track them down surprisingly easily. If a Vampire found her before Giles did, then something could happen to her. He couldn't lose this girl. He knew nothing about her yet, and there was no telling what kind of girl she would turn out to be; as far as he could tell, she could be the next bad-girl Faith, or the next self-sacrificing Kendra...but that didn't matter. Giles felt it absolutely imperative to find this girl and quickly.


	9. Chapter Nine

_A/N: Okay, so I know that I said I wouldn't continue without reviews…but seriously, I'm going to keep writing no matter what because I love it and I think this story is fun and I've got a plan to it. It's just that reviews are really encouraging and when I know that people are reading my story, it makes it that much more enjoyable for me to keep writing! So if it's not too difficult for you to review if you read my story, that'd make me a very happy girl! Thanks a ton! XOXO Nat_

Chapter Nine: Trouble with Making Friends

Being a transfer student was the worst. Of course, Joy didn't know that because she had never been a transfer student. She had grown up in LA, Beverly Hills to be more exact, and had gone to school in the high-society city since preschool. She didn't really care either. During the couple weeks that she had been ditching school, Joy had made the decision to hate her new school and everyone in it. Well, maybe not but she was very resolute about her choice to continue as a rebel. 

"Hi, I'm checking in!" Joy joked with a forced smile as she stepped up to the counter at the administration office. The woman standing there obviously didn't get the humor. Her face was blank, but if she had made an expression Joy was certain it would have been a very sour one. 

"Wait here." The woman's demand was curt but firm and Joy knew that she was no longer in the giddy and carefree city of Beverly Hills. She stood still, waiting for the straight-face woman to return. 

When the lady did return, she beckoned to Joy and sent her into an adjoining room which had a label on the door reading: Principal Hart. 

"Good morning," A tall man stood and walked around to the front of his desk, leaning against the edge of it in a relaxed and friendly manner. "I am Principal Hart, and you are the new student." He was candid and seemed a little strange, but his smile appeared unusually friendly and fun so Joy didn't close him immediately as she usually would with adults in a commanding position over her. 

"That's a good guess, Principal Hart." Joy sat down without an invitation from the principal and nonchalantly fingered the fringed edges of her white halter top. 

He frowned for a minute and then smiled at her and she again thought he was interesting and maybe a little funny. "Yea, anyway...the usual introduction...welcome to Sunnydale High, hope you like it, if you have any questions...ya-da-ya-da. Intros are overrated, so let's just cut to it, this is high school, nothing new for you right?" She shook her head, liking this funny principal more and more each minute. He shoved a pile of papers towards her. "So, you have your class schedules and your locker number, and well if you get lost...ask someone." He nodded affirmably and motioned back to the front office. "Try not to frequent my office, okay?" 

Joy frowned. _He's a strange principal. He's amusing though. _With a nod and a smile she left his office, her hands full of papers including her locker location and lock combination. _I think I like him. He's not as serious as Principal Nelson. He's sarcastic. To bad he's a principal or else he could be a pretty cool guy, maybe_. The school was bigger than it seemed from the outside and in a few minutes of wandering the very crowded halls, Joy was thoroughly lost. _Left, _she thought to herself turning in that direction down another wing of cold, linoleum floors and shiny, metal lockers. That didn't go where she wanted. _Right?_ She hoped turning down another wing, to no avail. _I'm going to be late on my first day. Spectacular._ The thought made her smirk and she didn't really take the thought too seriously. She thought about asking someone, but Joy had her 'new girl' pride and was determined to find her lockers herself. 

Finally she did, but then there was the new problem of her combination not working. _3...12...0...and...37. _She read the numbers three times through, each time trying the combination again, it still would not unlock. The five minute warning bell rang and her irritation rose. With a final sigh of frustration, she yanked hard on the metal lock and it snapped. As strange as it sounds for metal to snap, Joy was equally surprised at how easily it broke free. _Oh God, I hope no one saw that!_ She glanced over her shoulder nervously. _I don't want to be a freak on my first day!_ Then she laughed, _whatever, like I really care._

Quickly, she stuffed a few of her empty notebooks into the locker and then began reading over her class schedule. _First period...History...yuck. _And so she left her locker, making a mental note to get the lock fixed, and then began another frantic search around the school, this time for her classroom, which ended up being more failure for her. _I'm really starting to hate new schools!_ She decided as the students started scurrying faster about the hallways, obviously in a hurry to their classes. _Well, sure, they all know where they're going!_ She sighed,_ yea, umm, being sarcastic in my head, really isn't helping._ And so her thoughts ceased while she continued rushing down the emptying hallways, quickly checking the labels on each of the doors. 

"Excuse me!" With her head down Joy hadn't seen the student running hurriedly towards her, in a rush to beat the tardy bell, and they collided. Papers flew, bags dropped, purses emptied...it was a mess, "I am so sorry!" She apologized repetitively to the tall girl. 

"Ah, don't be. I'm sure it's my fault! God, I'm such a klutz!" Her laugh sounded shaky as though there was something much more serious on her mind than being clumsy. 

Joy took it upon herself to investigate and discover. "Are you alright?" she asked in true concern as she helped the 'klutz' gather the contents that had spilled from her book bag. 

"Yea, I'm fine." The girl suddenly became stiff as if she didn't want the strange, petite blonde prying into her affairs; which was understandable though, of course. 

"Are you sure? I mean you seem sort of...anxious." Joy couldn't think of a better word to describe the girl's strange, jittery behavior. 

"God, nosy much?" She stood and re-slung her book bag over a shoulder. 

"I'm sorry," Joy frowned at the girl's curt behavior. _Great, Joy! Way to make friends! Why not just shout out that creatures with fangs killed your parents while you're at! I'm sure that'd get the students lining up to compete for best friend status..._ "Look, I didn't mean..." 

"Yea, whatever," The girl brushed a lock of her long, light-brown hair out of her face. 

Even though this girl probably wanted nothing to do with Joy, she couldn't get over the desire to make friends with her. "It's my first day. I'm Joy." Joy tried to ease the previous tension that she had created. 

"Okay," the girl glanced at the watch on her wrist. "I'm late for class." And with that she turned and started running down the hall. Suddenly she turned and came back towards Joy. "Did you say that you're new?" 

Joy had gotten irritated with the girl's rudeness and now she wasn't in the mood to be friendly with her. "Yea, whatever, bye!" Joy turned and started to leave but the girl rushed after her. 

"Wait, please!" Joy didn't stop but the girl kept up. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be rude. My name's Dawn." 

Joy still didn't turn around, she kept walking down the hallway even though she still wasn't sure if she was going in the right direction. "No offense, but I'd really not like to be late on my first day." 

Dawn sighed and followed Joy for another minute before she spoke again. "Do you know where you're going?" 

"Yes," Joy answered too quickly. "I'll figure it out." 

"Fine," Dawn stopped abruptly. "Nice meeting you." 

Joy finally found her first period class and arrived only a few minutes late. However, the annoying Dawn happened to be in five of Joy's classes, a little unusual for a large school, but Joy did her best to ignore her classmate. 

Fourth period Spanish class introduced a new annoying student into Joy's life. She had just found her seat, only a few seconds before the late bell rang and she was pulling out an empty notepad from her book bag when a deep voice interrupted her concentration. 

"Hey," Joy turned around in her desk to identify the voice. It belonged to a young guy, dressed in the classic attire of a high school jock (letterman jacket detailed with excessive badges and other such awards). 

"Hey yourself," Joy replied, mostly uninterested in the preppy student. 

The guy didn't seem fazed by her coldness. "I don't remember seeing you before." He leaned forward, closer to her, and shook his longish, but styled, dark hair out of his eyes. His eyes were an equally dark brown, attractive but somewhat dull. His smile almost seemed strained even though it was clearly, entirely genuine. Even with his deficiency in perfect features, Joy couldn't say he was unattractive when actually, out of all the guys she had seen so far at her new school, he was probably the best looking (or at least in the top five). 

"I'm new," She stated simply. 

"That would explain it," He grinned wider and Joy noticed his perfectly straight and sparkling white teeth. "Are you in my grade?" He quickly corrected himself. "That would be twelfth grade." 

Joy smiled, "That's flattering…I'm only in tenth grade." 

"No way!" he barely glanced up as the teacher entered their classroom. "You look a lot older." He complimented freely and Joy found herself liking his friendly, easy-going personality. 

"Thanks," She felt herself slowly loosening her guarded attitude and opening herself up to the idea of making a friend. 

"I'm Blake, by the way," He continued to ignore the teacher as he began class. 

"Hi Blake," She smiled and turned around in her seat as though she were done with the conversation. 

"Wait a minute," Blake whined and tapped her should repetitively. "Aren't you going to tell me your name?" 

"I'm still deciding." Joy didn't turn around but spoke over her shoulder. "I'm not sure I want to get to know you that well yet." Her retort was flirty and he seemed to like it. She wasn't sure why she was acting so flirtatiously but something about this older guy put her in a strange mood. She enjoyed teasing him. 

The teacher, annoyingly, felt obligated to introduce the new student to the class. "Me gustaría presentar al nuevo estudiante, Joy Peters," He clapped and signaled for the class to join in and they dutifully did so. Joy rolled her eyes at their forced attention. 

Blake whistled loudly and then leaned forward and whispered in her ear. "Joy…I like it." His breath tickled her ear and she giggled and tried to swat him away. 

Joy tried to focus on the class, having so much to catch up on, but Blake was making it impossible for her. Every few minutes he would pass her a note asking her something different about herself. She would hesitate for a moment, scribble down an answer, and return it to him. He learned more about her in that short class period then probably any other student would learn about her for the next few months. Of course, there was certain information which she withheld, mainly the death of her parents. Joy didn't want her new schoolmates to pity her for her loss, she was tougher than that. In order to maintain her brave, "bad-girl" facade, Joy created a life story to give to anyone who wished to know. 

After class Joy planed to move on quickly to her next class, but of course everyone felt it necessary to disrupt her plans. As she passed the front of the room, the teacher stopped her. 

"Señorita Peters," He stood at his desk sorting through the quizzes his students had just turned in. "Si tienes unas preguntas…" 

She stopped him, "Señor Garcias, I know I haven't been in your class all year, but I have already taken three years of Spanish and my dad was…I mean is…he is fluent in the language." She smugly arched an eyebrow. "I doubt I'll have any questions for you," Joy tucked a loose hair behind one ear, revealing her three piercings, two in the lobe and one in the lower cartilage. "No offense." Her smile was sarcastic as she turned determinedly and left the classroom, leaving her teacher stunned by her curt, smartass behavior. 

Only a few minutes after she had reached her locker, Joy was again interrupted, this time by Blake. 

"You seemed in a hurry to get away from me." Blake peered around her locker door with a sly grin. "Was it something I said?" 

Joy rolled her eyes, "I don't want to be late for my next class." 

"For some reason, I just don't get the feeling that you care much about tardiness." He laughed and teasingly traced his finger around the butterfly tattoo on her lower back, visible between the edges of her low-riding jeans and revealing shirt. 

"Blake," Joy jerked away from his touch and glared at him. "Don't be that kind of guy." 

"Excuse me?" Blake frowned at her demand. 

"You know what I mean, Mr. everybody-loves-me-because-I'm-a-senior-jock." She slammed her locker door and stared straight into his confused eyes. "I'm not the kind of girl that'd go for that kind of a guy." 

Blake backed a little away from her. "Joy, I didn't think…" 

"Whatever," Joy started walking away but he followed her so she kept up her lecture. "Just because I've got a pierced naval and a couple of tattoos and tend to avoid school when possible, it doesn't mean that I'm easy." She sped up but he didn't slow down. 

"I never said you were, Joy," Blake was still confused. She was being all defensive and as far as he could figure, he had done nothing to make her that way. 

"You know, just because you're a senior and I'm only a sophomore, it doesn't mean that I'm going to go all ga-ga and throw myself at you." She stopped suddenly and spun around to face him, causing Blake to almost run into her. "So whatever you're expecting from being nice to me, you can just forget about it, okay? I promise you won't get anything from me…" 

"Joy, stop," Blake touched her arm but she glared so he quickly removed his hand. "I don't know what kind of guys you've experienced before, but I promise I'm not interested in that from you. I just thought you were cute, and you seemed cool," He sighed. "I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong idea somehow. I just wanted to get to know you." 

Joy frowned, skeptically, "What's your deal, Blake?" 

"What do you mean?" 

"I mean, why are you interested in me?" Joy started walking again, this time slower so that they could talk more easily. "I'm sure you've got like a fan club of girls that'd love to be with you, so why are you being nice to me? I'm just the new girl, who's at least two years younger than you." 

At that moment a tall, skinny, red-head glided up next to them and tugged at the sleeve of Blake's letterman jacket. "Blake! I've been looking all over for you!" Her red and gold cheerleading skirt swished dangerously high as she almost skipped to keep up with his long strides. 

"I can't talk right now Katie," He pried her fingers off of his jacket and waved her away. 

"Okay!" Her bubbly voice didn't deflate. "I can't wait for the game tonight!" 

"Yep," he sent her on her way and then turned back to Joy whose face portrayed a mocking grimace. 

"I think I proved my point," She started walking faster as they neared her classroom. 

"Look, do you really want to know why I want to get to know you?" 

"Sure, but not now, I've got class," she pointed to the door of her History classroom and gave him a cynical smile. "If you really want to tell me your _feelings_, then you can meet me after school at my locker." 

"Okay," Blake smiled. "I'll be there." 

"I can't wait!" She sighed and left him in the hallway.


	10. Chapter Ten

Chapter Ten: Second Chances

After school, Joy had almost forgotten about Blake's promise to meet her and she would have gladly left immediately after her last boring class of the day, but he was faithful to his word and was waiting patiently for her at her locker.

"What do you want?" Joy pretended to be uninterested in the fact that he was waiting for her when actually she was quite pleased.

"I told you I'd be here," His face displayed his smugness in his smirk.

"Yea, so," Joy opened her locker and began sorting through her books, stuffing a few into her black leather shoulder bag. "I didn't think your type were always that true to their word."

"Okay, I think I've got the point. You don't trust me. My assumption is that you've been burned before and are now too scared to trust any guy that wants to be your friend!" Blake came around to the other side of her locker so that he could look into her eyes. "You'll like me if you would just give me a chance. I'm not all that bad you know."

Joy rolled her eyes and then turned to him with a sarcastic grin. "It's not that I don't trust you, it's just that…you are really annoying!"

"Ouch!" He pulled back in joking offense. "You certainly aren't afraid to speak your mind, huh?"

"What's the point?" Joy slammed her locker shut. "Are we done here?" She started to walk away down the hall.

"Yea, we're done." He watched her walk away and then added to himself, under his breath. "For now." Something about the new girl really interested him. She was doing more than just playing hard to get. She was serious. That bothered him. But it also enticed him. He knew that somehow he would get her to go out with him.

Joy resignedly returned home with an annoying load of catch-up homework, after school. Her Aunt and Uncle had gone out, somewhere; at least that's what she supposed when she found the house empty. _At least there's one thing I can rejoice in!_ She decided with a smirk as she brought her books up to her second-story room and spread out on the bed. Before long, Joy's mind wandered away from her schoolwork and to the memory of her parents; a direction which her thoughts often drifted to these days. Her eyes clouded over with tears and any hope of concentration was gone.

The rest of the week passed swiftly, with no hints of improvement for Joy, but she really didn't care. It surprised her only a little that she received no more unwanted attention from the irritating jock, in fact, she hardly even realized that she hadn't seen him again since she left him at her locker on her first day.

However, her high school isolation did not last. Monday morning, Joy arrived at school late; tardiness was common school behavior for her. She ran through the empty halls, five minutes after the bell had wrung, and stopped at her locker. There she found that a note had been slipped through the slits in the metal and was waiting for her inside the locker. She quickly unfolded the sloppily creased notebook paper and scanned the words. When her eyes skipped to the end and noticed that the note was signed from Blake, she folded it back up with out reading it and stuffed it carelessly into one of her binders before shutting her locker and hurrying onto class.

By lunch she had almost completely forgotten about the unread letter, and things would have been great if Blake hadn't insisted on showing up in person to ensure that she had actually read it.

"Joy!" Blake found her at lunchtime, eating by herself outside, under a tree. "This is pathetic! You're too pretty to eat alone!" He dropped down next to her and took the brown paper bag, which held her lunch, away from her. "You brought your own lunch? That's so cute! Did your mommy write you a note to go with it?"

"God! Why are you such a pain? Do you take pleasure from annoying other people?" Joy grabbed her lunch bag back with a frown. Of course she couldn't say that her mommy was dead.

"I'm sorry," Blake seemed suddenly serious. "I came over here to try and make peace with you and I'm only making things worse. That's why I wrote you the note. It's easier for me to talk with writing. Did you read it?"

Joy suddenly remembered the note she had stored in her binder and shook her head. "Maybe I'll read it later, when I have time." She smirked. "Or if I ever have the need to bore myself with a letter from someone like you."

Blake actually looked a little hurt. "Right, okay, well as good as my intentions were, I've still got my pride, as you have so readily pointed out, and so I'm going to leave now." He stood. "As much as I love your sarcasm, I'm not really in the mood." And he stalked away.

Joy was left alone again. She considered reading the note, but only a minute later she was interrupted again.

"Hey," the voice belonged to the tall, brunette girl whom Joy had bumped into on her first day of school.

"Hi," Joy remembered their odd and abrupt conversation and she started to feel bad about how she had ended it. "It's Dawn right?"

"Yea," Dawn shifted her feet nervously. Her thumbs were hooked in her vacant belt loops and her shoulders were hunched, making her seem shy and insecure. "And you're Joy, right?"

"Yea," Joy bit into her apple. "Did you want something?" She asked a sweetly as she could.

"I know you probably aren't at all interested, but I wanted to apologize." She sat with crossed legs beside Joy. "About the other day, you know, I don't think I was as nice as I could have been."

Joy forced a smile, "I wasn't as nice as I could have been either."

"Then I guess we're even," Dawn forced a slight laugh. "The reason I'm here is because I, well," She seemed to be having a problem explaining herself. "I hate seeing people alone. It makes me sad. I don't have many friends but I do have more than your zero."

"I'm sorry, but is this you apologizing? Because you kind of such at it." Both of the girls smiled at each other.

"Right, I know, I'm not very good at that sort of thing." Dawn blushed, slightly embarrassed. "I guess I was just hoping that you would give me a second chance."

"A second chance?" Joy's smile turned completely genuine. "I don't really think you ever had a first chance." She shrugged. "I'm usually not very good at admitting mistakes, but I was rude to you the other day and for no reason. So I owe you an apology too."

Dawn nodded quickly, "Sure," then she grinned. "And I'll totally forgive you, if you'll forgive me!"

Joy nodded, "Sure."

"Great! Then, do you maybe want to eat lunch with me tomorrow?"

"Sure," Joy nodded again. Dawn seemed sincere. And Joy couldn't spend the entire year eating all alone under the tree. _Why shouldn't I give her a chance?_ She thought as Dawn stood and left with a wave.

That night, Joy had actually taken the time to complete, well at least to start, her homework. She had the best intentions to complete it too, if only she hadn't become sidetracked. As she opened her binder to retrieve her English homework, a folded sheet of paper slipped to the floor. She realized at once that it was the note from Blake and at first thought about ignoring it. But then, she remembered how badly she had misjudged Dawn with a first impression and so she decided to give the guy a chance. She put aside her schoolbooks and opened the note. It read:

_Joy, I know that I didn't make the best impression on you, and in fact all you can probably think about is how annoying I am. I'm so pissed at myself for not handling our first meeting better. The truth is, I was nervous. I get that way sometimes. Nervous I mean. When I want to talk to someone, like say a pretty girl, I can't think of what to say and then nothing comes out right that's how it was with you. I really wanted to talk to you but I wasn't sure how you'd respond and I wasn't sure how to approach you…I guess I didn't exactly go about it the best way, huh? Well, anyway, I really hope you'll forgive me for being such a jerk. I don't blame you if you never want to speak to me again, but please give me a second chance. It would mean the world to me. Like I said, I think you're very pretty, and after passing notes with you all through first block, I think you're pretty nice too. I'd really like to get to know you better and I you give me a chance. Blake. _

It was a good note. Joy couldn't deny that fact. Either Blake really knew the right words to say to a girl or else he was actually a pretty decent guy. She hoped for the latter because she wanted friends. Dawn was cool, and definitely someone Joy could become good friends with, but she wouldn't mind having a guy friend, or maybe more than just a friend eventually. She decided to give Blake a second chance to prove himself.


	11. Chapter Eleven

Chapter Eleven: A Boyfriend and a Bestfriend

Sunnydale High. What a nightmare. For over a month, Joy learned the meaning of 'friendless', or well mostly friendless. She ate lunch with Dawn and Dawn's boyfriend every day, so really she may as well have been alone. It sucked being a third wheel. During classes and through the halls she was doing very well with ignoring the curious glances she received from the other students who seemed determined to make the 'new girl' feel as out of place as humanly possible. It was a miserable life and she hated every minute of it. She was going to a miserable school during the day only to flee it in the afternoon to return to an even more miserable home. Her only freedom from her dismal and dreadful house arrest, so to speak (except without actually being restricted to the house), was when Joy ditched the 'family' dinners, which were nothing more than canned soup or microwave pasta, and drove from one end of the very short town to the other in her beloved car. It took a total of about thirty minutes. And then she drove the length again, twice. She really didn't enjoy being home. Her Aunt and Uncle were insufferable, and she'd rather be out about a town by herself where she knew absolutely no one, then stuck at home with two people who she knew way too well. One good thing was her grades had unusually risen from her usual failing grades she had received at her old school. She blamed her lack of a life. 

Dawn was nice enough during school, but in the afternoons, she was more or less absorbed with her boyfriend. Sure, once in a while there were rare Saturdays where Colin was busy with football and so Dawn had the day free and then would invite Joy to join her for lunch or a day of shopping. These were the days that Joy lived for. She had no life outside of school and home, except for Dawn. Dawn was her outlet. But still, Joy couldn't help feeling lonely and in serious want of some more attention. 

This craving forced Joy into an unthinkable dilemma of finding herself a boyfriend. Which she did. Rather easily actually, considering Blake had more or less continued his random notes in her locker, though he never again bothered her during lunch. He seemed to have learned his lesson there. 

December first was a Friday. Without thinking, Joy had agreed to join Dawn and Colin that night at dinner and a movie. It would inevitably be another third-wheel situation, which she was not at all looking forward to. She was so desperate not to be miserable that night that she acted against her better judgment and called Blake when she got home from school. 

"Joy?" His voice revealed shock when he answered the phone. 

"Okay, so let's just get something straight here," Joy sighed and started rambling. "You obviously like me and I obviously don't like you, but I've been a little bit lonely at school and you've been very persistent, which I have to give you some props for, so…" 

"Joy, what are you talking about?" 

"Don't interrupt!" Joy demanded. "I might change my mind." He was silent. "I'm going out with Dawn and Colin tonight and I am just so sick of going on 'dates' with them that I'm calling you. So do you want to come or not?" 

"On a date? With you?" Blake was obviously surprised that she would be asking him. He didn't even seem offended about her admitting that she didn't like him. "Are you sure?" 

"You've got ten seconds and then I'm hanging up the phone." Joy was becoming very irritated, mostly with herself though for actually calling Blake. He was a jerk. Right? Well, even if he wasn't, Jock so wasn't her type. 

"Okay." He answered finally. 

"Really?" She was almost hoping he'd back down so she wouldn't have to go through with it. 

"Yea really. Where should I meet you?" Joy told him the plans and he promised to be there and then they hung up, leaving Joy completely stunned. _I can't believe I just made myself a date…with him! What was I thinking? God, can I really be that desperate? He better not try and kiss me. _

At six o'clock, Joy parked her car at the café where they were meeting and hurried to the front door nervously. As much as she told herself that she was stupid for inviting Blake, she was actually starting to feel anxious about going out with him. He wasn't that bad looking after all, and she could very possibly get used to his preppy attire. 

"Hey Joy!" Dawn was waiting at the front door with Colin. 

Joy hurried over to them. After a quick glance around she decided that Blake hadn't shown up yet. "Hey guys," Joy hoped that the couple wouldn't mind her bringing a date. Of course they wouldn't. That was just her hoping that they would so that she could send Blake home when he arrived. "Umm…I kind of invited someone." 

"You did? Like a date? Who?" Dawn asked quickly. 

"Well…" She was about to tell them when he arrived. 

"Hey everyone!" Blake, true to character, was wearing jeans and his letterman's jacket. Joy mentally compared her black fishnet stockings and denim mini skirt with his outfit and rolled her eyes. _What was I thinking? We'd never work together! We're way too different! He's such a jock! _"Sorry I'm late." 

"Blake?" Colin grinned. "Wow, I didn't really think…I mean, you and Joy? Wow!" The guys shook hands. She rolled her eyes again. _I should have known they were friends. They both play football together. I'm sure there's been plenty of locker room talk about the 'new girl'! Whatever. I just want to get this night over with. _

Surprisingly, the night was not as dreadful as Joy had imagined it would be. In fact, by the end of the night she found that she had completely misjudged Blake! Throughout the 'date' he was the most perfect gentleman! It was kind of strange actually. He even held open the doors for her! The double date was a strange success! Joy and Blake got along better than either of them had expected and Joy almost thought she could like him, a lot. Even with the exceptionally good time she was having, Joy couldn't get Henri off her mind, and because of that, it was hard for her to completely let loose and enjoy herself. Henri had rudely put a strong damper on any of her possibly future relationships. Then again, what boyfriend-turned-vampire wouldn't have that impact on his ex-girlfriend? 

After a delicious dinner and a relatively boring movie, the couples returned to their cars and prepared to say goodnight. Colin walked Dawn to the passenger side of Joy's covered-convertible (Joy was going to give Dawn a ride home) and they whispered and giggled for a while before kissing their goodbyes. Blake and Joy watched them for a minute and then turned away laughing at their sickening cuteness. 

"Well, tonight was fun," Joy stated simply. She couldn't think of anything better to say at the end of their first date. 

"What? No kiss goodnight?" Blake asked leaning closer to Joy. 

"Blake, it's only the first date!" Joy protested only half-seriously. 

"So, then, when do I get a kiss?" He asked playfully. "On the second date?" 

"That depends," Joy retorted with equal playfulness. 

"On what?" 

"Is there going to be a second date?" She smiled and he grinned and then nodded. 

"I think there's a very good chance," Blake gave her a hug and then opened the car door for her and waited for her to climb in. 

"Goodnight Blake!" Joy blew him a kiss as he closed the door. 

Dawn finished saying goodnight to her boyfriend and then climbed in after Joy. "Tonight was good!" Dawn decided, turning on the radio. 

"Yes it was," Joy agreed. "Thanks for inviting me." 

"No problem," Dawn sighed and turned down the music. "Joy, I really do want to be your friend you know. And I am sorry if I ever seem preoccupied with Colin." 

Joy nodded, "I know Dawn, I completely understand. He's your boyfriend." She was surprised at what she was saying. "Maybe we'll be making this double date thing more…frequent." 

"Good," Dawn smiled. A few minutes later they had arrived at Dawn's house and the girls hugged goodbye before parting. Joy turned up her favorite CD and hummed for the rest of the drive to her own house. 

Joy walked up to the front door with a smile, but as she flipped through her key chain for the house key the front door swung open and her smile disappeared. Her uncle stood tall in the doorway and from the mostly empty vodka bottle in his hand and the swagger in his stance, Joy knew that he had been drinking hard again. It was never good when he had been drinking because it always put him in a horrible and violent mood. Joy knew she didn't have to take the abuse that was sometimes afflicted on her by her enraged uncle, she knew that she was strong enough to defend herself, but she also knew that this was the only family that she had and without them she would inevitably be sent to live in a foster home. And to Joy, a foster home would be worse than any pain she ever endured at the hand of her uncle. 

"Uncle Dale," Joy hesitated, not at all in the mood for what she knew was to come. "I...I didn't mean to stay out so late..." But any amount of her pleading wouldn't be enough with Dale being this intoxicated. Without waiting for any of her excuses, he took hold of her arm and dragged her inside the foyer. 

"Wha...what're ya...doin..." His words slurred together as he threw her body hard against the wall. 

"Uncle Dale, please," Joy moaned as she felt the impact of her back slam into the wall. "I'm sorry, I had a date," she tried to explain but he wasn't in the mood for listening and in seconds his hand had slapped hard across her face. 

"Dates...are _not_...a-allowed..." His voice raised and then quieted at inconstant intervals as he smacked her again. Joy decided that talking was pointless, so she quieted and just took the beatings as usual. 

This wasn't the first time that she had been beat by her uncle. In fact, ever since she had moved in with her aunt and uncle, this process of abuse was becoming quite habitual. Anytime that he had drunken too much he took out all of his frustrations on her. And he had plenty of frustrations living a far-less-than-mediocre life, which had recently been tainted with the arrival of his more-than-perfect sister-in-law's daughter to his household. Eventually, her uncle would grow so tired that he stopped the beatings and would settle down on his armchair where he would quickly fall asleep, leaving Joy to retreat miserably to her room and take care of her fresh cuts and bruises. This night was no different. As soon as Dale tired of the abuse, he retired to the living room and Joy stumbled up the stairs to her bedroom. 

_Ouch..._She stopped in the bathroom on her way to her room to check her new wounds in the mirror. Her left eye had the faint hint of a forming bruise and she knew it would be even worse in the morning. Her lip was cut and she wondered if it was because it had hit something or because she had bitten it, which sometimes happened when her head was jerked around too suddenly. And along with a few minor bruises in the shape on her arm, Joy also had a few slight scratches and cuts wherever the clothing didn't cover her skin. _Just another fun night at home! _Joy sighed and retreated to her bedroom, falling into bed with exhaustion. 

"Joy!" Blake was waiting at her locker early Monday morning. 

"Hey Blake," Joy was tired after her long weekend but she was unexpectedly excited to see Blake. 

"Are you happy to see me?" Blake leaned against the lockers while she retrieved her books for first period. 

Joy laughed softly, "You wish!" Then she reconsidered her choice of harshness and nodded, "Maybe a little." 

He grinned and gently brushed his fingers against her bare arm. "I thought so." His touch made her flinch a little but she forced a smile on her face. 

"Don't push your luck." 

"Alright, I'll be good," He moved away from her slightly, "And I'll be even better on our second date. I promise!" 

"Are we going to have a second date?" Joy asked as she closed her locker and walked beside Blake towards their first period class. 

Blake suddenly seemed nervous, "Only if you want to?" 

"I don't know," Joy thought about dragging it out with Blake but his pleading eyes made her change her mind. He held the classroom door open for her and she entered, "Alright." 

"You really want to?" Blake was ecstatic. "Okay, when? How about this weekend? No, how about tomorrow? Or tonight even?" 

"Blake, slow down," Joy took her seat and he sat in his desk behind her. "I was actually thinking that it would be fun for us to go out in the afternoon, like after school..." 

"Huh?" Blake frowned, "I thought we could go out to dinner and a movie again, like before." 

"Is that really important?" Joy self-consciously adjusted her hair to cover more of her face, afraid that Blake would notice the bruising on her eye. "I just thought it would be fun if we did something earlier." 

But Blake quickly canceled that thought, "I have football after school." 

"Oh, right," Joy sighed. "Well, I guess that we can go out at night, if you really want to." 

"Not if that's going to be your attitude," Blake smugly looked away from her. 

Joy smiled, "I'm sorry, Blake, it's just been a long weekend." 

Blake nodded, "Sure, so are we still going to go out?" 

"Sure, when?" Joy opened her books and tried to act as though a date with Blake were nothing important. 

Dawn joined their conversation at that moment with an announcement. "Colin and I are going out Friday night after the basketball game if you guys wanted to come?" 

"Another double date?" Blake didn't sound so sure but Joy quickly agreed. 

"Another double date would be fun," Joy decided and Blake couldn't argue since he had finally gotten her to agree to a second date.


	12. Chapter Twelve

Chapter Twelve: Kiss and Tell

In less then a month, everything had changed for Joy. She was happy again. She and Blake had made Friday night dates a regular thing, and after the second date they had added in Saturday nights and Sunday afternoons. Joy's uncle still felt it necessary to punish her for coming home so late on the weekends but she didn't even care anymore. Blake was worth it. 

Two days before Christmas, Blake and Colin had planned to take the girls out for an especially fancy dinner to celebrate the holidays. They had been out of school for a week and during that time Blake and Joy had seen each other daily, so by time their special date arrived, they were as close as Dawn and Colin. 

Dawn breezed through the front door of Joy's house. Joy's aunt and uncle had gone to a Christmas party that night and so Joy invited Dawn over so they could get ready for their double date together. 

"I've got a secret," She exclaimed in a sing-song voice. 

"Hello to you too," Joy greeted her sarcastically. 

"Oh yea, hello to you too," Dawn smiled. "But didn't you hear me? Aren't you curious? I've got something majorly exciting to tell you!" Dawn exclaimed again with a bubbly squeak. 

"Okay, what's so exciting?" Joy led Dawn up the stairs to her bedroom. 

"Well, actually, now that I think about it, you probably won't be as excited as I was." Dawn seemed suddenly downhearted. "Oh well, never mind." 

"Dawn, don't do that!" Joy exclaimed. "You can't get me all excited like that and then just dismiss it!" 

"I'm sorry, but it's just that I forgot you don't know my sister so you probably wouldn't be interested," Dawn spoke a little less enthusiastically than before. "I was just so excited when I found out that I wanted to tell someone, but I didn't have anyone to tell other than Colin, but you know guys...anyway, so I thought I could tell you but then I realized that you really wouldn't care either..." 

"Dawn, just tell me." Joy demanded. 

"Okay, so my sister, Buffy," Dawn began, "used to have this really serious boyfriend in college, even though she was only in college for a couple semesters, but anyway, there was this guy," Dawn was already rambling. "His name was Riley and they were the sickest lovey-dovey couple I had ever seen! They were so in love! It was cute, when they weren't being all gross. They were together for like a long time and then he had to leave, suddenly, I'm not really certain on all the details but he had to leave. She didn't want him to though." She took a deep breath and then continued, "And I so knew that she had never gotten over him, even though she claimed that she did, and she was always moping and everything..." 

"Dawn, as much as I love getting the director's cut of your sister's love life," Joy smiled as politely as she could muster. "Are you going to make your point anytime soon?" 

Dawn giggled, "Right, sorry! So, yea, Riley just showed up a last month and he and Buffy were like being all talky and stuff..." another deep breath followed by a high-pitched squeal. "And last night he called her and asked her to go out with him on Christmas Eve!" 

Joy had to smile for her friend's excitement. "That's great Dawn. I bet Buffy is really happy." 

"Oh, she is!" Dawn agreed. "They were up all night on the phone just talking and reminiscing. You have to meet him, he's the sweetest guy!" 

Joy of course wasn't really that interested in Dawn's sister's boyfriend, but she smiled at her friend's enthusiasm just the same. By the time they were ready for their dates, Dawn had gotten Joy's promise to come to the house and meet the 'sweet' Riley. 

The dinner was dull but glamorous. Of course it was exciting to be eating at such a fancy restaurant with a very attractive and considerate guy, but Joy wasn't very interested in finery. She was more entertained by just having a good time. And she was definitely having a good time with Blake. 

After dinner Colin offered to drive Dawn home giving Blake and Joy some alone time to talk. They left their cars parked at the restaurant as they walked the sidewalks, hand in hand. 

"This is fun," Joy decided. "It's been fun, I mean." 

Blake nodded in agreement and squeezed her hand. "Yea, I'm glad you gave me a chance." 

"Yea, me too," Joy smiled and returned the hand squeeze. 

"So, I've been thinking," Blake led her over to a bench resting against the side wall of a building and they sat down. "About us," He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and she rested her head on his shoulder. 

"What about us?" 

"I was thinking about our relationship, and I've decided that I want you to be my girlfriend." He turned to look at her. "But, only if you want to be, of course." 

Joy hesitated. "Blake, you know that I really do like you," She didn't move away from him but she also didn't look at him. "I mean, these last few weeks have been incredibly fun, but..." 

"What's the matter?" Blake was immediately concerned. They had been dating for over a month and as far as he was aware, each of their dates was superb and he couldn't ask for anything better in a relationship. So what was her hesitation for? 

"Nothing's the matter, but, I'm just not so sure about us." Joy sighed. _Why is this so hard for me? I like him! I like him a lot, so why do I have to consider being his girlfriend. It should be an easy answer! _Joy stood up. "I'm sorry Blake. I just need some more time. Please don't be mad. I promise that I do like you, it's " 

"Right, okay," Blake shook his head and stayed seated. "I'm sorry I asked. I didn't think it would be so difficult for you. I guess I was wrong." 

"It's not that," Joy didn't want to lose him. _I should just say 'yes'. There's no reason I shouldn't. I want to be his girlfriend. I really do...damn you Henri! _She knew why she was having a difficult time agreeing to have a relationship with Blake. She couldn't get Henri off of her mind. Their breakup wasn't exactly ideal. "Will you call me tomorrow?" He didn't respond but she hoped he would anyway. "Goodnight, Blake." Joy sadly turned away from him and walked alone back to the parking lot to retrieve her car. 

Blake didn't call Joy the next day though. He didn't call her for a few days actually and Joy didn't bother to call him either. She wanted to though. She wanted to call him and tell him how she really felt. Joy was having doubts about pursuing a relationship with Blake Francis. The idea of starting another serious relationship frightened her as she thought about the conclusion of her last relationship, with Henri. Dawn, however, was insistent on pursuing the idea for Joy. She seemed so sure that Joy and Blake were 'made for each other' and Joy was never in the mood to discuss her reasons with Dawn, so she mostly tried to avoid the topic and just nod whenever Dawn would bring it up. 

Finally, though, after many afternoon shopping trips with Dawn during Christmas break, Dawn could be ignored no longer and she eventually confronted Joy. 

"Joy, I need to talk to you about something." Dawn and Joy had just finished a shopping trip indulging in shoes and were taking a refreshment break for coffee. 

"Go ahead," Joy ordered her cappuccino and waited while Dawn ordered a latte. 

"It's about Blake," Dawn wasn't sure how to bring up the subject, when it would surely sound audacious any way she said it. "I wanted to know...do you like him?" 

Joy sighed, "I do. I like him a lot, Dawn, he's awesome. And he's sweet. And he's very cute!" 

Dawn nodded, "That's for sure. But, you don't seem to be very interested anymore. I mean for this past month you two were almost as inseparable as Colin and me, but it's been almost a week since you've seen him last! That's the longest you two have been apart since you started dating. You know what I mean?" 

Joy nodded, "Yea, well, it's not a big deal." 

"He doesn't think you like him." Dawn told her. "He said so. He really wants you to be his girlfriend, you know. He's afraid you have lost all interest." 

"I do like him, Dawn, it's just..." Joy faltered for the right word. "It's complicated." 

"How so?" Dawn wasn't going to let this subject drop that easily. 

"You wouldn't understand," Joy really wasn't ready to confide in Dawn about her past. "I guess my last boyfriend wasn't that great of an experience." 

"Oh," Dawn sighed deeply. She was obviously curious but wasn't going to just come out and ask, so she waited, impatiently for Joy to offer more information. 

"Henri and I were very serious." Joy realized that she couldn't have good friends if she didn't talk to them, and Dawn was one of those good friends that she wanted to make and to keep, so she relented to telling her one of her dark secrets. "We were in love, I think, I mean I'm not sure I know what love is exactly, but we had serious feelings for each other." She smiled to herself as she remembered all the fun they had together during their short year together. "He was an exchange student from France, so you can imagine his charm!" 

Dawn nodded with a grin. "He sounds perfect, Joy," her face grew suddenly serious. "So, what happened?" 

Tears came to Joy's eyes without warning and she tried to wipe them away without Dawn noticing. "Henri died." 

"Joy, I'm so sorry," Dawn instantly apologized, regretting her prying. 

"Don't be, it's not like it's your fault," Joy tried to shrug off the solemn air that had invaded their merriness. 

"Let's change the subject," Dawn suggested, slowly sipping her drink. "Tell me about your family," She tried a new subject. Poor Dawn, she never was very good at the serious matters. 

"My family?" Joy rolled her eyes, not wanting to discuss the other heavy matter in her life, but she knew that it would have to come out sooner or later. "There's not much to say. My parents are both dead. I live with my aunt and uncle now." 

"God Joy, I'm such a moron!" Dawn shook her head in distress. "I'll understand if you never want to speak to me again! I shouldn't have asked! Buffy always says I am way too curious." As soon as she mentioned her sister, Dawn realized the connection. Giles had said that the new slayer had been through the tragic loss of her parents, just like Joy! If that was just a coincidence, then Dawn was baffled. This new discovery made her very excited and so she quickly changed the subject again. This time she brought up her strange sister. "Joy, I know this might sound a little strange, but I think you should really meet my sister and her friends. I think they could help you!" 

"Help me?" Joy laughed, "Why do you think I need help, Dawn? My boyfriend died, and then my parents died, but I've dealt and I'm fine now. I don't need help. Trust me." 

"That's not the kind of help I mean, Joy." Dawn had no clue how to convince Joy to talk with her sister. It was a weird request, obviously. "I think you'd find my sister and her friends very interesting. And I think that they could explain a lot to you." 

Joy rolled her eyes, "Explain a lot to me? What's that supposed to mean? Look, Dawn, I appreciate how much you want to 'help' me, but I think our friendship would be better if you weren't always trying to 'help' me." And with that, Joy finished her coffee and stood. "I'll talk to you later. I've got to go now. You were going to meet Colin, so you don't need a ride, right?" 

She tried to smile as she waved to Dawn and hurried off towards her car. However, that was hardly the ending of Joy's thoughts. As soon as she was alone and driving towards home, Joy was able to ponder Dawn's strange persistence concerning the matter of her sister. In fact, the thought didn't leave Joy's mind for the entirety of the weekend. Dawn's discussion about Blake didn't leave Joy either. That night she called him. 

"Hey Blake, it's me, Joy." She spoke softly when he answered the phone. 

"Hey." He was quiet and she knew that he wasn't exactly excited to talk to her. 

"I wanted to apologize," This was harder for Joy to call him then she had expected it to be. 

"I'm listening." 

"I was rude the other night. I had a lot on my mind. You wouldn't understand everything that my last boyfriend put me through. I was having trouble making the distinction between the two of you. I'm sorry. I have no right to make you pay for my problems. Will you forgive me?" She said everything in one breath and the waited for him to respond. 

"Joy, you know that I like you and I want you to be my girlfriend, but I also want you to be able to trust me. If you need to talk about anything, then I'm willing to listen." 

Something about the way Blake was speaking, sort of hurried and too casual, made Joy believe he was only offering out of politeness and not out of sincerity. She hadn't expected more though. As nice as he was, he was still just a high school jock who wanted to go out with her. "Thanks," Joy sighed. "I'm fine now though. I talked to Dawn. Anyway, I wanted to answer your question." 

"Really?" Blake sounded hopeful. 

"Yes," Joy smiled into the phone. "My answer is yes." 

"Really?" He asked again, even more hopeful. 

"Yes, really!" 

"So then, you're my girlfriend?" 

"I guess so," Joy laughed quietly. 

"Cool," Blake sounded pleased and Joy was glad she had agreed. So, it was official. They were boyfriend and girlfriend. Joy hoped this relationship would be more successful than the last. She couldn't handle another catastrophic breakup in less than a year. 


	13. Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Thirteen: A Stake and a Spike

New Years Eve was an exciting time for Sunnydale High. There was a dance. It was only a semi-formal but involved as much glamour as a ball would. Even though Joy and Blake were now official, his family was vacationing in Hawaii for the last week before Blake returned to school and so Joy was left with no one to go with. Luckily, this dance wasn't the type of dance where a date was required, and in order to spend yet another night _away_ from her house, Joy decided to go by herself.

The gym had been decorated entirely in the most obnoxious shades of gold and black with the only calming contrast being the white banner hanging above the doorway announcing the holiday. Why the colors were black and gold, Joy could not decide. All of the girls seemed to agree with the color theme because each and every one of them was decked out in flirty little gold or black dresses (most of which had a gaudy covering of sparkles). Joy (never one for following the crowd) showed up in a fairly modest, white dress; the silky material faintly shimmered in the gleam of the multiple spotlights hanging overhead of the gym-turned-dance floor.

It probably wasn't the best idea for an already-lonely student to attend a dance by herself, but Joy was desperate, and she did not want to be at home any more than absolutely necessary. However, just before eleven o'clock, when she had been at the dance for over two hours, Joy realized that she was just being wistful and she decided that she couldn't endure the humiliation of being partner-less for yet, another dance. And so she left.

Wandering from the energetic atmosphere of the gym, Joy meandered through the unusually empty hallways. School was a whole different place at night, when no one was there. Joy found it to be almost comforting and peaceful, but at the same time a little freaky and mysterious, and soon she had escaped the ghostly still halls to the quiet outdoors. After strolling around the emptied yard of the school grounds for a few minutes, Joy decided that she liked being outside even less than being inside. The night was too quiet for her. She was used to being out late in downtown LA where things were always riotous and exciting. She came to the conclusion that Sunnydale was a very dull place.

Those thoughts dissolved in an instant when the night's stillness was suddenly pierced by a frenzied scream. Spinning around Joy ran instinctively to the football field at the back of the gym. There a tall, chain-link fence blocked her. She pressed her face against the fence; her eyes were squinted to see into the darkness. In the distance, she noticed a young girl running fast across the long field with her glimmering gold dress flowing in the breeze. Behind her ran a young guy dressed in the dance-style tuxedo, so Joy decided he had to be her date. Behind them both was an unmistakable Vampire, flashing his sharp teeth threateningly. _Not another one of those bastards! _She rolled her eyes in irritation and began searching for some way around the fence. _What are those idiots doing outside of the dance? And why the hell am I actually going to help them? I don't know them! And I doubt that they've even bothered to say 'hi' to me in the halls...grr...damn my stupid conscience. _With a sigh, Joy linked her fingers through the chain-links and shook the fence furiously with the hope that it wasn't very strong metal, but of course it was. Suddenly, another young girl joined the three in the field. She was running towards the Vampire with some sort of thick stick raised high above her head. _Dawn?_ Joy frowned when she realized that the valiant, young girl was her friend. _What the hell is she thinking? She's going to get herself killed!_ Joy watched in confused horror as Dawn neared the group and leapt on the vicious Vampire, waving her stick wildly as she attempted to tackle him to the ground.

For a very short minute, Joy actually thought that the crazy girl might have a good chance at winning, but then another Vampire appeared, as if out of nowhere, and knocked her to the ground, pinning Dawn's arms above her head. _Dammit!_ Without another angry thought, Joy kicked off her slip-on heels, hooked her fingers on the chain links and scaled the fence with incredible speed and skill! As she dropped to the other side Joy frowned, realizing how easy she had been able to climb the tall fence. Another scream reminded her why she had attempted the great feat in the first place and she took off running towards the bravely struggling girl.

When Joy joined the battle, the petrified couple had all but disappeared through the open back door of the gym. "Wimps!" Joy shouted towards them, not really caring whether or not they actually heard her. A second later, she had been noticed by one of the Vampire's and was thrown off her feet. She tumbled to the ground with a startled shriek.

Dawn craned her neck to see who had joined her and gasped. "What are you doing her?"

"I thought you could use some help?" Joy kicked hard at the Vampire that was coming towards her, sending him flying backwards.

"I'm fine. I can handle this by myself!" Dawn wiggled her hands free from the Vampire's strong grip and crawled away from him. She didn't get far before the creature had pounced on top of her. Her hands hit the ground hard to lessen the impact with her face.

"Sure, whatever," Joy rolled her eyes at her stubborn friend and quickly came to her aid. With a swift kick the Vampire on top of Dawn rolled away and lay stunned for a moment on the grass.

"Look, Joy, you really don't know what you're getting into!" Dawn tried to explain but Joy's first attacker chose to retaliate at that moment and kicked Joy hard in the back. She bent forward from the sudden pain but caught herself before she fell to her knees.

"I'm sorry, but I think I know a little bit more about this than you do!" Joy exclaimed spinning around and punching the beast hard in the face. His head swung back and Joy took that moment to knee him in the gut. He fell back onto the ground. The other Vampire, who had been curiously watching Joy's excellent fighting skills, now lunged at her and knocked her onto the ground. They wrestled seriously while Dawn tried to fight with the injured one, but even with his slight beatings he was much stronger than Dawn could every try to be and within seconds he had her knocked down with a hard blow. Dawn whimpered from the pain in her jaw and when she felt her lips with her fingers she found blood. Joy had managed to plant a hard blow to the Vampire she was fighting, just at the bridge of his nose and it was taking him a minute to recover, so she turned to assist Dawn. Before she had a chance, a strangely handsome man with bleached-blonde hair joined them. He dove perfectly on top of the Vampire, with his long, leather duster flying behind him, and maneuvered the danger away from Dawn. Joy was momentarily too surprised to think correctly, but her opponent had recovered now and so she was forced to resume the fight.

The next few moments blurred and her awareness seemed to disappear as she mechanically fought the violent fiend who was attacking her mercilessly. Just as she was ducking from a furious jump-kick, she heard the heroic stranger shouting orders out at Dawn.

"Get out of here Dawn!" His voice revealed a British-type accent. It was attractive, but, Joy was too preoccupied to be concerned with the details of a stranger's voice.

"What about her?" Dawn jumped to her feet but only backed up slightly. The bleached-blonde glanced towards Joy just in time to see her kick at the Vampire's legs, causing the rather bulky, un-dead creature to buckle and collapse on the ground.

"She seems to be doing bloody well for herself." Joy fixed her foot on the Vampire's neck, just under his chin and she turned to Dawn.

"Are you going to use that or is it your substitute hand purse?" She nodded towards the stake, still secure in Dawn's hand. Dawn seemed startled at the question but obligingly tossed the stick to Joy who caught it expertly in her left hand. "Thank you," Joy bent down and stabbed the wood deep into the Vampire's chest and he disintegrated expectedly. Straightening up, very satisfied with herself, Joy turned just in time to see the other Vampire being dusted by the stranger.

"So..." Dawn turned to Joy with a forced little giggle. "That was bizarre, huh?"

Joy shrugged, "Yea, sure," and she brushed the Vampire's ashes off of her dress. "See ya." She turned to leave, not really wanting to have to explain how she knew so much about the creepy species of evil, but then she realized that Dawn and her strange, attractive friend had to know something as well, since they didn't act startled at all when they were faced with the frightening creatures, so she paused. "Umm...Dawn..." Joy turned back to the two who were staring at her very peculiarly.

"Uh-huh," Dawn's blue eyes were wide and uncertain. "Umm...Joy...I know this is strange..."

"Actually..." Joy sighed and hesitated.

"That was an impressive fight, Joy." Dawn complimented.

"Impressive?" The handsome man at Dawn's side let out a slight laugh. "She was bloody incredible."

Joy shrugged, "Thanks. You were pretty good too." She smiled.

Now that the fight was over, Joy was able to inspect the stranger. He was definitely good looking, that she had already decided with just one glance. Upon closer, and rather enjoyable, inspection, she noticed his charming, brown eyes, model-like, sunken cheeks, very-kissable, pouty lips..._wow, okay, I should stop letting my mind roam. I don't even know his name. And he looks old, much older than me...but oh god, he's hot!_ Joy blinked quickly trying to drag her attention away from the attractive man in front of her and back to Dawn. "So, Dawn..."

"Yea," Dawn seemed just as unsure as Joy as to where to begin in the conversation they would inevitably have to have about the creatures they were just battling.

"You seemed to know what you were doing there, luv. Staked many Vamps have you?" The attractive man with the deep and handsome voice smirked.

"Staked?" Joy bit her lip in slight puzzlement. "Oh, you mean the stake and the chest and the dust thing? Yea, a few, I guess." She didn't elaborate on any of her previous fights and they didn't pry. "What about you? You seemed to be pretty sure of yourself in the fight."

"Well, I've had my share of the big bads." He motioned towards her shoulder. "You're bleeding."

Joy glanced down and rolled her eyes. "Yea, it's just a scratch. I don't think it's fair for them to use their teeth as weapons. It's like they've got these permanent knives, just waiting to strike..." She was rambling and they were staring and she felt suddenly stupid and naïve. "So, this whole Vampire crashing the dance thing...that's not a reoccurring event is it?" She didn't know what else to say, but something was necessary to break the awkward tension. They only laughed in a sarcastic response. "Okay, great!" Joy replied, equally sarcastic.

The handsome guy turned to Dawn. Concern showed clearly in his eyes and Joy wondered what their relationship was. "Dawn, you're hurt." He took her hand away from her mouth, revealing a swollen lip, and a nose leaking blood.

"I'm fine, Spike, stop treating me like I can't take care of myself!" Dawn pulled away in annoyance. _Spike? That's a funny name! _Joy thought to herself, unconsciously grinning.

"Hey, don't start up with me!" He took hold of her arm and at his touch, Dawn winced. "Dawn, you're hurt, alright, stop being all bloody grown-up!" He held up her arm for inspection and in the gleam of the football-field lights he could see some slight bruising forming on her arm. "Oh bloody hell, the slayer's going to kill me."

"She won't either," Dawn assured him. "At the very most there will be some slight beating and some possible threatening and in the end probably some very heavy bruise-age, but I highly doubt there will be any real killing! She needs you too much. You're like her bodyguard. You're her slaying-bodyguard-buddy!" Dawn had a goofy little giggle, even after going through a serious, well semi-serious, life-threatening event.

"And on that encouraging note..." The handsome man with the strange name shook his head with a sigh.

After that long ramble from Dawn and Spike's contemplative frown, Joy felt out of place and confused, so she decided it would be best for her to leave. "Well, it's been swell, and now I'm going to go! I'll talk to you later, Dawn." Joy waved curtly and headed back towards the fence, where her shoes were still waiting on the other side. She glanced back to Dawn and Spike who were staring at her. Spike's eyes were a dark, clear brown and they were fixated on her. Joy couldn't take her eyes off of him but as she started to pick up her pace, she tripped on absolutely nothing and fell forward onto her knees. She blushed, instantly embarrassed and quickly stood up, refusing to look back at the two who were undoubtedly laughing at her klutziness.

Dawn nudged Spike with meaningful eyes as they watched the girl leave. "Well? We can't just let her go!" She exclaimed in a loud whisper.

"What? Why not?" Spike replied, much louder than a whisper.

"Spike, she just slayed a Vampire without even blinking. Don't you think that's kind of strange, you know, like our type of strange?" Dawn was emphatic and her voice rose in urgency as Joy neared the fence.

"What's that suppose to mean?" Spike watched the young blonde as she repeated the climb over the fence, this time leaving the field.

"I've never seen anyone fight like that, except for Buffy and Faith, well and you, but you don't count because well, you know, you're bad." Dawn's eyes almost crossed in bewilderment. "Well, I guess Faith was bad too, so I'm not sure that counts, but, well, she fights almost as good as Buffy! And I know for a fact that Joy has recently lost both of her parents!" Joy had reached the other side and was retrieving her shoes. Dawn nudged Spike again. "Come on, Spike! You can't let her get away!"

"Why's it got to be me? Why am I always the one to deal with the out-of-the-ordinary?" He may have been whining, quite unmanly, but in truth he was quite interested in figuring out more about the strange, strong, and very beautiful girl.

"Fine, I'll go stop her." Dawn put on her most grown up face and started strutting after Joy. Somehow, though, at some point in her battle with the Vampire, pre-Spike, her ankle had been hurt and now she as she walked with a slight limp.

"Hold on there princess, I'll go get her, and then we're getting you home, and then you're sister can wring my neck!" And with that Spike headed towards the fence, trying to reach Joy before she left.

Joy brushed the last remains of dust off her dress and reached up curiously to figure out the condition of her hair, which she had spent so long pinning up in fancy twists before the dance. The pins had loosened and a few were missing so that some pieces of her hair were now hanging sloppily about her face and down her back. She spun around as she heard Spike calling her name.

He had reached the fence. "It is Joy, right?"

"Yes," Joy nodded. "And you're, Spike?" She considered questioning as to his peculiar name but then thought better of it. Instead she just waited for him to explain why he had run halfway across the expansive football field to ask her if he had his name right. He didn't explain. "Did you want something, Spike?"

"Yea, uh, well," Spike hesitated because he wasn't really clear on Dawn's sudden brainwave to stop the girl. Now that he had succeeded on that mission, he wasn't sure what he was supposed to do with her. "Hold for a minute, would you?" He turned back to Dawn and shouted to her, "What did you want her for, Dawn?"

Dawn shook her head and ran towards them, calling out when she was still a few feet away. "Joy, would you like to come home with us?"

"Us?" Joy glanced back and forth between Dawn and Spike. "You two...live together?"

"What – oh God – oh bloody hell no!" Spike sputtered out with a nervous head shake.

Dawn giggled again, "No, Spike doesn't live with me, he's just a good friend, of my sister."

"Wait," Joy jumped back to Dawn's earlier question before she become troubled with the thought of a high school student living with such a handsome man who was obviously so much older than high school. "Why are you inviting me back to your house?"

"You're hurt, and you're pretty good with the pointy stick-in-the-heart maneuver." Dawn explained.

"Yea, so," Joy frowned and pulled her cell phone out of her purse to see the digital clock. "It's almost midnight."

Spike jumped into the conversation. "You know something about Vampire's, luv, and that's got us interested! I think it'd be good for you to meet Dawn's big sis."

"Why?" Joy thought back to when Dawn had invited Joy to come home and meet her sister before, when Joy had told Dawn about all the dark secrets of her past.

"I think she'd like to talk to you," Dawn offered. "You know, what with the Vampire's and the slayage..."

"I'm confused," Joy shifted her weight onto one foot. "What is 'slayage' exactly?"

Dawn frowned and then shook her head, "That's so not the point. Anyway, please come home with us. I am very certain that my sister would love to meet you. And she's so cool! You'd love her!" She plastered an un-forced silly grin on her face and then switched it to a pout. "Please, just come and meet her."

"I really don't understand why you want to introduce me to your sister," Joy was thoroughly confused. First of all, Dawn had told Joy before to talk with her sister, for help. And now she was practically insisting on Joy's coming over to her house, late at night, to meet her family..._strange girl._ Joy decided with a relenting shrug. "Whatever." She was too confused to argue with them so she agreed.

"Okay, then, umm, Spike how'd you get here?" Dawn turned to him suddenly.

"I walked." He stated simply.

"Oh right, of course." Dawn smiled, "Then let's get going. I want to hurry and be home." She started limping towards the gate at the end of the long gate nearest to the gym. Spike hurried after her.

"Dawn, you can't walk all the way home with a limp."

Joy waited for them to join her on the other side of the gate. "Umm, you know, we could drive."

"Sure, if I had some sort of wheels other than my bike, which I don't even have right now." Spike sighed.

"Actually, I was talking about my car." Joy said.

"You've got a car?" Spike sounded surprised. "Well Dawn, I think you're new friend's cooler than you."

"Shut up!" Dawn pretended to pout while hobbling along behind Joy who was now leading the way to the parking lot. "It's not my fault that Buffy doesn't trust me to drive!"

"Oh, and I suppose it's not your fault that you all but demolished Buffy's car?" Spike pointed out and Dawn glared. He noticed Dawn was still limping and so he came to her side and offered his assistance by looping his arm behind her waist and letting her lean on him.

"I have one minor run-in with the garage door and suddenly I'm not allowed to drive anymore!" Dawn muttered under her breath, gratefully leaning on Spike for balance.

"I'm still slightly confused...no scratch that, I'm completely confused about this all." Joy continued to ramble while unlocking the car and motioning for them to get in. "Why exactly am I meeting your sister? And what does she have to do with Vampires?" Before she shifted the car into reverse, Joy turned around to look at Spike who was in the back seat. "And what were you doing walking around by our school, at night?"

Dawn turned too, "That's actually a very good question. Why were you walking out by my school, Spike?" Spike cleared his throat nervously as though he had been caught doing something he shouldn't.

"Umm...well...that's a good question..."

"Spike," Dawn's voice was accusing.

"Ah, come on niblet!" Spike half-smiled, "You know that big sis's worried about you, especially with her history of dances and all!"

Dawn rolled her eyes and turned back to face the front. "Whatever," She folded her arms across her chest. "I'm so sick of everyone treating me like a child." She mumbled under her breath as Joy speedily backed out of her parking space and sped out of the lot. "Buffy's just got to mind her own business sometimes." She spoke louder for Spike's benefit.

"Yea, well, you be sure and tell her so when we get you home, alright? But, for now–" Spike cut off suddenly and then raised his voice in an outrage that almost made Joy jerk the wheel. "Oh bloody hell! The damn wet field got mud on my coat!"

Glancing in the rearview mirror, Joy noticed the angry British blonde removing his long duster and inspecting it for dirt-damage. She had to snicker. _Strange guy...strange people actually. I don't know what the deal is with Dawn and her sister, but I guess anything's better than going back to that dance...or home. Besides, I want answers. ___


	14. Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fourteen: The Strange Gang

Following Dawn's directions, Joy soon pulled up out front of a quaint, little house only a few minutes drive from the school. She was surprised to find all of the lights out in the house. 

"Is your sister asleep?" Joy turned off the car and waited for instructions. 

"No way, she's hardly ever asleep before sunrise..." With this Dawn clammed up and climbed out of the car. "Never mind, let's go and see!" she ran up to the front door and began to knock. "Buffy! I forgot my key, let me in!" She called through the thick door, ringing the doorbell sporadically. 

Joy wasn't sure whether or not she should follow but then Spike pushed forward the passenger seat and climbed out and so she quickly followed. 

"Where's your key?" Spike asked Dawn, joining her at the door. Joy stopped behind them on the narrow, front porch. 

"I left it in my purse which I left at the dance." Dawn explained, still pounding on the door. 

"I don't think she's home, Dawn." Spike decided as he peered through the windows next to the door, into the dark entryway. "Where's the damn slayer when you need her?" he sighed and turned back to the car. 

"Giles!" Dawn exclaimed suddenly. "They're probably having one of their boring meetings over at Giles's place." She turned to Joy. "Could I borrow your cell phone?" 

"Sure," Joy withdrew the phone from her purse and handed it to Dawn, waiting patiently but in confusion. 

"Hello, Giles?" Dawn spoke into the phone while Spike and Joy stood aside, staring at each other candidly. "Is Buffy there? Yea, well the dance was...exciting. Anyway, there's something I wanted to talk to you guys about, umm, someone actually. Yea, I think you'll be _very_ interested." Dawn glanced towards Joy with a sly grin on her face. "Okay, well keep her there for a while longer then...oh really? Fine, whatever...we'll be right there." Dawn hung up the phone and handed it back to Joy. "Thanks," then she turned to Spike. "The gang's at Giles's. They're having a meeting, of course, about the newest terror or whatever! Anyway, they're going to wait there for us." And she turned back to Joy. "I'm so sorry, but my sister's somewhere else. Would you mind driving us over there?" 

Joy glanced at the clock on her cell phone before replacing it in her purse. "I guess, but I really should be going home soon." 

"Okay, but I really want you to meet my sister." Dawn waited for Spike to return to the back seat before climbing into the passenger seat again. 

Joy took her place behind the wheel. "Okay, but I can't stay too long. Seriously, I have to go home." Joy started the engine and followed Dawn's directions to the new location. A house she labeled as 'Giles's'. 

When they arrived, Joy began to feel nervous, yet anxiously excited at the same time. The way Dawn and Spike were talking about Dawn's sister and vampires, she figured that these strangers she was about to meet could very possibly hold the key to all the questions that had been pestering her mind ever since Mrs. Kentucky died. Or they could just be a bunch of crazy people. But whoever they were there had to be some substantial reason for Dawn to be bringing her there, so she obediently, but somewhat apprehensively, followed the mysterious girl to the front door. 

Dawn knocked quickly and then tried the doorknob, and finding the door unlocked she pushed it open. "Hello?" Her ankle faltered as she stepped through the doorway and Spike was at her side in an instant to help her keep her balance. 

As Joy followed them through the doorway, she noticed a group of people sitting about on couches and chairs in the living room, just past the entryway. They must have been in a pretty deep discussion because no one even acknowledged Dawn's greeting. There was a young woman standing, with her back to the door, and speaking emphatically, using hand motions in exaggeration. She had honey-blonde hair and looked to be barely older than twenty. She seemed to be in charge and her serious voice tone made Joy curious as to their conversation topic. 

Spike half-carried Dawn over to the group, bringing their talking to a sudden halt when they noticed the girl's condition. Since the drive over, her lips had severely grown in size and even though the blood had dried from her nose, it still looked gruesome, and there was her limp to top it all off. 

The blonde instantly grew furious. "God, how could you Spike? I give you one simple job to do and you let something like this happen! All I asked was that you watch and protect my sister, is that really too difficult for you?" 

"Buffy," Dawn tried to assuage her sister's vehemence. "It wasn't Spike's fault!" 

"Yea, Buffy, listen to your lil' sis," Spike brought Dawn to the couch and a pretty, red-head scooted over to make room for her. "It's not always my fault you know! You're always so ready to blame Spike. Why's it always got to be me? Why don't you blame little miss bloody grown-up over here for once? It's usually her that's getting herself into trouble, not me." He stopped ranting and stared at Buffy for more of her scolding. 

"Dawn?" Buffy turned to her sister for confirmation. "What were you doing?" 

"Umm...nothing," Dawn cowered away from her sister's accusatory glare. "I was fighting, sort of." 

"Sort of?" Buffy waited for more explanation. 

"Well, yea, I was trying to fight, and I would have been fine if they hadn't shown up!" At this she nodded towards Spike and then at Joy who was still standing, unconfidently, by the door. She felt strange being so unsure, since usually her confidence level was higher than any normal person's should be at her age. 

"Dawn, who's she?" Buffy asked suddenly. "Why didn't you tell us that we weren't alone?" She lowered her voice so that only those closest to her could hear. "We've been talking about evil and stuff!" 

Spike didn't bother to lower his voice, "Don't fret about her luv, I think the Gidget's quite aware of evil." 

Joy frowned, "Hey, I am standing right here thank you, and my hearing is not yet equivalent to that of a ninety-year-old!" 

"Spike, what are you talking about?" the red-head stood and stared at the newcomer. 

Suddenly, Joy felt as though everyone was staring at her and that's because everyone was. The room full of people had instantly turned their eyes upon her like hungry vultures ready to feed, except without the vicious hunger aspect. She felt obligated to say something, but nothing was coming to her mind. _Say something! _She ordered herself in vain. _Anything! Say hi, or introduce yourself, or god comment on the weather! _Their eyes were becoming horribly penetrating and she felt a blush creeping up her neck and into her cheeks. _Speak dammit! _She commanded herself but still no words came. 

"Giles," Dawn spoke first. "I...or we actually..." she wanted to include Spike in this statement so that she wouldn't be the one to blame in case she was wrong. "We think that she's the one." 

"The one?" Buffy and Giles replied together. 

"Yea, you know, _the_ one," Dawn moved her hands excitedly. "The one we've been looking for!" 

She didn't understand why they weren't picking up on her meaning and Joy didn't have a clue what they were talking about and for a minute she felt like fleeing from the room and away from the staring strangers. 

"Giles, m-maybe we shouldn't be talking about this in front of her..." Tara suggested softly. 

"Why not? The child's already blabbed enough anyway," Anya, Xander's overly-frank ex-fiancée exclaimed, "what'd be the harm in letting the stranger hear all about our exciting lives fighting demons and stuff!" 

"Anya," Giles spoke firmly. 

"What?" She rolled her eyes and slouched back on the couch. 

"I'm not a child," Dawn whined under her breath. 

Joy had been progressively backing up towards the door and was preparing to exit when Spike spoke up. "Hey fellas, aren't you forgetting something?" He nodded towards the attempting escapee and they all silenced. 

The young blonde, who Joy had decided was Dawn's sister, stepped forwards. "Umm...hey...sorry about all this," she seemed unsure as to what to say to the stranger but her smile was sweet and friendly. "You're probably pretty confused right now, huh?" 

Joy nodded, "Yea, you know what, I think I'm just going to go. I'm sorry about all this hassle, and Dawn thanks for trying to help or whatever...but this night has already been too long and if I'm any later for curfew..." she paused realizing that she didn't want these strangers to think of her as a little girl with a bedtime. "It was nice meeting you all, or well whatever." She turned to Spike. "Thanks for helping tonight. You're a pretty good fighter..." She forced a smile. "Goodbye." And she started to open the door. 

Spike nodded, "You're not too bad yourself." 

"Sure," She waved to the group and ducked out the door. 

Dawn turned back pleadingly to the group. "Please, guys don't let her go! I swear she's special, she's the new slayer!" 

"Dawn, please," Buffy rolled her eyes in irritation with her younger sister. 

"She's bloody good with a stake, Buffy," Spike added suddenly. 

"See," Dawn looked up excitedly, "Spike agrees!" 

"Hold on there niblet," Spike shook his head. "I'm not saying one way or the other on this slayer deal, but she's not half bad with fighting." 

Buffy sighed and looked to Giles, "It's your call." She relented her role of authority to her old watcher. 

Giles shook her head, "How are we suppose to know if she is truly the slayer or not?" No one had any suggestions on this question so he shrugged. "Well, if she is in fact the girl we're looking for, then I imagine it would be a tragedy if we let her leave." 

Dawn squealed happily, proud of herself for finding the girl, and started to stand. "I'll go get her!" 

"Stay there Dawn, you're hurt," Buffy glared pointedly at Spike. 

"I suppose I'll go and fetch her then," Spike headed for the door, while the others waited nervously, hoping that she really was the one, and hoping even more so that she hadn't left yet. 

Joy had luckily had some trouble with her car keys and was just climbing into the car when Spike stopped her. "Look, I'm sorry to disappoint you all, but I've really got to go!" Joy shut her car door and started the engine. 

Spike hurried over to the car and tapped on her window. "Come on luv," He spoke loudly until she rolled down the car window. "I know the blokes come off as a bit mental, but they're pretty decent as far as people go," He leaned on the door, bringing his face close to hers. "And as strange as it may sound, they're telling the truth." 

Joy sighed and with no better response coming to her mind she simply retorted on his insistent nickname for anybody he talked to. "I don't know you, like at all," She rolled the window halfway up. "So, I think it's kind of weird for you to be calling me names appropriate for a girlfriend or a puppy." She smiled sarcastically and rolled the window up all the way before shifting the car into reverse and backing out of the driveway at full speed. 

"Spike, where is she?" Dawn twisted her neck around as Spike returned to the crowded living room. 

"She's gone." He stated simply. "And before you go and get all cross, Slayer, it's not my fault." He frowned at Buffy and stalked over to the couch where he sat next to Dawn. "So what's the consensus? She the new slayer?" 

"Well, Dawn's been telling us how she fought off two vamps before you came and then she staked one all by herself!" Buffy explained the current status of their debate. "But still, we're not sure if that qualifies her as slayer-material." 

"Don't forget about her family 'tragedy'!" Dawn piped in. 

"So, how're we going to decide exactly?" Xander asked. 

"I think we're going to need to trust Dawnie on this one" Willow pointed out as she retrieved some bandages from the kitchen and then returned to clean up the cuts on Dawn's face. 

"Yea, I kind of think Wil's right." Xander agreed. "Dawn knows her pretty well and if she really thinks that this girl is the new slayer..." 

Buffy shrugged. "I guess we don't really have any better leads." She turned to Giles. "What do you say?" 

Giles fiercely rubbed at his glasses with a handkerchief. "Buffy, I believe that your sister may be right. Everything that we know so far about this young girl seems to point her towards being the slayer. Perhaps we should let her have a go." 

"Yea, okay, whatever you say. Dawn, you'll need to keep working on her, because right now she doesn't seem to be too interested in being a slayer." Buffy decided and Dawn nodded in agreement. "Goodnight guys, we're going home." She gathered her jacket from the couch and threw the group a smile. 

"See ya!" Dawn stood and followed her sister obediently. "Thanks Spike," She grinned, "you saved my life...again." 

"Yea, well, someone's got to keep a watch on you, lil' bit." He fixed his arm around her waist to help her stay balanced and walked outside with the Summer Sisters. Dawn was too thankful for Spike's constant protection to mind his annoying nicknames for her.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Fifteen: Tainted Friendship

"Good morning, Joy!" Dawn greeted cheerily the following Monday morning. She had been waiting at the possible-slayer's locker before first period. 

"What do you want?" As good as a friend as Dawn was, Joy had had a very long weekend and was in no mood for a visit from the world of bizarre and crazy. 

"I wanted to apologize actually," Dawn noticed a bluish tint around Joy's eye, but it had the look of an attempt of makeup cover-up. "Ouch, is that from the Vampires the other night?" She pointed to Joy's eyes. 

Joy frowned and glanced in the mirror mounted inside her locker. "Oh, yea, I guess." Her tone was short and unconvincing but Dawn didn't press the matter since she needed to 'persuade' Joy into believing in her possible destiny. "Dawn, what do you want?" 

"Well, like I said, I just wanted to apologize about the other night. I shouldn't have...well...let's just say I got a little too excited. I mean, you were an amazing fighter!" Dawn felt that Joy was quickly losing interest and so she hurriedly tried to grab her attention. "What did you think of Spike?" 

Joy peered around the locker, "Huh?" 

Dawn didn't really think about what she was saying. "Spike, the guy you met the other night..." She started rambling. "He's attractive isn't he? You know he was very interested in you. He's a pretty cool guy. I think you'd like him if you got to know him..." 

"Dawn," Joy cut her off. "Umm...remember Blake? My boyfriend? Yea, we're kind of serious in the whole exclusive stage. I'm not interested in anyone else at the moment, thank you!" 

"Okay, so that's a good point, but I don't think that's the important issue right now," Dawn flipped her long, honey-brown hair over one shoulder. "What's important is that I'm sorry, and I really want you to forgive me." She waited for Joy to look at least slightly interested again. "Are we still friends?" 

Joy nodded. "Of course Dawn. You're the only friend I have in Sunnydale." 

"Good, then let's do something tonight." Dawn had instantly returned to her naturally bubbly behavior. "How about a girl's night, like dinner and a movie?" 

"I have homework." Joy realized what she had said and almost smiled. A couple of months ago the thought of actually doing homework would never have crossed her mind, but something had changed in her since her parents had died. In only a matter of weeks at Sunnydale High she had raised her grades higher than she had ever managed to have them before. She had not only been doing her homework but she had also been achieving high grades on her tests. It was a strange feeling for her to actually care about her scholastics. She blamed her lack of a life. 

"Couldn't you do your homework after our movie?" Dawn begged. 

"I'd rather not procrastinate. We'll have our night some other time, okay?" Joy stopped at the door to her first period class. 

Dawn nodded. "Okay, some other time." And then she waved to Joy as she continued on to her own class. 

The next morning, Dawn was waiting for Joy at her locker again. "So, I thought about it last night and I think we should both blow off our boyfriends this weekend and spend the weekend together. We've both been too preoccupied with the guys lately and haven't had enough girl time lately." Dawn announced. "And before you think of an excuse...we'll go out Saturday night so you can do all your homework on Friday. Will that satisfy you?" 

Joy thought about trying to think of an excuse. She was still having a difficult time excepting her friendship with Dawn after the awkward visit with Dawn's sister and her friends. She couldn't think of an excuse fast enough. "Okay, fine, you win. But I have to ask you one favor before." 

"Anything!" Dawn agreed. 

"I don't want to hear another word about your sister or her friends or their 'fight against evil', okay?" Joy slammed her locker and waited for Dawn's promise. 

After only a moment of hesitation, Dawn nodded. "I promise. I won't even mention the vamps you fought the other night, okay? It'll be as if it never happened! We are going to go back to being just friends!" She giggled that crazy, airy giggle of hers and walked away down the hall in search of her boyfriend. Of course Dawn had no intent to drop the subject, since it was her goal to convince Joy of her destiny. 

_She's so weird. _Joy watched Dawn melt into the throng of students who were scurrying about to their various classes. _Even so though, I'm glad she's my friend. _

Saturday night, Joy drove to pick her up, because of Dawn's lack of license. They were going to an Italian restaurant which Dawn promised had the best pasta (Joy's favorite food). Joy had somewhat reluctantly agreed to pick up Dawn, because she wasn't especially excited to venture to that house where she would possibly run-in to Dawn's strange sister. However, in the end, Dawn persuaded her. 

"Hey, are you ready?" Joy asked hurriedly when Dawn answered the front door. 

"Yea, I've just got to find my shoes and then I'll be all set." Dawn left the door open and started to run up the stairs. "You can come in you know," She yelled back as she noticed Joy waiting outside, nervously fidgeting with the split ends on her long hair. 

"Umm..." Joy started to reply but Dawn had already disappeared up the stairs and around the corner of the hallway. "Okay," Joy stepped through the doorway and closed the door. Now, she felt very uncomfortable. She hadn't even wanted to come over here because of the awkwardness of the other night, and now she was inside the weirdo's lair. Joy wished Dawn would hurry. 

Dawn was calling to someone upstairs now, "Willow, have you seen my new brown clogs?" someone replied, but Joy couldn't hear what the answer was. "Okay, then can I borrow your boots?" another muffled reply and then Dawn's bubbly voice, "thanks!" And she bounded back down the stairs. "All set," Glancing in the mirror hanging on the wall by the front door, Dawn adjusted the thin headband holding back her hair and then turned around with a satisfied smile. 

Joy wasted no time in exiting the house and heading back to the safety of her own car. Not that the house was dangerous, it was just uncomfortable for Joy. She wasn't sure why, but for some reason she had a feeling that it shouldn't be as awkward to her as it was. In fact, she felt that she would be quite safe in the house, and probably very comfortable. 

The entire night, Dawn was perfectly considerable about Joy's request to not discuss the matter of vampires. However, even though Dawn was kind not to mention the matter, Joy sensed that it was on Dawn's mind for most of the night. It was on Joy's mind too. Her simple friendship with Dawn had been tainted by the seriousness of existing evil. Whenever Joy spent any time with Dawn she found herself thinking about the dance night when they fought the vampires. She couldn't get it off of her mind. In fact, even after she had returned Dawn to her house and gone on to her own, the thoughts didn't leave Joy's mind. They didn't leave her mind for the entirety of the weekend, either. 

By Monday, she had come to the conclusion that she wanted to meet Buffy Summers, again. Her reason being that she was simply curious as to the 'answers' that she might hold. If the Summers girls and their friends were so familiar on the art of fighting vampires, then they just might be able to explain the mystery of the creatures to Joy and also why they seemed to turn up everywhere she went.


	16. Chapter Sixteen

  


Chapter Sixteen: Answers...at Last

"Dawn," Joy parked her car in the Summers' driveway after school on Monday. Joy had offered to drive Dawn home since the guys had afternoon practice for football. "I made a decision." 

"About what?" Dawn gathered up her books and began to climb out of the car. 

"I think I want to meet your sister." 

"You do?" Dawn was excited. "That's great! Come in now and meet her! Willow and Tara are probably home too." Dawn waited for Joy to turn off the ignition and then giddily led the way to the front door. 

"Wait," Joy hesitated as Dawn prepared to open the front door. "Are you sure that your sister's going to want to meet me? You know, I probably didn't make the best impression last time we met." 

"I'm Positive!" Dawn took Joy by the wrist and led her into the house. "Buffy, Willow, Tara," She hollered out as she brought Joy into the living room. "Come down here please!" She motioned to one of the couches. "Go ahead and sit down." 

Joy sat gingerly on the edge of the sofa against the window and waited as footsteps on the stairs alerted the approach of the rest of the household. Soon Buffy appeared at the foot of the steps, followed immediately by the redhead and a dark-haired guy. "Where's everyone else?" Dawn pouted when she realized that the house was mostly empty. 

"Tara's got a class," the redhead spoke up. Her eyes never left Joy on the couch. 

"Anya's at the Magic Box," the dark-haired man replied. 

Buffy shrugged, "I don't keep tabs on Riley, you know. He's free to do whatever he wants. It's not like he's my boyfriend anymore or anything, and just because he's back, it doesn't change anything..." 

"Buff, I don't think she was asking for a monologue," He winked at Dawn. "Were ya Dawnster?" 

Dawn looked confused but she ignored her sister's ranting. "So, look who's here." She pointed to Joy who was now beginning to wonder about what she had gotten herself into. 

The redhead wandered over to the couch to greet the stranger. "I'm Willow," she introduced herself sweetly and Joy knew at once that she was a very friendly person. 

"I'm Joy," she replied. 

The dark-haired guy stepped forward next, "You can call me Xander." He grinned. 

"What's your name?" Joy asked. 

"Xander," He didn't seem to understand the question. 

"Okay," She smiled. He seemed nice as well as amusing. "And you're Dawn's sister, Buffy, right?" 

The blonde nodded, "Yea," and then she turned to her sister and lowered her voice. "Can I talk to you for a minute...alone?" 

Dawn knew better than to protest so she obediently followed her sister across the hall into the kitchen. Willow went with them while Xander stayed behind to keep Joy entertained. 

"So," He was quiet for a moment as though trying to come up with some way to occupy the guest until the girls returned. Suddenly he spoke up. "Do you like finger puppets?" He found a pen on the side table and began drawing little faces on each of his fingers. 

Joy tried hard not to laugh. "Umm, no offense Xander, but I'm a little old for finger puppets." 

"Ah, no way, no one's too old for finger puppets!" He wiggled his drawn-on fingers for a minute before he realized her tight-lips trying to hold back her laughter. "Oh come on, you couldn't be too old to laugh, you're all of what, fifteen?" 

Joy rolled her eyes, "I'm almost seventeen, thank you very much!" 

"Oh god, you're ancient!" He rolled his eyes, "I think we better start planning your funeral!" 

"Shut up!" Joy felt as though she were sitting around, joking with an old friend, not with a stranger whom she had just met. 

The girls returned soon and Buffy put on her most official sounding voice. "Joy, Dawn has just been telling us in more detail about the fighting skills you displayed when fighting the vampires at the dance," She began, perching on the arm of the chair across from Joy's couch. 

"Okay," Joy didn't really know what this young woman expected her to say. Joy was only here because in her gut she felt that Dawn may have a serious reason for wanting her here, and so she came, to listen to what her friend's older sister might have to say. Beyond that, the listening, she didn't have much else in mind. 

"Have you ever fought vampires before that night?" Buffy asked. 

Joy sighed, "Yes." 

Willow had wandered out of the room and now returned with a phone in her hand. She whispered something to Buffy and then sat down in the chair. Buffy gave an affirming nod to whatever her friend had told her. 

"Is fighting vampires a reoccurring thing with you?" Buffy kept asking questions which Joy didn't really feel necessary and so she continued to answer them simply. 

"I guess, lately anyway," Joy glanced at the wall clock and worried about how late she would be getting home. 

"Have you dusted all that you have fought?" 

Now Joy was getting annoyed. She hadn't expected to be brought here for a bizarre interrogation on her dealings with the undead. "Look, I'm here because Dawn wouldn't stop begging me, but I really don't understand why you're so curious about the creatures that I have killed!" 

"I'm sorry, Joy," Dawn spoke up suddenly. "I didn't think that Buffy's questions would bother you so badly. I just thought you'd like to know that you're not the only one who's had fights with ugly evil things!" 

"Well, duh! I didn't think I was the only one! God, it's not like I think I'm superwoman or something just because I staked a couple vamps! I don't see why you're making such a big deal out of it." Joy stood suddenly. "You know what, this is just a waste of time and I've got to go now..." 

"No, please, not yet," Buffy stood too. "Just stay for a little longer. I don't think you quite understand how unusual it is to be able to slay a vampire as easily as you did." 

"Slay?" Joy smirked. "I wasn't aware there was a special lingo for killing the bloodsuckers!" 

Xander laughed and then quickly silenced when he noticed Buffy's and Willow's disapproving glares. 

"There's someone I want you to talk to, Joy," Buffy explained. "I think he will be able to answer more of your questions then I could. He's so much better with the teach-age!" A knock on the door arrived in perfect timing and Willow rushed to answer it. 

"In there," Her voice could still be heard from the entryway and a second later she came back into the living room, followed by the older man Joy had seen at the house on the dance night. "This is Giles." Willow introduced. 

Dawn whispered her own explanation, "We were at his house the other night." 

"Is it her?" He asked Buffy, not even acknowledging Joy's presence yet. 

"We're not sure," Buffy shrugged and took her seat. "I'm getting the impression that she's not exactly anxious to be 'chosen'." Joy puzzled at the conversation passing between the two. 

"Hello, Joy," Giles had a very proper English accent. "You must be confused as to our strong desire to meet with you." 

"Oh no, that thought never even crossed my mind," Joy rolled her eyes sarcastically. 

"Very good," He removed his glasses and cleaned them with a handkerchief from his tweed jacket pocket. "I have heard that you have some experience with vampires. Is this true?" 

"If you loonies are just going to be repeating the same questions over and over, I really think I could occupy my valuable time better elsewhere." Joy was still standing and now she began to walk towards the door. 

"How did your parents die, Joy?" His words froze her in her tracks. 

Spinning around, Joy glared accusingly at Dawn. "God, is my life just an open book that you feel free to flaunt to your friends? I thought I could trust you, Dawn!" 

Dawn's eyes widened in alarm, "But, Joy I didn't tell him!" She shook her head emphatically. "I told my sister, but she needed to know, trust me! Please Joy, don't leave." 

But Joy was already out of the living room with her hand on the doorknob. When she opened the door she was greeted by a rather tall and attractive man. His handsome face was lit up by a friendly grin. 

"Hey, are you the new slayer?" 

Joy lowered her bright eyes into slits. "What the hell is going on here?" She stormed back into the living room, being followed by the new visitor. "Who are you people, and why am I here?" She demanded. 

The new guy looked apologetic, "I guess you haven't told her yet?" 

Buffy smiled at the handsome man and ignored his rhetorical question. "I wasn't expecting you today, Riley." 

"Yea, I know, but I was bored so I figured, hey why not go see Buffy," He glanced around the room, "And everyone else." Then his smile disappeared and he got suddenly serious, "Tell me Spike isn't here!" 

"He's taking a nap in Buffy's room," Xander offered with a grin. Riley started to fume but Buffy quickly interjected. 

"Stop it Xander," Turning to Riley she shook her head. "Spike isn't here. I promise." 

Even with all her feelings of confusion and anger, Joy was strangely curious as to the newcomer, whom Dawn had informed her earlier was Buffy's old boyfriend. She was also interested in the past connection between the ex-couple and the handsome blonde she had met a couple weeks ago. Joy was certain that they had some sort of past and not a good one, judging by Riley's grave face. 

A minute later Joy was wondering what had provoked her to speak her next sentence and she decided it was her way of 'getting back' at these crazy people. But once it was out she couldn't take it back. "So, why the tension? Did your girlfriend screw around with the hot British guy behind your back?" Joy laughed at her comment, thinking that it would just come off as a joke but it evoked a rather startling response. 

"What? No! I mean..." Buffy stuttered out. "Have you been talking to Spike? You know he always lies! You can't believe a word he says!" She kept rambling. "And I wasn't screwing around behind Riley's back! It was way after Riley was gone...and it wasn't like that..." 

Finally she had to pause for a breath and Willow came to her side to quiet her. "Buffy, I don't think she meant anything by it." The redhead assured the panicked blonde. 

Joy's eyes widened as she realized what Buffy had just confessed to. _Wow! Buffy and the hot guy were together? Hmm...she's lucky. _Joy frowned at the thoughts going through her head about the very attractive man she had only met once and tried to push them away. "I'm sorry Buffy," She felt it necessary to apologize to the psycho woman who had finally leashed in her ranting rage. 

"Don't worry about it," Buffy cleared her throat and tried to recover from the awkward subject. 

"Okay, so now that I've totally put this meeting in a funk, let's talk about the whole 'slayer' thing." Joy finally returned to the couch and sat, a little reluctantly, but ready to receive whatever information these people could give her. She figured she owed them that much after angering Buffy like she did. Everyone who had been unusually quiet during the irritable conversation brought up by Joy and pointed towards Buffy, now looked to Giles for an explanation. And so he began. 

"In every generation there is a chosen one," His voice was slow and deliberate like a sermon being recited at a funeral or a christening. "She alone will stand against the vampires, the demons, and the forces of darkness. She is the slayer." When he finished his oration all Joy could do was stare with her mouth slightly ajar. He realized she wasn't going to respond so he continued. "Joy, we believe that you are that chosen one, well two actually," He nodded towards Buffy, "She is sort of the first, in a while I suppose. At least she has been for a few years." 

"So you're saying that I-" Joy had a hard time finishing her sentence but everyone else wasted no time in jumping in to complete her obvious thoughts. 

"Uh-huh," Dawn grinned. 

"Chosen..." Joy's thoughts dropped off again. 

"Yep," Xander picked up her thoughts perfectly. 

"You're a vampire slayer!" Buffy summarized Giles's long speech into a simple statement. 

"No shit!" Joy couldn't think of anything better to say to express her confused feelings at that moment. 

When Joy finally left the bizarre world of evil-fighters, she wasn't exactly convinced that she was who they said she was. Buffy and Giles had sounded so convinced that she was this 'chosen one' or 'slayer' that she felt like believing them, but when she was alone to really consider what they had been telling her, she wasn't so certain. The concept of one girl to battle the world of evil seemed very unrealistic. So far Joy had fought a few vampires but she had no proof of other demonic creatures actually existing. 

She had let the strange people give her their speeches and their opinions and then they had let her leave to ponder what they had told her. She promised Dawn that she would call later, but as Joy parked her car in the driveway, she was becoming a little wary of meeting with Dawn or her friend's again.


	17. Chapter Seventeen

  


Chapter Seventeen: Aid of an Angel

A week passed and Dawn had considerately given Joy her desired space. Dawn didn't even confront Joy on her distance after learning of her existence as a slayer. Dawn understood that it would be difficult for Joy to accept her identity. While Joy had discontinued her daily lunches with Dawn, she had been spending even more time with Blake. They had not only kept up their weekly, Friday night dates (Joy had decided that the dates were worth her uncle's anger and she refused to stop just because of some inflicted bruises), but Joy and Blake had also begun to eat lunch together every day and Joy had gotten in the habit of doing her homework at school while Blake attended basketball practice and then they would meet up for an after-school trip to coffee. 

"Hey, I thought you couldn't wait for me today." Blake grinned as he jogged over to Joy after practice. She was waiting by the door to the locker room. 

"I couldn't. I had to run a few errands for my aunt, but I decided to stop by on my way home." Joy explained with a smile. 

"Ah, how sweet," Blake circled his arms around her waist and leaned down to kiss her. 

Pulling away from him she pretended to be disgusted. "You're all sweaty!" She turned her head but he leaned closer and pecked at her cheek and neck. Giggling, Joy turned back to accept his kisses, doing her best to ignore his sweatiness as she wrapped her arms tightly around his neck. 

"I better hit the showers then," He broke the embrace and headed towards the locker rooms. 

"Wait," Joy hurried after him. "I've got to go, so kiss me again before I do!" 

Blake grinned and started to return to her but just then his coach and a few of the teammates started heading towards the locker rooms and he changed his mind. "I'll see you later, okay?" 

"Blake!" Joy frowned as he started to join his friends. "No kiss?" 

He just grinned and shook his head. "Some other time," He said simply and then followed the team into the locker room, leaving Joy disappointed and confused. 

_Whatever, I'll see him later. _And she left the gym and headed out to her car. She had a couple more errands to run before heading home so she drove in the direction of the dry cleaners to pick up her aunt's clothes. 

By time she was finished with all her errands it was late, almost nine o'clock. At her last stop, the pharmacy, Joy had to park out back in the vacant parking lot, dwelling in dark shadows with only a single streetlamp which flickered randomly, to illuminate the area. Joy had been having an especially difficult time with her aunt and uncle lately since she had been going out so often with Blake and was so often coming home late, and so being able to stay out late without consequences, even running errands, was a relief to her. As she was walking back to her car, Joy was lost deep in her thoughts and didn't even notice the stealthy, night creatures that were slowly approaching her from behind. A moment later she was caught off her guard and was knocked to the ground by a vampire's fierce kick. 

"What the hell?" Her hands broke her fall as they smacked hard against the pavement. The short skirt she was wearing left her knees bare and they scraped the rough ground and started to bleed instantly. Looking back over her shoulder, Joy realized what had knocked her down and scowled. "Not you guys! I am so sick of you undead bastards!" She quickly stood and turned to face the group of vampires approaching her. The first one leapt towards her with his teeth clearly barred but Joy managed to duck from his attack and in the process she punched him hard in the stomach and then shoved him off to the side of her. Before the second vampire lunged at her Joy firmly made up her mind. "I'm not going to fight you guys. I'm going to go and get in my car and drive away and you are going to leave me the hell alone. Got it? Good." Joy rolled her eyes at the confused looking vampires and started heading back to her car. 

"Who do you think you're talking to, bitch?" One of the vampires growled as she turned her back to them. "You're death isn't a negotiation." 

"Ooh, that's threatening!" Joy replied sarcastically without turning around. She fumbled for the right key to open her car door, but another vampire grabbed her arm fiercely making her drop her keys. He twisted her arm around to her back forcing her to bend backwards awkwardly and somewhat painfully. "Hey, now that's just not fair play!" Joy maneuvered out of the vampire's grip. "I told you that I don't want to fight! I'm not in the mood and I'm going to be late for curfew and then that would just lead me to trouble and…" She paused to punch the vampire that was in her face. Before she had a chance to defend herself again, three more vampires crowded in and at the same time pounced on her, pinning her to the ground; she was more or less in a state of helplessness. She could fend of three vampires at the same time, even with her strength. They overpowered her. 

"Not so chatty now, are you?" One of the beasts mocked her, leaning in dangerously close to her neck. 

Joy struggled to break free from the vampires' restraining hold on her but two more joined the struggle, making it impossible for Joy free herself. She started worrying. It was very unlike her to worry but when she realized that there was a possibility that these creatures could overpower her, she began to panic. She fought furiously but it only helped a little. Her frantic struggling made it more difficult for them to bite her but they only tightened their hold on her. 

She had begun to panic when suddenly the vampires were pulled off of her. She leapt to her feet just in time to see a man fighting all five of the vampires at once! He was incredible! His fighting skill was amazing, and his strength was obvious! In a few minutes and after only minimal struggle, he had dusted each and every one of the vampires. Joy could only stare with her eyes wide. 

"Are you okay?" The man came over to her when he was done with the fight. 

"Yea," Joy was still staring at him in disbelief. "You were…amazing!" 

He didn't seem impressed by her flattery. "You could be too you know." He brushed the remains of dust off of his black button-up shirt. He looked dressed up enough for a dinner party. 

"What's that supposed to mean? If you hadn't come along when you did, I'd have been a much paler person." She tried to smile but the stranger's unusually calm composure halted her jokes. 

"You don't give yourself enough credit, Slayer." The corners of his mouth slightly twitched upwards when he addressed Joy as a slayer. 

"Excuse me?" Joy gasped. "Why did you call me that?" 

"I know who you are." He stated. "You are the slayer. And it's time you started acting like it." He turned and started to walk away. "Next time you get attacked, I might not be here to protect you. You'll have to save yourself." 

"Wait!" Joy hurried after him. "I am not the slayer! I don't know whom you've been talking to, or how you found me for that matter, but I am not the slayer. I am just a high school student, trying not to fail my classes! I want nothing to do with this slayer business, got it?" 

"It's not really up to you." He looked at her seriously. "It's your destiny." He turned away again and started walking. "See you around." 

"Who are you?" Joy called after him. 

"Think of me as your guardian angel." He winked at her over his shoulder and disappeared into the dark shadows of night. 

Joy headed back to her car in confusion. "Weirdo." She whispered into the void, glancing around quickly to make sure that the stranger was gone before climbing into her car and driving home.


	18. Chapter Eighteen

_A/N: I am so sorry that I haven't updated now for quite a while. Usually I am very faithful about updating frequently. Unfortunately I have been way too busy to write lately with schoolwork, midterms, and after school play practice. Hopefully I will have more time now that midterms are over. I hope this update is good. Please review and be patient with me while I try and update again! Thanks!_

Chapter Eighteen: Rocky Romance

"Hey Blake, what're you up to?" Joy was waiting for her boyfriend the following Monday at his locker, before first period.

"Not much," He offered her a brief half smile before turning to his locker to retrieve his books.

"How was your weekend?" She asked weakly. Joy had an unnerving feeling that something was not quite right with Blake. Well, actually, not so much with Blake, as with their relationship. It had been almost three weeks since they had last gone out on a date and he rarely spent any time with her during lunches. She couldn't even remember the last time they had a real kiss.

"Good."

"Okay..." Joy tried to think of something to say. "Do you have any plans after school today? Because, I'd really like to do something with you. I feel like we haven't talked in forever!"

"I've got practice, remember?" Blake answered as he closed his locker and started walking towards class.

"Right, of course," Joy sighed. "Well, I'd really like to hang out sometime soon, if you ever have any free time."

"Yea, well let's try to work something out, sometime." Blake shrugged nonchalantly. "Whenever." He entered the classroom.

"Wait!" Joy followed him. "Is that it? I mean, that's all you have to say?"

Blake looked at her casually. "I don't get it? Did you want me to say something else?"

"No, I guess not," Joy wanted to tell him her thoughts. She always used to be able to tell him everything that was on her mind, but now she felt uncomfortable around him and wanted to hide her feelings from him. They no longer had the close relationship they used to. She let him turn away again. "I just miss you." She whispered under her breath in disappointment.

"Is everything okay, Joy?" Blake asked without much interest in his question.

"Yea," Joy sighed. "Actually no." She glanced at the clock and noticed that class was about to start. "I need to talk to you."

"Okay, well, we'll talk some other time, sweetie." Blake gave her his most practiced smile of smug reassurance and settled into his desk, twisting around to talk to one of his football friends sitting next to him. Joy sighed and dropped into her own desk, deciding that she'd make him listen to her one day.

Things became progressively worse. Blake continued to fill his time with every small activity, and it seemed as if he was just attempting to preoccupy himself in order to avoid spending time with Joy. She knew their relationship was fading. She didn't know why though. As far as she could figure, she had done nothing wrong! Nothing at all to break up their previously perfect relationship. They had seemed ideal. Since Henri, Joy had been miserable until she had met Blake. He had made her happy again and she cared about him a lot now. She didn't want to consider the possibility of losing him, but she couldn't ignore reality.

"Colin, could I talk to you for a minute?" Joy nervously confronted Blake's best friend at lunch on Friday. She silently rejoiced that Dawn was nowhere around. Ever since the day that Joy had been introduced to the concept of evil existing, Joy had been successful in avoiding any confrontation with Dawn. In a way, Joy was depressed with the thought of losing her only friend, but at the same time she was somewhat afraid of Dawn's other friends. They were strange, and their theories were absurd. So, for the time being, Joy felt more comfortable apart from Dawn.

"Hey Joy, what's up?" Colin greeted Joy with a grin. "I haven't seen much of you lately."

"Yea, I know..." Joy glanced around the crowded cafeteria; her eyes were on alert for any sign of Dawn. "I needed to ask you something."

"Okay, shoot." Colin skillfully balanced his loaded food tray on one hand and pulled out a chair with his other.

"It's about Blake." Joy watched Colin's eyes steadily, to see if he would betray anything with his expression. He didn't and so she continued. "Has he mentioned anything about me to you lately?"

"Anything about you? Like what?" Colin started eating his lunch while Joy sat down in the empty chair next to him.

"I don't know," Joy hesitated. "Has he mentioned anyone else, besides me?" She noticed Colin's confused stare and so she tried to explain. "Colin, be honest, do you know if Blake has another girlfriend?"

Colin seemed to almost choke on his big gulp of milk. "Another girlfriend? Joy you're kidding right? You know Blake wouldn't do that! He's totally into you!" Colin was rambling a sentence together and he seemed very bent on persuading Joy. For some reason she had a difficult time believing him.

"I know that Blake and I have had a great relationship, but lately..." She sighed. "I don't know he just seems so different. He seems distracted."

"No Joy, don't even think that! I know that things have been strained between you guys lately, but..."

"Wait, you've noticed that? I thought it was just me being paranoid! But, you're noticing it too, and that must mean that you've talked to Blake and that he's noticed it too! I knew it! Colin, has he told you that he was going to break up with me?" Joy started panicking.

"Joy, I can honestly say that Blake has never mentioned breaking up with you, and as far as I know, he has no desire to do so." Colin stared into her eyes to achieve her full attention. "I know he likes you."

Joy frowned. Colin seemed so certain of himself, but she could not believe him completely. Things were definitely strange between her and Blake and she couldn't help feeling that things were not going to last between them. It was better for her to face that fact than to live with the false allusion of a happy ever after.

Surprisingly, only a few days after the conversation with Colin, Blake began paying more attention to Joy. At first, it was only minimal hallway conversations and brief kisses at lunch, but then eventually, he started taking her out on frequent dates again. Everything seemed suddenly back to normal. Joy couldn't figure him out.

"You're coming to the game tonight, aren't you sweetie?" Blake asked Joy as they ate lunch together outside on Friday. They ate alone, as they always did. They used to eat with Dawn and Colin. They had never eaten with anyone else. Sometimes Joy wondered why Blake didn't introduce her to more of his friends. He had so many. He was one of the most popular guys in the school. He seemed to know everybody and everybody seemed to love him. Since things had been getting better between them, Joy had decided to push all her nervous feelings aside and to just enjoy the relationship that she had regained with her boyfriend.

"Well, I hadn't planned on it." Joy replied. She noticed Blake's frown and quickly elaborated. "You know I'm not a huge fan of sports. That's your thing. But if you want me to I'll come. I'll come for you."

Blake shrugged. "I don't want to force you to. You know my sports mean a lot to me, but it's cool if you'd rather not participate in the part of my life..."

"Okay, okay, you can stop, I get the picture, Blake." Joy rolled her eyes. "Thanks for the guilt trip. I'll come and be your little cheerleader at the game tonight, since it's so important to you..." She stopped when she realized that he was laughing. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing!" Blake kept laughing. "It's just that, you said you were going to be my cheerleader. I think that's funny!"

"Why is that so funny?"

"Well, no offense sweetie, but I just don't really see you as the cheerleader type." Blake explained.

"Oh," Joy didn't find it as funny as he obviously did. "Am I not pretty enough or something? Or am I not stupid enough?"

"It's not that, Joy! God! You're so paranoid." Blake laughed. "I just don't see you as part of the cheerleading crowd."

"Oh, so I'm not popular enough, is that it?" Joy's voice was steadily increasing. Luckily, there were few other people outside during lunch because the weather had been unusually cold. Joy didn't mind the cold though, she actually enjoyed it. "You know, it's not like I couldn't be popular if I wanted to be. I could strut around in adorable pink sundresses with cherry-flavored lip gloss and giggle at the ridiculous jokes all you jocks make and flirt endlessly and..."

"Sweetie, calm down, I don't realize why you're making such a big deal out of this. I was just saying that..."

"I'm not good enough for you am I?" Joy sighed. "I never have been."

"What are you talking about?" Blake tried to calm his ranting girlfriend. "How did this conversation get here? I just asked if you were coming to the game tonight!"

"Whatever, maybe I will and maybe I won't." Joy had riled herself up so much she couldn't imagine having a calm conversation now. She stood abruptly and sighed. "I'll see you later." She gathered up her trash and stormed away from Blake.

After her tiff with Blake, Joy felt as if her entire world was crumbling around her. She didn't know what to think about anything anymore. Her aunt and uncle continued to ignore her other than random violence whenever she managed to piss them off. She had lost her only friend because of a tale of a 'prophecy' in which she is some super hero chick, which if nothing else, freaked her out. And now, on top of everything else, she seemed to be losing her boyfriend!

_Being a teenager sucks, _Joy decided as she dropped her books on the back seat of her car after school. _Being a teenager without friends sucks even worse. _She climbed into the driver's seat in one of the worst moods she had ever been in. _Why did I let myself believe that Blake actually liked me? He's a jock. Not only a jock, but one of the best in the whole school! He could have any girl he wanted, so why did I ever think that he would seriously pick me. I was just something new for him to play with until he got bored..._Joy sped out of the parking lot. She tried to stop her negative thoughts, deciding that they would only destroy her sanity. But by the end of the weekend Joy had come to the conclusion that something needed to be done to change her currently pathetic life.


	19. Chapter Nineteen

_A/N: Okay, I know I'm taking a while to bring in the Scoobies, but I swear just wait maybe two more chapters and I'll bring them in! I'm just trying to set up Joy's life right now, but starting the next chapter, she will become involved with the slayer. Please review!!_

Chapter Nineteen: Three Cheers for Changes

The following Monday, Joy had arrived at a decision which she felt would alter the boring and pointless path her life was currently taking. It was a bold action, but she was determined that her plan would work.

"Joy? What are you doing here?" Collin asked when he ran into Joy after school in the gym.

"Umm...nothing..." Joy didn't know how to answer. She didn't feel like explaining everything to Collin when she wasn't even sure of everything herself yet.

He eyed the advertising banners hanging above the door and made a face. "Cheerleading tryouts. Are you serious?" He laughed. "Joy Peters, you're not really going to try out for the cheerleading team, are you?" Again he laughed.

With a frown, Joy replied. "And why shouldn't I? I think I'd be a great cheerleader!" She glared at him. "Stop laughing at me, Collin. Why does everyone think that my trying out for the cheer team is so funny?"

"Who else have you told?" Collin followed her over to the bleachers at the side of the gym. The gym was crowded with people, most were lounging about the bleachers to watch the tryouts, but there were also quite a few girls on the gym floor preparing to humiliate themselves in front of their audience. There was a table set up in front of all the bleachers where the three cheer captain sat with two of her head cheerleaders. They looked condemningly at each of the new girls, making sure that everyone knew who was in charge.

"I haven't actually told anyone else, but I mentioned it to Blake and he seemed to think it was a pretty ridiculous idea." Joy glanced at the table of cheerleaders nervously.

"So, why exactly are you doing this?" Collin asked her.

She shook her head. "You wouldn't understand. It's just something I have to do."

"Well, good luck then," Collin found himself a seat on the front row of bleachers and smiled at Joy encouragingly as she made her way to the sign-up table.

"Can I help you?" The cheerleading captain, Summer, questioned sarcastically when Joy approached the table. Her thinly-plucked eyebrows raised automatically when she spoke.

"I'm here for tryouts." Joy stated with as much snobbery as she could manage.

The three cheerleaders behind the table scrutinized Joy openly. The redheaded Carrie finally spoke up. "You do realize that these are cheerleading tryouts, right?"

Joy rolled her eyes. "Look, I know I might not exactly strike you as the ultimate peppy Suzy-high school, but I do want to tryout, and you can't not let me just because you don't like me."

The girls again stared at her as if they were trying to figure out a way to keep her from trying out. They obviously couldn't come up with an excuse fast enough. "Okay, it's your choice. I hope you don't embarrass easily." Summer handed Joy the sign up sheet. "Good luck." She smiled bitterly and handed Joy a pair of pom-poms.

"Thanks." Joy spat out with disdain and joined the other auditioning girls. She quickly scanned the crowd on the bleachers and smiled in relief to see that Blake was not there. Collin was sitting where she had left him with his arms folded across her chest.

The tryouts began slowly. The head cheerleaders would shout out random commands, instructing the auditioners to perform various simple jumps and splits, and they all would follow the demands without hesitation. Joy followed the instructions too. She wasn't as excited as the other auditioners, but she obeyed nonetheless. Almost two hours later, auditions ended.

Summer stood up to make an announcement before dismissing the girls. "Thank you all for auditioning, unfortunately we only have open spaces for five new cheerleaders and so only about half of you will be accepted. The list will be posted tomorrow after school." Summer flipped her bleached-blonde hair over her shoulder and led her posse of cheerleaders out of the gym, leaving the exhausted auditioners to stare after her with a hopefully blank gaze.

Joy shrugged carelessly and headed over to the bleachers where Collin was waiting for her. "Well, how did I do?"

"Good enough I guess, I'm not exactly a pro, but if it were up to me, I'd choose you." Collin smiled. "I still don't understand why you want to be a cheerleader. You've never exactly seemed like the kind of girl to care about that sort of thing..." Collin noticed her irritated expression and stopped talking. "Never mind, you did great and I'm glad that you've taken an interest in school spirit." He followed her out of the gym.

"Yea, whatever," Joy rolled her eyes. She wouldn't exactly call it school spirit, but she didn't want to explain that to Collin. He wouldn't understand. No matter how nice he was, he was still just a jock. "I'm going home, thanks for all your support and shit. See ya." Joy practiced a peppy cheerleader wave, ending it with an overly sarcastic wink. Collin shook his head and let her leave.

"Joy, wait up," Blake caught up with his girlfriend the next day after school just as she was leaving her locker.

"What do you want, Blake?" Joy glanced over her shoulder briefly and then continued down the hallway.

"I heard you tried out for the cheer team." Blake grabbed her arm but she shrugged him off.

"Yea, so?"

"What possessed you to try out? It's not exactly your cup of tea you know." Blake continued to follow her.

Joy stopped suddenly and spun around to face her nagging boyfriend. "Blake, stop putting me in a box. If you gave me a chance for once, I might be able to surprise you. Besides, this cheerleading thing is something I want to do...for me." Joy turned away again. "It has nothing to do with you."

"Fine, I'll let it go, for now anyway." Blake kept up with her long, determined strides. "Well, since you've tried out now and everything, you've got to at least go and look at the list. Summer just posted it." Joy hesitated. "Come on, I'll go with you." He took her hand and pulled her through the crowded hallways to the bulletin where the cheerleader's list had been posted. Joy gave up trying to resist him and let him lead her.

When they arrived, it was impossible to get close enough to see the list because of all the girls grouped around it. Eventually the crowd began to disperse. Some girls turned away with their eyes full of glee and joyful tears while other girls, the ones who had been rejected, turned away in pitiful fits of mournful distress. Joy almost laughed. Everyone was taking it so seriously. Joy honestly couldn't care whether or not she made it onto the team. She only tried out to make a point.

"I'll check the list for you!" Blake shoved his way through the crowd of girls until he was close enough to read the list. Joy waited impatiently for him to return. He seemed to be drawing it out just to torture her. When he returned his face showed surprise. "You made it."

Joy's eyes widened. "Are you serious?" She frowned. "I really didn't think that I would. I mean...I wasn't exactly Summer's number one choice, and I'm definitely not cheerleader material." When she had decided to tryout, Joy hadn't exactly realized what she was getting herself into. Now that she had actually made the team and it wasn't just an idea anymore, she wasn't sure that she could go through with it.

"Yea, I know, but you did make it. Congratulations." Blake hugged her. "Think about how great it will be! You will be at all my games and you'll be cheering me on from the sidelines. And people won't just be watching me anymore, they'll be watching you too!" He kissed her cheek. "Hey, you want to go out tonight?"

Joy frowned. "Really? Don't you have practice?"

"Yea, but how about after practice?" Blake explained. "You'll probably have practice too now, so we'll meet afterwards and go out to dinner or something, sound good babe?"

Joy shrugged. "Okay, I'll see you after practice." Joy turned away from Blake and headed towards the gym where the new cheerleaders were supposed to meet. _Why does he suddenly want to go out with me? I mean, I know we've been going out a lot lately, but still...he's never seemed anxious to meet me after practice. Usually, he'd go out with the guys. _Joy sighed as the depressing thought, which she knew was most likely true, entered her head. _Now that I'm part of the in-crowd Blake isn't embarrassed of me. _


	20. Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty: Persuasion

Cheerleading practice. It was everything Joy had anticipated and so much more. It was worse in ways and better in some. In a way, the cheerleading team was sort of like a miniature high school in itself. Every after school practice was the same. Gossiping. Criticizing. Competing. Sure, the girls were civil under the watch of their coach but there were always the whispers. Joy unfortunately, received the greatest expanse of whispered jabs. The girls made it clear to Joy that she was not welcome in their group. Obviously she expected to feel out of place, but she had hoped that once she became a part of the team, the other cheerleaders would at least begin to accept her. Her days were getting redundant. Nothing was exciting her anymore. After school she would go to practice, then to dinner with Blake, and then home where she would receive almost an hour of verbal and sometimes physical abuse from her aunt and uncle who were constantly disapproving her after school activities.

"Yes, Aunt Jo. I know I'm running late, but..." Joy spoke as calmly as possible into her cell phone after practice on Wednesday. Practice had gone over fifteen minutes and then Blake had taken her out for coffee. She had promised her aunt and uncle she would be home by six o'clock, but now it was quarter after and she wasn't home yet. "Please...I'll be home soon...I have to make a quick stop...I promise I'll be home soon." And she hung up before she could hear anymore of her aunt's yelling.

__

I am so sick of my damn life. Joy adjusted her short cheerleading skirt as she headed towards her car. _Every day is the same. I don't have any friends. I don't have any family. I don't even really have a boyfriend. Blake isn't my boyfriend...he's just someone to date..._she was interrupted by the slight sound of footsteps on the pavement behind her. She turned around immediately.

"Whoa, de-ja-vou!"

Hey slayer." The mysterious man who saved Joy from the group of hungry vampires only a few weeks ago, was standing, no more like lurking, in the shadows just behind her.

"Oh please, don't start that again!" Joy rolled her eyes and turned back to her car. "I have had a long day and I am not in the mood for your smart-ass remarks about something I'm not." Joy dug through her purse to find her keys.

"So, you're a cheerleader." He sounded like he was about to laugh.

"Look, like I said before, I've had a long day, and I'm not in the mood for your jokes." Joy glared.

He stared at her with an expressionless gaze. "Strange, you're not the first slayer I've known who has tried cheerleading..."

"Okay, so I get that you think I'm this powerful 'slayer' or whatever, but..."

"Something's coming, slayer." the man almost growled as he spoke. "We don't know what it is or how to fight it, but we need you, slayer." He stepped closer to her and stared deep into her eyes. "We need your help, Joy."

She stared back hesitantly. "How do you know my name?" She shook her head. "Never mind, you know a lot about me, obviously." She stepped back towards her car. "I need to know more about you...and the slayer. Will you meet me here tomorrow?"

He nodded. "Of course. Goodnight." He turned and started walking away. "By the way, my name's Angel."

Joy smiled. "Angel? That's kind of sweet...and strange." She climbed into her car as he disappeared into the shadows.

The next night, immediately after cheer practice, Joy returned to the parking lot, hoping that Angel would be early and she wouldn't have to wait too long, She was too anxious. Her cell phone ran just before six o'clock. It was Blake.

"Hello?" Joy had had the urge not to answer her phone. She couldn't figure out why but she was more interested in Angel than Blake, at the moment.

"Hey babe, what're you up to?" He greeted her.

"I'm on my way home." She lied.

"Really? It's early. I was hoping we could go to dinner or something." He didn't really sound interested in what she wanted to do.

Joy rolled her eyes. "Actually, I've got other plans tonight. I'll talk to you later. Bye." Joy hung up without giving him time to reply or to say goodbye. As she put her phone away in her purse, Joy smiled to herself; satisfied with achieving power over her arrogant boyfriend, finally.

As the sun dropped behind the trees, Joy began to doubt that Angel would show. She had been waiting for almost a half hour. _He's so strange. Why did I agree to meet him here? No, why did I ask to meet him here? He could be some kind of creep, like a rapist or something! God, I'm so stupid. Why can't I just go and ask Dawn what I want to know? Why have I been ignoring Dawn? She didn't do anything to deserve that! She's the only one in this pathetic town that has actually been nice to me!_ She didn't have any more time for mental criticizing and whining because at that moment Angel showed up, pressing his face against the window and making Joy almost scream in surprise.

"God, Angel!" Joy got out of the car with a scowl. "Don't just creep up on me like that!"

"I thought slayers were brave!" Angel grinned.

"Maybe they are. I wouldn't know, considering I'm not a slayer!" Joy glared at him.

"I thought that's why you wanted to meet me here though. To learn more about being a slayer." Angel pointed out.

"Well...yea...I guess..." Joy sighed. "I don't know why I wanted you to meet me here. I'm so confused!" She felt like crying but she would never let this strange, strong man see her acting that weak.

Angel seemed to sense how upset she was and instantly softened. "Come on, let's go inside. I'll buy you a coffee." He led the way into the nearly empty cafe. He found an empty table in a quiet corner of the cafe and pulled out a chair for Joy. She looked at him for a minute curiously and then sat down. "What would you like? A mocha? cappuccino? milk?" He grinned jokingly. She didn't smile. "Sorry." He shrugged. "You're just so young."

Joy rolled her eyes. "I'll have a chai latte."

Angel nodded and left briefly to place her order and then he returned to table and sat down. Neither of them spoke for a minute. Neither of them really knew what to say. Finally, Angel took the initiative and said what he hoped she wanted to hear.

"Joy, I know it's hard for you to believe, or understand, or accept, or whatever, but you are the slayer." He paused.

Surprisingly this time Joy did not argue his addressing her as the slayer. "What about the other one?"

"The other one what?"

"The other slayer!" Joy reminded him. "I can't remember her name right now...Beth or Becky or Bonny..."

"Buffy." Angel declared without any thought.

"Yea, that's it!" Joy agreed. "Do you know her?"

"I used to." Angel dropped the subject before Joy even had a chance to question him about it.

"Are you part of their group?" Joy asked after a moment of silence.

"Excuse me?"

"You know, the other slayer and her little posse or whatever they are." Joy was thinking of Buffy and her weird professor-type friend.

"Buffy?" Angel spat out the name as if it were a joke for Joy to have mentioned it at all. "No. I'm not a part of their group." A waitress stopped at the table and dropped off Joy's drink. When they were alone again, Angel continued. "I was sent here by the powers that be..."

"The whats?" Joy interrupted.

"The powers that be," Angel repeated. "They are the supernatural powers that are in control of the...well supernatural. It's probably hard for you to comprehend, but just believe me, they're real. I've seen them." He waited for her puzzled frown and then continued. "Anyway, I was sent here by the powers that be to...well...train you, I guess that's how to explain it."

"Train me?"

"Well, yea," He cleared his throat. "You know, to train you to be a slayer." She frowned. "Anyway, I am here to train you or to help you in any way that I can during your first experiences as a slayer." He paused and stared at her hard. "You are the slayer now, aren't you?"

Joy looked at him for a minute in silence and then slowly a smile crept across her lips and she nodded. "Yea, I guess I'm the slayer."


	21. Chapter Twenty One

Chapter Twenty-One: The Beginnings

"Dawn," Joy had driven herself practically crazy with guilt by the time she got up the nerve to call Dawn. It had been so long since Joy had actually spoken with the slayer's sister and she felt terrible about the way she had dropped the friendship. She wasn't sure what she would exactly, but somehow Joy had to inform Dawn that she had finally consented to accepting the role of 'slayer'. _Well, I guess I can't put it off any longer. _"Dawn...I don't know exactly what to say..."

Dawn interrupted Joy before she had a chance to stumble over her words any worse. "Why are you calling me, Joy?" Dawn couldn't hide the surprise in her voice when she answered the phone and discovered Joy on the other line. They hadn't spoken to each other for over two weeks and both of the girls felt it was Joy's fault. By introducing Joy to her sister, all Dawn had wanted was to help Joy and to help her understand what she was, but obviously that plan had backfired. So, really, Dawn felt that she had done nothing wrong in her friendship with Joy.

Joy didn't know how to respond. "Well...I just wanted...I umm..." She sighed in frustration. Joy hated being tongue-twisted. She always seemed to know exactly what to say in every situation, even though half of the time she was just utilizing her sarcasm. But now she couldn't even come up with one word to express her regret about ditching Dawn.

"Joy, I'm kind of in the middle of something so if you could possibly make this quick. That would be great." Dawn sounded annoyed.

"Okay, here it goes..." Joy took a deep breath, pushed aside all her pride, and began her apology. "I've been thinking a lot lately about how rude I was to you after the whole 'slayer' thing, and I feel terrible about it." She sighed. "I don't really know why I behaved that way, I mean you were just trying to help and be my friend, and that's a lot more than anyone else here tried to do. You didn't deserve for me to start ignoring you like I did...I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm sorry, and I'd really like it if you would forgive me." Dawn was silent and Joy was afraid that she might have hung up. "Hello? Dawn?"

When she finally did speak, it wasn't what Joy was expecting. "Well, you did give me a second chance. I guess...I guess you deserve for me to give you another chance as well."

Joy was too pleased to speak. "Really, just like that?"

"Yea, just like that. I've missed your friendship Joy." Dawn explained. "No matter what's happened, I think we could be great friends, still."

"I hope so," Joy smiled to herself as she thought of having her friend back.

"I'm glad you agreed to come back, Joy," Dawn's sister greeted Joy as she entered the Summers' house the following Friday after school. "I felt awful about the way I let you leave last time we saw you. I mean, after just forcing all that information onto you and then just expecting you to understand..."

"Yea, whatever, I'm here now, so tell me what you want." Joy leaned against the wall. She didn't want to be there, but Dawn begged her to come over until Joy finally had to give in. She agreed to visit Buffy the vampire slayer, and listen to whatever she had to say, but beyond that Joy gave no promises. So now she was there, at the same place where a few weeks ago she had been informed of her 'destiny', waiting to hear what other expectations awaited her in her future as a slayer.

The old guy that first told Joy who she was, was there, sitting on the couch rubbing furiously at his glasses with a handkerchief. He spoke first. "Miss Peters..."

"Oh god! Is he for real?" Joy smirked. "What's with the 'miss' shit? It's just Joy, okay?"

He nodded. "Fine. Joy, I appreciate you coming out here after being frightened away the last time we talked. I'm assuming that you've accepted the truth about what you are and are here to learn more about what it means to be the Slayer?"

Joy shrugged. "Actually, I'm here because, like before, Dawn wouldn't stop bugging me until I agreed to come. I'm fine with being the slayer, whatever, but I really couldn't care less about knowing what that means." She dropped onto the couch opposite the older man and stretched out comfortably.

"I see we have a lot of training to do with you." He sighed. "Buffy, I think we should take Joy to the training room at the Magic Box."

"Wait a minute, who said that I was going anywhere with you guys? I came over here to talk, not to go anywhere or to do anything, okay?" Joy stood. "I honestly don't understand you guys, but I'm willing to listen to whatever you have to say. So, just talk okay? Talk quickly and get right to the point and then I'm gone." Her gaze fell on each of the people around the room. Buffy was still standing in the entryway, just outside of the living room, openly staring at Joy, up and down as though analyzing every inch of the young, new slayer. Giles had finally ceased cleaning his glasses and had returned them to his face and he now sat very still with his hands on his knees, and a contemplating frown on his face as he watched Joy. Dawn had taken a seat in an overstuffed chair beside the couch, leaning forward, clearly excited, her round eyes sparkling as she watched the interactions between the new and old slayer. Joy returned to the couch and sat in silence.

"Alright, we'll talk," The older man picked up the conversation.

"Hold on, before we start, what was your name and who exactly are you?" Joy interrupted quickly.

He smiled. "Rupert Giles." He introduced himself. "I am, or I was Buffy's watcher."

"Her watcher? What the hell is that supposed to mean? Is a watcher some British term for a nanny or something?" Joy laughed.

"I beg your pardon!" Giles exclaimed. "I am not a _nanny_!" He cleared his throat.

"I am twenty-two! I do not need a nanny!" Buffy defended herself. Dawn snickered.

"A watcher, Joy, is a sort of guardian for slayers. A watcher trains and instructs their slayers in order to prepare them for whatever battles they may be faced with in life." Giles explained.

"So, Rupert's sort of like Buffy's teacher?" Joy turned to Dawn. She preferred talking with her friend, then with this strange British man.

"We all call him Giles." Dawn pointed out. "And yea, I guess he's sort of a teacher, he's always been more like an uncle though."

Joy looked back at Giles who was straightening out a fold in his tweed jacket. "Yea, I'm going to be calling him Rupert. He's definitely more of a Rupert. It's very British Professor-ish." She grinned. "That's cool with you right Rupert?"

He nodded hesitantly. "Sure, whatever you like," he tried to resume his explanation. "Now, I am glad that you have agreed to realize that you are the slayer, but now I need to explain to you what your position entails. Obviously the title 'vampire slayer' clarifies the fact that you will be fighting vampires. I believe you have already fought a few of those creatures, and as I understand, you defeated them very well." Joy shrugged; she didn't realize that she should be proud of the fact that dusting vampires was easy for her. "What about demons? Have you ever fought one of them?"

"Aren't vampires demons?"

"Well, yes, vampires are a type of demon, but there are so many varieties of demonic species." Giles walked over to the desk at the back of the room and returned carrying a large, leather-bound book. "These are just a few of the many kinds." He handed the book to Joy and she flipped through the pages. Unconsciously, her mouth dropped open as she glanced at the many detailed illustrations of demonic creatures that filled the pages of the thick manuscript. "Many people would have a difficult time accepting that these beings exist in our world, and I know it's terrifying to think about, but unfortunately Joy, for people like you and Buffy, you don't have the luxury to live in denial about demons." He paused to make sure that the new slayer understood everything he was trying to explain to her. "Joy, as the slayer, it is your destiny to fight this evil and destroy it."

Joy was silent. She had not response. After learning that she was the slayer, Joy assumed that it meant she would possibly have a few more meetings with annoying vampires which she would fight and kill, but the idea of demons also invading her life had never crossed her mind. It was too strange for her to process.

"Joy, are you okay?" Dawn leaned in close to her friend. Without realizing it, Joy's eyes had started to cloud with tears. She was overwhelmed with this new information.

She blinked quickly. "Yea, I'm fine." She stood up and headed towards the door. "I'm sorry, but I've got to go. This was, well, unexpected. I just need some time to think. Thanks for talking to me though," she slipped past Buffy and smiled reassuringly. "I'll call you tomorrow Dawn." She hurried out the door and to her car without looking back at either of the Summers girls who were standing in the doorway watching her leave. _This is just too weird. I don't understand any of it. I mean, I believe it, strangely, I really do believe it. But, I don't understand it. Why me? _

Once they had watched Joy drive away, the Summers girls closed the front door and returned to the living room where Giles was waiting, unmoved from his seat on the couch. Buffy and Dawn sat together on the couch opposite Giles and waited for the watcher to speak.

"Well Buffy, you are the slayer, so I am curious to hear your thoughts about Joy Peters." He waited for Buffy's response.

"She's sort of got an attitude," Buffy shrugged. "But no worse than Faith, I guess. She seems capable of adjusting if we just give her a chance to get used to us."

"I hope you're right, because if you guys can't get along then I don't know what will happen to our friendship." Dawn sighed. "Can I invite her over for dinner tomorrow night?"

Buffy nodded, "Of course, you can invite her over any time. I just hope she wants to come."

"I'm sure she'll want to come, she doesn't seem to like being at her house very much, but promise me we won't talk about the whole slayer thing. Maybe if she can get to know you as my sister she can be more accepting to knowing you as the slayer." Dawn suggested.

Giles agreed. "Buffy, we cannot force her to be comfortable with her destiny, but I only hope that our friendship will be enough to help her with accepting her new self. If we can't help, I don't know how she'll ever become a good slayer!"


	22. Chapter Twenty Two

Chapter Twenty-Two: Training

"Well, I wasn't expecting to see you here!" Joy surprisingly did not jump when she noticed Angel waiting in the shadows by her car after cheer practice a week later. "Did you need me to get rid of a vampire for you or something?" She rolled her eyes. "Or are there some demons bothering you? Because you know, supposedly as a slayer, I should be able to fight any sort of evil!"

"You sound like you've been talking to Giles." Angel said.

"You know Giles?"

"I've known him for a few years actually." He didn't want to get into his history with the old librarian, but if he expected for Joy to trust him Angel decided he would have to be entirely truthful. "See, I used to be pretty close to the other slayer and her gang, including Giles, the watcher." He paused and watched for a reaction from Joy. She leaned against her car, her arms folded across her chest, her eyes staring blankly at him. He couldn't read anything from her expression. "But, that's all in the past now, and I actually don't know them at all anymore. I've been living a completely separate life in LA and haven't been in Sunnydale for a couple of years now. I only came back here for you..."

"Which still confuses me, by the way," Joy interrupted. "Last time we talked, you mentioned the 'powers that be', and umm, I don't exactly get what these almighty powers are supposed to be." She shrugged. "Could you maybe explain it to me a little more?"

Angel nodded. He was pleased that she was at least showing more interest. Perhaps if he could help her understand the powers and what her true purpose was as a slayer, perhaps she could actually accept her fate and possibly enjoy it like Buffy learned to do.

Two hours later Angel, after at least the fifth time re-explaining everything to Joy, sat silently in the passenger seat of Joy's car watching for her expression to show some sort of acceptance or at least understanding. She was frowning and for a minute he thought she was going cross-eyed.

Finally she spoke. "So, how are you going to be training me?"

A hint of a smile crept over his lips. Joy had noticed before that he didn't smile much, and this was probably the most she had ever seen him smile. She figured that he was just moody. "Well, these nightly meetings seem to be going pretty well. We could just keep our regular time and meet here every night for your training."

Joy hesitated, "Does it have to be nights?"

Angel frowned, "Night is sort of the time for vampires, you know the darkness and everything."

"Oh, right, of course, I don't know what I was thinking." Joy silently beat herself up for forgetting that small but very important fact about the creatures she would be fighting. "So, night it is." She sighed and thought about how she could persuade her aunt and uncle to let her stay out even later than cheerleading practice. "Then I guess I'll meet you here tomorrow, same time as usual."

"See you then," He climbed out of the car and with a wave he disappeared into the shadows.

Two weeks later, after nightly workouts with Angel, Joy was congratulating herself on her surprising skill with fighting. Angel was a great training companion too, as well as an interesting enough friend. At first meeting, Joy hadn't expected to get along with the strange shadow-lurking man, however, after the couple of weeks she had known him, Angel had turned out to be an unexpectedly compatible guy. In fact, by the end of the two weeks, she found herself start to look forward to her nightly training sessions with him. Eventually, Angel turned the simple training nights into an actual night of real practice.

"So, what's the plan for tonight, coach?" Joy questioned as she pulled a pair of jeans out from the backseat of her car and pulled them on underneath her cheerleading skirt. She ignored the fact that she was standing in the open in the middle of a parking lot, facing a man.

He frowned. "Please don't call me coach, I'm not exactly a sports fan."

She grinned. "Me either, actually."

"And yet you're a cheerleader..." His tone was mocking.

"Shut up, coach," Joy held to her nickname for her trainer.

"Anyway, I figured that we've trained you long enough now and I think it's time for you to get some real practice in." Angel motioned for her to follow him. "We'll come back for your car later."

"Okay," Joy followed him obediently. "So, where are we going?" She zipped up the hoodie she was wearing over her the sports bra she wore for cheer practice. "The cemetery? I hear a lot of undead hang out there."

Angel thought for a minute about taking her to the cemetery but then decided against it because he realized that Buffy was probably patrolling right about now and he didn't exactly want to run into her. He hadn't seen her since he'd been back in Sunnydale, and he wasn't planning to any time soon. In fact, he had an unconscious plan to not see Buffy at all while he was training Joy. His plans consisted of training Joy and then bailing from the demon-city without ever seeing Buffy or anyone else from her group of slayeretts. So, he decided against a visit to the cemetery.

"We're not going to the cemetery tonight," Angel announced.

"But I thought we were going demon hunting!" Joy whined. It was strange when she realized that she was actually sort of craving a good fight.

"Believe it or not, but cemeteries aren't the only places where demons exist. In fact, they sort of tend to wander all over town, you know? Hunting for available prey wherever they can find it." Angel continued leading Joy down the dark streets towards Sunnydale's number one late night hangout for young people craving excitement, The Bronze.

"Are we going clubbing?" Joy asked with a raised eyebrow as the club came into view.

"You'd like that, I'm sure," Angel rolled his eyes and led her to the alley behind the club. "We're patrolling tonight."

"Patrolling? Fancy lingo!" Joy joked. "Is that an official term, or something that you made up to sound smarter than me?"

Angel shrugged. "Well, I am smarter than you, but it's also sort of 'official' if you'd like to call it that. It's what slayers call their nightly, well patrol, for vampires and demons and any other evil that they find." Joy looked confused. "Don't worry, you'll catch up. Soon, you'll be patrolling as expertly as Buffy." Angel comforted the overwhelmed new slayer. "Here we are," Angel indicated the back alley of the popular club.

Joy glanced around the dark, abandoned alley. "Yep, this place is swarming with evil creatures! I can definitely see why you brought me here," She pulled a cigarette and lighter out of her jacket pocket. "Oh wait, you brought me here to this dark, very empty place so that you could rape me!" She exclaimed dramatically.

Angel frowned. "That's not why...I wouldn't...I..." Her sarcastic words had obviously taken him off guard.

"Angel, chill, I'm just screwing with you." Joy grinned. "God, you're sensitive, and really bad at taking jokes!"

"Oh right, sorry," He cleared his throat and led me farther down the alley. "I assume you know The Bronze."

Joy shrugged. "Well, yes, I do love the party scene!"

"Yea, I'm sure you do," He grinned and pointed to the back door of the club. "Are you aware that The Bronze is a very popular hang out for vampires." Joy didn't respond. "The intoxicated girls are good targets for hungry vampires. See, the vampires find their prey and then bring them back here to the abandoned alley where they can feed in peace." He pulled her away from the door and into a shadow that hid them both easily.  
"Trust me, all you have to do is wait." He glanced over at Joy who was silently leaning against the wall, her arms folded across her chest and her cigarette held between her lips. "Could you put that out?"

"Sorry, I didn't realize my smoking bothered you." Joy tossed the bud onto the floor and ground it into the concrete with the heel of her shoe. "Are you one of those health freaks? You know, the people that think that second hand smoke will kill them."

Angel shook his head, "No, I don't really worry about second hand smoke." He thought of his lack of breathing and grinned. "I just thought we'd be more discreet here in the shadows if you weren't smoking. Vampires have incredible noses. They can pick up any scent!"

"Good to know." Joy nodded.

They didn't have to wait too long. A few minutes later they back door swung open and a couple stumbled out through the open doorway. The man was dressed in the most unfortunate pair of tight, blue pants and a paisley silk shirt. The girl's fashionable red dress contrasted with his style extremely. Joy almost laughed at how awkwardly they fit together.

"What do you think Joy?" Angel whispered in her ear, being careful that they stayed hidden in the shadows.

"Well, he's obviously evil! I mean look at what he's wearing! No sane person would actually dress like that!" Joy whispered back decidedly.

"Whatever you say," Angel shrugged. "You're the slayer."

"So, what do you want me to do? Should I kill him now?"

"Just wait for a minute," Angel touched her arm when she started moving out of the shadows. "Watch."

Impatiently, she stood still, watching as he commanded. A moment later she realized why Angel had told her to wait. The 'evil' young man had been pushed up against the wall by the stylish young woman who was busily unbuttoning the guy's collar. Joy gasped when the woman's pretty face transformed into the too-familiar wrinkles and fangs that belong to vampires. Her eyes glowed yellow as she prepared to attack her victim.

"Damn," Joy sighed. "Since she's the vampire, then that means that he's just pitiful in fashion." She ignored Angel's exasperated sigh and hurried to intrude on the vampire's snack. "Hey, mind if I join in?" The vampire turned to Joy with a sharp glare. "I mean, he just looks so tasty!"

The pathetically dressed guy looked terrified but the vampire turned her attention confidently onto Joy, her fangs gleamed in the light from the single streetlamp. "If you'd really care to, I'd _love _to give you a taste!" The vampire laughed, sounding a lot like the wicked witch from _The Wizard of Oz_, and returned her attention to her victim.

Joy sighed, "Fine, if you wish to play it that way..." She looked back to the shadows where Angel was waiting patiently to see how Joy performed, then Joy took hold of the vampire girl's arm and pulled her away from the nervous man.

"Do you really want to start something with me, little girl?" The vampire growled.

"Well, the cable's out, so I'm a little bored tonight," Joy shrugged.

The vampire frowned, obviously confused about the strange intruder. "Don't go anywhere." She demanded of the young man who was now literally shaking with fear. The vampire grinned at Joy and then leaped upon her suddenly. Joy pretended to be frightened for an instant before flipping the vampire onto her back and pinning her down to the ground. "Well, well, the little girl's got guts. I've got to give you props for bravery, I suppose." The female vampire laughed again and pushed Joy off of her. "Unfortunately for you, it won't last long." She raised her hands up as though she were a cat preparing to pounce with claws and a strange hissing sound escaped through her sharp teeth.

"You're pretty cocky for a chick." Joy smiled teasingly and ducked an attempted attack from the vampire. She then tried her own attack, much more successful; she actually managed to knock the vampire off her feet with a forceful jump kick.

"Just a chick? I'm a damn vampire, what can you brag about?" The vampire was beginning to remind Joy of a slightly stronger version of Kelly from her old school in LA. Joy couldn't wait to stake the bitch.

"Well, I'm not usually one to brag but since you asked so nicely..." Joy picked up a piece of wood of the ground and broke it into a small stake. "I'm the new slayer!" And while the vampire stood still, stunned at Joy's announcement, the self-declared new slayer staked the vampire perfectly in the heart. She spun around with a grin of victory. "I showed her!" She declared to Angel who was clapping as he stepped out of the shadows.

"Miss Peters, I think I've taught you very well!"

"Mr. Angel, you are a very good coach." Joy was in an exceptionally good mood and feeling very proud of herself. Even though she had staked several vampires before, this particular night seemed like a special achievement since it was the first time she had staked a vampire with Angel's training, and it was definitely the fastest she had ever slayed. "You know, this whole slayer thing isn't as bad as I imagined it would be. It's actually kind of fun!" She linked her arm with his and looked up into his brown eyes. "Where to next, coach?"

"If you're nice and you stop calling me that I just might let you go home early tonight." He grinned at her.

"Early? It's almost eleven!" Joy laughed. "Okay, I would like to go home early considering I have a test tomorrow in History, and at the rate I'm going I won't be able to remember the difference between George Washington and George of the Jungle!" She yawned.

"You're a freak, you know?" He put his arm around her waist as if to hold her up. "You're also tired. Am I working you too hard?"

"No, but you shouldn't have taken away my cigarette!" She mock-glared and leaned against him for support. "I'm warning you, if you make me stop smoking you have to at least give me a redbull or some sort of caffeine to keep me conscience."

"I'll make a note."

"Thank you."

"So, how would you like tomorrow off?" He asked.

"Really?" Joy smiled. "You're like an Egyptian slave-driver, and offering to give me a night off must be very difficult for you..."

"Well, I thought you could use the break. You know, catch up on homework, or sleep, or go out on a date or something young and fun like that." He suggested. "Of course, if you don't want a night off you can try patrolling at..."

"No thanks! A night off would be very appreciated!" Joy interrupted before he changed his mind. "I've barely seen my boyfriend for a couple of weeks..."

"You have a boyfriend?" He seemed surprised.

"Yea, I have a boyfriend, is that so hard to believe?"

"No, actually not at all. You're a very pretty girl Joy." He sounded so sincere.

"Thank you, Angel." Joy smiled. "So, what about you, any girls in your life?"

Angel cleared his throat. "Uh, no not at the moment." He tried to change the subject. "So, when do I get to meet this boyfriend of yours? You know, I have to make sure I approve of him."

"Okay, I'm going home now!" They had reached the parking lot where her car had been left. She unlinked her arm from his and started walking away from him.

"Come on, I'm serious!" He called after her.

"Goodnight!" She waved and he headed back, into the shadows. _I like him. _Joy decided as she climbed into her car and started the short drive home. _He's not at all how he seemed at first. I mean I had him pegged as a moody, boring weirdo! But he's super nice, and totally the big brother type. Plus, he's really good with the whole fighting thing!_


	23. Chapter Twenty Three

Chapter Twenty-Three: Secrets From the Scoobies

"Dawn, I don't need your sister to _train _me!" Joy exclaimed for probably the tenth time that day. "Trust me, my fighting skills are just fine!" She slammed her locker shut and headed towards the girls' locker room to change for cheer practice.

"Joy, you said you were accepting the whole slayer thing!" Dawn persisted, following close behind her friend.

"I _am _accepting it, but that doesn't mean that your sister has to teach me to fight!" She grinned. "Besides I bet that I could kick her ass good!" Joy bragged.

"Joy, you can't even reach her ass!" Dawn grinned mockingly. If there was anything Joy was sensitive about it was her height. She was pretty and had a figure that even her fellow cheerleaders envied, but it was no secret that she was a bit short for her age. She held to the belief that she stopped growing in seventh grade when she reached 5'3". However, she did love taking advantage of being able to wear the tallest stilletos she can find and still be shorter than most of the guys in her school.

"I know I haven't been the 'slayer' as long as your sister, but I've been been fighting since pre-school." She reached the locker room and Dawn followed her inside. "Trust me, I could take her."

"No offense sweetie, but you're delusional. Nobdy can take her! She's an incredible fighter!"

"What are you? Buffy's spokeswoman?" Joy retrieved her sweatpants from her locker and started changing for practice. "Alright, here's the deal," Joy pulled on her sports bra. "I'll come over tomorrow morning, or early afternoon depending on whenever I wake up, and then Buffy and I can have a contest and we'll see who the better fighter is. If she wins then I'll let her train me some of her techniques. But, if I when, the subject is dropped and I get to go patrolling with her tomorrow night!"

"Where'd you learn about patrolling?" Dawn asked.

Joy hesitated. _Does Angel want Dawn to know about him? I mean, he seems to know Buffy, but he had been pretty sneaky about training me, and he's never mentioned me telling Buffy about him. I don't want to spoil it if she doesn't know..._"You've mentioned it before." Joy quickly lied.

"Oh right," She shrugged. "Well, anyway, I can't really make a bet with you because I'm not sure if my sister would go for it, but..."

"I'm sure she wouldn't mind." Joy decided. "Besides, she'll have to take me with her eventually. How did she plan on training me if she doesn't take me with her?" She argued.

"Well, it's not exactly just physical training." Dawn explained. "See, Buffy's watcher, Giles, you met him at the house, he has his own style of training slayers. It's sort of a watcher's job. They train slayers in fighting technique as well as mental and emotional preparations..." Dawn's explanation slowed. "Okay, so I'm not exactly sure how a slayer is trained, but Giles really wants to talk to you."

Joy sighed. _Angel's been training me fine! I doubt he thinks I need to talk to a 'watcher'. _"Fine, he can talk to me, but I'm not guaranteeing how cooperative I'll be!"

The girls parted with Joy's promise to be at the Summers' house by noon the next day. Joy completed cheer practice, showered and changed, and then met with Blake outside of the guys' locker room. As she approached the locker room she found Blake standing out front surrounded by a group of his lackees, or fellow basketball players. Joy strode over to the group and waited for a minute before deciding to interrupt their conversation.

"Hey Blake," She greeted and waited for him to take notice of her. He had been so annoying lately. Spending all his time with the team and practically completely ignoring her. The only few times they had gone out was when they doubled with another basketball/cheerleader couple and then Blake would treat her like a trophy! He would walk around with her on his arm, bragging to all the guys how great their relationship was, and then three seconds later he'd be flirting with the waitress. Joy was so bored with him. She had been debating lately whether or not she should break up with him. It was a very tempting consideration.

Blake said goodbye to his friends and greeted Joy with a quick kiss. "How was practice?" He didn't wait for her to answer. "Do you want to go out tonight?" Again he didn't wait for her to answer. "I was thinking we could go to the mall. I know I usually hate going shopping with you but I need to buy a few things so..." He secured his arm around her waist. "Come on, it'll be fun."

Joy pushed aside her negative thoughts with a smile. "Fine, let's go shopping."

Unfortunately, as fun as the night had sounded, Joy had never enjoyed herself less. The entire shopping experience consisted of Blake ordering her around to the different stores he wanted to go to and Joy obediently following, hoping that he would soon be done and she could shop for herself or just go home and possibly meet up with Angel later for some patrolling. That seemed funner than shopping with Blake. Eventually, Blake did seem to get bored with buying himself new clothes and shoes and such (Joy was debating the fact that he actually owned more clothes than she did) he agreed to follow Joy around for a while and let her shop. His patience didn't last long though and within an hour he begged her to be done. Of course she didn't want to shop with him nagging her to finish so after buying only one pair of shoes before leaving the mall. After their shopping adventure Blake insisted that they go out to his favorite restaurant, which was actually just a pizza parlor where the basketball guys loved to hang out. While they were eating, their meal was interrupted about five times by Blake's basketball buddies and their girlfriends. Of course Joy knew most of the girlfriends but if she had her way she wouldn't exactly choose to hang out with them. She'd rather be with Dawn, or even Dawn's crazy sister! After dinner Blake suggested going to a party one of his friends was throwing but Joy refused, claiming that she wasn't feeling well and needed to go home. Blake didn't argue but told her that he was going to go without her anyway and she didn't try to stop him. She didn't care what he did, even if he was her boyfriend.

When she returned home, Joy was forced to suffer through thirty minutes of punishment from her uncle for coming home so late, even though she had made it a point to call them and let them know that she had a date. Her aunt and uncle didn't seem to feel it was important for a high school student to have a boyfriend or to go on dates or to have any after school activities for that matter. By the time her uncle was finished with his physical discipline, Joy was in no mood to go out patrolling and so she went to bed, tired and sore.

Dragging herself out of bed early the next morning, Joy got ready to go to the Summers' house as she had promised Dawn. Her shower was excruciating. Joy hadn't realized how hard her uncle had beat on her the previous night, but it seemed worse than usual and as she took her shower she discovered at least a dozen black and blue bruises. As she stood in front of her mirror to apply her makeup, Joy found a dark ring forming around her eye. She did her best to cover it with makeup but her eye still looked swollen and slightly tinted.

She left her house a little late but drove quickly and managed to make it to Dawn's only a few minutes past noon. Bringing herself to ring the doorbell was unusually difficult for Joy. She stood on the doorstep, zipping and unzipping her white hoodie for almost a full minute before deciding that she shouldn't be any later. As she raised her hand to the doorbell though, the door swung open and Dawn stood in the entryway grinning.

"You're late!" Dawn declared, taking Joy's hand and pulling her inside. "Everyone's waiting for you." She led the way into the front room. Buffy was sitting on the couch, Giles was across from her on the opposite couch, Willow was perched on the armrest of the couch next to Buffy, and Buffy's boyfriend, Riley, was leaning against the wall.

"Sorry I'm late," Joy apologized meekly. "There was a crisis with the...and then I..." She sighed and shrugged. "Nope, there's no excuse, I'm just late. I've never been too good with the whole schedule thing."

Dawn nodded, "I don't think she's ever been on time to a class before."

Giles cleared his throat, "I see, we must work on that."

Joy rolled her eyes, "Well, I'm here now so let's get to it." She slumped onto the couch at the opposite end from Buffy.

Buffy eyed the new slayer curiously. "Umm, so, Joy, how've you been?"

Joy cleared her throat. "Okay, so I know I agreed to come here and everything but I have a few rules before we start this...meeting or whatever it officially is." She glanced around the group, achieving eye contact with everyone before continuing. "First of all, no lame explanations of what evil is. And definitely no group bonding or any of that shit. I don't need any of that from you guys, I've bonded with enough people in my life."

Giles cut her off before she had a chance to ramble any longer. "Alright Joy, I want to ask you a few questions. Are you going to oblige me and answer each of them, or are you going to become angry and storm out of here again?"

Joy squirmed in her seat. She hated it when older people talked down to her and she especially hated it when she was given orders. "Yes, Rupert, you can ask me whatever you want and I'll answer without any arguing. I came here by choice and I knew that you guys would probably interrogate me. So, go ahead, interrogate me."

Giles removed his glasses as he pondered his first question. "I do not want to bore you, but I do wish to know as much about you as possible, so please just have patience with me." He cleaned his glasses with his hankerchief and returned them to their place. "How old are you?"

"Sixteen." Joy stated automatically. "I'll be seventeen in September. September eighth, if you want to be exact."

Giles nodded, he didn't really seem interested in Joy's age as much as making conversation. "When did you meet your first vampire?"

Joy took a deep breath as she remembered her first vampire confrontation. "Last Halloween."

"Really? That's strange." Giles frowned. Joy shrugged. She was trying to act nonchalant as she remembered the morning after Halloween when she had first met the vampire Henri. It was a time that she had tried to forget without success. "Usually vampires and demons are fairly innactive on Halloween. Did you encounter many vampires that night?"

Joy shook her head. "Just one."

"Really? And you slayed it I assume?"

Joy shook her head again. "No, I didn't." She noticed Giles's confused frown. "I ran away from him." She took another deep breath.

"He didn't chase you?" Buffy asked quickly. "The vampires I've met usually don't let me run away from them."

Joy didn't know how to respond without telling them the truth, the whole truth. "Umm, yea, I outran him."

"Really? Maybe you should try out for your school's track team! Vampires can run pretty damn fast, you know?" Buffy obviously didn't believe Joy's story.

"Look, he let me go, okay? I answered your question so can we please just move on?" Joy didn't want to explain her relationship with Henri right now. She didn't know them well enough yet.

Buffy didn't drop it that easily. "He let you go?"

"Buffy," Giles's voice dropped to a demanding tone. "Let it be." She silenced obediently but Joy could see Buffy's eyes twitching anxiously. "Joy, what happened to your parents?"

She clenched her teeth. _Why does he have to bring up all this shit? Angel knows to leave my past alone. If I wanted to talk about something I would. Rupert doesn't know when to stop. _She answered anyway. She didn't think she had much of a choice since she had agreed to answer all of his questions. "My parents died."

"How?"

"A car crash." She lied without any thought.

"Really?"

__

Why doesn't anyone ever believe me? "Yes really."

"And when was that?" Giles asked.

"November eleventh." The date flew off her tongue easily. That was a date she would never forget.

"And now you live with..."

"My Aunt and Uncle."

"I see," Giles was silent for a while. Joy glanced around the group and realized that everyone's eyes were fixed on her. "And how many encounters have you had with vampires since your first?" Giles asked.

Joy counted inside her head for a moment before answering. "There's been a few different times, maybe around ten." She shrugged. "I'm not really sure." She knew that with Angel she had fought vampires a few times, and then there were the few times that she had fought them on her own.

"And have you ever met any demons other than vampires?"

Joy shook her head. "Not that I know of."

"Well, in order to prepare you for any meetings you will eventually have with all sorts of demonic beings, you will need to agree to being trained. I will train you just as I have trained Buffy. She will help you as well." Giles explained.

Joy sighed, "Well, thanks for the offer, but I don't think I really need your training..."

"Actually Joy, you do." Giles cut her off. "All slayers need the training of a watcher. A watcher teaches their slayer more than just the correct fighting technique or how to defend themselves against demons. I will teach you how to accept every aspect of who you are and to utilize your gifts to your full potential of being the Slayer."

Joy didn't answer. She started contemplating the benefit of receiving double training, from Angel and from Giles. Within weeks she could probably take Buffy in a fight. Joy imagined that she could take Buffy now, but she didn't want to try as long as she had the possibility of being humiliating. Humiliation was something that Joy did not handle very well. Joy stood suddenly. "Okay. When do we start?"


	24. Chapter Twenty Four

Chapter Twenty-Four: Training Tension

"Now, I am certain you have had some experience with a stake before," Giles had been rambling on for almost ten straight minutes on proper caution to take while patrolling and now he had moved on to weapons. He rambled way too much for any sane human being. Joy didn't know how much more of his lessons she could handle.

"Yes, Rupert, I am acquainted with the 'high-tech' weaponry we slayers are privledged to use." She rolled her eyes and grabbed the sharp stick from the watcher. "The pointy end goes into the heart the vampire goes 'poof', did I leave anything out?" She twirled the stick between her fingers with a bored smirk plastered on her face.

"Uh, yes, I see you are not unused to stakes," Giles cleared his throat. "Good, then we should move on." He led the small group through the maze of tombstones scattered throughout the dark cemetery. Joy wasn't sure he really knew where he was taking them or what exactly he wanted to teach Joy, but she followed obediently since she had promised Dawn that she would be good while out on patrol. "Perhaps we should let you have some real practice." Giles nodded towards a vampire that had stepped out of the trees and had started creeping towards them, trying to stay hidden in the shadows to avoid being seen by the group. Obviously, he wasn't a very smart vampire or else he would have noticed that there were two slayers among the group. "Joy, go ahead."

Joy shrugged and approached the vampire. She could feel the eyes of everyone watching her, waiting to see if she succeeded or if she failed. A part of her felt a little nervous. What if she did fail? _I won't fail! _She convinced herself. _I've fought plenty of vampires, and I've never lost! Why would I fail now? _She tried to shake off her doubt as the vampire took its fighting stance.

"Do not force attack Joy, let it happen naturally." Giles coached.

Joy gritted her teeth, trying to ignore his lecturing as she tried to fight. The vampire took her as fresh meat and flashed his teeth before lunging towards her. Joy barely had time to duck before Giles shouted out another 'suggestion'.

"Defense is just as important as offense!"

She tried to control her rising irritation at his constant tips. She knew how to fight! She was only here to oblige their uncertainty about her abilities. The vampire lunged again and this time she lunged back, surprising the creature and managing to knock him off his feet. Joy pounced on the fallen vampire, pinning him to the ground and proceeded to attack him with a series of ferocious punches to his face. When the vampire tried to throw her off of him she took a fierce hold on his shirt collar and began shoving his head into the ground. She repeatedly pulled him up and forced him back down, smashing the back of the vampire's head into the hard dirt beneath him.

The group had grown suddenly very quiet as she continued to brutalize the vampire. She could have staked him a while ago, but she preferred to give him pain. Or maybe she just wanted to prove to the group that she could cause pain.

"Is that enough offense for you?" Joy demanded, taking a quick glance towards her so-called watcher. He looked shocked at her behavior. She pulled a stake out of the back pocket of her jeans where she had stored it and quickly dusted the squirming vampire. When he had dissapeared, she stood and brushed the remains of dust off of her stomach-bearing, white halter. She noticed the dissaproving frown on Giles's face and sighed. "Now what?"

"Was that really neccessary Joy?" Giles questioned.

"Excuse me?" Joy returned the sharpened stick to its pocket. "Killing the evil creature? Yea, I think it was necessary!"

"That is not what I was addressing Joy," Giles corrected her sarcasm.

Buffy cut in to assist the struggling watcher. "Joy, why did you beat on him for so long before staking him?"

"It was a fight! That's what happens in fights, we beat each other up and then I kill him." Joy wasn't losing her sarcasm. "Isn't that how you fight demons, Buff?"

"Usually I just stake them and get it over with. It's not about the battle, Joy," Buffy explained. "Your focus shouldn't be on how badly you can beat him up before you dust him, you should focus only on how quickly you are able to kill the vampire. If you waste too much time with unnecessary fighting you could become too distracted..."

Giles interrupted. "And distraction is a weakness."

"Whatever," Joy rolled her eyes. She could tell that Giles was about to speak again and so she quickly cut him off. "Look, Buff can fight her way and I'll fight mine, okay? It doesn't make a difference so why does it matter. The vampires get dusted all the same!"

"Joy, that's not the point..." Buffy tried to make the new slayer understand.

"Come on Buffy," Joy cut her off, "You have to realize that I'm not you. I'm nothing like you and I never will be. That includes the way we fight."

Buffy was silent. "Fine. You're right. I can't persuade you to be like me, but I just wish that you'd at least pretend to listen to our instructions. I know that you're a good fighter, but there's just some stuff that you need to learn. Remember, I've been doing this a lot longer than you have." Buffy looked at Giles. "I'm going home. It's dead tonight." She grinned. "No pun intended." She turned to Joy. "You should get home too. Get some rest. We'll do this again tomorrow, okay?"

Joy shrugged. "Sure, I'll see you tomorrow." She started walking away from the slayer and watcher. "Goodnight."

"Joy, do you want me to walk home with you?" Buffy asked quickly as the young girl began heading towards the opposite end of the graveyard. "Just in case you run into any trouble on the way."

Joy shook her head. "That isn't necessary Buffy. I'll be fine on my own. See you tomorrow." They didn't stop her. They realized that she would have to become comfortable with them in her own time and until then she was definitely choosing to remain an independent and stubborn young woman.

_Can they be any more controlling? _Joy whined to herself as she headed home. She hadn't driven that night since they had met at the cemetery instead of at the Summers' house like before. She had chosen to walk to the cemetery in order to clear her head before training with her new watcher. _I'm a good fighter! I get the job done, I don't know why they have to complain and try to change me! _She hated being told what to do. _They don't understand me. They don't accept me. _She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't notice the approaching footsteps creeping up on her from behind. A hand touched her bare shoulder and she screamed in surprise, pulling her stake instinctively from her pocket and spinning around in defense.

"Angel!" She gasped as he caught her arm before she managed to stab him with her pointy weapon. "What are you doing here?"

"Nice to see you too."

"Sorry," Joy smiled. "I wasn't expecting to see you tonight. You know I'm always glad to see you though." She sighed. "I was just a little distracted."

"You were very distracted, Joy," Angel agreed. "I've been able to sneak up on you a few times before but I've never made you scream before!" He frowned. "Is everything alright?"

Joy nodded. "Sure."

"What were you doing out here?"

She sighed. "Umm...nothing really..."

"You were with Buffy weren't you?"

Joy nodded. She couldn't lie to Angel. "I agreed to let Giles train me." She quickly tried to explain, hoping that Angel wouldn't be angry about her finding a new teacher. "I still want you to train me too, Angel, I'm not trying to replace you or anything, but Dawn begged me and..."

"It's fine Joy, you don't have to explain yourself to me." Angel interrupted her. "I think it's good that you've agreed to take on a watcher. There's only so much I can teach you."

"Good," She smiled. "I'm glad you're okay with it." She realized that she was still holding her stake and so she returned it to her pocket. "So, what's up tonight? Are you going to take me out to train?"

"Haven't you already done enough training for tonight?" Angel asked with a knowing grin.

"Come on Angel," Joy laughed. "You know I'm always up for more fighting!" She sighed and tried to pout. "Of course, I could just go home though. It is late, and way past my bedtime!"

"That could be a good idea," Angel pretended to be finished with the conversation.

"No Angel! Please don't make me go home now!" Joy knew that she'd have to go home eventually, but she couldn't help trying to avoid her aunt and uncle as long as possible. "We don't have to train, we can go get some coffee or something..."

Angel smiled, "We could but it's late or early actually, in fact it's almost sunrise. You should probably get home and try to get some sleep before you have to go to school."

Joy sighed. "Yea, you're probably right. I still have some homework to get done too..." She rolled her eyes. "Whatever, like I'd actually go home and do homework right now." She grinned at Angel's frown. "It's fine, I've got home room first period tomorrow, I can take care of my homework then! I promise!"

"Joy, you know how important I think your training is, but I also think your schoolwork is just as important. I don't want you falling behind."

"I know, you're very sweet, and _very _concerned about my future." Joy glanced at her watched and her eyes widened in surprise at how late it was. "Okay, so maybe I should be going home. When are we going to train together next?"

"Whenever you can. Are you meeting the scoobies again tomorrow?"

"Yea, I'm supposed to. I don't have to though if you wanted to meet." She quickly added.

Angel grinned. "Why don't you go ahead and train with them tomorrow." He shrugged. "I think it might be time for Giles to take over your training." Joy's face instantly melted. "I'll still be around to fight with you, whenever you want."

"I still need you Angel," Joy confessed. "I know I'm not usually the girl to need somebody, but...I really don't want to lose you yet Angel." She stared down at her feet. "You're one of the only friends I have, Angel. You're the only person that appreciates me!"

"I'm sure that's not true, Joy. Dawn's your best friend, and what about your aunt and uncle?"

Joy smirked. "Yea, they're great at being appreciative." She rolled her eyes. "Anyway, Angel, all I'm trying to say is that you mean a lot to me. You've been incredible in helping me, and I'm still not really sure why." Her eyes started tearing and she quickly became embarassed. "God, what's wrong with me!" She tried to laugh off her tears. "I'm like all of a sudden an emotional mess, and that's so not me!" The tears kept coming and she couldn't force them back. "Damn!"

Angel frowned and pulled her into his arms. He didn't speak. He didn't know what was wrong with the young slayer, but he didn't care. She needed comfort and reassurance. That is something that he could give her, he hoped. And so he held her in his arms, slowly rubbing her back, and let her cry until she had ran out of tears.

"I'm so sorry, Angel," Joy sniffed. "I don't know what's wrong..." Her hands were clutching his jacket like a little girl would cling to her mother after waking up from a nightmare.

He tried to quiet her, "Don't apologize, Joy." He continued to hold her. "Come on now, tell me what's going on."

She shook her head. "I don't know." Suddenly she pulled away from him and wiped away any remains of tears and cleared her throat. "I'm fine, I really am." She forced a smile. "I better get home and get to bed. I'll see you later." She started to turn to leave.

"Wait!" Angel grabbed her hand to stop her. "Why won't you tell me what's bothering you?"

"Nothing's bothering me, Angel," Joy insisted. "I'm tired and I have to be at school in only a couple hours!" She succeeded in wriggling her arm free from his grip. "Bye!" She took off at a run, eager to put distance between herself and Angel, who was no doubt watching her leave in confusion.

_He wouldn't understand. He couldn't understand. Of course maybe if I actually explained it to him, he could try to understand, but..._Joy started to cry again and she ran faster towards her house, desperate to be in the comfort of her bed. _Nobody can know. It's not their problem. I can and I will deal on my own. _


	25. Chapter Twenty Five

Chapter Twenty-Five: Unwanted Bonding 

"Again" Buffy shouted commands as Joy attacked the swinging punching bag. "Left, right, lunge, hold..." She kept up her shouting as Joy obediently followed each of the orders. They had been working out all night, at least three hours, but Joy wasn't complaining and she didn't stop. She had agreed to do whatever she was told and tonight that involved rigorous training. "Duck" Buffy joined the training and jump kicked over Joy's head.

"You don't have to tell me how to defend myself Buff" Joy exclaimed, stopping the kick by grabbing Buffy's ankle in her hand.

"Okay, fine, then let's see how you do." Buffy's instructions ceased and their 'battle' began. Buffy was surprised at how well Joy was able to keep up with her vigor and her strength. Joy quickly learned that she had over-rated her own ability and she was shocked at how hard she had to work to avoid Buffy's attacks. She was doing well though and she assumed that she would be able to defeat the almighty slayer, but just as her pride was rising, Buffy's offense overwhelmed her and before she realized what had happened, Joy found herself lying on her backside with Buffy pinning her down by holding a knife to Joy's throat. Joy gasped and frowned as she realized that she had lost.

"Wow, that was impressive" Joy sputtered as Buffy held out her hand to pull Joy to her feet.

"You weren't half bad yourself." Buffy felt a cut on her cheek and grinned. "Actually, you were pretty damn tough"

"Thanks" Joy stretched out her arm, trying to relax her newly sore limbs.

"So, you ready to go patrol now" Buffy led Joy back upstairs of the basement where the gym was set up.

Joy stopped in front of the hallway mirror to fix her mussed hair. "Sure, let's go." She glanced around the living room and noticed that the room was surprisingly empty. "Isn't anyone else coming with us"

"Giles is going to meet us there. He had to get a few supplies first." Buffy explained. "Riley might stop by later too, but he had some other things going on tonight, so that's not for sure yet." She shrugged.

"Oh yea, Riley, I haven't seen much of him around." Joy grinned. "What's the deal with him anyway? Are you two dating" Buffy smiled. "Or do you just wish the two of you were dating..."

"Well, it's not that easy..." Buffy sighed. "Never mind, it's not important. Let's go."

Joy rolled her eyes as she followed Buffy out of the house and down the street towards the cemetery. _I think I have a right to know! I mean she expects me to be all up front and honest with her and everything, and then she doesn't tell me a thing! That's real fair. _Joy complained in her thoughts the entire walk towards the vampire hangout, leaving an awkward silence in the air between the two slayers.

When the arrived at the graveyard, Buffy's instructions began.

"Now tonight, instead of beating on the undead for hours before actually staking them." Buffy suggested. "Seriously, just try it" She begged when she realized that Joy was about to protest. "Find your target and stake them. I'll time you"

Joy sighed. "I still don't see why it makes a difference" She pulled out her stake and started pacing through the rows of the graves.

"Come on Joy, just do it this once, for me" Buffy withdrew her own stake and kept an eye open as she let Joy explore the dark cemetery. Before Joy had a chance to explore far, they were joined by Giles.

"Good evening ladies" Giles greeted the slayers with a nervous smile.

"Hey Giles" Buffy smiled and motioned for him to be quiet. "Tonight we're letting Joy free. Neither of us are going to give her any instructions, okay" Giles nodded to Buffy. "If she wants to fight all night with a single vampire before actually killing it, then let her. It's all up to her tonight. I'm not saying anything, and neither are you"

"That is just fine, Buffy." Giles agreed.

Joy frowned. "Really? You're not going to be shouting from the sidelines, Rupert"

He shook his head.

"Cool" Joy returned to her careful exploration. She hadn't taken three steps when one of the fresh graves began to tremble and a pale, bony hand crept up through the soil. Joy waited patiently while the vampire unearthed itself. "Welcome back from the dead" She greeted the vampire with a mock grin.

The vampire growled. "I wasn't expecting a welcoming committee."

Joy shrugged. "Not so much a welcoming as a killing committee." She winked. "Ready to die...again" And the fight began. Of course Joy didn't heed any of Buffy's earlier instructions about a short fight. She was in the mood for a real battle and she had a feeling that this vampire could give her just that.

It began simple, obviously the vampire was still getting use to not being dead. Joy understood that and she took it easy on him at first. She didn't want to wear him out too fast, then there would be no enjoyment for her. A few punches, lunges, kicks...and then things became more aggressive. The vampire pounced on her, knocking her onto her back and she used her feet to toss him over her head, throwing the creature against a nearby tombstone. The marble stone cracked from the force. Joy leapt to her feet and continued the attack on the vampire.

Joy snuck a glance back at Buffy and Giles and she could tell that they were both getting frustrated. But she didn't stop the battle. She leapt on top of a tombstone and swung her leg around until it contacted with the vampire's face. He growled ferociously and jumped after, succeeding in pinning her to the ground and knocking the stake out of her hand. Still Joy continued to fight with him. She shoved him off of her and started a purely punching and kicking match.

Buffy couldn't hold back any longer. "Stop teasing him, Joy"

Joy ignored her and managed to pin the vampire against a tree. But instead of staking him right away like she should have, she began furiously punching him, smacking his head back against the tree trunk with every punch. She let the energy of the fight consume her, blocking out all of her surroundings as she pounded on the beast. Finally she broke a branch from the tree and drove it deep into the vampire's chest. Before she had a chance to remove herself from her tense and energetic high she was ripped from her unconscious reality as she felt someone lunge at her, grabbing her body and forcing her onto the ground. Joy's disillusioned fighting instantly turned to shock and a little bit of panic as she struggled against the strength holding her down.

"What the hell" She dug her knee hard into the stomach of her assailant and shoved him off of her. It only took her a moment to regain her abilities and in less than a second she had turned the attack onto her attacker, pouncing on top of him and holding his arms above his head. "Wait a minute..." She frowned as she recognized the body beneath her.

"Bloody hell lil' slayer" Spike glared at the tough girl straddling him. "Get off"

Joy didn't move. "What the hell were you doing, grabbing me like that" She was holding the tree branch-stake above his neck threateningly. She didn't plan on using it, considering Joy had no idea that Spike was actually a vampire.

"Get off" He shoved her off of him and she fell onto her back. Before she had a chance to scramble up to her feet, he had leapt onto her, holding her down to the ground. Joy couldn't hold back a small yelp in surprise.

Buffy came to their side and stared down at Joy. "See what happens when you lose yourself in the fighting." She smirked and motioned for Spike to let the younger slayer stand.

"God Buffy! I thought you were going to let me fight my own style without interfering" Joy sat up with a glare at Spike who had obligingly moved away from her.

"Sorry, but we had to make you understand" Buffy glanced back at Giles for support. "Giles and I thought it was the best way." She offered a hand to Joy but the younger girl refused and pushed herself up without help. "Come on Joy, don't be all pissy! We're only trying to help."

"I wish you'd stop helping" Joy yelled angrily. "I don't need your help! I'm here as a favor to you remember! I don't think I deserve all your annoying advice" Her voice was continually rising. "It's very offensive you know! If you gave me half a chance, I could be just a good a fighter as you" Buffy rolled her eyes. "See! That's exactly the type of attitude I mean! You're so quick to give me advice but you have no faith in me" She turned to leave. "I don't need this"

"Joy please wait" Buffy called after her, trying to stop her.

As Joy headed away from the slayer, a vampire leapt out from behind a stone crypt and lunged towards Joy. Before Buffy had a chance to shout Joy a warning, the young slayer had avoided the lunge, retrieved her previously discarded stake and fiercely sent it flying through the air straight into the unexpecting vampire's chest. She looked over her shoulder to see Buffy and Giles in awed shock before returning to her direction away from them and fleeing from the graveyard.

"Damn" Buffy sighed after Joy had left them.

"If only she'd let us mold her fighting skills! She could be incredible" Giles agreed.

Spike took out a cigarette and lighter. "I told you the miniature slayer had talent." He grinned at the older slayer and the watcher. "Too bad you can't see it." He stuck the cigarette between his lips and returned the lighter to his pocket. "I've done my part." He turned to Giles. "Don't get used to asking for favors." And he disappeared into the darkness of the night, blending into the shadows of the trees and gravestones. In a moment he was gone.

"I don't get it." Buffy told Giles when they were alone. "She is an amazing fighter, I don't see why she won't apply herself more"

Giles agreed"She does not seem to have the desire to excel." He shrugged. "We will do our best to train her, and perhaps in time she will come around."

"Let's hope so." Buffy agreed.

"Joy, over here" Dawn called to Joy from across the room at the Bronze the next night. She was perched on a high stool at a table with Colin.

Joy glided through the crowded room, weaving gracefully in and out of the dancing and partying masses. She arrived at the table and smiled politely at her friends. "What's up" Joy took a sip of Dawn's drink and looked around the room. "Is Blake here"

Colin shook his head. "I don't think he could make it tonight. He said he had some family thing going on."

Joy frowned. "Right, family stuff." _He never does family stuff! _She added to herself.

"Sit down Joy" Dawn offered, pointing to the empty seat. Colin nodded.

"Umm..." Joy glanced around again. She hated to intrude on her friends' date, but she hated even more to be alone on a Friday night. She had assumed that Blake would be hanging around after the game like all of his teammates, so she had hurried over to the Bronze as soon as the game was over. She hadn't even changed first. "Thanks for the offer, but I think I'll just go home."

"Don't be stubborn Joy" Dawn demanded. "Stay and have fun with us. We don't mind, and I don't want you to have to be home alone on a Friday night" Dawn looked to her boyfriend. "We're going to dance. Do you want to come with us Colin" She stood and took Joy's hand, leading her towards the crowded dance floor.

Joy didn't protest. She did want to dance. She loved to dance. Joy was an excellent dancer and everyone knew it. Dawn wasn't quite as talented on the dance floor but she did her best to keep up to Joy's movements. It was pretty much useless though. Joy's body was skilled and her arms were languid, she always seemed to know exactly how to move and when to move. Dawn ended up floundering along trying to match Joy's motions.

"You're not very good at clubbing are you Dawn" Joy laughed as the song changed to an even more upbeat song.

"Sorry, but not all of us can have the skills from _Dirty Dancing_" Dawn told her dancing friend.

Joy laughed. "Come on Dawn, you've just got to let loose. Don't force it so much" She took Dawn's hands and held them together with her own above their heads. "You've got to move with the music, let it control you" Joy closed her eyes and let the rhythm of the music flow through her body as she swayed her hips sultrily in tune with the song. "Relax Dawn! Just relax." Joy hummed along with the familiar song. Dawn watched Joy's every move and tried to mimic her. Her movements were jerky and short though. Joy noticed her struggle to keep up and smiled. She placed her hands on Dawn's hips and guided them slowly. "You've got to flow..." Joy whispered in Dawn's ear, moving closer. "Turn around and flow." Dawn turned around obediently and let Joy press their bodies together, leading Dawn's motions with her own body. "Now can you feel the music"

"Yea, I think I'm getting it now" Dawn giggled and took her own initiative letting her hands glide above her head and then back down her body.

Colin had noticed the girls' sexy dancing and didn't want to sit out any longer. He came over to them and took Dawn's hand, pulling her away from Joy. "It's my turn to dance with my girlfriend"

Joy laughed and watched Colin dance Dawn away. She didn't care that she was suddenly alone. She'd find someone soon enough. Or rather, someone would find her. They always did at places like this. The next song's speed picked up and Joy's dancing speed picked up in rhythm. Her eyes remained shut as she bounced, twirled, and swayed to the band's music. A moment later her solitary dancing was interrupted as an arm slipped around her waist.

"I noticed from across the room" his voice sounded familiar. "You're hot. I thought you could use some company."

"Well, thanks for noticing" Joy slowly turned around to face the intruder. She gasped when she recognized his face.

"Oh...bollocks" Spike instantly removed his hands from her body and stepped away from her. "I didn't realize it was you, slayer" he spat out the word 'slayer' as though he had just tasted bad wine.

"Does that take my 'hotness' down a few notches" Joy asked sarcastically.

"Oh bloody hell" He seemed disgusted at his previous compliment. He headed towards the bar. She followed him. "Go on, get away from me, slayer"

"What's the matter, Spike? Embarrassed for flirting with me" Joy sighed. "You know, you're not the only guys who's hit on me while I've been dancing." She tossed her long hair behind her shoulder. "Hell, I've even been hit on by girls! So you don't need to be embarrassed at all." She smiled. "I'm used to the attention."

"You're not very modest are you, gidget" Spike grinned down at the short slayer.

"I don't like to be called that." Joy decided.

"Sorry, can't help myself, gidget." Spike arched an eyebrow. "You're just so little."

"I'm not either" Joy tried standing up taller, but even with her stiletto heels on she was short in comparison to Spike. "Anyway, I could take you in a fight any day."

"Don't threaten me with something you can't follow through." Spike ordered a beer from the bartender.

"I'll have one too." Joy told the bartender.

He frowned at her. "Got any ID"

Spike waited with a mocking grin. "Yea gidget, got any ID"

"Not on me. This outfit doesn't exactly have pockets." She indicated her cheer uniform and then realized her mistake. "Right, high school cheer outfit, fine, whatever." She turned away from the bartender and Spike and returned to the dance floor.

A moment later Spike was at her side again. "We could still dance if you wanted to, gidget." He suggested, drinking the bottle of beer an inch from her face.

"No thanks." Joy watched him for a moment before grabbing the bottle away from him and taking a drink.

"Hey" He took the bottle back. "I'm not going to be responsible for underage drinking, got it? The slayer would kill me if she found out."

"It was one sip" Joy argued. "You're as uptight as she is"

"Am not"

"Are too"

Spike frowned and handed her the half empty bottle. "Suit yourself." She drank with satisfied victory. "I'm not uptight" He insisted sulkily. "This music blows."

"Seriously." Joy agreed.

Spike looked at her in surprise. "You're not a typical high schooler are you" She shook her head. "That's good. High schoolers are all bloody sheep. Crowd followers." He shrugged. "It's better not to follow the crowd, I always say."

"So I should be listening to Spike's words of wisdom" Joy questioned.

"Hell no! I haven't got any words of wisdom." He smirked as she finished off the beer. "Just personal choices. But then again I'm not the best role model."

"You're not really any kind of role model Spike." She laughed. "I don't even know you very well and I can see that. God! My boyfriend's a better role model than you..."

"You've got a boyfriend" Spike cut her off with a tone of unmistakable surprise.

She glared at him. "Does that shock you"

"What? No, not at all! I should have assumed you had a boyfriend. I mean, you're a cheerleader"

"What's that supposed to mean" Joy exclaimed. "Do you have something against cheerleaders? Because you know, I didn't want to be a cheerleader, it's not like I've spent my whole life trying to become a high school cheerleader! It's not exactly my thing! In fact, I've been thinking about dropping cheer..."

"Joy, stop" Spike tried to calm her down. "I didn't mean anything negative by it! You shouldn't drop cheerleading, I think it could definitely be your thing! You've got the energy and you've got the athletic ability. I was just pointing out that cheerleaders usually have boyfriends, he's probably a jock, huh"

Joy sighed. "Yes, he's a jock."

Spike grunted. "Well, good for him. And for you. I bet the two of you make a real cute couple, with your matching red and gold uniforms and your lovely little high school lives, where nothing would ever go wrong, 'cause you're bloody Barbie and Ken"

Joy was fuming. She shoved the empty bottle into his hands and stormed out of the Bronze.


	26. Chapter Twenty Six

Chapter Twenty-Six: Disposable Girlfriends

"Come on Blake, I need to study." Joy insisted, pushing her boyfriend's wandering hands away from her body.

"You've been studying all night babe, give it a rest" Blake started nibbling at Joy's ear. "Besides, why do you even care about studying? I thought you hated school" He snapped her History book shut and shoved it off the table.

"Blake" Joy gave an exasperated sigh, pushed her chair away from the table and stood. "I can't handle you right now" She quickly gathered her books from the table and stuffed them into her bag. "When you feel mature enough to have me come over to study, then give me a call, but until then I'm going have to finish my homework alone at my own house."

"Come on baby doll" Blake reached for her hand. "You can study later! Right now, my parents are gone and we have the whole house to ourselves for the whole night if you wanted to stay..." He stood and drew her into his arms. "Don't you want to stay with me tonight" He kissed her neck. "I think we could have a pretty good time, don't you"

Joy rolled her eyes. "Blake, I'm not your baby doll, okay"

Blake grinned"Fine, have it your way, I'll call you whatever you want" He continued kissing her. "Just stay with me..." He put on his sweetest smile and kissed the tip of her nose. "Please"

Joy couldn't help but smile. He could be so cute when he tried, and there were times when she just couldn't say no to him. "If I agree to stay with you tonight, you have to promise me that I can have at least one hour to study in peace, without any distractions from you" She mock-glared at him. "Promise"

He nodded. "You can have two hours if you want! I'll make you dinner while you go and get all smart"

She laughed. "Fine. I'll stay"

"You won't regret it" Blake scooped her up into his arms and she gave into his passionate kissing for a few uninterrupted minutes before making him stop and begin dinner so she could finish her homework.

"Dawn I can't come tonight" Joy spoke quietly into the phone.

"What do you mean you can't come Joy" Dawn replied. "You promised Buffy that you'd come tonight! They've been waiting for you for a half an hour"

"I know, I'm sorry, but I can't make it tonight" Joy realized her voice had gotten louder and she quickly lowered it. "Please apologize to your sister for me. I didn't mean to make her wait for me, but something's come up."

"Where are you Joy? And why are you whispering" Dawn asked suddenly.

"Umm..." Joy hesitated. She peeked into the bedroom through the slightly opened crack of the bathroom door. Blake was sleeping soundly, tangled up in the quilts of his king size bed. She sighed. "I'm with Blake."

"What" Dawn gasped. "It's after midnight! Don't his parents care that you're staying so late"

"His parents aren't home." Joy explained slowly. "He asked me to stay the night with him."

"And you agreed"

"He asked so nicely, I couldn't just say no" Joy felt the need to defend. "He is my boyfriend, after all..."

"I thought the two of you were having problems." Dawn said.

"Well, what better way to help our problems than to spend a night together, right" Joy decided. "Besides, we've been together for a few months and we hadn't slept together yet. I figured it was about time."

Dawn gasped again. "Joy, I'm not sure that's the best reason to sleep with a guy"

"He's not just a guy Dawn, he's my boyfriend" Joy's voice was rising again. "I've got to go Dawn, I don't want to wake him up."

"Joy, come on" Dawn tried to talk some sense into her best friend. "Last week you didn't even want to go on a date with Blake and now you're spending the night with him! I don't understand you"

"You don't have to understand me Dawn" Joy was getting bored of having to explain her actions to her best friend. "Please apologize to Buffy and Rupert for me and tell them that I promise to come tomorrow night, okay? I have to go" she heard rustling coming from the bed and peeked out of the bathroom again. Blake had turned onto his back, his arms were stretched above his head. "Blake's waking up, I have to go! Bye Dawn." Joy hung up the phone. She glanced in the mirror quickly to smooth down her hair before returning to the bedroom.

Blake yawned and pushed himself up onto his elbows. He squinted in the dark bedroom. "What're you doing babe" He pulled back the covers and patted the space in bed next to where he was laying.

"I had to use the bathroom" Joy told him, strolling over to the side of the bed. "Did you miss me" Sleeping with Blake was funner than she had anticipated. She didn't know why she had waited for so long.

"Yea I missed you" He reached for her wrist and pulled her into bed. "Is this my shirt" He tugged at the baggy button-up shirt she had on.

"I got cold" Joy explained with a giggle.

"Couldn't you have put on your own clothes, Joy"

She laughed. "Sure I could have, but your shirt smells better" She kissed his bare chest. "You don't mind do you"

"No, it's just, that's my favorite shirt! It's also my nicest shirt" Blake explained. "I'd rather you didn't wear it."

Joy pulled back at his unusually harsh tone. "Okay...I didn't think it'd bother you so much" She quickly unbuttoned the shirt and tossed it on the ground. "Is that better" she asked sarcastically.

Blake instantly returned to his playful mood. "Yea, much better" He wrapped his arm around her bare waist and pulled her close to his body. "Now, where were we" He started kissing her shoulders.

"Actually, you were asleep." Joy wasn't in the mood to play anymore. _He is so bi-polar! _

"Well, I'm awake now" He nuzzled her neck with his nose.

"And I'm kind of tired now, Blake" Joy rolled over so that her back was turned towards him.

"Come on, one more time"

"Not right now Blake" She muttered. "I'm tired. Let's go to sleep."

"Joy, I thought we had a deal" Blake sat up in bed and rolled her over to look at him. "I let you have two hours to study, and I made you dinner, and I even let you choose the movie for tonight, and in case you didn't notice I'm not exactly a huge fan of Audrey Hepburn"

"What are you trying to say, Blake" Joy pulled the covers up under her chin. She didn't like how her boyfriend was looking at her.

"You owe me, Joy"

"I don't owe you anything" Joy laughed. "This is a mutual relationship, Blake. I shouldn't have to owe you sex" She frowned. "God, you act like you own me or something"

"We had a deal, Joy! I've waited for you to stop being so moral now for almost six months! It's never taken a girl that long to give herself to me" He grinned proudly. "Usually it only takes one date"

"Well, excuse me for having standards." Joy exclaimed angrily. "I'm not a slut Blake! I assumed you would have realized that"

"I did realize that Joy, I'm not trying to say that you're anything like that, but..."

"Yes you are" Joy pressed. "By saying that I 'owe' you, you're basically calling me your whore! Or your bitch, I'm not sure which. But, I'm not either of those things! Got it"

"Yea, I got it! Geez, why're you so uptight tonight" Blake tried to calm down his fiery girlfriend. "I didn't mean to offend you."

"Whatever" Joy laid back down and rolled over onto her stomach. "I'm going to sleep."

Blake was silent. He was annoyed and he definitely wasn't satisfied, but he was silent. He let her fall asleep and then in the worst mood he had possibly ever been in, Blake eventually fell asleep as well.

"That was so not the night it was suppose to be" Joy complained to Dawn the next day in homeroom. It was the last period of the day and so far Joy had managed to keep her emotions covered up. "He was a complete jerk"

Dawn had her headphones on and she was doing her best to ignore Joy's whining.

"Aren't you listening to me"

"Sorry, should I be" Dawn asked sarcastically. "I'm sorry if I just don't care about your non-magical night of romance." Joy frowned at her friend. "You bailed on us, Joy"

"Look, I'm sorry I couldn't come last night. I already explained all that to you" Joy didn't see why this was such a big deal for you. Your sister's the slayer, it shouldn't effect you" Joy pulled out her cell phone. "If it's going to bother you that bad though, I'll call her and make it better right now. Is she at home" Joy waited for Dawn's nod and then dialed Dawn's home number. Buffy didn't answer. "Well, she doesn't seem to be home, but tell her I'll be there tonight, okay"

Dawn shrugged. "Yea, sure."

"Dawn I'm sorry, okay, what else can I say" Joy sighed. "I seriously don't think I've ever apologized this much for one mess-up" She scribbled down an answer to her trigonometry homework. "And it was a mess-up, trust me. I know I've had my doubts about Blake, but I never realized that he could be such a bastard"

Dawn sighed and relented to listening to her best friend's complaints. "I'm sorry that things didn't go as well as you had hoped, Joy."

"It was my fault, I guess" Joy didn't really believe that but she didn't know what else to say. She couldn't admit that perhaps Dawn had been right. "I shouldn't' have made him wait so long"

"What" Dawn exclaimed. "You honestly think that things would be better between you two if you had slept with him months ago? That's twisted" She wrinkled her nose. "You wanted Blake's respect, besides you're not a slut, your _boyfriend _just needs to realize that! If you ask me, he's the sleaze." She noticed Joy's pout. "Joy, what's up? You've never worried about pleasing him before. Usually you care only about yourself, and I mean that in a good way even though I know it sounded rude..." Dawn bit her lip.

"I know what you meant." Joy assured her friend. "So, do you think I was wrong to sleep with him at all"

Dawn shrugged. "I don't really like to judge, Joy. What you decide to do in your life with your relationships is completely up to you. Besides, we're not exactly on the same level when it comes to guys, you know."

"What do you mean" Joy asked. She assumed she knew Dawn's status with her boyfriend, but they had never exactly confronted the subject.

"You know that I haven't exactly done much with guys..." Dawn stated. "I mean, Colin and I haven't ever done the sort of things that you and Blake do. And I haven't done anything with any other guys either."

"I know that Dawn" Joy assured her friend. "I don't see why that's exactly relevant, though."

"I'm just saying that you've had more experience with me, I would never know how long you're supposed to wait in a relationship, or for that matter what age is good for a first time" Dawn smiled.

Joy frowned. "Umm...Dawn, Blake wasn't my first time"

Dawn hesitated"Oh, of course not, I mean, I assumed..."

"You thought that last night was my first" Joy grinned. "Wow, I've never realized that I portrayed the 'virginal' type." Joy laughed. "That's flattering, I guess."

"Have you slept with a lot of guys" Dawn asked slowly. "I'm sorry, that's none of my business"

Joy was surprised at Dawn's blunt question but she supposed it was about time for that conversation to be brought up. "I'm not a slut or anything Dawn."

"I know that" Dawn exclaimed. "I never thought that about you"

"Good, because I'm not" Joy shrugged. "My first time was about a year ago, with Henri."

"Oh, of course, I forgot how serious the two of you were."

"It was weird at first, you know, I worried that I was too young or that I wasn't ready, but after a while it just became regular and sweet." Joy shrugged. "I'm sort of surprised I made Blake wait for so long actually. Whatever, we did it now, and I kind of wish I hadn't."

"Because he was a jerk" Dawn had always known that Blake was the jerk type. She had known him for a lot longer than Joy had. But she did have hopes for his turning around when he had started dating Joy.

"Not just a jerk, but a complete bastard" Joy shook her head. "I should have known better! He's never been steady, he's always changing his mind about things. I never know what he's thinking or how he's going to respond to things." She sighed. "He's a crappy boyfriend, or maybe I'm a crappy girlfriend. I don't know anymore" Her eyes started tearing. "Why am I being so emotional! God, this whole week I've been an emotional wreck! It's got to be PMS or something, but still" Joy wiped at her eyes trying not to let anyone else see her tears.

"Joy calm down" Dawn took her friend's hand comfortingly. "You're a great girlfriend, and I'm sure that Blake doesn't mean to be such a crappy boyfriend..." she grinned and Joy smiled. "You guys are just having a difficult time with your relationship right now, but I'm sure you'll be able to work things out eventually."

Joy sighed. "I'm sure you're right" she added softly. "I hope."

"Okay, that's it! Forget training tonight, you are in need of some fun" Dawn glanced at the clock and started packing her homework up in her book bag. "In a few more minutes the bell is going to ring and we are going to haul ass out of this stifling school and prepare for a night of partying" Joy tried to smile but she couldn't let herself be as lighthearted as Dawn was. Dawn noticed her apprehension. "Joy, come on, it's Friday, you don't have cheer practice, and we're going to celebrate without any worries about boyfriends."

Joy nodded"Fine." She followed suit in packing up her schoolwork. The bell rang and the girls bounded out of the classroom and down the hall. "I just have to make a quick stop at my locker, okay" Dawn followed Joy until the young slayer came to a sudden stop.

"What's wrong, Joy" Dawn came to her friend's side to see what had stopped her.

"I don't understand...I thought that he..." Joy lost whatever she was trying to say. A few yards in front of them Blake was leaning against the lockers, bracing himself with his hands against the metal, and his arms were positioned on either side of a girl. Joy couldn't tell who it was at the moment, but she could hear the giggle and she could see the grin on Blake's face. Joy felt sick. "But last night we..."

"Maybe it's not what it looks like, Joy" Dawn tried to comfort Joy.

At that moment, Blake leaned into the girl against the lockers and their lips meshed together.

"Yea, I'm sure it's nothing." Joy rolled her eyes.

"I'm sorry, Joy" Dawn gasped at the display in front of them. "He's such a jerk" Blake moved his arm enough for the girl to be identified and she shook her head. "Katie, of course. We should have known it was her! She's such a skank"

Joy shook her head. "It's not her fault, I'm sure. It's Blake. He's the loser. She's just the pathetically dumb cheerleader who doesn't know any better."

"Do you want to beat him up? Because if it would make you feel better, you can. I won't tell anybody." Dawn suggested.

Joy was still trying not to cry but Dawn's suggested made her smile. She shook her head. "No, he's not worth it." In the next moment though the girls witnessed Blake's hand take its place on Katie's backside as he went in for another kiss. "You know what? Screw it! He's worth every drop of blood I'm going to wring out of him" Without waiting for Dawn's response, Joy rushed forward and grabbed onto her boyfriend's arm. She yanked him away from Katie and through him hard against the lockers along the opposite wall.

"Joy" Blake's eyes widened at his girlfriend's rage. "What're you doing here..."

"You mean here at school? Or here breaking up your little make-out fest with Katie" She was screaming and every student in the halls had their eyes on her.

"Joy, calm down, baby..."

"I am not your baby" Joy punched him hard in the face, a little harder than she had intended, and blood instantly spurted from his nose.

"Bitch" Blake yelped as he covered his obviously broken nose with his hands.

"And I'm definitely not your bitch" She punched him hard in his stomach, causing him to double over in pain.

"Joy! Stop it" Katie was screaming hysterically. "Leave him alone"

Joy spun around and glared at Katie hatefully. The redheaded cheerleader instantly silenced and cowered away from the ferocious blonde.

Blake tried to defend himself verbally. "It wasn't what you think, Joy" He lied. "We were just talking! Come on sweetheart, you know I really care about you"

"Like hell you do" Joy punched him again and he shrieked. "In case you aren't smart enough to figure it out, we are so over" She kicked him one last time before storming off down the hallway, pushing past all the staring students. "Dawn are you coming" She called over her shoulder to her friend.

"Right behind you" Dawn was trying not to laugh as she passed the whimpering jock and caught up to Joy. "Do you have any idea how much trouble you're going to be in for that" She whispered as they tiptoed past the principle's office and ran outside towards the parking lot.

"I've been in trouble before" Joy shook her head as tears burned her eyes. They weren't exactly sad tears though, the truth was she couldn't care less about losing Blake. They were more tears of hate or at least anger. She couldn't stand the way she had let him play her.

"Joy" Dawn tried to catch up with her friend's fast pace. "Wait up" Dawn managed to catch up with the speedy slayer as she fumbled with her car keys. "Joy" Dawn stopped her.

"What" Joy shouted. She didn't mean to reply so loud or so harshly, but she was so upset that she couldn't help it. "I'm sorry, I mean what" She asked more softly.

"Are you okay, Joy" Dawn asked with genuine concern.

Joy took a deep breath. "I'm fine, Dawn."

"Well, you know, I was just asking because you just beat the crap out of your boyfriend back there, and that's not something that happens everyday" Dawn reminded her best friend.

"I'm fine, Dawn" Joy shook her head. "And he is not my boyfriend" Her eyes were watering, but Dawn couldn't tell if it was with sadness or anger.

"Alright, we're going to my house and we are having a serious girls' night." Dawn decided, going around to the passenger side of Joy's car.

"I'm not sure if..." Joy started to protest.

"Nope! I don't want to hear any of your excuses. Whether you like to admit it or not, you're going through something tough right now and you need your best friend to cheer you up. And, I know you're not my sister's biggest fan, but if there's anyone who has experience on bad break-ups, it's her." Dawn persuaded.

Joy nodded. "Fine. I'll go with you, but I'm not in the mood for any of your sister's training talks."

"Deal" Dawn smiled. "I'll make sure she is aware of that."

"This sucks." Joy decided as she drove out of the school and towards the Summers' house. "I never thought I'd be running to your sister for cheering up."


	27. Chapter Twenty Seven

Chapter Twenty-Seven: Settling Slayer

"Okay so my theory...guys are scum. Boys, men, it doesn't matter, their all the same! Guys are scum and we're better off without them!" Buffy stated officially, digging her spoon deep into her bowl of chocolate ice cream. "I mean honestly, what's the use for them? Sure, they can make us feel all special and loved for a while, but ultimately, what's the point? In the end they're just going to leave us alone and upset. We're better off without them though..."

Joy laughed at the slayer's rambling. "I imagine you're speaking from experience." She stuffed a handful of popcorn into her mouth.

Buffy bit her lip with a silly grin, "Well, maybe just a little."

"Buffy has the worst record of guys that I know of!" Dawn decided.

"Thanks, sis!" Buffy rolled her eyes. "Yours isn't all that great either, as little as that past is." She laughed. "Remember vampire boy?"

"Oh, like I'm the only one that's ever fallen for a vampire!" Dawn retorted.

"We're so not going there!" Buffy protested.

"Excuse me?" Joy spoke up. "Buffy's been with a vampire?" Her eyes grew wide. "How? I mean why? When?"

Buffy hesitated, "Well, that's a very long story, for another night..."

"Oh no! Tonight's all about cheering me up, and I think hearing about your past screwed up relationships could be very cheering for me." Joy grinned. "Tell me all about it!"

Buffy glared at Dawn. "Way to go Dawn!"

"Sorry, but she's right. If the two of you are going to ever get along as slayer companions, I think Joy has a right to know about your past. Including your boyfriends." Dawn shrugged.

"Fine..." As Buffy started to give in Willow entered the living room from the kitchen, carrying a large plate of gooey chocolate chip cookies.

"I've brought more comfort food!" She smiled and set the plate down on the table. Tara followed behind her girlfriend with another bag of popcorn.

"Good! Buffy was just about to tell me about her past history with a vampire lover." Joy announced, taking a bite of the warm cookies and letting it melt in her mouth.

"Really? Well, we came at just the right time." Willow made herself comfortable with pillows and blankets on the floor and Tara curled up next to her. Joy and Dawn were sharing the couch and Buffy was sitting across from them in an overstuffed chair.

Buffy sighed and opened a can of soda. "So, first you have to realize that it was a long time ago, it was actually my first year that I knew I was a slayer. I was a sophomore in high school, and he was so amazing!"

"He was a vampire, Buffy!" Joy interrupted.

"Hey, this is my story!" Buffy frowned. "Besides, I didn't know he was a vampire at first. He looked completely normal. He looked incredible! He was strong and handsome, and he made me feel so cared for. He was the first person that made me really accept my destiny. He helped me realize the importance of being a slayer. For a while I thought he was a watcher, but then I realized that he didn't even know Giles." She smiled as she remembered their first meeting. "I kept running into him at strange times, usually when I was in a fight. He always seemed to be around to help me when I needed him. Without even realizing it, I started falling for him. And then one night he was at my house, it was after a serious fight, and we kissed, and then all of a sudden I saw that he was a vampire! God, was I surprised! Well, at first of course I didn't want to be around him. He was a vampire, I was the slayer, it was obvious what would have to happen. But then we talked and he told me why he was different."

"Buffy, vampire's aren't different. They are all blood thirsty fiends!" Joy interrupted again.

Buffy raised her eyebrow, "My story!" She reminded the young slayer. Joy nodded in apology and let Buffy continue. "He told me that he had a soul." She waited for Joy's response, but she was silent. "He was cursed by a gypsy years ago. She gave him a soul, which is something that vampire's don't have. That's how vampires can kill so carelessly, they don't feel it. But he did. He felt everything with his soul. He hadn't killed a human in like a century! He couldn't. He didn't want to. So basically, he was a vampire that was working for redemption. He fought on the side of good." Buffy explained. "And he could have feelings and emotions. He could love. And he did love. I loved. We loved each other so much..." Her eyes had started to water but she blinked back the tears and continued. "We were together until my graduation, and then he left. He knew that we couldn't be together forever. Life wouldn't let us. No matter how much we loved each other, we couldn't be together, so he went to LA and I have only seen him a couple times since." She finished her story with a hopeless sigh. "Angel was my first love, and at times I wonder if he was my only love."

Joy sat up straighter. "Angel?" _It couldn't be him! It has to be a different person. Angel's not a vampire! Then again, how many guys are named 'Angel'? But...no way!_ She tried to convince herself that he wasn't the same guy. "What did he look like?"

Buffy smiled. "He was very good looking!" She giggled. "Tall, brown hair, brown eyes...I don't know, he was handsome!"

Joy shook her head. _It's not him! It can't be him! He did say he knew Buffy though..._"And he doesn't kill humans?"

"Nope, he's a innocent as a puppy." Buffy shrugged. "But enough about my past...let's hear something about yours. I think it's only fair."

Joy sighed. "Well, my past isn't quite as romantic as yours, it's a little more depressing I'm afraid." She took another cookie. "You already know that my parents died last year." She said softly. "And I'm not the best at holding down a relationship. Before I left LA, I broke up with my boyfriend, Henri, and now Blake." She shrugged, trying not to think about Henri too much. She couldn't tell the girls the truth about what happened with him. That was her own pain.

"Right, well, I think that's enough of your damn depressing life!" Buffy tried to lighten the mood. "Let's move on to Miss-first-kiss-was-a-vampire!" She nodded to Dawn.

"Really?" Joy grinned. "It must run in the family."

Dawn laughed but Buffy frowned.

"What's the deal with Spike?" Joy asked suddenly.

Buffy tried to act oblivious. "Huh? What about him?"

"Come on, Buffy, while we're being all honest here," Joy had to know his story. "I know the two of you have some sort of past. Were you dating?"

"Umm, not exactly." Buffy bit her lip. "Nothing was ever official with us..."

"So, you were just sleeping together then?" Joy asked.

Buffy blushed. "Yea, so moving on..."

"That wasn't one of Buffy's high points!" Willow explained. "Spike and her didn't have the best relationship. It was more a sort of relationship of convenience. Riley had just left and Spike also sort of needed someone, so they sort of got together."

"Thanks Willow!" Buffy rolled her eyes at her too-honest best friend. "Well, it's basically like she said." Buffy agreed. "Spike was there when I needed comfort, and that's all there really was to it!" She threw a couch pillow at Willow. "Anyway, let's see...we've thoroughly damaged talking about my love life as well as Joy's and Dawn's, I think Willow's and Tara's are obvious..." She winked at the cuddling witches. "What do we do now?" Buffy opened a package of red vines.

Dawn slumped farther down on the couch, "I say we watch a movie and fall asleep!" She glanced at the clock on the wall. "It's after midnight and I'm so tired!"

Willow and Tara agreed.

Buffy sighed and searched through the DVDs they had rented for the evening. "Are we in the mood for tragic romance or girls on the warpath?" She questioned.

"Warpath definitely!" Dawn decided.

"Alright, _Heartbreakers _it is then." Buffy put in the movie and returned to her seat.

Joy sighed and took a few pieces of licorice. "I'm not really in the mood to watch a movie." She glanced at Buffy shyly, "Actually, I'm kind of hyper, sort of in the mood to patrol." She stood and started stretching. "Wanna come with me?" She asked Buffy.

Buffy grinned, "Absolutely!" She jumped off her chair to join Joy. "Have fun with the movie, we'll probably be back in an hour or so, okay?" She clarified with the others. They all nodded and Buffy and Joy hurried out of the house. "I've got to say, I'm a little surprised that you wanted to go patrolling. I didn't think you were into it."

Joy grinned. "I'm always up for a good fight!"

"Yea, I can tell." Buffy laughed. "Hey, since tonight's been all about fun, what do you say we make slaying fun too?"

"How?"

"Umm," Buffy thought for a minute. "Let's make it a bet or a game or something, let's see who can slay the most vampires in one hour, okay?"

Joy nodded, "And the loser owes the winner..." she paused, unable to think of a good enough victory prize.

"Breakfast tomorrow!" Buffy suggested.

"Deal!" Joy smiled. "You better be able to make some pretty damn good French toast, 'cause that's my favorite!"

"Well, you better know how to make blueberry pancakes!" Buffy replied.

The two slayers laughed at their silliness and raced the rest of the way to the cemetery.

"Ready?" Buffy withdrew her stake and crept into the graveyard.

Joy held up her own wooden weapon and nodded. "Ready."

"One hour!" Buffy took off in one direction while Joy started going in the other.

"Good luck!" She called over her shoulder to the older slayer. Joy held her stake by her side as she began searching the dark cemetery for any movement. Luckily for the gambling slayers the graveyard was crawling with evil vermin that night and within minutes both girls were busy battling the undead. For once Joy didn't waste time with fighting. She attacked all the vampires that she found speedily and staked them without any procrastination. She was determined to prove to Buffy that she could be just as good of a slayer.

An hour later, as agreed the girls met back up at the entrance to the cemetery. Buffy arrived, grinning and brushing dust remains off of her jeans. Joy arrived only a second later, spinning her stake between her fingers and shaking the dust out of her long, straight hair.

"Well?" Joy smiled.

"Was it just me, or was the cemetery crowded with vamps tonight?" Buffy pulled her dark blonde hair up into a messy bun.

"Yea, seriously. I don't think I've ever seen so many vampires at once, maybe they were having a party!" Joy joked.

"Anyway, how'd you do?" Buffy asked with a raised eyebrow.

"How do I know you won't change the truth after you hear how many I staked?" Joy questioned, raising her own eyebrow mockingly.

Buffy sighed. "Fine," she pulled a piece of paper out of her back pocket and ripped in half. "Do you have something to write with?"

Joy stuffed her hands in the pockets of her red leather jacket and pulled out a tube of dark red lipstick. She handed it to Buffy.

"Okay, so we're both going to write down our numbers and then we'll show each other at the same time." Buffy decided, quickly scribbling something down on her half of the paper. She handed the other paper and the lipstick to Joy.

Joy scribbled down her own number and then returned the lipstick to her pocket. "Okay, ready?"

Both girls turned around their papers at the same time. Joy gasped. She had been so proud of herself, she never would have thought that Buffy could have beat her!

"Wow!" Buffy explained. "Nine is impressive for one night, especially on your own!"

"Yea, but you still won!" Joy commented. "And you keep forgetting that this isn't my first time on my own."

"I know, but after the training and everything," Buffy grinned. "You must not have wasted too much time on the fight tonight. I guess my advice paid off."

"Don't get too cocky, Buff," Joy rolled her eyes. "You only beat me by three."

"Yea, but I still get blueberry pancakes in the morning!" Buffy laughed and started heading back towards her house. Joy had to jog to catch up to the taller slayer.

"Shit!" Joy exclaimed as the bag of flour slipped out of her hands and exploded on the floor. She leaned around the wall to glance into the hallway, hoping no one was awake yet. She had made sure that she would be the first awake after their previous late night so she could make Buffy her victory pancakes. However, the kitchen had never been a comfortable place for Joy. She had trouble making macaroni and cheese. She hurriedly began scooping the flour of the floor and hiding it in the trash can. The pancake batter was already prepared and she had been in the process of cleaning up when she had made the mess. "I hate cooking!" She muttered bitterly.

"Uh, good morning." The kitchen door opened and Riley poked his head in.

Joy looked up from where she was kneeling on the floor, still cleaning. "Oh, hi, Riley, right?"

"Yea, you're Joy?" He waited for her nod before he entered the kitchen and closed the door. "Is Buffy here?"

"Umm, she's still asleep I think. We had sort of a late night." She explained, struggling to clean up the fine powder.

"Really? Girls' night?" He grinned.

"Yes actually," Joy stood and took a paper towel from the counter. "They were trying to cheer me up, and we went patrolling and I lost a bet and now I'm stuck making Buffy her blueberry pancakes, and let me just tell you that I suck at cooking!" She sighed. "But we made a deal and I plan on sticking to it." She scooped up a cup of the batter and poured it into the already heated pan on the stove. "So, what're you here for?"

"Well, I just wanted to stop by and see if Buffy wanted to go out for breakfast, but I see you've taken care of that." He joined Joy at the stove. "Do you want me to help you with the pancakes?" He winked. "We won't tell Buffy that you didn't make them by yourself."

"Thanks," Joy accepted his offer appreciatively. "I'll get out the syrup."

"So, last I heard you and Buffy weren't exactly getting along." Riley flipped the two pancakes and waited for the other side to cook. "What changed? If you don't mind my asking..."

Joy shrugged. "I don't know. I guess lately I've just been realizing that my life isn't as simple as I wanted it to be, and Buffy seems to be someone who can really understand how that feels. Plus, she's an incredible fighter!"

"She is that," Riley agreed. "Plate," He dropped the two cooked pancakes onto a plate that Joy handed him. "Just so you know, Buffy's been pretty upset about not having your trust."

"Really?" Joy asked with interest. "How do you know?"

"Well, believe or not but she talks about you a lot. Especially when you guys would come home from patrol. She talks about how she wished you would open up to her and how much she wants to help you." Riley explained, pouring more batter into the pan.

"Yea," Joy smiled. "I'm starting to realize that." She retrieved the orange juice from the fridge and pulled a few cups out of the cupboard.

"So, you said they were trying to cheer you up last night...why weren't you happy?" Riley asked.

"Umm," Joy hesitated. She didn't really know Riley and she wasn't sure if she wanted him to know too much about her life yet. "Well, it was a guy," She sighed. "No big deal really..." He didn't seem to believe her. "Okay, so I had sort of a bad breakup yesterday and I was in need of some girl time." She admitted. "Anyway, thanks for helping with breakfast!"

"Sure, anytime," Riley grinned and scooped two more pancakes onto the plate.


	28. Chapter Twenty Eight

Chapter Twenty-Eight: Confrontation

"Joy, what time are you coming over tonight?" Dawn asked Joy the following Monday after school.

"Umm, actually, I can't come over tonight." She noticed Dawn's frown and hurriedly tried to explain. "I know I said I would, but something came up! I'm sorry!" She gathered the books she needed for her homework from her locker. "Please apologize to Buffy from me."

"Joy, come on. Why can't you come?" Dawn persisted as she followed her friend.

Joy hesitated. She didn't want to tell Dawn the truth. She felt stupid, besides Dawn didn't understand how her life worked. Dawn didn't understand her aunt and uncle and what they put her through simply for hanging out with Dawn most everyday after school. If she didn't come home again...well, it was just wiser for Joy to say 'no' to Dawn and oblige her aunt and uncle. "I just can't okay?" Joy shook her head to make a point and left in a hurry.

"You're actually home on time today?" Dale greeted Joy as she came in through the front door.

She nodded, "Well cheer season's over and I'm not working today..."

He cut her off, clearly uninterested. "We're going out tonight." He started walking towards the kitchen and she wisely followed him. "Don't get any stupid ideas. We'll be home early."

"Okay," Joy replied blankly.

"You're going to stay home tonight and take care of all your chores that you've been slacking on lately, got it?" Dale ordered. "That means that you're not to have anyone come over and you're not to go out, okay? Stay home and clean up this damn house!"

"Don't worry so much Uncle Dale." Joy sighed and grabbed an apple from the fridge. "Go out and do your thing and don't worry about my night, okay?" She rolled her eyes and fled from her uncle's fierce stare, finding sanctuary in her bedroom. She didn't actually plan to stay home that night. That would have been torture for her. Lately she had been having way too much on her mind to stay home and clean. She needed to go out and take her mind off life.

Joy waited until she heard her aunt and uncle's car drive away before heading to the bathroom to take a shower and get ready to go out. At first she had considered going out to find Angel, but as she remembered what Buffy had said about him, Joy changed her mind not yet ready to confront the possibility of Angel being a vampire. So, she decided to go to the Bronze to dance away her worries. She dressed wildly in red leather pants and a black silk halter-top. She left her hair down and straightened it with a flat iron, making the choppy layers of severe red and black streaks stand out boldly against her long blonde hair.

When she was satisfied with her looks, Joy stepped into a pair of black, stiletto boots and hurried out to her car, driving speedily to the Bronze.

The hangout was crowded as usual, though nowhere near its wildly packed weekends. Joy briefly scanned the partiers, hoping not to encounter anyone from her school, especially Blake and Katie. Luckily, she didn't see anyone that she recognized and so she was able to relax a bit as she glided over to the dance floor, melting into the hypnotic musical beat. She danced alone for quite a while, but she didn't mind. She enjoyed dancing alone; it was definitely better than being a partner to any sleazy jerk who would have offered to dance with her. When she became bored of dancing, Joy strolled off the dance floor and ordered herself a soda from the bar and took it over to a high table to sit, again alone.

_I have to talk to Angel sooner or later. _Joy contemplated as she sipped her coke. _What if he is a...a vampire. That's insane! I can't believe Buffy, how could she actually have dated a vampire? She's a slayer! _She frowned, puzzled. _It couldn't have been the same Angel. There's no way that the Angel that's been training me is a vampire! _She debated silently for a while longer until her peaceful silence was unrepentantly interrupted as a hand touched her bare shoulder. She spun around suddenly and gasped when she realized the intruder was Angel.

"Oh...uh...hey," Joy hesitated, not knowing exactly what to say to the man of her thoughts. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to find you, Joy! I haven't seen you at all this weekend, and I just wanted to see how you've been." He joined her at the table. "How're you getting along with Buffy and her crew?"

"Fine, great actually!" Joy told him. "We spent the weekend getting to know each other." Joy explained. She cleared her throat and carefully asked Angel her next question. "So, I don't think you've ever actually told me, Angel, but how exactly do you know Buffy?"

Angel contemplated not answering truthfully, but he decided that he had known Joy for long enough to be honest with her. "Well, we used to date." He admitted.

"You dated?" Joy exclaimed, louder than she had meant to.

"Well, yea, it was a while ago." He shrugged. "Things didn't work out as well as we'd hoped. There were too many complications."

"Uh-huh," Joy replied softly. "So, when did you two meet?"

Angel thought for a minute before answering. "I think she was about fifteen."

Joy froze. That was the same year that Buffy had told her. He had to be the same person, or vampire. Joy didn't know what to do. She felt her throat turning dry as she realized that the man sitting across from her, the man who she had been spending so much time with lately, was a vampire! She slowly moved out of her chair and headed towards the exit.

"I've got to go now, Angel," She explained lamely as he stood to follow her.

"Well, why don't we try and get some quick slaying in tonight before you go home? You haven't done any training with me for a while!" Angel reminded the nervous girl.

"I'd love to, really I would, but..." Joy tried to think of an excuse.

"Come on Joy, why're you acting so strange?" Angel grabbed her arm to stop her as they exited the club.

"I'm not acting strange at all!" Joy defended herself. "I've just got to go and you're not letting me." She frowned. "Let go of me, Angel!" She demanded more harshly than she meant to. Angel didn't release her arm. With her free hand she punched him hard in the face and then shoved him off of her.

"Whoa, calm down Joy!" Angel immediately withdrew his hold from her. "I don't get what's bothering you, but I'm pretty sure that it's something to do with me." He frowned and stared at her pointedly, waiting for an explanation for her ferocity.

Joy felt tears burning her eyes. She knew what she would have to do if she wanted to know the truth once and for all. She pulled a long silver chain out from inside of her loose shirt where it always hung, almost down to her belly button. Grabbing hold of the cross pendant at the end of the chain, Joy pressed it hard against Angel's face. His face instantly contorted into a wrinkled and distorted face and his sharp fangs became evident. Tears streamed down Joy's face as she pulled the cross away from his face.

Taking a few steps backwards Joy tried to stop crying. "That's what's bothering me Angel!"

Angel tried to cover his vampire face with his hands but he knew it was useless. In less than a second he had lost her trust. He didn't know what to say. What could he say to make her understand? After this he doubted if she would ever want to be around him again. She doubted if she'd want to let him live. Joy had become quickly and firmly set in her slayer beliefs of all vampires being evil and therefore fated to be slayed. He let his face calm and return to its human state before trying to talk to Joy.

"Buffy told you didn't she?" Angel asked but Joy didn't respond. Her hands were clenched into fists and her eyes were shining fiercely with pained anger. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you myself Joy, I just didn't think you'd understand! If Buffy told you about me, she must have explained that I'm not dangerous!" He tried defending himself. "I swear Joy! I haven't fed on humans in years! I live on pigs' blood for god's sake!" He was becoming frantic and he was afraid that he was losing Joy's interest. "Joy, please believe me! I never meant to deceive you, I was just afraid that if you knew the truth about me that you'd never..."

Joy cut him off quickly, "Trust you? Good guess!" She started walking away from him but he quickly followed her.

"Joy please!" He touched her arm and she slapped at him hard in response. He quickly moved away from her but continued to beg her forgiveness. "Don't hate me for this!"

"Get away from me Vampire!" Joy glared menacingly and sprinted at full speed away from her old friend and trainer. Joy continued running the entire way to her car and then sped home. When she pulled into her driveway she grimaced as she noticed her aunt and uncle's car already there. She hadn't meant to be gone for so long but encountering Angel had distracted her. She anticipated her punishment bitterly as she parked her car and walked slowly up to the front door.

She didn't even have to knock on the door before her uncle opened it, letting it slam against the wall. She bit her lip as she entered the house, avoiding eye contact with her aunt and uncle who were waiting for her.

"I lost track of time..." Joy stated dumbly.

Dale grabbed Joy by both shoulders and threw her hard against the wall before she had a chance to say anything else. Her head smacked hard against the mirror hanging on the wall and it smashed instantly. That only made her uncle more upset and he let her know it as he pulled her up by her hair and shoved her down against the stairs. Joy shut her eyes tightly against the instant pain and tried to block out the rest of her uncle's punishment. She gritted her teeth and bared it but it wasn't over soon enough. Eventually though it ended, as it always did, with Uncle Dale heading into the kitchen to finish off another bottle of beer, Aunt Jo dropping on the sofa in front of the television, and Joy lying on the floor miserably, too sore and exhausted to move but wanting nothing more than to take a hot bath to soothe her sore muscles.

After laying still for almost a full five minutes, Joy slowly started to feel her senses returning and she managed to struggle to her feet, pulling herself up using the banister of the stairs. She whimpered softly as she stumbled up the stairs, trying to ignore the fierce pain that seemed to be encompassing each and every one of her limbs. At the top of the stairs she nearly tripped over the top step but she caught herself and eventually made her way into the bathroom at the end of the hall. Locking the door, Joy ran the bath water before carefully and slowly stripping off her club clothing and inspecting her body in the mirror. Her wrist hurt as she undressed and she assumed that she had twisted it. There were various darkening marks along her arms, legs, and stomach and she knew that in the morning they would be black bruises. There was a welt growing on her head from where she had hit the mirror. Her head stung with pain and when Joy reached up to feel the painful spot on her head she pulled her fingers away with blood. Her eye had already swollen shut after receiving multiple punches. She was sure that this was the worst punishment she had had, possibly ever, even that time that she crashed her dad's new Jaguar into the garage door and he had broken her ankle throwing her down the stairs. This was the worst pain that Joy had felt. She didn't think that she deserved such a giant punishment just for going out. She slowly eased her aching body into the bathtub and shut her eyes. The hot water stung her open cuts but also soothed her sore body.

Joy remained soaking in the bathtub for almost forty minutes before crawling out and wrapping her worn out body in a large towel before stumbling into her bedroom and clumsily dressing in her underwear and a loose tank top before collapsing onto her bed. She slept restlessly, tossing and turning the entire night trying to find a comfortable position that didn't cause her any pain.

"Joy, what happened to you?" Dawn practically screamed across the classroom when she entered the door and noticed her friend's black and swollen eye.

Joy had debated not attending school that day after she had woken up and realized how completely pathetic she looked, but she didn't want to try her uncle's patience by missing classes and so she forced herself to get out of bed and to drag her still aching body to school. Now as Dawn hurried over to her, with obvious worry on her face, Joy started doubting her choice to attend school that day.

"Joy, are you okay?" Dawn asked again as she sat in the desk behind her friend.

"Yea I'm fine," Joy lied as she tried to cradle her hurt wrist inconspicuously beneath the desk. "I just had a bad fight with the undead last night. You know how it is."

"Sure, but Joy you've been in some pretty bad fights before and I've never seen you this beat up! What happened last night?" Dawn wasn't as easily convinced as Joy had hoped she would be.

"There were a few, it's no big deal really. I'll heal soon enough." Joy shrugged. "Don't worry about me Dawn, it's worse then it looks!" She tried assuring her friend with a confident smile, but Dawn still seemed worried.

"Maybe you shouldn't go patrolling alone anymore. At least not for a while. I know Buffy said you were ready, but..."

"Dawn! I've been patrolling many times by myself, it's never been a problem for me before and it's not now! Things just got a little out of hand last night, okay? I promise there's nothing to worry about. Can you please let it drop?"

Dawn sighed. "Okay, fine, it's dropped." Dawn was quiet for a minute. "So, what're you telling everyone else who asks?"

Joy rolled her eyes. "I got in a fight. I don't like to lie."

Dawn didn't bring up the subject again. She could tell that her friend was in no mood to discuss the matter and she didn't want to upset her anymore so she stayed respectfully silent for the rest of the class. Although, her mind never stopped reeling with the possibility of Joy having lied to her. She hated to think that Joy would have, but she felt almost positive that something was wrong with Joy's story of a serious vampire fight. She knew that Joy was a good fighter, almost as good as Buffy. She would never let herself get so beat up. Would she?

After school Dawn begged for Joy to come home with her but Joy wasn't in the mood to receive any of Buffy's pestering questions. Then she would just have to lie all over again to try and persuade Buffy into believing her story. It was hard enough persuading Dawn, but Buffy was a Slayer. She would probably easily realize that Joy's bruises and cuts couldn't have come from one simple vampire fight. Joy was also in a hurry to return home just to make sure that her uncle could have nothing to blame her for again. So after apologizing to Dawn, Joy drove home and retired immediately to her room to begin her homework. Halfway through her History, her aunt interrupted her and sent her on a grocery run. Joy's body throbbed as she drove to the grocery store and shopped for her aunt's requested items. But, she didn't hurry. She shopped slowly, not very anxious to return to the house.

"Joy?" Her shopping was disturbed as a hand tapped her covered shoulder. Joy's entire body was mostly covered, strange for Joy's usual attire. She wore sweatpants and a long sleeve t-shirt to cover up all of her bruises. "Hey Joy, how're you doing?"

Joy turned around slowly and sighed when she realized the intruder was Buffy. "Oh, hey!"

"Dawn said that you'd gotten hurt last night in a fight," Buffy analyzed Joy's face wounds. "She wasn't kidding! God Joy, how'd you manage to get so banged up? I've never seen you look this bad!"

"I'm fine." Joy demanded.

"You don't look fine," Buffy leaned closer to Joy. "Where were you fighting last night?"

Joy hesitated, "Around the Bronze."

"You went to the Bronze last night, alone?" Buffy frowned.

"Yea, so?"

"Why?"

"I was feeling a little stressed. I needed to blow off some steam! It's no big deal Buff, okay?" Joy rolled her eyes and continued to shop.

"Joy, are you sure there's nothing wrong?" Buffy asked again. "You don't seem...well...I'm not sure exactly but you seem like something's wrong."

Joy sighed. "I'm fine Buffy! Can you please just leave me alone! I already told Dawn that I wasn't in the mood to come over tonight, so just back off, alright?" She turned her shopping cart in the opposite direction and headed away from Buffy.

"Joy, I thought we were friends now!" Buffy called after her. "What's going on with you?" But Joy didn't answer. She continued away from Buffy until she was out of sight.

By the time Joy left the grocery store the sun had already gone down. As she was loading the groceries into the trunk of her car she sensed someone behind her. Turning around she glared at Angel.

"What do you want Vampire?" Joy demanded through clenched teeth.

"What happened to you Joy?" Angel's hand reached to her face but she pulled away.

"It's none of your business anymore, Angel."

Angel sighed and let his hand drop to his side. "Please don't hold a grudge against me Joy."

"It's not a grudge Angel, I'm bigger than that! I've moved on to complete hate and disdain and never wanting to see you again!"

"Well at least you're not mad." Angel tried to smile. She didn't find it amusing. "Come on Joy, please don't hate me! I know I should have told you the truth earlier, but like I said before, I was afraid to lose your trust and well, your friendship..."

"Angel we're not friends okay. Since the day we met, you've done absolutely nothing but lie to me and that is not something that friends do!" Joy's voice was raising continually. "Look, I've already told you that I don't want anything else to do with you! I do not associate with vampires!"

"Well Buffy doesn't seem to have any problems with it!"

"She kicked you out of her life Angel, remember?"

"She didn't kick me out, I left her!" Angel retorted angrily. Joy was bring up an unpleasant subject for him and he was not in the mood to discuss it. "Besides, she knew I was a vampire for years before we broke up! She also knew that I was harmless and so she trusted me! Why can't you do the same?"

"There's no such thing as a harmless vampire Angel! You're all the same! You're all blood-thirsty demons and I don't want anything to do with you or your kind!" Joy was nearly screaming now.

"You'd be lost without me Joy!" Angel reminded her.

"If it wasn't for your kind I would never have been in this situation in the first place!" Without thinking she punched Angel hard in the face. He stumbled backwards in surprise.

"What the hell are you doing Joy?" He regained his composure quickly. She didn't answer. Instead she punched him again and shoved him hard. When he tried to duck her punches she swung her leg around hard and kicked him in the face. He didn't fight back though. He didn't want to. She was obviously angry about something more than just the fact that he was a vampire. He could tell that she was hiding something and that she had a lot of pent up anger to release and so he let her. Finally he reached for her arms to stop her and managed to take hold of them pinning them down to her sides. "What's going on Joy?"

She tried to wriggle her arms free but she was still in pain and so he was easily stronger than her. "Nothing's wrong Angel, I just don't like you and I wish you would leave me alone." She was wincing from the searing pain in her arm from Angel's strong grip.

He noticed her struggling but didn't release her arm. Instead he pushed up the sleeve of her arm instinctively. When he noticed the dark marks on her arm he shook his head. "Joy what happened?"

"I got in a fight with a few of your kind." Joy told him with a frown.

"Okay, I know you better than that Joy. This isn't the kind of bruising that you would get from a fight with a few vampires! What's going on?" Angel demanded.

"Like I said, it's none of your business anymore." Joy pulled her sleeve down. "I've got to go now. I'm already way later than I should be." She got in her car before Angel had a chance to say anything else. She drove away quickly, letting the tears roll down her eyes.

Angel however, immediately utilized his vampire speed and followed Joy on foot, leaping from building to building. When she pulled into her driveway, Angel hid behind a tree waiting for her to take the groceries inside and close the door before he snuck over to the window to spy on her better. What Angel hadn't realized though was that he and Joy hadn't been alone when they were having their debate in the grocery store parking lot. And he wasn't alone now. The onlooker had also chosen to follow Joy and Angel back to Joy's house and was now waiting in the bushes, at a good distance from Angel, not quite sure how to approach his sire.


	29. Chapter Twenty Nine

Chapter Twenty-Nine: Confessions

"Where've you been bitch?" Aunt Jo was waiting in the kitchen when Joy came in. "I sent you out for groceries over two hours ago! It shouldn't have taken you more than thirty minutes! What took you?"

Joy sighed and started unloading the grocery bags, slowly because her arms still ached when she reached for the higher cupboards. "I'm sorry Aunt Jo, I must've lost track of time. I didn't mean to take so long."

"Sorry? You're always so damn sorry!" Jo exclaimed.

"Well, I don't know what else to say! I am sorry, but you don't seem to care too much about that." Joy realized that she was being a little overly outspoken and no doubt she would upset her aunt, but after her confrontation with Angel, Joy was still uptight and not in the mood to be meek and apologetic.

"Don't sass me wench!" Jo stood quickly and shoved Joy hard against the counter. Joy banged her already bruised back against the counter edge and yelped in surprise pain.

"Aunt Jo, please not tonight!" Joy begged, pressing her hand over her ribs trying to control the pain she was experiencing.

"You're not in any position to ask favors from me!" Jo slapped her niece across the face. "I'm sick of your ignorance and your disobedience!" She took her niece's shoulders and threw her to the ground and then proceeded to kick her repeatedly in the stomach. Joy gritted her teeth and squeezed her eyes shut until her aunt's kicking ceased. She stayed still on the floor praying that the beating would be over but unfortunately for Joy, Jo had been drunk for an hour and her temper was only just beginning. "Get up!" Jo demanded.

Whimpering, Joy struggled to her feet and stood slightly trembling. She waited silently for her aunt to decide what to do to her next. Before her aunt had a chance to respond though, they were joined by Dale who had heard Jo's shouting and decided to come to her aid. Joy grimaced when she saw her uncle standing in the kitchen doorway. His fingers were slowly unbuckling the belt from his pants. She shook her head as tears gathered in her eyes. She started backing out of the kitchen into the adjoining dining room.

"Please Uncle Dale!" Joy begged hopelessly.

"Shut up!" Dale smacked her face to silence his niece. When he had his belt free from his waist he folded it over and gripped it tightly in his hand preparing to strike. Joy gasped as he slapped her hard with his leather belt. He ignored her exclamations of pain as he continued to administer fierce slaps with the belt. Joy didn't bother to beg for any more mercy but instead stayed perfectly silent as her uncle continued to beat her unmercifully.

Outside the dining room window, Angel remained crouched behind the bushes barely daring to lift his head, not wanting to be seen by anyone inside. When he finally brought his head up enough to see inside he unconsciously let out a low growl in response to what he saw. He watched in stunned silence for almost five minutes as Joy was thrown about the dining room, crashing into furniture and walls while she started bleeding from various newly created cuts. He frowned as Joy took the beatings without fighting back. He didn't understand why she was being so accepting of the abuse. Just when Angel decided he couldn't watch any longer and started to stand he became aware of someone standing beside him.

"Well, it's been a long time Peaches," Spike grunted, crouching beside his sire in the bushes.

Angel turned with wide eyes. "What're you doing here Spike?"

"I was watching you with Joy and I followed the two of you back here." He shrugged. "I wasn't expecting to see you tonight, Angel."

Angel sighed. "I know."

"How long have you been in Sunnydale?"

"For the same amount of time as Joy." Angel admitted.

"You're the one that trained her before she came to Buffy, huh?" Spike figured. "That's why she could fight so good before Buffy's training." He glanced sideways at his sire. "Why haven't you told anyone?"

Angel didn't answer for a minute. "I thought it'd be best for Joy."

Spike nodded. He seemed to understand and didn't press the matter any more. He turned his attention to the inside of the house where Joy was still being tossed about violently. "I don't get it. Why the bloody hell is she taking that from him? I've seen her fight vampires, she could stop him in a second!"

Angel agreed. "So why isn't she doing something?"

The vampires watched for a few minutes longer in bitter silence until finally Joy was thrown the hardest yet against the large window. It smashed into pieces and Joy flew outside above the vampires' heads. She landed a couple of feet away from the house against the trunk of a tree. Angel and Spike reacted immediately leaping to their feet and running to the young slayer's side.

"Joy," Angel knelt beside her and cupped her head with his hands. "Joy can you hear me?" Her eyes were closed and she wasn't moving. "Joy!" He called her name loudly and shook her gently.

Dale and Jo were standing at the broken window and they noticed the two men with their niece. Both started screaming at the men to leave her alone and ran to the front door and all the way to where the men were still kneeling by Joy.

"Get away from her!" Dale shouted at Angel, shoving Spike away.

Spike growled but restrained himself for a moment as Angel stood to face Joy's drunken uncle.

"Back away from me now and I'll spare you pain!" Angel demanded in a low, ferocious voice. Dale cackled defiantly.

Spike noticed Joy's eyelids fluttering and he knelt quickly. "Joy, are you okay?"

When she noticed Angel threatening her uncle Joy started trembling. "Please..." She gasped, coughing and sputtering for stronger breathing. "Leave him alone." She ordered to Angel.

"What?" Angel looked at her in shock. "Joy, you can't be serious!" He shook his head keeping his eyes on Dale. "He could've killed you! And I'm pretty sure this wasn't the first time this has happened!"

Joy shook her head slowly and pushed herself up on her elbows. "Angel, please..."

Dale grinned. "See, my little niece is loyal to her family, aren't ya?" He shook his head laughing horribly. "You pathetic little bitch!" He lunged towards her damaged form.

Angel grabbed his arm and threw him onto the ground. "Don't touch her!"

Spike jumped up to join the fight leaping on top of Dale and pounding his face repetitively.

Joy started to whimper as the guys beat harshly on her uncle. She couldn't explain her mixed emotions. She wanted revenge on him but at the same time she couldn't stand to see him harmed. He was family and as horrible as he was, she had lost enough family already. The guys ignored her tears though and continued their abuse until Jo ran screaming into the house and Dale stopped trying to fight back and simply laid on the ground in pain. The vampires returned to Joy's side and they both knelt down to her.

"Are you okay, Joy?" Angel asked with genuine concern.

She tried to talk but her lip had swollen to twice its regular size and her head was throbbing with pain.

"I don't know what to do for her." Angel told Spike. "We can't leave her here, with them!" He nodded towards her aunt and uncle.

"We should take her to Giles. He'll know what to do." Spike decided. "Or at least to Buffy. She can take care of her better than we can."

Angel nodded and scooped the young girl up into his arms. He felt a bulge in the back pocket of her jeans and pulled out her car keys. "We'll take her car." Angel decided. Spike agreed and took the keys from Angel to hurry ahead and open the back door. Angel set her down on the back seat and shut the door. "I'm driving." He climbed into the driver's seat and Spike got in the passenger's side. Angel sped the entire way to Buffy's house and had barely parked the car in the driveway before Spike had jumped out of the car and hurried around to unload Joy. Angel took her from Spike and carried her up to the front door. On the front steps Angel started getting nervous.

"Come on Angel, we've got to get her inside. She's going to need a doctor or something!" Spike ordered.

Angel hesitated. "I can't go in there Spike. I can't see Buffy!"

"This is no time for your damn pride Angel! Joy's in serious trouble and if you care about her half as much as you've let on just by taking care of her for the past few months, then I'm sure you don't want to let her go now. Isn't Joy more important than whatever's happened between you and Buffy?" Spike lectured.

Angel frowned. He hated it when Spike seemed wiser than himself. "You're right, let's go." Angel waited for Spike to knock. Nobody answered right away so Spike tried the door and found it unlocked. He quickly entered and waited for Angel to follow him.

"What's the matter?"

"I don't think I've been invited. I don't remember the last time I was here," Angel sighed.

"Oh come on, you've been in the house before!"

"But, not for a while. Buffy could've blocked me," Angel decided. He stepped forward and as he had predicted he was not able to enter.

Spike paused. "Hang on." He darted into the kitchen shouting out loud for someone to respond. He returned to the front door just as Dawn came skipping down the stairs.

"What's up Spike?" She stopped with a gasp when she saw Angel standing in the doorway. "Angel..." She stopped short when she noticed who Angel was holding in his arms. "What happened!"

"Hey niblit there'll be plenty of time for your questions later. But, could you invite him in first?" Spike asked.

Dawn seemed confused but then looked at Angel and nodded. "Right, of course, Angel come in!"

"Thanks Dawn," Angel hurried into the front room and deposited Joy on the long couch. "Where is everybody?" He asked quickly.

Dawn was preoccupied with her best friend's well being and she didn't respond.

"Dawn, where's your sister?" Spike repeated Angel's question.

"Oh, she's out patrolling with Riley."

Angel straightened up. "Are they coming back here?"

Dawn nodded, "I'm sure they will eventually."

"Where's everyone else?" Spike asked quickly, trying to get Angel's mind off of his biggest rival.

"Willow's upstairs in her room and Tara's taking a shower." Dawn informed.

Angel glanced towards the door. "Maybe I should go. You guys can take care of this without me." He started to leave but Dawn quickly hurried after him.

"Angel, don't leave! I don't understand why you're here or how you know Joy, but you have to stay. I know Buffy will want to see you, and besides we can't take care of this alone! You have to stay and help us!" She insisted as she took Angel's hand and pulled him back over to the couch. "Spike, make him stay."

Spike shrugged. "I don't know how, but I do think it'd be better if you stayed Angel."

Angel sighed and looked at Joy who seemed to have fallen asleep. If he wanted to regain her trust he had to show her how much he cared about her. He couldn't just leave her here. "Fine, I'll stay, but if Buffy's angry at me..."

"Don't worry, I'll talk to her!" Dawn promised. "Let's try and get Joy comfortable."

The guys agreed with Dawn and started gathering throw pillows from around the living room. They propped up her head and her legs. Dawn ran upstairs to retrieve the witches and a moment later returned to the living room with Willow and Tara at her heels.

"What happened?" Tara exclaimed.

"Angel?" Willow gasped. "What're you doing here?"

"Uh," Angel hesitated.

"I'm sure it's a long story, Willow, and right now Joy's more important." Dawn reminded the redhead.

Willow nodded and quickly took charge. "Alright, tell us what happened." She demanded the vampires as she knelt beside the couch to inspect Joy's wounds.

Spike and Angel exchanged uncertain glances. Finally Angel answered. "Her family abuses her."

"What?" All three girls responded together.

"You're joking right?" Dawn's eyes watered instinctively. "She said that it was a fight. She said there were too many vampires for her to handle..." She shook her head and tried to stop crying. "I could tell that something was wrong but...I should have known!"

"Dawn, it's not your fault!" Willow tried to comfort the young girl. "You can't blame yourself for Joy's problems. If she had wanted you to know she would have told you!" Tara nodded in agreement.

Dawn sniffed. "I know. She wouldn't tell me. She didn't want anyone to know. She's always trying to be so brave. I just wish that she would have told someone. We could have helped...maybe." She shrugged. "I don't know how, but I'm sure Buffy could have come up with some solution!"

"Well, we know now, so we'll just have to make sure that it doesn't happen again!" Willow decided.

Joy started to stir but just as she opened her eyes the front door swung open and Buffy and Riley bounded into the front room. Everyone stood still and silent waiting to see Buffy's reaction to her past vampire lover.

"What's going on in here? You all look like you've seen a ghost or something!" Buffy grinned as she surveyed the solemn faces in the room. When she noticed Angel her smile faded. "Angel..."

"I shouldn't have kept it a secret for so long." He apologized quickly.

"What?"

"My being here, in Sunnydale, training Joy." He acknowledged the young slayer who lay motionless on the couch watching the others with expressionless eyes.

"You've been training Joy?" Buffy gasped. "I should have realized. She was too good of a fighter not to have been trained by someone!" She shook her head. "Why didn't you tell me Angel?"

"I didn't plan on ever telling you actually. I didn't want to interfere with your life."

"Interfere?" Buffy frowned. She noticed Riley standing at her side and hung her head in realization. "Oh, right..."

No one spoke for a minute. Everyone was uncomfortable in the room and no one quite knew what to say or to do to make things less awkward. Joy's moaning quickly brought everyone's attention back to the more pressing matter at hand.

"Joy, how're you feeling?" Buffy pulled a chair over to the couch to sit by the younger slayer.

Joy was feeling a little groggy and didn't exactly comprehend what was going on. "Buffy..." She coughed and tried to sit up but Buffy shook her head motioning for Joy to stay still. "I'm fine." Joy insisted with a forced frown.

"No you're not! You look like hell!" Spike rolled his eyes. "Listen to the Slayer, Joy, she knows what she's doing."

Joy sighed and dropped her head back on the pillows.

"Dawn, go get Joy some water." Buffy ordered. "Willow, bring me some bandages." She rolled up Joy's sleeve to see how much of her body was covered with injuries. Her eyes widened as she realized that most all of Joy's body seemed to have been damaged and Joy let her know how much it hurt with her constant yelps and whimpers. "Joy, how long has this been going on?" Buffy inquired with obvious worry.

Joy felt tears burning her eyes again. She hated all these people seeing this side of her. This was her weak side, the side that she kept hidden from the world.

"Joy, you can't handle this situation on your own!" Buffy commented softly. "Talk to us..." She noticed Joy's swollen lip and quickly added, "If you can."

Joy cleared her throat and forced herself to speak. "I can handle this." She tried to assure everyone. "It's my problem." She coughed again and tried to pull her sleeve down over her bruised arm. She didn't want them to see all of her wounds. They wouldn't be able to understand. They all knew that she could have prevented the pain that she endured, but they wouldn't understand why she didn't. "Please..."

"In the past Joy, your life may have been just your problem, but now you're a part of our group and so now your problems are ours as well." Buffy told Joy with a genuine smile. "You don't really have a choice, Joy. You're stuck with us!" She turned to Riley. "Will you get me some ice please? Maybe we can reduce some of this swelling." Riley quickly headed to the kitchen.

Dawn and Willow returned a moment later with their items. Buffy held the glass of water to Joy's lips and Spike quickly came around to support Joy's head so that she could drink. When she was finished Joy pulled her head away from the glass.

Buffy sighed and glanced around the room at her friends. "Dawn can you stay here with Joy for a minute. I want to talk to everyone in the other room." Buffy led the way into the dining room and closed the dividing door to make sure that Joy wouldn't be able to hear their conversation. "Alright, I know that Joy likes to pretend she's tough, but we all know that this is beyond her control. She's been beat so bad that if she wasn't a slayer she probably wouldn't be able to recover! Now, I don't know why she let it go this far, I mean she could easily have defended herself, but like I said this is obviously beyond her control!" Buffy took a seat at the table and made brief eye contact with everyone. When she looked at Angel he quickly looked away, feeling a little awkward being a part of one of Buffy's talks again. "Angel, there's a lot that I need to talk to you about but right now Joy's my first concern." Angel nodded understandingly. "I think we should call Giles." Buffy suggested. "He's the only person that I know of that is mature enough to know how to deal with Joy's issues."

The others all nodded their consent. Willow immediately left to phone the watcher and explained everything that they knew. He promised to come over right away. With that settled, they returned to the living room to wait Giles's arrival and try and keep Joy as calm and comfortable as possible.

"How is she doing?" Angel asked Dawn.

"Actually she seems a little better. She's talking more, and she's actually moving a little now." Dawn informed the group. Joy nodded to prove Dawn's point.

"That's good," Buffy leaned against the wall. "Do you want anything Joy?"

Joy shook her head. "I'm fine, I promise." She grunted as she tried to readjust her position. "I'm just a little sore." The others grinned at her inability to lose her pride or bravery. "I'd actually like to stand up."

Buffy shook her head. "I'm not sure that's a good idea yet Joy."

Joy sighed, "I'm not crippled Buffy! I'm a slayer and I'm strong enough to stand up!" She insisted, beginning to move her legs over the side of the couch. Spike was at her side in an instant, offering her an arm to keep her steady as she stood. Angel came to her other side and offered her a hand but Joy refused it with a glare. "Just because you acted all 'knight-in-shining-armor' tonight, that doesn't make things better between us." Joy reminded him. "I still don't like you." She glared and leaned more on Spike as he helped her walk away from the couch. "Thank you Spike." Joy offered Spike a weak smile.

Angel fumed as he realized that Joy was obviously oblivious to the fact that Spike was also a vampire. He moved to the other side of the room.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Spike asked considerately.

Joy nodded, "Thanks for your concern Spike, it means a lot." Angel rolled his eyes. A moment later the front door swung open again and Giles hurried into the living room.

"Good lord!" Giles exclaimed when he saw Joy's disastrous state. "Joy are you alright?"

"Yes, I'm fine!" She sighed in frustration at how many times she had to answer the same annoying question. "Look, I appreciate everyone's concern and everything, but seriously I'm fine. I just need to go home and get some rest. Okay?"

"No way!" Dawn exclaimed. "You can't go home! You're uncle's just going to beat you up again!"

Joy frowned. "You don't understand. He's not a bad person, it's just that sometimes he has too much to drink and I make him angry if I do something wrong and...he's just trying to teach me to obey him better. I mean, Uncle Dale and Aunt Jo sacrificed a lot to take me in when my parents died. I'm grateful that..."

Spike cut her off. "You know you don't believe all that shit, Gidget!"

Angel agreed. "You're smarter than that Joy."

Giles seemed to notice the vampire for the first time. "Angel?"

"Oh, right, hey Giles, I'm back. I've been training Joy from the beginning, I'm sorry I didn't tell you guys sooner, and so on. I'll explain it all later once we've taken care of her." He explained in a rush.

Giles seemed to accept that explanation and returned his attention to Joy. "Joy, you can not return to your family if your uncle is going to abuse you!"

Joy sighed. "I know, but I don't really have a choice."

"Yes you do Joy! You're a bloody slayer! Why've you let this go on for so long?" Spike demanded.

Joy shook her head. She dropped back on the couch as her legs started to tremble from her weak state. "You wouldn't understand. None of you would!" She tried to explain but she didn't know what to say to make them accept her reasons. "Dale and Jo are the only family I have. If I was to leave them, I'd...I'd be alone!" She started to shiver from a mix of cold, pain, and nervousness. Willow brought her a blanket and draped it over Joy's shoulders. "I can't fight them. They wouldn't let me stay with them."

"You can't stay with them Joy!" Dawn insisted. "If you won't fight them and you won't leave them, they'll end up killing you! They almost did tonight!"

Angel agreed. "If Spike and I hadn't of shown up..."

Joy silenced him with a fierce glare. "Look, like I said, I appreciate the concern, but it's really not your problem." She stood again and started walking towards the door. "I've been in worse situations than this, trust me." Everyone looked at her curiously but nobody spoke. Spike came to her side again and she let him place his arm around her waist. "I'm okay, Spike..."

Again the door swung open and this time Xander and Anya barged in. When they saw Joy they instantly started fawning.

"Are you okay, Joy? Giles called us and told us what had happened! I can't believe that you were letting your uncle hurt you so badly." Anya exclaimed.

Joy rolled her eyes but didn't answer Anya. Instead she dropped her head on Spike's shoulder and looked up at him. "I want to leave. Could you just help me out to my car?"

"Don't be an idiot Joy!" Buffy followed her to the door. "You can't go!"

"Whoa!" Xander exclaimed suddenly. "Sire and childe together again, hey Spike?"

Joy paused at the doorway and turned to Xander who had just noticed Angel in the living room. "What does that mean Spike?"

Spike shook his head but Xander explained. "Oh, do you know Angel, Joy? Well, you know it's kind of strange seeing him back here with Spike, Angel being Spike's sire and all..."

Buffy motioned to Xander to be quiet. Joy gasped and looked at Spike pitifully. "It's not true!" She spoke in almost a whisper. "Not you too!" Spike hung his head, unable to deny Xander's accusation. "No!" Joy pushed Spike away from herself and stumbled back into the living room. "What kind of people are you? I thought I had signed on to learn how to kill vampires, not to befriend them," She glared at Buffy, "and bed them!" Buffy frowned. "How could you possibly associate with their kind!"

"Joy, I thought I made it clear when I told you about Angel. I told you that he had a soul, he's good now!" Buffy reminded Joy.

"Oh, so are you trying to tell me that that thing has a soul too?" She nodded towards Spike who was standing in shock by the door.

Buffy shook her head, "No, Spike doesn't have a soul, but he's not dangerous! Please trust me!"

"How could I?" Joy was nearly screaming but her voice was hoarse and it was obvious that she was in pain because she had almost doubled over and her arm was wrapped tightly around her stomach. "You've all lied to me! You brought me here promising to help me destroy the evil demons in this world and now I find out that you're friends with them!" She backed away towards the door. "Well, I won't be friends with those things! There's no such thing as a 'good' vampire. They're all demons and they all should die! Maybe you should too!" Joy growled at Buffy through gritted teeth. "You're just like her!" she whispered fiercely, mostly to herself, but the others heard her.

"Just like who Joy?" Giles questioned her.

_Damn, he doesn't miss anything, does he? _Joy shook her head. She felt her energy draining and her head started throbbing. She knew she couldn't drive home in this condition and she also knew that she couldn't go home to her aunt and uncle anyway. Buffy was at least right about that. "It's not important." She lied trying to blink away the tears that had formed in her eyes.

"Joy, what are you keeping from us?" Giles asked sincerely. "There is no reason for you to dislike Angel and Spike when you have obviously been friends with them for the past few months."

Joy's lip quivered and she started to whimper as she relented to the group staring at her and waiting for her to answer. She slowly sat down on the couch, leaning back to rest her aching body before finally confessing the truth to her past. "My parents didn't die accidentally." She started.

"How did they die, Joy?" Buffy asked, sitting next to Joy on the couch.

"They were murdered." Joy announced. "They were brutally murdered by creatures like you." She glared pointedly at Spike and Angel.

"Vampires killed your parents?" Dawn asked.

Giles didn't seem too surprised by Joy's statement. "And you killed these vampires did you not?"

Joy nodded. "And the person that sent them."

"The person?" Buffy questioned. "You make that sound like it was a human."

"She was."

"She is the person you meant a minute ago, Joy, correct?" Giles asked.

Joy nodded. "She associated with vampires, just like you guys do."

"We don't assign vampires to murder, Joy!" Buffy exclaimed. "Angel and Spike are the only vampires that I have ever been on speaking terms with!" She promised. "They aren't murderers anymore Joy, they're on our side, you have to understand that!"

"I don't believe that vampires can be good, Buffy. You're going to have to accept that."

"And you're going to have to accept that they can be." Buffy retorted.

"Girls, enough," Giles cut off their debate. "Can we return to when you said that you killed a human?"

Joy sighed. "I didn't want to. I didn't actually realize that she was a human until we started fighting. If I hadn't have killed her she would have killed me." Joy shook her head. "She deserved it anyway. She sent those vampires to kill my parents!" Joy's tears had dried and had been replaced with anger.

"Why would anyone want to have your parents killed?" Dawn asked.

"I wondered the same thing." Joy sighed. "After I killed her I did some research and found out that she was one of my dad's cases. My dad was a judge. He didn't give her the verdict that she wanted so she had him and my mother killed." Joy explained. She realized that everyone was staring at her accusingly. "I know I shouldn't have murdered a human okay, but she did deserve it. I even tried to find her family to explain what had happened but I couldn't find anyone. I don't think she had a family though."

Buffy was still in shock. "You killed a human, Joy! Doesn't that mean something to you?"

"She was no more of a person than any of the vampire's I've killed. She sent them to _murder _two innocent people. She deserved death!" Joy insisted.

"Who are you to make that decision Joy? How can you decide who deserves to live and die?" Buffy asked.

"Murderers like her and her demonic friends deserve death! Vampires, demons, they deserve death and I've killed my share of them!" Joy had started crying again. "I don't give mercy to vampires just because I want to Buffy! God knows I wish I could, then maybe I could have saved Henri!" She drew in a sudden breath after her last statement. She hadn't meant to tell them that much.

"Joy, I thought that Henri died." Dawn replied softly.

Joy sighed, "He did. He was killed by vampires." She confessed. Everyone was silent. They hadn't anticipated so much bad history in the new slayer's life. They didn't know how to respond.

"Joy, I'm sorry..." Dawn whispered.

"Actually, he wasn't killed by vampires, he was changed by vampires. They made him one of them. They made my boyfriend a vampire and then I killed him." She shrugged. "I had no other choice. After I found out what had happened to him...he had to be destroyed." She realized that everyone was staring at her and she began to get frustrated. "Don't tell me you wouldn't have done the same thing...oh wait a minute, that's right you don't kill vampires that you're sleeping with." She glared at Buffy who gasped in response.

"Joy, that's not fair..." Buffy started.

"Well, it's true!" Joy defended her statement.

"Joy that is not exactly relevant at the moment..." Giles tried to soothe the girls before they broke out in another argument.

"Like I said you're no different than her, the girl that killed my parents!" Joy accused angrily.

"Joy you murdered a human being!" Buffy exclaimed, equally angry. "Don't you feel a little guilty about that?"

"Faith wasn't a human, she was just as much demon as the vampires she associated with," Joy glanced around the room and realized that everyone's faces had turned suddenly blank. "What now?"

"Did you say Faith?" Giles asked slowly.

Joy nodded, "Yea, that's the girl that killed my parents."

Giles looked at Buffy and she shook her head. "It couldn't have been her, Giles. She would've killed Joy in an instant!"

Joy became defensive and irritated. "I'm not that easy to kill, but thanks for the vote of encouragement!" Joy struggled to her feet, very aware of her still feeble condition. "I can't stay here any longer. I should've known you were al the same! I never should have trusted you, any of you!" She glared at Angel pointedly. "I can't trust anybody but myself..." She stumbled to the door and this time no one followed her. Joy's ankle was throbbing and she was certain that it was twisted, possibly broken. She slammed the door behind her exit and wobbled down the front steps to her car. She realized that she didn't have the keys to her car and sighed with frustration. _Why did I trust them? Why did I tell them everything! I knew they wouldn't understand, nobody understands me! _She started to cry again and almost fell against the car as she started to tremble from the pain. She had to get away from that house. She couldn't stand to be around those people. She didn't really hate them like she said, she was more just embarrassed that they knew so much about her. She had tried so hard to hide her tragedies from everyone and now they knew everything. She felt certain that they would pity her. Joy hated pity. Joy moved away from the car and started limping down the sidewalk away from the house, trying to distance herself from the scoobies. Less than a block away from the house, Joy lost her balance and collapsed on the sidewalk. She didn't have the strength to stand again and so she stayed crumbled in pain on the ground, crying and wishing she had never come to Sunnydale.

"I don't understand why she never told me any of this before!" Dawn stood by the large window in the living room, staring out into the darkness and trying to see where her friend went. "I thought she told me everything." Dawn's eyes started tearing. "I thought we were best friends."

"Dawnie, I'm sure Joy is your best friend," Willow tried to comfort the teenager. "There's just a lot of pain in Joy's past."

"Willow's right Dawn," Buffy told her sister. "Joy still needs a best friend. She just needs some time to calm down."

"Joy can't go back to her house, Buffy," Dawn insisted. "Her uncle will hurt her again, he could kill her!"

"The niblit's got a point, Buffy," Spike consented. "We shouldn't leave the girl to get herself beat up again." He straightened up as though he were preparing to go and fetch the runaway slayer.

"I don't know what to do!" Buffy whined. "We can't exactly force her to come back to us if she doesn't trust us." She looked at her watcher. "What do you suggest Giles?"

"Buffy, I am also uncertain how to go forward with Joy's training if she refuses to come back here. However, you must understand that we need her, just as much as she needs us." Giles sighed. He seemed defeated. "All we can do is wait and hope that she returns." He removed his glasses and dropped onto the couch.

Willow and Tara sat down together on the other couch. Both witches seemed to share Giles's hopeless feelings. Xander and Anya stayed silent by the doorway, waiting and watching uncertainly as Buffy began to pace the room. Dawn stayed glued to her watch at the window, biting her lip and waiting hopefully. Spike still seemed considering going after Joy but he didn't make any movement towards the front door. Finally Buffy stopped pacing and fixed her hands on her hips impatiently.

"I feel useless just waiting here. She's in no condition to be out there on her own right now! Any demon that wanted to fight her right now could kill her without trying! She's too weak to be alone!" Buffy decided. "I have to go after her!" She pushed past Spike at the doorway and reached to open the front door.

Angel rushed over to stop her. "Buffy, if anyone's going after her, it's going to be me."

"No offense Angel, but Joy didn't exactly seem to want to be around you at the moment. I don't think you're the best candidate to be going after her." Buffy commented.

Angel shrugged, "True, but this whole thing is sort of my fault. If I hadn't lied to her for so long about being a vampire, she never would have gotten so angry."

Buffy shook her head. "If you go after her Angel, she might just run farther. Okay?"

"I've got to try Buffy," Angel told her. He opened the door and hurried outside before the slayer could try to stop him again.

"He shouldn't go..." Buffy sighed. She debated going after him.

Riley put out his hand to stop her. "Let him go, Buffy. Maybe he's right. Maybe this is something that he has to do."

"I just hope that he is not too late." Giles spoke up. Dawn pressed her face against the window, following Angel with her eyes until he was no more than a night shadow.


	30. Chapter Thirty

Chapter Thirty: Healing

It didn't take Angel long to find Joy since she was still lying on the sidewalk, too sore to move and too exhausted to try. When she saw Angel coming towards her she started struggling to stand, but it was a useless attempt. He knelt by her side and lifted her head into his lap.

"Joy, please just listen to me." Angel whispered. She whimpered and tried to move away from him but he held her still and she finally stopped struggling. "No matter how much you hate me right now, I know that deep down you really do trust me. I know that you can feel my soul, Joy. You know I'm not evil. I also know that you don't hate Buffy and her group. You know that all they want is to help you, Joy." She was crying softly. "I know you're scared and you feel weak, but Buffy and Giles, they need you Joy."

She looked up at him. "They need me?" She sniffled. "Why would they need me?"

"Because you're the slayer Joy, you and Buffy, you're all this world's got to fight off the real evil creatures." He ran a hand through her hair and felt the welt on her head. "Joy, you're in no condition to be on your own now and you know it. You need their help. Please let me take you back to them." He picked her up into his arms and stood. "You know that you're not strong enough to be alone."

Joy sighed and let her aching head drop onto his shoulder. "I'm still not sure I can trust you, Angel."

He nodded. "I know. I promise you, after I take you back to Buffy I will leave and you'll never have to see me again." He started walking back down the sidewalk toward the Summers' house. "I promise they'll help you, Joy."

"Okay," Joy finally gave in to his pleas. "Take me back."

Angel sighed with relief and almost ran back to Buffy's house, carefully carrying Joy the entire way. When he reached the door he struggled to keep her balanced and opened the door with one hand. As soon as he had the door opened he started calling for assistance.

"Did she come back voluntarily?" Buffy asked with concern as Angel brought Joy back to her place on the couch. Everyone gathered around cautiously, still wondering whether or not Joy would become angry and flee again.

"Yes, she wanted to come back." Angel informed the worried group. "I think you'll find her easier to talk to now." He looked at Joy hesitantly before heading back towards the door.

"Angel," Buffy stopped him. "Where're you going?"

He avoided eye contact with Joy but he could feel her eyes on him. "I'm not staying." He explained simply.

Buffy glanced at Joy and nodded. "I'd like to talk to you sometime Angel. I think you could help us with her."

Angel shrugged. "We'll see. But, I can't stay." He lowered his voice so only Buffy could hear. "It was the only way I could get her to come back. I can't stay Buffy."

"It's okay, I understand." She looked back at Joy again. "But seriously Angel, I'd like to talk to you. So come back sometime okay?"

He paused. "We'll see Buffy. But, I'm not going to make any promises." He quickly made his exit.

Buffy returned to the young slayer's side. "Joy, are you feeling any better?"

Joy nodded and tried to sit up. Dawn was instantly at her side to help. "I don't know what to say..." She sighed and bit her lip. "I didn't mean to say all that..." She wasn't crying this time at least. She didn't think she could cry anymore. Her eyes were burning from all the previous tears and the swelling on her eye hadn't lessened any and it hurt her to cry.

"You did though Joy," Buffy decided. "We don't blame you though Joy," She handed Joy a glass of water. "I never knew what you'd gone through Joy. I wish you would have told us sooner. I didn't realize that you didn't trust us."

"I do trust you Buff," Joy insisted. "I'm sorry that I said all that stuff before..." She didn't know what she was saying exactly. She felt bad about the way she had acted earlier, but at the same time she was only speaking her true mind for possibly the first time with the Scoobies.

"Joy don't apologize." Buffy stopped her. "I had no idea what had really happened with your family. It's all terrible really! I wouldn't expect you to trust vampires!" She glanced hesitantly at Spike. "Maybe you should leave, Spike." He nodded and politely headed towards the door. Nobody tried to stop him and in a minute he was gone. "Joy, I am so sorry about everything you've gone through, I wish..."

"Don't pity me Buffy! I hate pity!" Joy interrupted. "You can help me if you want but please do not feel sorry for me!" She sat up straighter and started untying the laces on her shoes. When she felt her ankle she frowned, decided that it was definitely swollen. "All the problems in my life are _my _problems, okay?"

"Okay," Buffy frowned. "I know I can't do anything about what's happened in your past, even though I am sorry about it, I can't help that, but Joy you can't stop me from wanting to help you now." She noticed Joy's swollen ankle and gave instructions for Anya to bring her ice to try and control the swelling.

Joy started to speak but then stopped and seemed to change her mind. "I don't know what to do."

Willow smiled. "Admitting it is the first step, sweetie."

Joy nodded. She didn't know what else to say. She had given up trying to avoid help and it was obvious that these people were determined to help her. She decided that she had lost her stubborn struggle for solitary independence and surprisingly, she was discovering that she didn't mind half as much as she had assumed she would. It had been a while since she had people in her life who really seemed to care about her like the Scoobies did.

"How'd you sleep Joy?" Willow was waiting in the kitchen with French toast by time Joy woke up the next morning. "I heard it was your favorite." She explained when Joy's eyes widened at the delicious smelling breakfast.

"Thanks Willow," Joy smiled. "That's really sweet of you." Joy moved slowly, trying to ignore her various pains as she eased into a stool chair at the counter. "I slept okay. I just hope that Riley wasn't too uncomfortable on the couch." She leaned back in her chair to try and see into the living room.

"Don't worry, I'm sure he slept fine." Willow told her. "He got up over an hour ago and went for a jog." She handed Joy a plate with French toast. "He'll probably be back soon."

"Where's everyone else?" Joy asked.

"Tara had a morning class and actually, I think Buffy and Dawn are still asleep." Willow smiled. "Well, we did have a pretty late night last night." She shrugged. "I doubt Dawn will go to school today. She'll probably want to stay home with you."

Joy reached for the maple syrup and drenched her French toast in the sticky liquid. "I can't miss school." She sighed. "Uncle Dale goes crazy if I miss school."

Willow poured Joy a glass of orange juice. "Sweetie, I know it'll probably be hard for you to accept, but I don't think you're going to be going back to your aunt and uncle's. You really can't Joy. They're not safe for you."

"I know they're not the best people, but Willow, if I don't go back to them I have no one!" Joy despairingly swirled the syrup around on her plate with her fork. "They're the only family I have left. Besides, in their will, my parents left me with Dale and Jo. I don't really have a choice!"

"Well, I don't think your parents expected for you to get abused with your aunt and uncle!" Willow argued.

Joy shrugged. "Trust me, they wouldn't have cared." Joy grew strangely quiet for a moment.

"Joy..." Willow turned to the young girl. "Did your parents..." She paused. "Did they beat you too?"

Joy slowly nodded. "Sometimes."

"Joy, I'm so sorry." Willow's eyes looked teary.

"Come on Willow, don't do the pity game, okay?" Joy shook her head. "My parents and I didn't have the best relationship but that's in the past, right?" She stuffed her mouth full of French toast. "Right now, all I have to think about is my current 'parental' relationships." She shrugged. "And there's not much I can do about that, is there?"

Before Willow could answer the hopeless child they were joined in the kitchen by Buffy and Dawn. They took seats on either side of Joy and took the full plates that Willow handed them.

"Is Giles here yet?" Buffy asked immediately. "He said that he would come over in the morning. Xander and Anya both have work today or else they probably would have come over too."

"No he's not here yet, but I'm sure he's on his way."

"Is Riley jogging?" Buffy asked knowingly. Riley never missed any part of his manly morning routine. Willow nodded. "Figures. Anyway, until Giles gets here, I'm not really sure what we're going to do with you." Joy was silent. "But don't worry Joy, we're going to take care of you, whether you want us to or not." Buffy assured her with a grin. "You're sort of stuck with us now."

"Okay, I'll let you help, but seriously Buffy, don't go out of your way for me or anything! I really don't want to put you out!" Joy started to worry.

"Joy, calm down. I won't do anything that I don't want to do." She smiled. "I promise."

Joy shrugged. "I guess that's fair enough."

"Now, today I want you just to relax, okay?" Buffy instructed. "Because if you don't relax you'll never heal and if you don't heal then I'll be patrolling alone and that's no fun!" She grinned. Noticing that Joy had finished eating her breakfast Buffy motioned for the younger girl to follow her into the living room. "Come on, sit here and put your feet up." Buffy helped Joy get situated on the couch and dragged over a cushioned bench for Joy's feet. "Do you want to watch TV?" She brought the remote control to Joy. "Or do you want a magazine or a book to read?"

Joy smiled. "Buff, seriously, you don't have to take care of me. I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself."

"Okay, first of all, you've got to get over this pride or whatever it is because you're hurt and I am going to take care of you." Buffy demanded.

"Fine, I can see that I'm not going to be winning any debates with you right now, so I guess I'll have to shut up." Joy sighed. "But don't get use to bossing me around!" She silenced and settled back into the couch and switched on the television. A moment later she was joined by Dawn, who brought Joy another plate of French toast.

"Willow said you didn't eat enough." Dawn grinned and handed Joy the food.

"She's going to make me fat, isn't she?" Joy laughed and happily accepted the second plate of breakfast.

"She'll definitely try her hardest," Dawn agreed. "So, what're we going to do while sloughing school?"

"Sloughing?" Joy pretended to be offended. "Dawn, dearest, you know I'd never ever consent to skipping school!" She cocked her eyebrow teasingly.

"Of course you wouldn't! You are a very dedicated student!" Dawn joined her friend's joking.

"But, since we have been given strict orders not to go to school today..." Joy grinned. "I saw we take advantage of our day off!"

Dawn reached for the TV guide. "Hmm..." She flipped through the pages of schedules carelessly. "There's not much on..." She stopped and then smiled. "There's a _Bewitched _marathon on all day..."

Joy grinned and grabbed the guide from Dawn to verify the schedule. "It's perfect!" She flipped to the right channel and they started their lazy day right away.

A short time later they were interrupted by Giles who had just arrived and was eager to discuss the matter of Joy's aunt and uncle. He first came into the living room to greet Joy and then disappeared into the dining room with Buffy. They closed the door. Dawn didn't seem to think anything of it, but Joy was a little worried that they did not ask her to join their discussion, since they were undoubtedly discussing her. She sat for a few minutes, uncomfortably shifting her position, but eventually she forced herself to stand and make her way silently to the door to the dining room. She glanced at Dawn who was watching her curiously and held her finger to her lips to signal her silence. When she put her ear to the dining room door Joy could hear the conversation going on inside.

"There is no possible way I am going to allow that young girl to return to those fearsome people." Giles was saying.

"But, how are we supposed to keep her away from them Giles, they are her legal guardians." Buffy reminded him. "We can't just keep her here forever and not tell them where she is. They'll have the police after us!"

"She can not return to them. I have just come from visiting Spike. Last night after he left the house he went straight to Joy's home to try and speak to her 'guardians'. He claims they were so horribly drunk that they could not even speak properly without yelling or cursing, also they invited him in without realizing it. There were broken items all around the house and Spike believes that they were broken during Joy's abuse." Giles informed. "That is not exactly a safe environment for a young girl to live in."

"I agree but still..." Buffy was at a loss on how to solve Joy's predicament.

"Spike agrees with us also and he insists on being allowed to meet with Joy's relatives to debate her situation. He believes that he could be persuasively successful." Giles explained.

__

Why would Spike care about my well-being? Joy wondered to herself as she continued to listen at the door. _He's a vampire! Vampire's don't have feelings. _She remembered how Buffy had told her about Angel's ability to feel. _But still...they're vampires and vampires are evil. Pure evil. Aren't they? _She listened longer.

"Have you been able to track down Angel?" Buffy asked.

Giles paused for a minute before answering. "Spike told me that Angel was also at the house. He had arrived before Spike." He paused again.

"What happened Giles?" Buffy asked.

"It seems that when Angel arrived he had been furious..." Giles began. "And when Spike arrived...well, it seems that Angel had already administered a rather unfortunate amount of violence upon both of Joy's relatives."

Buffy gasped. "Were they hurt seriously?"

"No of course not. You know Angel would never allow himself to seriously injure anyone, not even someone as terrible as those people are. But they were hurt badly enough for them to be sufficiently frightened."

__

I can't believe Angel would do something like that for me! Joy felt cared for again. _But even so he's a vampire and there's no way that I can ever trust him again. He lied to me for too long. Plus, he's a vampire!_ Joy was not going to be able to easily let that fact go.

"Both Spike and Angel are determined not to let Joy return to that household." Giles told Buffy. "And I am in complete agreement with them."

"Well, I'm not so sure we're going to be able to keep her from her aunt and uncle." Buffy sighed. "As much as I'd like to, but we have no right!"

"Spike told me that they seem to be the sort of people that could be easily bribed." Giles commented.

"You want to pay them for their niece?" Buffy questioned in shock.

"If they would accept it." Giles stated. "If they would be willing to accept bribery money to release the custody of their niece, then yes I would pay them anything!" He cleared his throat and paused again. "She is worth more than a bribe. If those people can not realize that, and Spike seems to believe they can not, then they do not deserve someone as priceless as Joy."

__

Priceless? Joy gasped and stepped back from the door momentarily in shock. She covered her mouth with her hand and her eyes started to water. _He thinks I'm priceless? Would they really be willing to pay my aunt and uncle just to be able to keep me away from them? _She smiled at the thought. _I guess they really do care about me. _She realized how emotional she was becoming and quickly wiped the tears away from her eyes and returned to her solemn listening at the door.

"We should talk to her before anything is decided." Giles concluded. His voice seemed to be coming nearer to the door and Joy quickly started backing away. Before she was farther then a foot from the door though, her injured ankle faltered and she tripped and fell to the floor. The dining room door opened and Giles, Buffy, and Willow emerged.

"Joy?" Buffy arched an eyebrow when she noticed the young slayer lying there in front of the door.

"Eavesdropping?" Giles asked with a slight grin. Joy started to shake her head and then stopped and nodded. "Then I suppose I do not have to repeat everything that we were previously discussing." Joy shook her head. "Buffy, help her up and get her back to the couch." Giles instructed. Buffy quickly helped Joy stand and wobble back to the couch. "Joy, we will not do anything without your permission, but I do think it would be best if you were not to return to your aunt and uncle."

Joy bit her lip hesitantly. "Without my aunt and uncle, I'll have nowhere to go."

"That's not true Joy," Buffy told her. "You'll stay here with us."

"Really?" Joy's eyes widened. "Buffy I don't know..."

"Don't even try to fight this Joy," Buffy demanded. "If we can persuade your aunt and uncle not to push their legal custody of you then you will live here with us."

Joy nodded. "Thank you."

"Now, the only question will be how to pay the bribe." Buffy looked at Giles. "I don't want them to involve the law or else we'll never win." Buffy rolled her eyes. "Social services have a difficult enough time accepting my custody of Dawn, I doubt they'd want me taking on another teen."

Giles agreed, "I am not certain how much your relatives will demand from us, but I will do my best to convince them to leave the law out of it all."

Joy sighed. "Money won't be a problem."

"What do you mean?" Buffy asked.

"I have money." Joy stated simply.

"Yes, but Joy, I am certain your relatives are going to wish for a good sum..." Giles began.

Joy shook her head. "Don't worry Rupert, I've got plenty. That's one thing that I've never had a problem with." She shrugged. "In fact that's really the only reason my aunt and uncle actually took me in. My parents' will left them a good amount of money but they're only allowed to receive a little each year until I turn eighteen."

"And what happens when you're eighteen?" Buffy asked.

"They're paid a final amount and I'm set free." Joy explained casually.

Giles cleaned his glasses quickly before speaking. "So, do you suppose your aunt and uncle would 'set you free' earlier if you paid them the entirety now?"

Joy shrugged. "They might. Or they might not just to piss me off. It really depends on their mood I guess."

"Well, we'll talk to them. Don't worry Joy, we'll figure this all out." Buffy assured the young slayer. "Until we do though, you're going to be staying here with us anyway. There's no way you're going back there and that's final."

Giles turned to his demanding slayer with a sigh. "It may not be as simple as that Buffy, but we will definitely do our best." He sat down by Joy on the couch. "Joy, if you are not comfortable with this arrangement, please do not hesitate to let us know."

Joy laughed loudly. "How could I not be? If it works out, I mean, I'll not only be away from my family but I'll be living with my best friend." She smiled at Dawn. "I know I don't always seem that grateful, or well even treat you guys that well, but I do really appreciate all that you're trying to do for me. It's more than anyone else has ever done..." She stopped talking as she realized what she was saying. _They have been good to me. They've all been good to me, even Angel and Spike. _She looked down at her hands with shame. _Especially Angel. _"Buffy, I know you're not going to like this, but I have to go somewhere." She struggled to her feet and tried to act as strong as possible.

"Joy, you can't go anywhere right now. You can barely walk by yourself." She shook her head. "Sit back down. You're not going anywhere until you're completely better. Got it?"

"I have to Buff," Joy insisted. "I promise I'm fine, but I have to do something."

"Fine, then I'll come with you just to make sure you're okay." Buffy decided. "Where're you going?"

"Buffy, no offense, but this is something that I've got to do alone." Joy started hobbling towards the door.

"Well, you can't drive yourself. At least let me drive you and then you can go and do whatever it is that you just have to do, alone, okay?" Buffy put her hands on her hips. "That's my final offer.

Joy sighed. "Fine."

Buffy grinned. "Alright, just let me find my keys."

"Take my car," Joy suggested. "I'm sort of in a hurry."

"Aren't you going to change first?" Buffy asked.

Joy glanced down at the borrowed pajamas she was wearing. "No, I just want to get this over with. It's important."

"Okay," Buffy shrugged. "I guess we'll be home soon."

Dawn frowned. "I thought we were going to spend our day not at school together."

"Sorry," Joy apologized. "I guess you can come if you want. But you'll have to stay in the car with Buffy..."

"Okay!" Dawn leapt off the couch and rushed to the front door to join them. "Let's go."

Giles and Willow waved as the three girls headed out to Joy's car, with Joy leaning on Buffy for support.

"So, where exactly are we going, Joy?" Buffy asked as she started backing the car out of the driveway.

Joy hesitated. "Umm, actually, I know it's going to sound weird, but I don't know exactly."

"Umm, okay..." Buffy frowned. "So where am I supposed to be driving to? You've got to give me some sort of information, Joy."

"I need to see Angel." Joy stated. "But, I don't know where he lives. He's never told me. But, I have to find him."

Buffy sighed. "Alright, I've got an idea how we can find him, but I can't make you any promises."

Joy didn't questions Buffy's idea and they drove quickly to the cemetery. As Buffy parked the car Joy frowned. She didn't understand how they would be able to find Angel at the cemetery in the middle of the day. But, she didn't debate the matter with Buffy as the older slayer helped the injured out of the car. Dawn followed eagerly. Buffy led the way through the maze of marble gravestones until she reached the door of an ancient looking crypt.

"Umm..." Joy hesitated at the door but Buffy opened it boldly and helped Joy hobble in. Dawn also seemed rather confident about entering the dark, musty space. "What're we doing, Buff?"

"Just trust me, okay, Joy?" Buffy hurried Joy past the shabby 'decorations' of cobweb covered broken furniture and tall candlesticks. Joy thought they were strange items to be found in an old crypt but Buffy seemed very sure of herself and so Joy didn't question again. Dawn pranced ahead of the two slayers towards the far end of the crypt. She stopped and bent down to open a type of door in the floor.

Joy frowned. "Is that a trap door, in a crypt?"

Buffy shrugged. "Yea, I guess you could call it that." She motioned for Dawn to proceed and in a moment Dawn had disappeared through the opening into whatever existed below. "Come on Joy, I promise that it's perfectly safe." Buffy reassured Joy when she noticed the young girl's redundant apprehension. She helped Joy over to the opening and down the crudely carved steps that led downwards into a dimly lit space below.

"Buffy..." Joy was still confused but she allowed Buffy to continue leading her into the strange underground area. It seemed like a room of some sort. It was in much better order than the entrance of the crypt was. The downstairs of the crypt opened up into a living space, actually furnished with a television, decorative rugs, and even a bed in the far corner. Ornate candelabras were mixed in with ordinary lamps for light. "Where are we?" Before Buffy had a chance to answer Joy noticed something moving in one of the few shadows in the corners of the room.

"Slayers," The familiar voice emerged with the person from the shadows.

"Spike?" Joy held back a gasp.

"Okay, Joy, I know you probably weren't expecting for me to bring you here and I would have told you, but I didn't want you to get mad. It's just that, you want to see Angel and I don't have a clue who else to ask!" Buffy whispered in a rushed explanation. Spike had cautiously started to approach the three girls. He kept a nervous eye on Joy who was watching him with equal hesitance.

"Umm, well, this is enjoyably awkward now isn't it." Spike grunted as he lit up a cigarette. The pain in Joy's ankle had returned with seemingly full force and her legs started to tremble. Spike rolled his eyes. "Come on and get her seated. She's going to collapse if you keep her standing any bloody longer." He motioned to the bed and Buffy let Joy sit. "Now, maybe you can explain to me what you're doing here, 'cause if I remember correctly, not too long ago I was kicked out of your home." His voice didn't really sound as irritated or as angry as his words would imply. The way his eyes kept darting towards Joy and then back to Buffy quickly made him actually seem quite concerned about the young girl. Joy felt certain that he was worried about her and that feeling almost made her smile.

"Spike, you know why I sent you away," Buffy admonished the vampire. She glanced at Joy. "We're here because we need your help."

"My help, eh?" He shrugged. "I'm not sure how much help I'd be good for."

"Actually, we just have a question for you." Buffy explained. She glanced at Joy again wondering if the young slayer would talk to Spike or not. Joy didn't seem to be much in a talking mood. She was tensely perched on the end of the bed, nervously picking the chipped black nail polish off of her fingernails. "Joy wants to find Angel, but she doesn't have any idea where he's been staying. I thought that maybe you would know since you were with him last night."

Spike glanced at Joy who was watching him steadily. He nodded slowly. "Yea, sure I know where's he staying. But, I'm not sure he'd care to have you all knowing."

"Spike please," Joy surprised herself by speaking to the vampire. "Last night was...a mess...I'm really not sure I meant anything I said..." She shook her head. "Anyway, I really need to find Angel. He needs to understand how disoriented I was. I've never had a better friend then Angel and I need him to know that." Her voice caught with the threat of tears and she quickly cleared her throat, struggling to stay controlled. "I need to apologize to him. Please tell me where he is."

"Do you think I should have apologized to Spike?" Joy asked as Buffy helped the young slayer back into the car after leaving the crypt.

"I'm sure he understood, Joy." Buffy decided. "Spike's good with that sort of thing."

"Yea, he's had to deal with plenty of Buffy's pissy moods." Dawn piped in from the back seat.

"Quiet Dawn," Buffy snapped calmly. "But she's right, Joy. Spike's been through plenty with me and I'm sure that he can handle your moods just as well."

Joy nodded silently and contemplated her various 'moods' as Buffy drove the short distance to the apartment complex that Spike had directed them to. The surprisingly nice apartment building was only a couple of minutes away from 'downtown' Sunnydale. The four story high apartment building was probably one of the few actually decent living complexes in the tiny town of Sunnydale.

"I'd like to go up alone, Buffy." Joy told the slayer as Buffy helped her out of the car.

"He's on the third floor, Joy," Buffy reminded the younger girl. "You'd have to walk up all those stairs and you can barely even walk." She shook her head. "I'll take you up to his room and then leave you two alone."

Joy nodded her approval to the plan and let Buffy half-carry her up the stairs to Angel's apartment. Joy leaned against the door as Buffy started to back away. "I'll try not to take too long, okay?"

Buffy shrugged. "Take all the time you need, Joy. We'll be waiting in the car."

"Thanks," Joy smiled faintly as she nervously knocked on the door. Buffy walked away slowly, waiting to make sure that they had come to the right place.

"Who's there?" Angel's unmistakable voice called from inside the closed apartment door. Buffy smiled reassuringly to Joy and hurried away.

"Umm, Angel, it's me...Joy." She put her mouth close to the door to reply. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

There was momentary silence and then a shuffling sound and then the unlocking of the door. He pulled open the door and stayed inside the shadows of his apartment, staring at Joy curiously. Neither of them spoke for a minute. Joy wasn't sure what to say and Angel wasn't sure what to expect.

"Are you going to invite me in?" Joy asked hesitantly.

Angel didn't budge even an inch. "I'm the vampire Joy, you don't have to wait for an invitation, you know?"

Joy nodded. "I know, but I would still like to be invited."

Angel stepped back slightly. "Come in then."

Joy sighed and entered the dark room. "Were you sleeping?" She asked, glancing around for any signs of life in the sparsely furnished room. To the right of the entryway was a full kitchen that would have been perfect for a catalog setting, mostly because of its immaculate cleanliness. It looked like the kitchen had never actually been used, then again vampires didn't do much cooking. The dining room was connected to the kitchen without a dividing door. Joy was impressed by the surprisingly nice dining room table and chairs and the equally nice quality of the sofa and television. An open door at the other side of the room showed a back room, probably a bedroom. "Nice place." Angel sighed and didn't answer. "Okay, so you're not in the mood for small talk, understandable, but I don't really know how to start. I'm a little nervous okay?" She wandered over to the couch and sat down. "Last night was, umm, a disaster. I didn't mean for you to find out any of that stuff about me. I never meant for it to become your problem." She cleared her throat. "I'm sorry about freaking out on you too." She stopped. That was all that she could think to say at the moment.

Angel slowly strolled over to the couch and sat down at the opposite end from Joy. "Look, I can't completely blame you." His deep brown eyes seemed to be trying to penetrate into her soul. "I should have told you about me. I'm sorry for hiding it from you for so long."

"I trusted you," Joy momentarily seemed to forget her apologetic mission.

"I know, and I'm sorry," Angel said again. "I just didn't think you'd understand if I told you the truth."

Joy took a deep breath, trying to calm her frustration. "You're right. I wouldn't have understood, and I probably wouldn't have trusted you as much as I did, or do..." She rolled her eyes. "I'm being way too stubborn, I just need to say what I came here to say and get it over with." She stood suddenly and turned her back to Angel so he couldn't see her face. It seemed like it would be easier that way. "The reason I'm here is to apologize, obviously, and to tell you that I really didn't mean anything I said. Well, okay maybe I did a little bit, but really I was just freaking out about the whole vamp thing. Honestly, I _do _believe that you're good, I shouldn't have reacted like that." She paused to take a deep breath.

"Joy..." Angel tried to interrupt but she was on a roll and wouldn't stop to listen to him.

"Okay, so what I came here to say is that I'm sorry." She bit her lip. "I'm so sorry Angel..." The tears started flowing down her cheeks and she couldn't control them. Angel seemed to understand her emotions and he didn't try to speak again. He just let her say everything that she felt she needed to say without interruptions. "I never wanted you to think that I hated you, Angel, I don't hate you!" She sobbed and her shoulders shook tragically. "You have done more for me than anybody that has ever been in my life, Angel! You have treated me better than anyone, you have cared for me more than anyone, and you have done nothing but give me reason to trust you!" Her sobs caught in her throat and she started coughing. Angel quickly stood and hurried to the kitchen, returning seconds later with a glass of water to help her clear her throat. "All I'm trying to say Angel, is that I do trust you. I trust you possibly more than I've ever trusted anyone in my entire life! I don't care that you're a vampire. Honestly, I didn't need Buffy to convince me that you are good, I knew that already." Joy whimpered as her sobs started dying down. "I have never sensed anything but good in you, Angel! I'm so sorry that I ever let myself doubt you!" She gasped with her tears.

"Are you done now?" Angel asked slowly.

Joy nodded. "Yea, I think so. For now, until I think of more ways to apologize."

"Alright, then it's my turn, okay?" Angel asked. "Let me talk for a minute?" Joy nodded again. "Joy, you have every right to be angry with me. I never should have kept so much from you." He took her hands comfortingly. "I am so glad that you came here and told me all this. I was certain that you hated me and that you'd never speak to me again. You have to know that I have really enjoyed getting to know you..."

"You're like my best friend Angel!" Joy interrupted.

"I know Joy," Angel grinned. "Believe me, you mean a lot to me too." He awkwardly patted her hand. It was a friendly gesture, brotherly. "The fact that you came back to me and gave me back your trust after I lied to you for so long...that means a lot." He sighed. "I never wanted to lie to you Joy, it just seemed easier somehow. I knew that you'd been through a lot and I knew that you were going through a lot, though I didn't realize how much you had actually experienced, with vampires that is." He seemed unsure what to say exactly. His words were jumbled and unorganized. "If I had known about your parents, and everything," he shook his head, "I would have told you..."

"Would you have? Really?" Joy sounded doubtful.

"No, you're right, I would have tried harder to hide it from you." Angel decided. "But you know now and you say that you trust me, but Joy, how do you really feel? Don't try to cover up your emotions for my sake. I need to know now, in all honesty, what do you want to do about me? Just say the words and I'm gone, for good. You'll never see me again Joy. Just tell me what to do." He waited.

She didn't respond immediately. She didn't know how to respond. It was a giant question to respond to. Of course, she knew exactly what she wanted to say. There was no way that she wanted Angel to leave! He meant way too much to her. But at the same time...it scared her to think about how much he meant. How important his friendship was. He was still a vampire, no matter how good he was and how much she trusted him. He was the same type of creature that murdered her parents..._no. He's different! _She told herself determinedly. _Angel is good. I know that. He knows I know that. There is nothing bad in him! It's not just his soul. I can tell that he cares about me and about Buffy and about doing good. He's not some pathetic evil vampire. He saved me from myself and my misery. He has been my angel. _"Please don't leave Angel." She finally answered. Softly and with certainty. "I need you to stay."


	31. Chapter Thirty One

Chapter Thirty-One: Struggle to Re-settle

"I'm still not sure this is a good idea Rupert," Joy repeated for probably the hundredth time that evening. "I really wish you all wouldn't get so involved in this. These are my problems…"

"Joy, stop trying to talk us out of helping you." Buffy ordered. "Giles is going to talk to your aunt and uncle and make the arrangements for you to come and live with me. There's no reason for you to argue anymore. It's already been decided, okay?" She squeezed Joy's shoulder slightly to reassure the apprehensive young slayer.

"You guys don't understand…" Joy's voice cracked. Buffy assumed she was close to tears, obviously with reason. It had to be hard for her to be going to confront her aunt and uncle, the only real family she had left. "They're not sane." Joy stuttered. "And we shouldn't have come so late! They're always drunk around this time, they're going to be vicious, and impossible to talk to."

"Then I guess it's good we've got a witch, a watcher, and two slayers…" Buffy grinned.

"And two vampires." Spike's unmistakable accent joined the conversation as he and Angel approached from behind the group.

Everyone was silent, trying to nonchalantly decipher Joy's reaction to the appearance of the two vampires. Her face was slightly emotionless, definitely not upset or frightened. Strangely, she seemed to become more calm when the two demons arrived.

"Sorry we're late, but you know there was the whole sunset issue…" Spike explained hurriedly with a half-grin to break the tension.

"Thanks for coming," Joy responded in barely a whisper. "It means a lot." She moved instinctively to Angel's side and he protectively put his hand over hers.

Giles cleared his throat and started leading the group towards the front door of Joy's aunt and uncle's house. He knocked three times and then stepped back to wait for an answer. It took a minute but eventually the door opened and a sloppily dressed man appeared in the doorway with an open beer bottle in his hand.

"What do you want?" Dale didn't sound too drunk, which was a good sign for the conversation they needed to have. He noticed his niece and glared. "Well, finally decided to come crawling back bitch?" He reached out to grab Joy's arm but Angel quickly stepped in between them. When Dale noticed Angel and Spike he backed up inside the doorway. "Hey, what're you two doin' here…" He seemed suddenly frightened and Joy almost grinned at the impression her two vampire bodyguards had on her uncle.

"We are not here to start an argument with you, Mr., uh, sir." Giles explained officially. "We are here to discuss the matter of your niece."

"What matter?" Dale growled. "There's no matter! The bitch ran off and now she's come back. End of problem. Thanks for bringing her back." Instead of reaching out again, Dale simply nodded for Joy to enter the house.

Joy glanced hesitantly back at Angel. He gripped her hand tightly and walked with her into the house. The others immediately followed, ignoring Dale's rude glare.

"What're you all doin'," Dale exclaimed with minimal slurring. "You can't just barge in on my property! This is trespassing…I'll call the cops on you…" He wobbled slightly as he marched after the group that was already taking seats in the living room.

"That's a great idea, why don't you call the cops, I'm sure they'd love to hear all about how you threw your niece through the window." Buffy raised an eyebrow. "The glass is still shattered and she's covered in bruises for proof."

Dale quieted for a moment and stared at each of the people in turn. Giles was sitting confidently in a straight backed chair with his hands folded formally, staring straight into Dale's eyes. Buffy and Willow were seated together on the sofa, both of their faces were frozen with threatening frowns. Dawn leaned against the wall next to Spike. She was doing her best to look menacing but of course she was failing miserably. Spike on the other hand didn't even have to glare much and Dale couldn't be more afraid of him. Then again, Dale had experienced Spike's violence first hand and wasn't exactly anxious to anger him again. Joy had taken the sofa opposite Buffy and Willow, with Angel still glued to her side. She seemed unusually afraid. Angel had never seen her so timid and nervous, except for the other night when he had found her being abused. Dale sat nervously on a chair and fidgeted uncomfortably waiting for an explanation.

"You see, the police would be the obvious and the simplest solution, however, that would involve child services and foster care for Joy, and all that could be come much too complicated for our interest." Giles spoke in his official watcher-librarian voice. "We are here to make a deal with you, and your wife. Is she around by the way?"

"Uh, yea, sure," Dale started acting a little defensive. "Why?"

"Would you ask her to join us, please?"

Dale grunted and hollered loudly without bothering to leave the room. "Jo, get in here."

"Stop your yelling I'll be there in a minute." A woman's voice responded from another room.

"Now woman!" Dale shouted again.

A moment later Jo appeared in the doorway. Before she had a chance to rebuke her husband she noticed all the others and her eyes widened in shock and a little bit of fright, especially when she recognized Angel and Spike.

"They're here to talk about the brat." Dale nodded towards their niece.

"What about her?" Joy sat next to her husband.

"You see, we are here to make sure that Joy never returns to your custody." Giles explained bluntly. "We can handle this one of two ways. Either we call the police and let them deal with everything through the law, or else we settle it here and now our way, without ever involving the law. Understood?" Dale and Jo stared blankly, barely even blinking. Rather they were in an alcohol stupor or they really just weren't following what the watcher was saying. "Joy has informed us of the arrangement that her parents planned out in their will." Jo and Dale looked at him blankly. "The arrangement that gives you a certain amount of money each year that Joy is living with you, until she is of legal age."

"That's none of your business!" Jo exclaimed.

"Hear me out, please, ma'am." Giles continued with a carefully steady voice. "According to the legal will, you will only be receiving payments for a little under two more years, and then you will receive one final payment and that is all. Nothing more, ever again." He removed his glasses. "Do you really think it is worth it, since you obviously do not value your niece in the least…"

"Excuse me…" Jo pretended to be offended but she sucked at acting. "Get to your point."

"We are willing to make you a deal." Giles spoke slowly as though making sure they understood every word. "We are prepared to pay you double the amount that you would ultimately receive, today," Their interest was obviously peaked, "if you will turn custody of Joy over to us without involving anyone else."

"That's all?" Dale seemed too excited.

"And you are never to try and contact her again." Buffy added.

"Why should we agree to this deal?" Jo asked hesitantly.

"Because if you don't, we'll have the cops over here in under a minute and they'll bust your asses and you won't see a cent!" Spike told them.

Dale and Jo exchanged glances and then stared at their niece. Joy stared back blankly. "Well, sweetie, I don't know if we want to just let you go so easily. After all, you're family…"

"Bull shit!" Joy exclaimed, leaping off the couch, trying not to put too much weight on her still aching ankle. "You just want to see how much money you can weasel out of us! Well, Rupert's told you the deal, you can either take it or leave it. Either way I'm out of this house today."

Angel stood at Joy's side, letting her lean on him for balance. His hulking height was obviously intimidating because Dale and Jo quickly answered, backing up slightly in their chairs.

"We'll take the deal. But, we don't ever want to hear from any of you again either!" Jo decided.

"God, she finally says something worthwhile!" Joy threw up her hands in mocking exclamation. She should have kept quiet because her sarcasm was just what was needed to tick off her aunt and uncle.

"I changed my mind. She's not leaving us. We're her guardians and that's final." Jo stood as though the conversation was over.

"Excuse me?" Joy frowned. "What the hell is that supposed to mean? Haven't you been listening. I'm not staying here with you, and _that's _final!"

"Joy, please sit down." Giles instructed. She didn't budge from her feet. She felt more powerful when she was standing, even if she was having to slouch to favor her hurt ankle. When she started to tremble, half from pain and half from nervousness, Angel came to her side and led her back to the couch. She slowly sat down.

"Alright, now can we please talk about this in a rational matter." Giles asked. "You understand that we are willing to offer you a good sum of money, correct?" Both Jo and Dale nodded dumbly. "You will be freed from all your guardian bonds to Joy and you will never have to worry about her well-being again. All you have to do is agree to let her go."

Dale shrugged but Jo continued to be stubborn. "Absolutely not. She's our niece and we're not letting her go."

"You don't care shit 'bout her!" Spike exclaimed angrily. "You're just determined to keep her to piss us off!"

"Spike…" Giles spoke softly trying to calm the vampire.

"No Giles, let him speak." Buffy urged. Spike looked at her in surprise and for a minute couldn't speak.

"Uh, right, well as I was saying, you've got no reason to keep her!" Spike stepped closer to Dale and Jo, ominously looming over them. He could smell their growing fear and he had to fight the urge to grin at his near defeat. "And so you should let her leave, now, with us." He growled. "And then no one will get hurt!" He couldn't resist to add a threat.

"Get the hell out of my house!" Dale stood to make his height more even with Spike's, but Spike was still a couple of inches taller.

"Try and make me!" It wasn't Spike's style to back down. He glared menacingly until Dale dropped back into his chair. "Now as I was saying, we're leaving now, _all_ of us, including Joy." Spike motioned for all the Scoobies to stand and then held out his hand towards Joy. She hesitantly stood and took his hand, standing nervously at his side. "Giles will pay you the money he said he would, he's too moral to jip you entirely, even if you are bloody morons." Spike nodded to Giles who stepped forward and handed a wad of bills to Dale.

"There is half the amount you will receive. The rest will be given to you after Joy removes all of her personal items from your house. You can expect her back here in a couple of days." Giles led the others towards the front door.

"I don't expect any more trouble from either of you." Spike glared and kept a firm arm around Joy's waist as he walked her out of the house.

As soon as they had all loaded into the car Joy started crying. She hated herself for letting her new 'family' see her emotionally weak, but she couldn't make herself stop the tears. She sat between Angel and Spike, her face buried in her hands as she sobbed. The two vampires sat rigid on either side of the miserable young girl, not quite sure how to act or what to say. Angel had his hands clasped tightly in his lap as he continually glanced over at Joy and then back out the window uncomfortably. Spike stared at her; his insides felt twisted with emotional captivation. Slowly he let his hand rest on her trembling knee. Her crying continued and she didn't seem to notice his touch.

"Joy, are you okay?" Buffy turned around from the passenger seat with worry.

Angel glanced at the young slayer and then nodded at Buffy. "She'll be fine. She just needs time." His eyes connected with Spike who nodded in unusual agreement.

"Joy, you're free from them." Buffy spoke gently. "You're going to be living with us now, and you'll never have to see your aunt and uncle again." She paused. "That's good right?"

Joy sniffed and nodded. "I'm sorry for crying," Joy tried to laugh off her emotions but it was useless. "I'm very grateful for everything that you guys have done for me." She shrugged. "I don't know why I'm such a mess!" She tried to clear the tears from her throat.

"Don't worry about it," Buffy encouraged the girl. "It's completely understandable for you to be emotional about all this. You've been through a lot in the past few months, and now you're breaking out on your own…well on your own with us…" Buffy hesitated. She wasn't quite sure what to say. "I hope you'll feel comfortable with us…"

Joy sighed and nodded, adjusting her seated position casually causing Spike to pull his hand away quickly. She hugged her arms to herself and took deep breaths in and out as her crying slowly ceased. Angel and Spike watched over her together, both caring more about her than they had cared about anything in quite a long while.


	32. Chapter Thirty Two

Chapter Thirty-Two: New Arrangements

"Are you sure you don't mind sleeping on the couch, again?" Joy asked Riley for the tenth time that night.

"Look, I've already told you a hundred times that I'm fine with the couch. If you ask me again I'm going to have to tie you down in the bed to make you stay there!" Riley threatened.

"Hmm…how'd you know I was into that sort of thing?" Joy joked as she headed up the stairs to the second floor. "Thanks Riley. I hope you sleep well!"

"You too," Riley waved to her as he settled down on the couch to sleep.

"Hey Joy, I thought you were already asleep." Buffy stopped Joy in the hallway.

"I'm on my way to bed right now. I was just double checking with Riley." Joy explained as she continued towards Buffy's room that she was borrowing until the extra bedroom was cleared of all the various items being stored there and she would have her own bedroom.

"Don't worry about Riley, Joy, he's been in government work forever. He's had to deal with plenty of strange sleeping arrangements. The sofa's not a problem for him." Buffy followed Joy to her room. "Is there anything you need?"

"Buffy, I doubt that I'll ever be able to repay you for everything that you've already done for me. I appreciate it all more than you'll ever understand, but I'm here now and I need to not feel like I'm your charity case or something." Joy explained as she stood in the doorway of the bedroom. "I am completely capable of taking care of myself. I am totally grateful for having a place to live but I don't need you all to baby me, okay?"

Buffy backed off. "Okay, I get it. Goodnight."

"Goodnight." Joy watched Buffy walk back down the hallway to Dawn's room where she was sleeping for the time being and then she closed the bedroom door.

Sleep wasn't even an option and Joy knew that before she even laid down. Usually the young slayer was incredibly talented at masking her feelings and controlling her emotions, mostly because she had so much practice. Lately, however (especially tonight) as Joy lay on the bed, tucked under the covers and squeezing her eyes shut trying to force herself to sleep, unwanted tears began forming behind her closed eyelids, begging to be released. She rolled onto her stomach to muffle her sobs as she began to cry. It was as though she was trying to cry away everything that had happened in the past year. It was a lot to wash away and she didn't stop crying for most of the night.

The next morning she woke up hoarse and her eyes were red and swollen. She took a long shower, washing her face with cold water to try and reduce the splotchy appearance of her dried tears. Even after washing her face though, she still looked a mess and she didn't want to be seen by the others. They would definitely know that she had been crying. She procrastinated leaving the bedroom as long as possible but eventually the others realized she was awake and came to retrieve her for breakfast.

"Joy, Willow made French toast…your favorite right?" Buffy spoke through the closed door after knocking. Joy didn't answer right away. "Joy, aren't you awake?"

"Yea, just a minute," Joy replied from inside the room. She hurriedly covered her red face with powder before opening the door. "Good morning." She tried to sound cheery but her voice was still a little scratchy from crying for so long.

"Are you okay?" Buffy asked with concern.

"Yea, I'm fine." Joy cleared her throat and stepped past Buffy and headed down the hallway towards the stairs, trying her best not to limp on her sore leg. "I just had a rough night. No big deal."

"Are you sure?" Buffy followed at the younger slayer's heels.

"Yea." Joy answered simply, ending the conversation.

Buffy didn't push the subject any farther. She followed Joy silently down to the dining room and sat at the table with all the others who were already there waiting.

"Are we going to school today?" Dawn asked immediately. "Because I really don't want to." She smiled sheepishly. "I haven't exactly finished the paper that I was supposed to have written for English…"

"Dawn!" Buffy scolded half-heartedly. She glanced at Willow who was trying to hide her grin. "Whatever Dawn, I don't care if you go to school today or not. Just realize that you're going to have a lot of catching up to do next week."

Dawn nodded, "I know, don't worry I'll be able to catch up fine."

"I don't care about school, I just wish my damn leg would heal!" Joy decided as she helped herself to another slice of French toast.

"Joy, it's only been two days!" Willow reminded the anxious young girl.

"Yea, even with your slayer healing powers, it's going to take a while for your ankle to heal completely." Buffy commented with a shrug. "And until you are healed one hundred percent you are going to be taking a break from patrolling."

"Whatever!" Joy replied, louder than necessary. "I'm good enough to patrol."

"No you're not!" Buffy insisted. "And as long as you're living under my roof you'll live by my rules…" she stopped herself when she realized how controlling she was being. Noticing the fiery glare forming in Joy's bright turquoise eyes she tried to correct herself. "I didn't mean that…umm…Joy you know that I want you to feel at home here…I'm sorry…I'm so used to playing mom for Dawn…"

Joy shook her head. "Forget about it, it's fine." She was lying and it was sort of obvious, but nobody wanted to make things any more awkward than they already were. "Thanks for breakfast, Willow." Joy stood up as soon as she had finished eating. "I'm kind of tired. I think I'm going to rest for a while." She headed towards the stairs.

"Are you okay Joy?" Buffy asked.

"Yea, I just need rest. I'll be fine." She lied again and stumbled up the stairs until she could collapse on her bed.

She didn't leave the room for the rest of the day. She knew they probably didn't understand her emotions and that was just fine with Joy, but she still didn't want to be around them. She needed time by herself in order to sort out her frustrated confusion. She was very grateful for Buffy's hospitality and for all the scoobies offered friendship, but Joy did not want to be coddled. If she thought that she was well enough to go out then she could go out. It wasn't Buffy's decision to make. She was not her mother!

By eleven o'clock, Joy had heard everyone retire to their rooms for the night, except for Buffy who was just preparing to leave to patrol. Joy laid still on her bed listening as Buffy left the house and locked the front door behind her exit. Watching from the window, Joy waited until Buffy disappear down the dark sidewalks towards the nearby graveyard, then she prepared for her own escape. She dressed quickly in clothes that were appropriate for the night that she planned on having away from the pointless paranoia of the whole household.

At eleven thirty Joy quietly slid the bedroom window open and leaned far out, estimating how easily she would be able to climb out onto the roof and then the distance that she would have to drop to the ground. She'd attempted more difficult feats than this before. She held the thin leather strap of her purse tightly with her teeth and straddled the window frame, carefully placing her tall stiletto heel on the roof ledge just beneath the window. She swung her other leg around and squatted down until her hands had found the ledge. She slowly leaned out over the edge to see how far down the ground was. It was at least a ten foot drop and she knew that it would hurt her ankle if she just jumped off of the roof, and since she wasn't an idiot she started looking around for an alternative way down. A few feet away from where she was perched a tree grew relatively close to the roof and Joy decided that it would be the easiest and safest way to reach the ground. Shuffling her feet carefully along the ledge of the roof, Joy made her way over to the tree. Balancing dangerously in her stilettos, Joy stretched out her arms until she could reach one of the thick branches. She took hold of the tree and let her feet slip off the roof and wrap around the tree trunk.

After she had safely landed on the ground, Joy quickly straightened out her rumpled clothes and glanced around to make sure that she hadn't woken anybody in her escape. When she was certain of her safety Joy crept into her car and started it, hoping that it would be quiet and then before anyone had a chance to wake and see her she sped out of the driveway and down the vacant streets in the opposite direction from the cemetery towards the Bronze. It was the perfect solution for her need to escape the confines of the Summers' good intentioned but way overly protective house.

She parked behind the club and didn't waste any time locating the back entrance that was supposed to be reserved for employees and hired musicians, but she wasn't in the mood for a crowd of people pressing at the front door to enter. She slipped up against the shadows of the club wall and crept into the back room of the club trying to blend in with the band's crew. With a smile and a wink she was able to maneuver away from the workers and melt into the club, crowded with dancers.

Barely taking a second to survey the room for interesting man-prey, Joy instantly made her way to the bar and ordered a beer before moving to the front of the dance floor, close enough to touch the stage. As always, it wasn't necessary for Joy to have a dancing partner in order to enjoy herself. She kept her eyes glued to the band on stage and skillfully matched her movements to the rhythm of the music. The lead guitar player noticed the attractive young girl dancing close to the stage and moved slowly along the edge of the stage in order to get closer to where she was dancing. When Joy realized that he was staring at her she smiled slightly with an innocently flirtatious sparkle in her eyes. He grinned and played for the rest of the song with his eyes fixed on her. Joy danced sultrily, more than usual, all for the purpose of attracting the most attention as possible, especially from the handsome musician on stage.

At the end of the song Joy made sure that the guitarist could see her as she slowly strolled away from the stage, weaving in and out of the crowd, making her way towards the bar, depositing her empty beer bottle at a vacant table along the way. She took her seat with success because only a second after she sat down the musician had taken the seat next to her.

"Hi." He grinned at her.

"Hey," Joy replied with a sweet smile.

"I'm Greg," he introduced himself and held out his hand in greeting.

Joy shook his hand softly but didn't offer her name. "Hi Greg." She looked away from him, pretending not to be interested and Greg frowned.

"Umm, I noticed you dancing…" Greg said slowly. "You seemed to have noticed me playing too…" He was fishing for conversation but she wasn't being very talkative. She smiled at him politely, but very briefly, and then turned back to try and get the bartender's attention. "Here, let me buy you a drink!" Greg offered quickly. He called the bartender over and ordered himself a beer. "What'll you have doll?" He asked Joy.

She smiled at the bartender, "I'll have a martini, dirty, with two olives." She silently prayed that the server wouldn't ask for her ID. This musician was way too attractive for Joy to be humiliated in front of. Luckily the V-neck of her dark red halter revealed enough cleavage to distract the bartender and he served her the drink without hesitation.

"Dirty, huh?" Greg grinned and moved his bar stool closer to Joy and leaned on the counter so that their faces were only a few inches apart. "Come on, tell me your name beautiful!"

"Beautiful?" Joy smiled slightly. "I like that." She glanced at the stage where the band was starting another song. "Don't you need to be back on stage?"

"Not really, the guys can play this one without me." He let his hand slowly reach out to hers. "Besides, there's no way I could focus. I can't think of anything but you!"

"You're a smooth talker, aren't you?" Joy couldn't continue to ignore him.

"I can be when I try." He admitted with an unconscious wink. "So, what's a pretty young girl like you doing in a place like this so late at night, all alone?"

Joy thought about why she was there, and about everything that had been going on in the past couple of weeks. The tension started building and her head started aching. She took a sip of her drink, trying to clear the chaos from her head. She remembered why she had come to the Bronze in the first place, in order to take her mind off of all her problems and have a chance for some innocent fun. She smiled at Greg without speaking.

Understanding her flirtatious smile, Greg stood, taking his beer bottle with him, and held his hand out to Joy. "Well, if you're not interested in conversation perhaps you'd be interested in dancing?"

Joy took her martini in one hand and took Greg's hand with the other and obediently followed him away from the bar and onto the dance floor. Dropping her hand, his arm instantly wrapped around her waist, pulling her body close to his own. She didn't protest. This was exactly what she needed. This was why she had come to the Bronze, to be entertained and to be able to ignore her life.

Ignore. Yes. Ignore everything around her except what she was facing at that exact moment. Greg. A man. A perfect male specimen holding her tightly and eyeing her with admiration and lust. Yes, the lust was feverishly strong. If she gave him the slightest indication he would release his desire with the type of casual passion that she felt she needed. His eyes roamed her face and her body, taking in every beautiful aspect of her sexily clothed figure. His hand began to travel in unison with his eyes. She felt his fingers slide down her spine to the base of her back where his whole hand pressed into her, forcing their bodies to creep closer together. This was her opportunity. It was the perfect time for an indication. He wouldn't move again without her permission, she could tell that he was one of those types, but she would give it to him. She had to. If she didn't she would regret it. It was why she came here, after all. No words were necessary. One simple smile and directional shift with her eyes told him all that he needed to know. His gentlemanly manners vanished instantly. Their bodies separated and his hand circled her wrist leading her immediately away from the crowd to the back room and out the back door. He didn't stop until they reached the alley on the side of the club.

In a second her back was against the cold concrete wall, his body was pressed up tightly to hers. The martini glass dropped from her hand as her arms wrapped around his neck, shattering unnoticed on the pavement. Her lips locked onto his without thought or hesitation. He eagerly pursued her kiss letting his hand brace against the wall, smashing the beer bottle in the process and uncaringly being sprinkled with the remaining alcohol that was still inside.

His tongue excitedly slid along the outside of her mouth, down her chin, and to her neck. He began the pleasurable process of kissing, sucking, and slightly nibbling at her sensitive skin at the base of her neck. She moaned happily and let her fingers massage through his hair, her nails barely scraping his scalp. It was the perfect release for her built up tension. Her eyes unconsciously shut as he continued to form a sizeable hickey on her neck. His arms wrapped around her middle tightly. Their hips rubbed as he pulled their bodies closely together. His hand went to the edge of her shirt and slowly slid underneath the fabric. Her hands rested on his chest and she let out a deep gasp as his fingers tickled her skin. It felt indifferently perfect.

He could smell her. That was strange. Well, of course he was used to being able to smell people, but it was the first time that he had ever consciously picked up her scent. The young slayer's scent. He had left her with the scoobies. They were supposed to keep her safe, with them, not let her go roaming the streets alone, late at night, when she still wasn't fully healed. _Bloody idiots, the lot of them. _Spike fumed as he walked the dark streets of Sunnydale, following the scent.

The scent lead him to the Bronze. _Dumb broad. What's she thinking coming here in her condition? _He was becoming so angry at her decision to leave the house that he almost lost her scent. Standing still just outside the front door of the club, Spike sniffed the air until he managed to rediscover the scent. It was strong. It was active. He frowned. Her scent was closely mixed with another. The new scent reeked of aggression and arousal. Following the scent, Spike was led to the alley at the back of the club.

He stopped short when he saw them. Joy was there with a man. He didn't smell like a vampire, but Spike didn't always trust his instinct. He had unmistakably smelled the aggression and he could see the man's aggression as he ravaged the young slayer. She wasn't even fighting him. _She must be drunk. And the bastard's taking advantage of her! Ballocks slayer! Use some sense! _Spike saw him lower his mouth to her neck and Spike's hands clenched into fists. Joy still didn't fight him.

Then he heard her gasp. She was in pain! He leapt out of the shadows and lunged at the man, pulling him away from her and shoving him hard onto the pavement. Without even waiting to see Joy's reaction, Spike attacked the confused man, slamming his face repeatedly with his fierce fists. Within seconds the man's face was bloody, his nose broken, and he was hollering for help.

"Spike!" Joy screamed, shocked and desperate. Just as Spike's knee prepared to connect with Greg's stomach, his head exploded with pain allowing Joy the time to tear him off of Greg. "What the hell are you doing?"

Spike held his head and stared at her in alarm. He turned back to the man, still laying broken and bloodied on the pavement. Spike's eyes widened and he shook his head. "He's not a vampire."

"What? No!" Joy knelt at Greg's side and held her fingers to his neck. "You're lucky you didn't kill him!"

Spike analyzed Joy's rumpled hair and smeared lipstick with embarrassment. "So then, you weren't in trouble…" He said slowly. "You two were just…uh…messing around."

"Yea, do you have a problem with me having a social life?" Joy glared furiously. "God dammit Spike!" She stood and moved close to him to make her point. "Were you following me?"

"No," Spike faltered. "I just thought you were in trouble. I just wanted to help…" He gazed at the injured man on the ground. "He's okay right?"

"Barely," Joy sighed. "Just leave."

Spike shook his head. "Let me help, Gidget."

"I think you've done enough." Joy's tone was fiery. "Get away from me."

__

I just wanted to help. Spike wanted to make her understand but he didn't know how to make her listen. "Sure, alright." He started to back away from her. "What are you going to do?"

Joy sighed. "I don't know." There wasn't really anything that she could do. Spike had almost killed the man she was making out with. She had to help him, but she didn't know how to explain everything to him. Tears uncontrollably clouded her eyes. "This is not how tonight was supposed to go!"

"What do you mean?" Spike didn't leave.

"I just wanted to get out, let off some steam, and now this…" She glanced at the limp body and frowned. "I'm doomed to have a complicated life aren't I?"

Spike shrugged. "It's only as complicated as you make it."

"Who died and made you Confucius?" Joy muttered under her breath sarcastically. "I told you to go away."

"I'm not leaving you here to deal with this slayer," Spike decided. "You've got enough going on right now. This was my fault. You shouldn't have to take the blame. Come on, just walk away. No one will know. The bloke will wake up and think he was mugged and you panicked and ran. No harm done." He hung his head. "I honestly didn't mean to get in your way. I just wanted to help. I thought he was attacking you."

Joy sighed. "I know you did. Thanks, I guess. But, you should know that I can take care of myself."

"Come on luv, walk away with me." He held out his hand to her. She walked towards him but she didn't take his hand. He lead her back to her car and helped her into the passenger side so he could drive her home. "What were you doing out here tonight anyway?"

"Like I said, I just needed to blow off some steam." Joy pulled an unopened beer bottle out from under the seat, achieving a lifted eyebrow from Spike's surprise at her alcohol stash.

"You should have come to me. I'm an expert in that area." Spike informed her.

"What, I could have come and made out with you?" Joy opened the bottle and guzzled the alcohol. "You couldn't have given me what I needed tonight."

"Sure I could've." Spike answered without thinking fully. "Wait…I didn't mean that you could've come to makeout with me…that didn't come out right…" He frowned. "Umm…what exactly did you need tonight?"

Joy was silent for a minute. "I don't know exactly. I just had to get out of that house! They treat me like a baby, completely incapable of any mature human thoughts or actions. I needed to feel truly alive."

"And you thought the best way of accomplishing that was to go and pick up some random gent from a club?" Spike grinned. "You're sort of a slut, aren't you?"

Joy glared. "I'm not a slut. I just needed someone to help me take my mind off of things. Sex seemed like the best remedy, at the time…" She realized how loose she was being in the conversation and quickly quieted. "Who are you to judge me?" She turned fierce again. "You're a vampire, for Christ's sake!"

"What does that have to do with anything?" Spike pulled the car off to the side of the road suddenly and shifted it into park. "You know, I get that the idea of me being a vampire makes you a bit uncomfortable Princess, but you've got to bloody move on! Yes, I am basically dead, but I'm not dangerous, and I'm not evil."

"You're a demon." Joy reminded him bluntly.

"Well, yea, but still…" Spike was getting frustrated. "Look Gidget, I was going to try and help you with your stress but I'm not so sure I want to anymore."

She tried to ignore his use of his annoying nickname. "How were you going to help?" Joy glanced out the parked car's window with a confused frown. They were parked next to the graveyard. "Why are we here?"

"The only way Buffy's ever successfully managed to fight her stress is with a real fight. Slaying. You need to slay something, luv." He got out of the car and motioned for her to follow him.

"Buffy wouldn't allow me to patrol with her tonight. She's says I'm not physically well enough." Joy rolled her eyes. "I'm fine though. She just doesn't want to have to watch me, which she doesn't need to anyway." She quickly added. "Because I feel great. My ankle doesn't even hurt." She made her best attempt at walking straight in her high stiletto heels, expertly ignoring the pain that shot through her ankle with every shaky step she took.

"Well, how 'bout we don't tell the slayer 'bout this?" Spike suggested.

Joy couldn't help smiling as she eagerly hurried after the blonde vampire. He was right. She needed a good fight. Sex could have been fun but nothing could assuage her troubled mind like a good battle and a successful staking. She found a broken tree branch on the ground and snapped it in half, making it the perfect stake size.

"I'll sit right here." Spike settled down on the edge of a tombstone. "Holler if you need help."

"Don't worry, I'll be fine." Joy grinned with anticipation as her eyes scanned the dark cemetery, searching for any sign of the undead. Her head had begun to tingle from her slight abuse of alcohol that evening, but she tactfully pushed the dizziness away from her mind. She was strong enough to handle a couple of drinks. There was no way that she could leave this cemetery without an adequate fight.

Finally, a vampire emerged from its hiding place behind a large tree. He had obviously been watching her for a while, debating whether or not he could win a fight against the young slayer. He must have decided that she wasn't a large enough threat because as soon as he made himself visible to her, he lunged with full energy towards the girl. Joy skillfully blocked his attack and threw him to the ground, leaping on top of him instantly. Disregarding all of her training, Joy began a harsh battle with the creature. She wasn't going to stake him quickly. She wanted a fight, and she was going to be sure that he gave her one.

Spike sat silently, watching her, analyzing her movements, and critiquing her condition. He realized that she was not only still in pain, but she was also slightly intoxicated. He sighed deeply wishing that the girl wasn't such a nuisance. _But she is a pretty damn good fighter. _He grinned as Joy flung the idiot vampire into a gravestone, shattering the marble stone into pieces. But the energy of her rage started to fade suddenly. As she straightened up she swayed a little and her hand touched her head briefly, revealing her unsteadiness. Spike felt the urge to jump to her aid, but he restrained himself, knowing that she needed to end this fight alone.

Joy shook off her queasiness and resumed her fighting position as the vampire leapt back to his feet and leapt to attack her again. She tumbled backwards beneath him, entirely unsteady on her feet and in seconds he had her pinned to the ground. Spike waited for her call for help but she didn't cry out. Using all the strength she could muster in her weak state, Joy shoved the strong vampire off of her, crawled onto him and planted the stake hard in his chest. As he disintegrated her head exploded with random images. They were so realistic, and so horrible!

For a moment she sat immobile in his dusty remains, trembling with weak confusion. _What was that? What the hell was I seeing? _She squeezed her eyes shut tightly, trying to remember exactly what she had seen. She shook her head miserably.

Spike watched her in silence after she had staked the vampire. She looked upset. She looked a little shaken up. He frowned. He'd never seen Joy shaken up before. She actually looked like she was trembling. He instinctively stood and watched her protectively, but still from an appropriate distance so that she didn't feel suffocated by his guard. Then her breathing seemed to increase and her shaking became more obvious. Spike took a step towards her uncertainly. Then she collapsed. She fell, unconscious, face down in the dust-covered grass. He ran to her instantly.

"Joy," He knelt beside her and rolled her over onto her back. Her body was trembling violently and her face was as pale as a ghost. "Joy, can you hear me?" There wasn't the slightest response from her limp body. Spike thought quickly and scooped her up into his arms.

He carried her through the maze of dark graves to the crypt that he occupied at the far end of the cemetery. Carefully holding her with one arm, Spike managed to open the door to his 'home' and carry her inside. He looked around the sloppy furnishings of the main room with a frown. Everything was dirty and nothing was a suitable place to deposit the young slayer's body. Shifting her so that her body was slung mostly over one of his shoulders, Spike lifted a hatch in the floor and cautiously descended the ladder that led down to the spacious underground area which he had transformed into his bedroom.

"There you go Gidget," Spike whispered as he gently placed Joy on the large, soft bed. "Rest a bit and feel better." He covered her with a blanket and then pulled a chair over beside the bed where he sat, watching her silently, so he would be ready when she came to.


	33. Chapter Thirty Three

Chapter Thirty-Three: More Confusion

"What happened…" Joy murmured softly as her eyelids twitched. She rolled over onto her side and pulled the blanket up under her chin. She squinted in the dim candle light. "Spike? Is that you?"

Spike sat up straighter in the chair. He had began to drift off to sleep but the second she stirred he had reawaken to give her his full attention. "Joy, luv, are you alright?"

She sat up and glanced around the dark cave room frowning. "Where am I?"

"I brought you home, to my crypt…" He explained slowly.

"I'm in your crypt?" Joy gasped at the realization. "Why? What am I doing here?" She was still half-asleep and a little drunk. "Why did you bring me here?" She seemed to suddenly realize that she was in his bed and panicked. "Why am I in your bed? Okay…umm…I know that I was drinking a little bit too much and I get that you're a vampire and all that, but I never thought that you'd take advantage of me!"

"Whoa, slow down there lil' slayer!" Spike stood and took a few steps back away from the bed. "I didn't…I wouldn't…"

"Calm down Spike," Joy sighed. "I know you would never touch me. I just enjoy messing with you." She coughed and squeezed her eyes shut. She moaned. "God, my head feels like it's on fire. Does it look like it's on fire?" She dropped her head in her hands and continued to moan.

"Are you alright Gidget?" Spike cautiously moved back to the bedside.

"Yea, I'm just a little confused. I don't really remember how I got here…" She glanced down at her clothes. "Okay, I sort of remember the Bronze…at least I hope I was at the Bronze, or else I really don't know why I'm wearing my club clothes."

"You honestly don't remember any of the night?" Spike questioned.

"Well," Joy scrunched up her forehead trying to remember something. "Oh, I remember sneaking out the window!" She sighed. "But that's sort of it."

"Do you remember the club? The guy?"

"Guy?" Joy shook her head and then stopped. "Oh. Yea, it's coming back to me now." She bit her lip, a little embarrassed. "Spike, I wasn't doing well last night, emotionally, and I went to the club for some release, and well, I really don't usually do stuff like that I mean with strange guys and all…"

Spike shushed her. "It's alright luv, I'm not going to judge your behavior." He reached out to touch her hand but pulled back before she noticed. "Are you okay, though?"

She shook her head slowly. "My head is a little achy. No big though."

"Do you remember anything about the fight, Joy?"

"The fight?" Joy thought for a minute and then shook her head.

"After the Bronze, I took you to the cemetery and you fought a vampire. You dusted him fine but then you collapsed…"

Joy's head exploded again with the memory of what she'd seen while staking the vampire. "Oh my god!" She moaned as the images once again vanished from her head. "Oh my god…" she continued to mutter horrified.

"What is it? What's wrong?"

"Oh my god…" She held her head in her hands and started to cry. "It can't be real! It's not real!"

Spike frowned with confusion. "Slayer, talk to me, I don't understand what's happening."

Joy looked up at him with watery eyes. "I saw…things…"

"What sort of thing?"

"Bad things! Horrible things!"

"Things that have happened in your past?" He asked.

She shook her head. "No, they haven't happened yet. But I have the worst feeling that they're going to, soon."

"Come on luv, tell me what you saw. We'll figure it out together." Spike encouraged.

"Dawn…" Joy barely whispered her friend's name before her voice cracked and she started trembling again. "It can't happen! It can't be real!"

"What?" Spike demanded.

"I saw Dawn…" Joy gasped as she forced the visions back into her mind. "She was being attacked…oh my god!" Joy's eyes glazed over as she stared at nothing in front of her. Spike could tell that she was seeing whatever she had seen before inside her head, again. "Oh god, oh god, no…"

"Does she get hurt, Joy?" Spike asked softly.

"She gets turned!" Joy replied in a hushed tone. "She's killed and turned." She blinked twice and closed her eyes again. "Why did I see that Spike? What's wrong with me?" Her body was still shaking uncontrollably.

"I knew this girl once, she was a bit crazy actually, but at times she had incredible power." Spike told the frightened young slayer. "She could see things, future things, it was like she could sense evil things that were going to happen. It was an amazing talent for her, she was a vampire after all, but I've never known anyone else who could see things before they happened…" He stopped talking, realizing that his story about Drusilla really had no importance. "Maybe you should talk to Giles. He always seems to know 'bout the strange and unusual."

"I don't want to tell Buffy what I saw." Joy decided quickly. "I don't want to worry her."

"Of course." Spike agreed. "We don't have to tell her. We don't have to tell anyone if you don't want to. But, Giles might know something."

"Yea," Joy gave in. "I'll talk to Giles." She clenched her fists, trying to stop the shaking.

"I could talk to him if you'd like pet?" Spike offered.

Joy forced a smile. "It's okay Spike. Thanks for offering but I can talk to him myself." She slowly climbed out of bed and straightened out her twisted clothing.

"Is your head all clear now?" Spike asked, standing with her and offering her a hand to keep her stable. "No more big bads running around inside of your mind, right?"

"Right, I'm okay for now." Joy sighed. "I've got to go. I'm sure everyone's worrying about where I ran off to."

"I'd drive you home but, well, you'd be driving with a pile of ashes." He led her up out of the bedroom. "I imagine you'll be safe in the daytime though."

"I'd be safe at night too." Joy reminded him.

"Of course you would luv, now run on home to the scoobies and figure out what's going on with your head." Spike ordered.

"Alright," Joy headed for the door of the crypt. "Thanks for taking care of me, Spike." She sighed. "I'm sorry about all the shit I've given you for the whole vampire thing…"

"I get that it still freaks you out…"

"Well yea, but I really have dealt with it. It doesn't bother me that much anymore. It's just easier to deal if I can give you a hard time about it." She shrugged. "I don't know why I choose to screw with you. I don't give Angel a hard time…"

"Well of course you don't. No one ever bothers Peaches." Spike rolled his eyes. "Whatever, it's fine. I get it. See you around, Gidget."

Joy nodded apologetically and left Spike alone in his dark crypt. She limped out to her car tiredly. The sun was bright but she could tell that it hadn't been up for too long yet that day. She wondered how long she was asleep, or unconscious, whichever was more appropriate. During the drive home she thought about what she had said to Spike.

__

Why do I give him such a hard time? She gripped the steering wheel tightly. She hated being confused, especially when she was still so tired. _Sure, I'm still not entirely comfortable with the vampire thing, but with Spike and Angel, it doesn't really bother me either, I guess. Both of them have taken such good care of me…I don't know what I'd have done without Angel to train me and help me accept being a slayer, and Spike…well…he's always been there, whenever I need help. He's been great! _Joy frowned and turned the radio up louder, letting the steady beat pound the frustrations out of her mind.

When she pulled into the driveway back at the Summers' house she realized that the lights were still off. She glanced at her car clock and smiled. _5:15. Everyone's probably still in bed. I can easily sneak back in without them waking up. _She put the car in park and quietly made her way over to the front door. Realizing that she didn't have a key yet, Joy returned to her earlier escape route.

Climbing up the tree was not as easy as climbing down. Especially after the night she had had; first with the drinking and then with the fight and her vision. She again gripped her purse strap between her teeth and jumped up to reach the lowest branch. She skillfully scaled up the tree until she was close enough to leap onto the roof. Her stilettos skidded on the roof but she quickly steadied herself and dropped to her knees and crawled the rest of the way to the bedroom window.

__

I really hope that they're all heavy sleepers. Joy worried as she tossed her purse inside the still open window. She braced her hands on the window frame and hoisted her small body through the window. Unfortunately, Joy had misjudged her leaping skills and when she landed inside the bedroom, she landed with a 'thud' as she crashed into the dresser beside the window, consequently breaking a few fragile knick-knacks that fell to the floor. In minutes, her less-than-graceful entrance had woken most of the household and they were soon in the bedroom doorway gawking.

"Shit," Joy sighed as she noticed everyone at the door. "Sorry about the noise. I was trying to be quiet, but well, I guess I'm a little clumsy." She stood on wobbly legs and tried to stretch out her skimpy clothes to cover more skin. It was a useless attempt and so she gave up. "Umm, okay, some kind of acknowledgement would be appreciated…"

Buffy stepped forward with raised eyebrows. "Joy, where were you?"

"Out," Joy answered simply.

"You snuck out the window?" Willow frowned. "Why?"

"I needed to get out…" Joy shrugged. "I'm sorry that I had to be so sneaky, but honestly Buffy, I feet like you've been holding me under house arrest or something!"

"Well, I'm really sorry that I made you feel that way, but I wish you wouldn't sneak out of the house. Especially in your condition right now…" Buffy started to lecture.

"God not again with this 'condition' shit!" Joy started to clean up the mess she had made of the dresser-top. "Buffy, I'm not paralyzed! I am completely capable of taking care of myself! I know you were my age once, and you were a slayer at that time, you should be able to understand how I feel about all this! You can't keep me from going out, or fighting, patrolling, whatever I might want to do…" She stopped suddenly. "Where's Dawn?"

Buffy frowned at Joy's self-interruption. "Umm, I guess she's still in bed. She's a pretty heavy sleeper." Buffy didn't think the question was very relevant. "Look, I'm sorry that you feel trapped or whatever but…"

"But she's here right? She's home, in her room right now?" Joy asked anxiously.

"Dawn?" Buffy was still puzzled. "Yea, I don't know why she wouldn't be…"

"Weren't you sharing a room with her last night?" Joy started to panic.

Buffy shook her head. "I didn't sleep last night. I came home from patrol late and then stayed up with Riley…talking…"

"Okay we'll discuss how much I _don't _want to hear about your guys' sex lives, later, but right now I need to know, is Dawn here?" Joy pushed past the three standing in the doorway and headed down the hall towards Dawn's bedroom. "Dawn! Dawn?" She called loudly as she limped hurriedly.

Buffy rushed after her while Riley and Willow hung back courteously. "Joy stop yelling, you're going to wake her up!" She grabbed at Joy's arm to pull her back but Joy shook her off.

"Dawn, are you there?" Joy pushed open Dawn's bedroom door and fumbled to find the light switch on the wall. "God dammit Dawn, answer me!"

"Joy stop it!" Buffy watched from the doorway, confused and slightly frightened.

Joy found the light and snapped it on. "Dawn…" She gasped when she saw Dawn lazily roll over in bed and then moan and burry her head in her pillow.

"Oh, that's bright!" She whined. "Turn it off!"

"Dawn…are you okay?" Joy stood in the doorway and tears of relief started unconsciously forming in her eyes.

Dawn slowly uncovered her head and squinted up at Joy. "Yea, I'm fine. A little annoyed at being woken up, but I'm fine. Are _you _okay Joy?"

"Yea, I'm okay. I'm sorry." Joy shook her head, blushing with awkward embarrassment. "I'm sorry I woke you up." Joy started backing out of the room, avoiding eye contact with Buffy.

"Well, I'm awake now!" Dawn complained. Joy made it halfway back down the hallway and collapsed in a heap on the ground. She dropped her head in her hands and her body was once again taken over by the shaking that accompanied the terrifying visions in her head.

"Joy, what's wrong?" Buffy knelt by her side. "Joy, talk to me. What's going on? Where'd you go tonight? What's happening to you?"

Willow also knelt beside the trembling young slayer. "Joy, sweetie, is everything okay?"

"I need Rupert." Joy forced the sentence out as she continued to shake.

"Okay, we'll call Giles." Buffy assured her. "Please, calm down though. I don't understand what's wrong…"

"Get Rupert over here. Please." She started taking long shallow breaths.

"Willow, call Giles!" Buffy instructed. "Riley, help me take her to the bed."

Riley instantly picked the young slayer up off the ground and carried her back to Buffy's room, gently placing Joy on the bed. She was still shaking and her breathing was even more irregular. Buffy sat on the edge of the bed and took Joy's hand comfortingly.

"Sweetie, calm down, Giles will be here soon." Buffy spoke softly. Riley stood beside the bed, not quite sure what to do.

Dawn had wandered into the bedroom lazily, but when she saw Joy's condition she was instantly awake. "Buffy, what's wrong with her?"

"I'm not sure. Willow's calling Giles." Buffy told her sister. "He should be here soon."

"Okay," Dawn hesitated nervously. "She's going to be okay, right?"

"Well, I don't know what's wrong with her, so I can't really say…" Buffy almost jumped when Joy suddenly stopped shaking and sat up halfway, leaning on her elbows for support.

"Sorry if I freaked you out." Joy gasped, trying to catch her breath.

"Okay, what the hell just happened?" Buffy stood with her hands on her hips. Her attitude had snapped instantly from comforting to accusing.

"I need to talk to Giles." Joy insisted.

"He'll be here as soon as possible, but Joy, you're going to have to get used to talking to all of us. Giles isn't the only one that's a part of this group. We all work together." Buffy reminded the young slayer.

__

There's too many conditions with this new living arrangement. I don't like being told what to do! And I definitely don't like not having any options…She laid back down. "Okay, when Giles gets here I'll talk to all of you together."

"Good." Buffy seemed satisfied. "Now, maybe you'd like to tell me where you ran off to last night?"

Joy bit back a bitter retort and sighed. "I went to the Bronze, had a little too much fun with a guy, got picked up by Spike and spent the night in his crypt." A slight smile tweaked up the corners of her lips as she thought about how many different things Buffy could freak about in that simple sentence.

Buffy cleared her throat and took a deep breath, obviously trying to remain calm. "You spent the night with Spike? I was under the impression that you didn't like him very much."

"Well, things change." Joy stated. "Do you think you guys could give me some privacy for a minute, so I could change?" Riley left immediately, followed more slowly by Buffy and Dawn, who still weren't entirely convinced that Joy was alright.

"Giles will be here soon." Buffy whispered to Dawn in the hallway. "Then we'll figure out what's wrong with her."


	34. Chapter Thirty Four

Chapter Thirty-Four: Discoveries

"Well, Buffy has had quite a few prophetic dreams. You could just be having a few of the same types." Giles figured.

"No, I don't think so." Joy shook her head. "First of all, I wasn't asleep. And second of all…well…it was just so specific and well, I don't know, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't just a 'prophetic dream' or whatever."

"What did you see?" Giles questioned, as serious as always.

Joy hesitated and then spoke quickly, editing the truth. "A girl. She was turned by a vampire." She squeezed her eyes shut momentarily. "It wasn't a pretty image and I'd rather not think about it, okay?" She looked at Giles, eager to get past the uncertainty of her vision. "So, what's the deal Rupert?"

"I have no answer for you at the moment." Giles cleaned his glasses resolutely. "Give me some time to research a bit…I will check my books and I will find an answer, I assure you." He returned his glasses to his face. "But I would not worry much about the matter…" He sort of sucked at encouragement talks.

"Rupert I'm seeing people die in my head! How can I not worry?" Joy exclaimed fervently.

"Yes, of course, I see how disturbing this could be for you, but…" He was at a loss of words. He looked to Buffy desperately.

"Just out of curiosity, who did you see in your vision? Who died?" Buffy asked calmly.

Joy didn't answer. She couldn't tell them what she had seen. Buffy didn't need that worry. She could handle this herself, after all, it was her vision. They waited for an answer and so she quickly lied. "Just a girl. I've never seen her before."

Willow stared at her unwaveringly. Joy felt as though her green eyes would bore through her mind and discover the truth. So, Joy quickly looked away.

"Can I be excused now?" She asked softly. The others seemed surprised at her request. "Sorry, but I'm sort of hungry." Joy explained.

"Right, okay sure." Buffy dismissed the young slayer. "Go eat and we'll start the research."

Joy struggled not to run from the room. She sought refuge in the kitchen, drowning her fear and anxiety in a box of pop-tarts.

"Joy," Willow joined her in the kitchen only a moment later.

"Yea?" Joy retrieved the orange juice from the refrigerator.

"I don't want to intrude on your personal affairs or anything, but umm…I couldn't help noticing that you hesitated a little when Buffy asked you who your vision was about…" She paused, trying to read the masked expression in Joy's eyes. "I know that you lying in there. You do know who the person was, don't you?"

Joy bit her lip and made her eyes as expressionless as possible. She could tell that Willow understood her silence though.

"I realize that you don't want to tell us all for some reason, but I think we could help more if we knew who it was…"

Joy shook her head quickly. "I'll handle it. Don't worry. It's not your problem." The young slayer quickly returned the juice to the fridge and darted past Willow, out of the kitchen.

Seeking refuge in her bedroom was becoming a habit for Joy since she had moved in with the Summers. She wasn't used to people caring so much about her that it started to bother her. It was frustrating that they didn't trust her to take care of things on her own, but at the same time, she had never felt more loved. She flopped onto the comfortable bed, wanting to fall asleep and forget about her stress.

__

I hate hiding from my problems. It's not me. Joy whined in her head. _I'm stronger than this. I should be able to talk to them and tell them what's really going on…_but again she convinced herself that it would be easier for her to deal with the problem by herself. It would be easier for Buffy and for everyone else. _I shouldn't be worried so much anyway. It was just a freaky dream, I'm sure it didn't mean anything. I need to see Angel._

She quickly got out of bed with the strange decision to search for her vampire friend. For some reason he seemed like the person to go to when things were screwed up in her life. He was like her big brother and she knew that he cared a lot about her and what happened to her.

She ran down the stairs and waved briefly to the group still gathered in the living room. "I'm out of here for a while. I'll be back soon."

"Wait," Buffy jumped up off the couch and hurried out to the front door to stop Joy from escaping. "Where are you going?"

She hesitated. "I'm, umm, I'm going to see Angel."

"Angel?"

"Yea, I just need to talk to him about something. I won't be gone too long."

"Okay," Buffy seemed to be trying very hard not to control Joy's life. "Be safe."

"I will." Joy smiled politely and continued outside.

"Angel," Joy knocked softly on his apartment door. A part of her was still not quite sure why she was inspired to run to Angel when she was uncertain or afraid. But, she needed to see him. She needed him to tell her that everything was alright. She knocked again. "Angel, please, I need to talk to you." She waited impatiently, shifting her eyes around the outdoor hallway, hoping that she wasn't bothering any of the neighbors. "Angel!" She knocked once more. He had to be home. He was a vampire and it was the middle of the day; he couldn't be anywhere except for his apartment! He'd be a big pile of dust in an instant. She frowned and started to walk away. Before she was more than three feet away from the door, the door was finally opened.

"Wait!" Angel called after her, being careful to stay inside the doorway, out of the sunlight. "I'm sorry, I was umm…asleep and umm…well…never mind, come in."

Joy slowly returned to the door and stepped into the dark apartment. When she had entered the apartment Joy noticed that Angel was only half dressed in a pair of sweatpants; his shirt missing.

"I'm sorry if I disturbed you…" Joy apologized instinctively. "I didn't mean to wake you up. I shouldn't have knocked so much…after the first time I should have realized that you weren't in the mood for visitors…" She hesitated, stepping back towards the door. She fumbled with the doorknob.

Angel pressed his hand against the door, halting her nervous escape. "Joy, I didn't mean to make you leave. I didn't mean to take so long to answer the door either." He paused. "I was umm, indecent," He shrugged. "I was sort of not dressed…"

Joy tried not to smile. "Angel, do you sleep naked?"

"No! Of course not!" Angel attempted to defend his embarrassment. "Well, so what if I do? It's not like anyone's ever around to see me! Well, except for you occasionally."

"I'm sorry, next time I'll wait patiently for you to cover yourself." Joy grinned broadly. "But, of course, I bet you're pretty hot when your…indecent…" His eyebrows lifted slightly and Joy instantly realized what she'd said. "Oh my god, eew, no! I didn't mean that! I don't know what I was saying! Gross!" Angel was frowning. "I mean, I'm sorry that probably sounded really rude, but it's just that you're like a big brother to me, Angel, and I really don't want to think about you that way…"

"Hey, you're the one that said it!" Angel reminded her.

"I know, I'm sorry, it's sort of instinct…" Joy apologized meekly.

"Yea, so, you wanted to talk to me?" Angel turned on a lamp to allow more light into the room. "Do you want something to eat?" He motioned for her to take a seat on the couch while he headed towards the adjoining kitchen to search for food. "Or, maybe you want something to drink…I have water…oh wait I might have some coffee."

"Don't worry about it. I'm fine." Joy assured him. "Willow made a huge breakfast this morning, I think I'm good for the rest of the week."

Angel nodded. "Okay, then let's just talk." He joined her on the couch. "What's going on?"

"Last night when I was patrolling with Spike…"

"You were patrolling with Spike?" Angel seemed surprised, maybe a little hurt. "You won't patrol with me, but you'll patrol with Spike?"

"Angel…"

"No, it's okay, I understand. You're more comfortable with him…"

"That's not it Angel. You know I've always been the most comfortable with you! Like I said, you're like my brother." Joy shrugged. "He found me at the Bronze and wanted to take me home to make sure I was alright." She shook her head. "Anyway, I came here to tell you about what happened to me last night. I, umm, I had a vision sort of."

"What sort of vision?" Angel didn't even question the validity of her vision. He seemed to believe her instantly.

"A bad one." Joy barely even hesitated before telling Angel the entire truth. "Dawn was killed and then turned by a vampire. It was the most horrific thing that I'd ever seen inside my head." She shook with the memory of the horror.

"Have you told Buffy?" Angel had an incredible strength at always keeping her voice calm, even in very complicated and frightening situations.

"Not the specifics. Like the fact that it was her little sister that dies." Joy sighed. "I don't want her to worry."

"So you came to me."

"You're the only person that's ever really been there for me. And I know that I haven't exactly returned the favor but I was just hoping that…"

"Don't worry Joy, you don't have to explain yourself to me." Angel assured her. "I'll always be here when you need me."

"I know." Joy nodded. She tried, and failed, to hide her emotions.

"Joy, I'm appreciate that you came to talk to me. I've missed being able to be here for you." He held out his arms for her and she gladly fell into his comforting embrace. "I'm sure everything will be okay with Dawn. She's got a lot of people looking out for her safety, you know?"

Joy had to agree. Besides Buffy's constant watch, Dawn was also being looked after by Willow, Giles, Xander, Spike, and now Joy herself.

"But still, I don't think it'd hurt if you told Buffy the truth about your vision." Angel encouraged. "Of course it is up to you though."

"Thanks for understanding," Joy smiled. "I should probably go…" She glanced around the sparsely decorated apartment for a clock. "I just needed to talk to someone who really listened to me for a while…"

"You can stay if you want to." Angel offered. "I don't mind."

"Thanks Angel," Joy nodded. "I'd like to actually." She looked towards the kitchenette. "I can cook for you…but then again you don't really eat, do you?" She frowned. "Well, I can clean…" She noticed how tidy everything already was. "But you don't really need that either…umm…"

"Joy, just stay. You don't have to try and earn your keep or anything. Just hang out for a while. I want you to."

"Are you sure I won't be a hassle?"

"Positive. Stay as long as you like. In fact, I'll make you dinner tonight, alright?" Angel seemed excited at the thought. "I'm not really sure what I have here to make, but, umm, well I'll make the best that I can." He stood and headed towards the kitchen to start browsing through his limited food supply. "But until it's time to eat, feel free to watch TV or something. I don't really have much to do here…"

"Actually, I'm sort of tired. If it's okay with you, I'd sort of like to take a nap." Joy smiled. "I haven't really been sleeping well lately."

"Of course, sure, you can sleep in the bedroom," Angel offered. "When you wake up, dinner will be waiting for you."

"Saying 'thank you' is starting to sound redundant." Joy smiled sweetly and withdrew into the bedroom, closing the door behind herself.

She slept for almost three hours. It was the sort of sleep that she had needed. It was completely restful, not at all disturbed or fitful. She didn't even have any dreams that she could remember; nothing bothered her during her naptime. When she woke up she could smell food cooking from the kitchen. She smiled. There was definitely way too much pepper in whatever Angel was preparing, but it comforted her just to know that he was cooking for her.

Joy stretched slowly, not wanting to leave her location on the large, comfortable bed. Adjoining the bedroom there was a bathroom. A warm shower sounded incredibly refreshing at the moment so Joy eventually dragged herself out of bed and wandered over to the bathroom. She found a towel in a cupboard underneath the sink. She wasn't surprised to find a quality brand of shampoo in the shower; she's always thought that Angel took good care of his hair.

The shower was long. She loved being able to enjoy leisure showers without the pressure of the other people in the house needing to use the bathroom. When she finished her shower and started drying off, she heard voices coming from the front room. She wrapped the towel securely around her body and tiptoed out of the bathroom and to the bedroom door, pressing her ear up against the door to listen to the voices.

"You've got to understand that this isn't easy for me to do," Joy recognized Spike's voice instantly. "But I need your help peaches."

"What's going on Spike?" Angel asked calmly.

"It's the little slayer." Spike said. "Last night she had a problem…well actually I'm not sure if problem's the right word but something happened." He paused. "She had a…"

"A vision?" Angel answered before Spike had a chance to.

"Yea, how'd you know?"

"Well, she came to me this morning." Angel confessed. "She was scared. She said that she needed me."

"Why didn't she come to me?" Spike wondered aloud. He obviously didn't mean to speak out loud because he quickly cleared his throat and tried to change the subject. "Did you help her? Comfort her?"

"She didn't want to go home. She asked to stay here, with me, for a while, to sleep." Angel said.

"And you what, sent her home?" Spike sounded upset.

"No. She's still here." Angel said softly. The voices stopped and the next thing that Joy heard was footsteps approaching the bedroom door. She gasped and quickly tried to run back to the bathroom so she wouldn't be caught eavesdropping but Spike was faster and he opened the door before she was halfway there.

"Umm, hi," Joy shyly grabbed at the top edge of her towel, making sure that she was covered enough.

"Oh, sorry…" Spike hesitated in the doorway. "I thought you were sleeping." He started to turn away.

"I'm sorry I didn't come to you Spike." Joy said quietly. "You were great to me last night, I really appreciate your help, but I just needed to see Angel. I needed to talk to him…"

"Of course Gidget, don't worry 'bout it. I understand." Spike continued backing out of the bedroom.

"No really Spike, you are a great friend…" Joy didn't know what else to say. A part of her wanted to say more, to tell him how much she really valued his friendship, but she was at a loss. It didn't feel like the right moment. "I'm going to get dressed really quick and then I'll come out and join you both." Joy decided suddenly, noticing Angel's presence behind Spike.

Both vampires nodded, embarrassedly eyeing her lack of clothing and appropriately moving out of the bedroom, closing the door to give her privacy. When she was alone, Joy began to search through the closet to find something comfortable of Angel's to wear. She finally settled on a pair of sweatpants (she had to roll over the waistband four times and it still threatened to slip off her slim waist) and a simple t-shirt that hung down to her knees. She left her hair down to air-dry and emerged from the bedroom to join the guys who were bickering in the kitchen.

"You can't make ravioli without the sauce!" Spike was saying. "It'll be bloody dry. She won't like dry ravioli!"

"Well, I haven't got any sauce. I didn't plan to make dinner for anyone but myself tonight. I'm surprised I've even got pasta! Usually I'd just heat up a mug of blood…"

"Gross!" Joy exclaimed, cutting into their conversation.

The vampires instantly turned to her with apologetic smiles plastered on their pale faces. Angel stuck a metal soup spoon into the pan on the stove and stirred the cooking pasta.

"Just a hint, but wooden spoons work a lot better for that sort of thing." Joy commented with a know-it-all smile.

"Yea, I don't have one." Angel admitted.

"How can you not have a wooden spoon?" Joy gasped.

"Hey! I'm surprised I even have pasta to cook, or a pan for that matter. Vampire, remember?"

"Right, I keep forgetting." Joy sighed. She was still adjusting to being friends with vampires and it always seemed easier if she just tried to ignore the fact that they weren't exactly breathing people. "Thanks for making me dinner though Angel. I feel really bad for crashing like this." She bit her lip, struggling to admit her gratitude. "It means a lot to me."

"Yea well, you'll just owe me one later, okay?" Angel joked.

She looked at Spike. "I appreciate your concern too, Spike. I realize how hard it must have been for you to come to Angel voluntarily…but knowing that you did it for me…well…thanks a bunch." She smiled at how silly she sounded. "Anyway, I'm starved."

"Well, I'm not sure how edible the food's goin' to be, Gidget." Spike grinned. "Angel hasn't made any sauce for the noodles."

"That's okay." Joy smiled. She crowded her way into the kitchen. "There's a small fact about me that's not exactly very well known…" She started searching through the very empty cupboards until she had found butter, salt, and pepper. That was just about all the ingredients that Angel's kitchen had. She had hoped to find garlic, but considering the whole vampire things she realized that was highly unlikely. "See, I'm actually sort of good in the kitchen…" She dropped the butter into the pan to let it melt with the pasta and generously added the salt and pepper. "Actually, I don't like to brag, but my ex-boyfriend once told me that I was like a cooking magician!" She smiled at the happy memory of Henri. When she was satisfied with the substitute pasta sauce she left it for Angel to serve on plates.

When they all sat down at the table to eat the meal, Joy realized that vampires didn't really eat food. She frowned at the complication.

"Wait, don't you guys sort of have like an all-blood diet?"

Spike and Angel nervously glanced at each other and shrugged. Spike answered. "Sure, but that doesn't mean that we don't like to nibble on some human treats every once in a while. We're sort of like puppies." He grinned but Angel frowned at the explanation.

"Okay…" Joy hesitated. "You guys can have blood if you want. I can handle it…" She was lying and they knew it. She was still learning to deal with the fact that they drank blood, she didn't need to see them in the act. It would undoubtedly freak her out more than she already was.

"It's fine. The pasta is actually quite tasty." Spike decided.

"Good…but you know if you're starving, I really don't mind…" They seemed to be reading through her fake politeness. "No, I'm serious. If you're really hungry, don't let me hold you back…" She silently prayed they weren't hungry. Luckily they seemed momentarily content with the meal she was eating.

Everything had been going well for almost an hour. Joy's mood was soaring, and the guys were getting along better than they had in centuries (mostly because they wanted Joy to have a worry-free evening). After dinner, Joy had insisted on helping with the dishes which enticed Spike to help as well. Then the three settled down on the couch in front of the television to be bored by the news. And that's when everything fell apart.

The news was telling of an escaped convict from almost a year ago, recently seen roaming the streets of Sunnydale. Angel and Spike were eager to change to the soccer game on the other station, but Joy had been infested with a horrid feeling in her gut about the rumors. The news gave no name for the escapee and Joy let the guys change the channel. Joy had started feeling sick though. Her head flooded with pain and her stomach twisted with ominous nausea. She screamed as her vision from the previous night returned, and expanded.

__

Dawn was walking through the streets of downtown Sunnydale, hand-in-hand with Colin. She was dressed for an evening date. The Dawn screamed and started running, urging Colin to keep up to her pace. Joy squeezed her eyes tighter, trying to stop the images. They were so terrible, but the wouldn't stop. _Dawn started gasping for breath but she continued sprinting until she had lost all sense of direction and found herself in the cemetery. She hadn't even noticed when she had lost hold of Colin, but she believed he was safe. Then she stopped. There was nowhere else to go. Her pursuers became visible. There was a group of ragged-looking vampires behind, at least five, but in front of her was someone much more shocking…_

Joy broke from the vision with a startled gasp. Angel and Spike were instantly at attention. She had unknowingly fallen off the couch. Spike helped her stand as she started muttering to herself.

"It couldn't be her…it's impossible…there's not way…" She was shaking her head and trembling violently as Spike held her comfortingly. Angel stood near by, not sure what to do. "I watched her die…I…" The sports game was suddenly interrupted by an important notice from the state police warning about the escaped prisoner. This time there was a picture. The guys frowned. Joy shook harder. "I killed her!"

Angel spoke with a deep voice of denial. "Faith…"

"You killed Faith? I mean the Scoobies had their suspicions, but it's pretty hard to believe. You killed her? Wait, then how's she not dead…" Spike rambled. Joy gasped when the truth hit her and broke free from Spike's arms. She fumbled with her purse in search of her cell phone and hurriedly dialed the Summers' house.

Buffy answered on the first ring. "Joy? Where are you? I've been so worried…"

Joy cut her off desperately. "Buffy, is Dawn there?"

"No, she went out…"

"Where, with who?" Joy demanded.

"Umm…she went on a date, with Colin." Buffy paused. "Where are you…" But Joy had already hung up. She grabbed her purse and ran from the apartment without even stopping to explain to the guys.

They waited for only a minute before running after her, but she had been faster, driven by urgent panic, and had already driven away when the guys reached the parking lot.

"Where do you think she's going?" Angel questioned absently, more to himself than to Spike.

"I don't know," Spike took it upon himself to answer anyway. "We're not goin' to let her go alone though, are we? We should follow her!"

"Of course we're going to follow her!" Angel agreed vehemently as though it was his idea in the first place. "Come on, we'll track her down." Angel started running, flying like a shadow through the night. Spike shook his head and ran after his grandsire.

Joy drove straight to the cemetery, praying that she made it there before Dawn arrived. She wanted to take care of the situation alone, without the pressure of having to protect Dawn. Unfortunately she wasn't quick enough, and as she pulled her car up to the entrance she could see Dawn already in the middle of the confrontation that Joy had seen in her vision. The young Summers' girl was standing only a short way away from the entrance with five hungry vampires grouped behind her and the very undead Faith standing in front of her.

Joy rushed from her car, not even bothering to close the door and hurried to Dawn's side, leaping over a short gravestone that was in her path. She reached her friend and stepped in front of her, facing Faith.

"Doesn't anyone stay dead anymore?" Joy asked in an attempt to remain light-hearted for Dawn's sake.

"You!" Faith exclaimed, obviously surprised. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I'd like to ask you the same question." Joy took a step forward. "Didn't I kill you?"

"Yea, so?" Faith shrugged casually. "Luckily I've got some loyal friends who thought I'd be better used, umm, not so dead." She laughed lightly. "I guess when you slit someone's throat you should make sure that they've completely stopped breathing before leaving them for dead." She smiled evilly. "Just for the future."

Joy smiled just as maliciously. "I'll remember that for the next time I kill you, which should be in, oh, a few seconds."

"Joy…" Dawn spoke softly, her voice held warning.

"Quiet Dawn. Stay behind me." Joy turned around to judge the position of the other vamps. They seemed a little confused as to who the new girl was and so for the meantime they were standing still, waiting for their leader's orders. Faith motioned for them to stay where they were so Joy returned her attention to the brunette.

"Joy, you don't understand…" Dawn tried to speak again.

"Yea, Joy, you don't understand!" Faith mimicked Dawn's desperately whiny voice. "Come on Dawnie, why don't you explain to miss-high-and-mighty here, why she should stay far away from me."

"Come on, you don't frighten me, bitch. I've killed you once, I can kill you again." Joy insisted.

"Is that a threat, shorty?" Faith came closer, showing the obvious differences in the two girls' heights. Faith was at least six inches taller, then again everyone was taller than Joy. "Come on then…are you waiting for an invitation? Let's fight!"

Before Joy even had a chance to attack Faith, the brunette lodged an expert jump-kick right at Joy's stomach. The short blonde doubled over, shocked at her own failure to defend herself. Dawn shrieked and hurried to Joy's side.

"Please Joy you don't understand! You can't fight Faith…" She pleaded for Joy to listen to her but the little slayer shook her away stubbornly.

"Stay back Dawn! You'll just get yourself hurt!" Joy demanded. Dawn sighed and stepped back again. Joy jumped to her feet and prepared herself for the next attack, but Faith waited.

"Whoa, your smell…" Faith's eyes widened. "Sorry, I'm still getting used to this whole vampire scent thing." She sniffed the air near Joy for a minute. "I smell you, I remember your smell, definitely, but there's someone else too, something else…it's sort of familiar." She paused. "It's a man, no, oh my god, you smell like a vampire. The scent's all over you! It's the mix of sweat and aftershave and _blood_!" She gasped. "You smell like…Angel!" Her eyes raised to a little above Joy's head.

"Faith." Angel's deep voice spoke from behind Joy. He seemed a little out of breath and Joy assumed he had run all the way from the apartment. He stepped closer to Joy, pushing Dawn farther back. "Joy, you don't want to get involved with her."

"Oh my god!" Faith repeated. "Wow, I'm a little surprised. I mean I know that you like you women, but really, even _you _could do better than the judge's miniature daughter."

"Excuse me?" Angel frowned.

"Come on, isn't she a bit young for you! She's not even out of high school!" She laughed. "Then again, I forget that you like them young. Young, blonde, and perky." She rolled her eyes. "Tell me Angel," Faith took a step closer to Angel and spoke with a pointed tone. "Be honest, between the slayer and this midget, who's better in bed…" Angel's strong hand immediately gripped Faith's neck. "Ooh, the protective vibe, that's hot." She punched Angel hard in the face, breaking free from Angel's grip.

"I'm not sleeping with Joy!" He growled.

"Whatever you say!" Faith backed up again to survey the odd group in front of her. "I don't get how the two of you hooked up though. I mean, she doesn't really seem like your type or anything. Don't you usually go for the slayer types?" She winked at Angel but then she noticed everyone's uncomfortable smiles. "Wait a minute?" Faith frowned. "You don't mean to tell me that the judge's girl's a slayer! Do you?"

Joy shrugged. "You're damn right."

"Hell no!" Faith exclaimed. "The midget slits my throat and the powers make her a slayer?"

"I guess they were rewarding me." Joy smiled wickedly.

Spike chose this moment to join the group and the conversation. Until that moment he had been hanging behind, making sure that the other vampires kept their calm and stayed out of mischief. "Well, well, I've got to say I'm a bit surprised." He stepped past Joy and Angel and circled Faith slowly, inspecting her curiously. "Sure, I've killed my share of vampire slayers but even I've never seen the sense in turning one of them."

"Wait, what?" Joy paused. "What the hell is that suppose to mean?" She glared at Spike for an explanation.

"Look, Joy, this isn't your problem. Get out of here." Angel warned. "You're better off not knowing. Trust me."

"No! I want to know what Spike's talking about." She insisted.

Faith shoved Spike away from herself and stepped towards Joy again. "Didn't you know that you were murdering a vampire slayer, baby doll?"

"What?" Joy gasped in disbelief. "No way. There's no way! You couldn't have been a slayer! You sent those vampires to kill my parents…"

"Well, there's reasons why B and I never got along." Faith laughed. "She was too…umm…good. And I wasn't."

Joy didn't find her explanation amusing. "I don't get it. I thought vampire slayers were suppose to be all about the good fight, you know ridding the world of evil and all that shit. How could she have been a slayer if she was 'evil'?"

"It's a long story Joy," Angel stated.

"I had a little bit too much fun killing…demons and humans. I guess you can understand that though, the rush of taking a human's life." Faith's eyes turned to dark, accusing slits. Joy shook her head furiously. "Oh yea you do. Don't try to cover it up. I could see it in your eyes when you killed me. You enjoyed every second of it! As the knife slit through my skin, bursting my veins and slowly steeling away my last breath. You reveled in the excitement as my blood flowed over your hands…"

Joy's temper snapped and she sent Faith flying backwards with a hard punch. "Don't think you know me! You don't know anything about me! You killed my parents. I was serving justice!"

Faith pushed herself to her feet and wiped a spot of blood away from her lip. "Justice? You don't know the meaning of the word. You were out for revenge! Revenge in cold blood."

Joy lunged for the ex-slayer again but Faith was quicker and as Joy's hands reached for Faith's neck, the brunette withdrew a dagger from her shoe and whisked it through the air, slicing through the flesh on Joy's chest. Bright red blood flowed freely, staining the shirt she was wearing instantly. The musky scent filled the night air and the group of hungry vampires began to grow restless.

"How's that for justice?" Faith sneered, stepping back as Joy's hand flew to her bleeding chest. She stumbled backwards in surprise pain. Spike instantly held out his arms to catch her and held her until she had regained her own control.

Joy gritted her teeth and wiped her blood covered hand on her shirt, threateningly approaching Faith. "I hope you realize that you're just asking for pain, bitch!"

"Oh, I hope so! It's no fun without it!" Faith retorted. Her green eyes almost seemed to sparkle with mischief as she let Joy continue towards her. She made a slight indication with her head to her lackey vampires and they eagerly started pursing from behind, instantly filling Angel and Spike's attention. Dawn tried to help with the fight but Joy quickly pulled her away.

"Get out of here Dawn." Joy insisted. "I don't want you anywhere near here. I need you at home. Now!" She let her voice raise in order to make Dawn understand how serious she was. Dawn hesitated for only a second before turning and fleeing from the cemetery, sprinting towards her home; with every intention of sending Buffy back to help.

While Angel and Spike fended off Faith's loyal group of vamp minions, Joy and Faith began a fierce battle, both equally eager to release their built-up hate for each other in a decent fight. The girls were equally matched in skill and motivation. Faith had the advantage of her slayer-vampire strength combined but Joy had the anger and desire that she needed to keep up with Faith's violence. Unfortunately, Joy's anger also served as a slight hindrance in her fighting and a few times Faith's ability to stay calm and logical managed to supercede Joy's reckless anger-fighting.

After only a few minutes, Faith realized that she could use Joy's anger against her and started baiting the young slayer for sloppy but fierce attempts of attack. "You should have heard the way your mom screamed when they killed her…" She taunted cruelly. Joy gritted her teeth tighter, unintentionally biting her lip and drawing blood. She lunged to attack Faith but her anger overwhelmed her and Faith easily slipped away from the attack. "And the way your old man begged for his life…" Again Joy lunged and once again Faith sidestepped her, managing to attack Joy from behind, punching her full-force in the lower back. Joy shrieked from the pain and jumped around to defend herself from Faith's next attempt. But Faith understood her advantage on the young slayer and continued her ruthless taunts. "I've never heard a grown man cry so pathetically, and hell knows I've killed my share." She smiled coldly as her first landed easily beneath Joy's jaw, causing more blood to flood Joy's mouth.

"My father was a good man!" Joy insisted, starting to struggle in her fight with Faith.

"Oh come on, you hated him!" Faith laughed. "I was watching your family for weeks before I made my move! I saw how much you detested your parents. You were probably grateful that I killed them off for you. Just two less problems for you to worry about…" Faith withdrew her knife again and slit Joy's thigh as she attempted a jump-kick. Joy fell to the ground in pain, grabbing at her leg to stop the bleeding. "You're as pathetic as your parents were!" Faith laughed again as she towered over the young slayer, dangerously lowering the knife towards her neck. "Time for _my _revenge now, bitch!" She was stopped, with expert timing, as Angel leapt over Joy and tackled Faith to the ground.

"I'm sorry that this happened to you Faith…" Angel admitted as he knocked the knife from her hand.

"You should be apologizing Angel! You were suppose to have helped me deal with my problems. I came to you in need and you offered me a place to stay." Faith frowned and rolled Angel off of her, pinning him to the ground briefly. "What sort of help is a home? You should have turned me then! I was dying from all my guilt. It was killing me! But, being a vampire…wow! I've definitely gotten past all that self-pity shit. You should've turned me when I came to you if you really wanted to help me." She laughed. Her laugh was starting to get redundant.

Angel sighed and easily threw the brunette off of himself, leaping onto her once again and grabbing a broken tree branch from the grass. "I'm sorry that I cared so much about you then." He raised the stick high. "And I'm sorry that I couldn't help you more." As he drove the stake through her heart he heard Buffy shouting his name from somewhere distant. Faith's body melted to dust and Angel was left kneeling in the grass, unable to think of move.

"Angel!" Buffy appeared at his side, desperation in her voice. "What did you do?"

"There was nothing we could have done to help her this time Buffy." He decided. "She would have done everything she could to kill us all." He turned his sensitive brown eyes up towards the slayer.

Buffy's blue eyes watered slightly and her voice shook. "Faith was…"

"Hopeless," Angel finished for her. "You know it's true and you know I did the only thing that any of us could have done. You would have done it yourself if you were in my place."

Buffy nodded slowly. "I know. It's just so weird. Faith was a slayer. We worked together…for a while…"

"And then she turned evil." Angel reminded the emotional young woman. "Don't let it get you down Buffy. You gave her too much of your life. There was nothing else you could have done for her." Buffy agreed with a soft murmur. It was silent for a minute and then Spike spoke.

"Umm, guys, Gidget doesn't look too good." Spike's steely eyes expressed his concern as he knelt beside Joy, half-cradling her in his lap.

Buffy seemed to notice the younger slayer for the first time and instantly dropped to the ground at her side. "Joy, sweetie, are you okay?" Her voice had automatically lost the authoritative tone she had been using with Angel and conformed to a caring, motherly tone as she inspected Joy's wounds. "What happened to her?" Buffy demanded anxiously, glaring at the two vampires. "You were suppose to be protecting her!"

"Hey now, she ran off from us!" Spike insisted. "We're bloody lucky we caught up to her in time…"

"Yea Buffy, she was determined to fight Faith no matter how we tried to stop her." Angel agreed. "You know how stubborn she can be."

Buffy sighed. "Joy, Faith wasn't your fight! You should have left her alone!"

"You don't understand Buffy." Joy whined. "Faith murdered my parents. I thought I had killed her last year and I've been living with the feeling of justified guilt ever since and now I find out that she's been living as a vampire! I had to take care of her myself…"

"You were in no condition…" Buffy started to lecture again but Joy cut her off bitterly.

"Stop telling me what I can handle!" Joy demanded. "I have survived for sixteen years just fine on my own and I am perfectly capable of knowing what I can and cannot handle! I wish everyone would stop treating me like a stupid child. I'm a slayer for God's sake and I want to be treated as such!" Joy had pushed herself up to a sitting position and was trying not to flinch at the pain that was stinging her chest.

Buffy pulled back a little at Joy's unexpected outburst. She nodded slowly. "You're right Joy." The guys stared at Buffy's admittance. "I've been babying you way too much. I've just never really had to take the responsibility of another slayer…"

"You don't have to take responsibility for me! I am so grateful that you have brought me into your home, but honestly, I can take care of myself! If you gave me a chance, you'd see that I'm actually sort of good at it." She was trying to soften her tone a little, realizing that Buffy just worried about her.

"I know." Buffy sighed. "Okay, I promise that from now on I'll try to leave you alone as much as you need. I don't want you to feel like I'm suffocating you. I just wanted you to know that you weren't on your own." She stood as though illustrating her plan to give Joy more space.

"Thank you Buffy," Joy smiled. "And I'll try to need you more." Buffy smiled back. "Now, umm, speaking of help…" she leaned back on her elbows, the pain starting to become slightly unbearable. "Can you help me, please!" She glanced up at Spike with hurting eyes. Spike instantly scooped her injured body up into his arms. Joy let her arms drape around his neck and her head drooped onto his shoulder.

"Come on, let's take her back to your place Buffy. It's closest."


	35. Chapter Thirty Five

Chapter Thirty-Five: Decisions

It took them only a few minutes to drive to Buffy's house and then Buffy led the way into the house with Spike carrying Joy close behind. Dawn and Willow were waiting in the living room nervously.

"Is she okay?" Dawn asked as Spike entered the house.

"Take her upstairs." Willow instructed without asking any questions. "She's staying in Buffy's room at the end of the hall."

Spike carried her quickly up the stairs and down the hallway into the bedroom, and then carefully laid her on the bed, propping her hurt leg up with a pillow. She moaned slightly at the movement but bit her lip and bared the pain bravely.

"How do you feel Joy?" Buffy was standing directly behind Spike, worriedly surveying the young slayer.

"Fine, just a little achy." Joy forced a smile. "I was stabbed twice after all. Plus I didn't even get to kill the bitch!"

Spike grinned. "She seems to be doin' fine."

"Will, could you get something to clean her up?" Buffy requested as the redhead hovered in the doorway anxiously. Willow left immediately and returned moments later with a few cleaning supplies.

"Do you want me to clean her up?" Willow offered. Buffy looked to Joy for her answer.

Joy shrugged. "Actually, I'd love some tea Willow. Spike can take care of my cuts."

Willow glanced at Buffy who nodded quickly and the witch left the room. Buffy stepped back to give Spike more space and waited for Joy to give her a command.

"Would you mind sending Angel up here, please?" Joy asked Buffy when she realized that the vampire was not in the room.

Buffy sighed but nodded obediently and went to fetch the requested man. Giving Joy her space was going to be difficult but Buffy was determined to make it work.

When they had been left alone Joy began to reveal her true suffering. Her breathing had been painful and now she drew in long jagged breaths, pressing her hand to her chest, feeling the sticky blood that was slowly drying and caking to her skin. She whimpered as she adjusted the position of her leg, feeling as though a thousand blades were still sticking into her thigh.

"Joy, luv, are you alright?" Spike took a glass of water from the nightstand and dipped a hand towel into it. "Talk to me please. Don't be stubborn right now." He moved her hand away from her chest and replaced it with the damp towel. He had to maneuver around the small slit in the shirt in order to fully clean the cut.

Joy shivered as the water touched her chest and inhaled deeply at the stinging pain. "It hurts." She confessed simply.

"Yea, I kind of got that impression." Spike grinned and brushed a strand of hair away from her face.

Angel joined them in the room and automatically came to Joy's other side. "Feeling any better?" Joy shook her head slowly. "What can I do for you?"

"You've already done more than enough." Joy told him. "You two always seem to be there for me when I need you. I'm sorry I just ran off like I did, but I was scared, for Dawn…"

"It's okay, we understand." Angel assured her.

"You really are incredible though you guys." She smiled. "Both of you." The guys beamed from the compliment. "I always feel safe when I'm with either of you. I know you're always watching after me."

"Joy, you mean a lot to me." Angel told her. "Sort of like a baby sister. I would do anything for you." He realized how awkward it was confessing his care for Joy in front of Spike and quickly dropped the subject.

Spike seemed to feel the need to compete. "Yea, me too. Or well, something like that at least…maybe not exactly a sister…" He blushed slightly and turned his focus to the towel in his hand.

Joy smiled at Spike's embarrassment. "You guys are the best." Another pain shot through her leg and she trembled again.

"We need to disinfect your cuts Joy, they could be dangerous." Angel decided, leaning over her leg to inspect it. Spike handed Angel the disinfector that Willow had brought up. "It would be easier if these pants weren't in the way." He thought out loud. "Would you mind if I tear the pant leg enough for me to see clearly?"

Joy shrugged. "They're your pants." He grinned. "Here…" She reached her hand underneath the pillow behind her head and withdrew a small knife. "Use this."

Spike and Angel frowned. "You sleep with that under your pillow?" Spike questioned. "Isn't that a bit dangerous?"

Joy smiled. "Probably. But I'm a pretty relaxed sleeper. I don't move very much." She realized how strange it probably seemed. "Umm, it's a habit, for protection…never mind."

Angel shook his head and took the knife, easily cutting off the pant leg to her upper thigh, giving himself enough access to the wound. He handed her the knife and she returned it to its place beneath her pillow. He took a towel from Spike and pressed it to the wound on Joy's leg. She flinched slightly as the cool, damp cloth touched her leg.

"Did I hurt you?" He asked with immediate concern.

"No," Joy assured him. "It just stings a little."

"Okay, let me know if it hurts." Angel took the disinfector from Spike and dripped it onto her wound. She squeezed her eyes shut as it burned.

Spike suddenly stopped his cleaning process on her chest wound and pulled back slightly.

"What's the matter Spike?" Joy asked, instantly noticing the change in his behavior.

"Uh, nothing." Spike stuttered. "Nothing at all…" He took a couple of steps back towards the door. "I'll be back in a minute." And he left the bedroom.

Buffy was waiting in the hallway and instantly recognized the savage gaze in Spike's hungry eyes. She led him away from the doorway and spoke quietly so Joy wouldn't hear. "There's blood in the fridge. Help yourself."

"Thanks." Spike mumbled and hurried down the stairs, eager to eat.

After Spike had left them Joy turned to Angel for an explanation. "Did I do something wrong?"

"Okay, I need to explain something to you that may not be very easy for you to hear or to understand." Angel decided, as he continued to bandage her wound. "Spike cares about you. He cares about you a lot, actually, a little more than I would like him to." Joy seemed ready to interrupt but Angel quickly shushed her. "Let me talk without your questions or comments, okay? I need to get this out before I think better of it." Joy shut her mouth in response. "Anyway, the reason that I don't think Spike should care about you so much, is because he _is _a vampire. That will never change. It's just who or what he is. See, I'm a vampire too, but I have a soul. Which means I understand the evilness of a vampire's actions. Spike, however, does not understand that. He is controlled by a chip that the government stuck into his brain. Without that chip he'd be just like any other blood-thirsty vampire." Angel could tell that it was hard for Joy to be listening to his explanation but he continued with determination. "Even though he tries to ignore his vampire instinct and to fit in with the Scoobies, he can't. It's just not possible for him. His thirst for blood is a part of him. It runs deep in his veins. It's more than a desire or a need it is a deep innate craving for life. Do you understand that? He needs blood to live."

"I know…" Joy said simply.

"I know you know, but do you understand that Spike has that craving all the time. It never leaves him. Even when he's with you acting perfectly normal and sweet and human…he's still feeling that inhuman lust for the devouring of a human's life…" He paused. "I have it too, but unlike Spike, I have learned to control it and to almost ignore it."

"Why are you telling me this?" Joy asked emotionally. She didn't like hearing about the vampire nature of her two best friends.

"Because you need to hear it, Joy. You need to understand what sort of animal you are letting into your life…"

"Wait, what? I'm not letting anybody into my life…"

"Joy, I can read you better than you think. I know that Spike cares about you and I also realize that you care about him, more than you will probably ever admit to yourself. To you, I am your best friend, like a brother, but Spike…it's not the same with him, is it? He's more than just a friend or a brother. And I know that you feel it when you're with him." Angel finished with her leg and continued the wound that Spike had been fixing.

"I don't know how I feel about Spike." Joy confessed. "I don't think I like him like that, but you're right, I guess. I do care about him. He means a lot to me. He's done a lot for me. And that's not something that I'm likely to forget anytime soon."

"I'm not trying to make you forget your gratitude towards Spike. I just want to be sure that you're aware of what you're opening yourself up to." Angel told her comfortingly.

"I appreciate your concern, Angel." Joy looped her hand around Angel's neck and pulled his face close and kissed his cheek caringly. "You're an incredible friend to me."

"Well, it's hard work always having to look after you, but I guess you make it worth it." He joked.

"Anyway, about your little informative lecture…what's your advice on my friendship with Spike. Are you telling me not to let him into me life? Not to trust him?"

"No. I want to tell you that you can trust Spike. In the past year he's proven his worth in many battles with the Scoobies, but I'm just afraid that if anything ever happened to the chip in his head…well…before he had that he was the worst sort of vampire and that could be dangerous to you." He held her hand caringly. "I don't want to see you get hurt. That's all that I'm trying to say. Just protect yourself."

"I will."

"Promise me." Angel demanded.

"I promise," Joy smiled, trying to convince Angel of her seriousness.

"Okay." Angel kissed her forehead. "I think you're all good now." He wandered over to the still unpacked suitcase lying on the floor and started searching through her clothes for something more comfortable and clean for her to wear. "Now, try and stay out of life-threatening situations Slayer." Angel grinned at her teasingly.

"Well, I'll do my best, but my boss might get a little upset if I start ditching all my shifts." Joy sat up slowly and tried not to flinch at the sting in her chest and leg. It wasn't as painful as before and it would probably be mostly healed by the next day, but it was still just a little sore.

"Joy, are you all cleaned up?" Buffy peeked her head into the bedroom and Joy smiled at her from the bed.

"Come on in Buffy. Angel's failing miserably at finding me something to wear." She laughed. "Do you think you could help him?"

Buffy grinned and pushed Angel away from the suitcase, trying to ignore how sweet he was being in his constant care for Joy. She didn't need that sort of confusion in her life right now. As far as she was concerned, Angel was simply Joy's friend who had no connection whatsoever to Buffy's own past.

"I'll leave you girls alone while you change Joy," Angel decided. "I'll wait downstairs."

"He's a good person." Joy commented mostly to herself.

"Yes he is." Buffy sighed. "So is Spike, usually." She grinned. "They both seem to care a lot about you."

"I know." Joy nodded. "Where is Spike?" She let Buffy help her stand and change into a pair of her own sweatpants and a tank top.

"He's in the kitchen…eating." Buffy told her.

"Oh," Joy sighed. "I need to go talk to him for a minute, do you think you could give us a minute alone. And then I'll come talk to you and Giles, I promise."

Buffy seemed anxious to question Joy but nodded politely and walked with her down the stairs until Joy reached the kitchen and then she left her alone and went to wait in the living room.

Joy entered the kitchen slowly, surprised at how little her leg hurt as she walked. Spike was standing over the kitchen sink guzzling down a mug of what Joy assumed to be blood. She cleared her throat to let him know she was there. He turned to her and she gasped softly at his changed face. She had never seen Spike's vampire face and the difference was a little shocking. But she did her best to mask her surprise.

"Umm, I talked to Angel, after you left." Joy started slowly.

"Yea, what'd you talk about?" Spike looked away from her for a minute and when he looked back his face was normal again.

"About you." Joy stated simply.

"Oh," Spike hung his head. "He told you to watch out for me, huh? To protect yourself, to bloody stay away from me!"

"Something like that." Joy shook her head. "He just warned me to be careful, and I…"

"Told him you could handle yourself?" Spike tried to guess her thoughts.

"No, I promised him I'd be careful. I don't think it's a secret that I don't entirely trust you, but for that matter, I'm not sure I entirely trust Angel either. But at the same time, I know that you care about me, and that means a lot, and I'm not just going to ignore that because you might not be completely trustworthy."

"Well, that's very good of you." He sighed. "I can't change what I am Joy."

"I'm not asking you to."

"Then, you're okay with what I am?" Spike asked hopefully.

"Until you give me a reason not to be." Joy smiled. "Come on, the Scoobies want to interrogate me. It should be loads of fun." She headed out of the kitchen and Spike followed instantly. Everyone was gathered in the living room, including Dawn who was sitting on a chair in the corner of the room, still looking very shaken up. Dawn sat next to her and took her hand comfortingly. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you all the whole truth about my vision." Joy started the conversation.

"Why didn't you?" Buffy demanded.

"I thought I would be protecting you all from unnecessary stress and pain. I knew that I could take care of it myself…well at least I thought I could. Thank you for saving my life by the way Buffy." Joy forced a grateful smile towards the older slayer.

"I assume you did not realize that Faith was a slayer when you killed her…" Giles thought out loud.

Joy shook her head. "I just assumed she was some wild murderer who realized that vampires worked for money." She sighed, "I guess I never really took the appropriate time to analyze the situation. I was a little bit crazy when I went after her. Hell bent on revenge, I guess you could say…"

Spike grinned slightly as he pictured the fiery aggression that he knew the young slayer could possess if the occasion called for it.

"You shouldn't have tried to do it yourself, Joy. I am always ready to help you in any situation, no matter what!" Buffy half scolded and half encouraged.

"I know that, I knew that before too, sometimes I can just be very determined…"

"You mean stubborn." Angel grinned.

"Okay, fair enough." Joy shrugged. "I'll try to be more honest next time I have a head-splitting vision that predicts my best friend's death." She sighed. "I don't understand why I had a vision, or why it hurts so bad…"

Giles cleared his throat. "We are going to help you figure this out. The council has agreed to bring you to England so that you can work with their seers there and hopefully you will learn to control your visions as well as understand where they come from."

"The council, in England? Hmm…that could be interesting, or scary…" Joy shrugged. "When do I leave?"

"Tomorrow morning. The council will have a private jet ready at five o'clock, just before sunrise." He glanced around the room. "Angel will be accompanying you."

Joy's eyes brightened. "I don't have to go alone?"

"That is of course, if Angel does not mind." Giles realized that he had not yet asked the vampire.

Angel quickly nodded. "Of course! I would never let Joy go all the way to Europe alone." He grinned at the young girl. "I sort of feel like her watcher, in a way."

Joy nodded. "You sort of are my watcher!" She glanced at Giles apologetically. "He did train me you know!"

Giles nodded. "I am aware of your companionship with Angel and that is why I arranged for him to join you in England. Trust me, the council was not exactly thrilled at the prospect of having a vampire join them."

Joy smiled. "Did you explain to them that he's a good vampire?" Angel beamed at the compliment, which was very high coming from Joy.

"Don't worry, the council is very familiar with what Angel is." Giles assured her.

"You say that like it's a bad thing." Angel frowned.

Joy grinned. "We'll prove that you're good, okay? I guess I better go and pack."


	36. Chapter Thirty Six

_**In case any of you don't notice when you read this new chapter...I added another chapter before this one as well, but I added them at the same time so you might have missed that! I just wanted to make sure that you read them both to understand this one...**_

_A/N: Okay, I think this is definitely the longest chapter I've ever written, but I think it covers a lot! So enjoy! And please continue to review. I'm not going to stop this story if I don't keep getting reviews, mainly because I'm so interested in writing it and I have a lot of ideas for the upcoming chapters, so I don't think it's possible for me to get bored with it. But it's always encouraging to hear from my readers who are enjoying it! Thanks! Kisses to all! Nat_

Chapter Thirty-Six: The Council

"Welcome to England, Miss Peters," a gray-haired man with tiny spectacles resting on his nose and dressed even more tidy than Giles, greeted Joy and Angel the next night as their private plane finally landed. His stuffy manner was plainly evident, not only by his lack-of-smile greeting but by his complete ignorance of Angel's presence. Joy had expected for the council to be apprehensive about her vampire guardian but she had hoped they would at least be civil. Angel hardly seemed phased by their coldness.

"And…" Joy pressed. She couldn't let it pass as easily.

"And Angel, we welcome you as well." The man forced out through seemingly gritted teeth.

"Thank you, I'm glad to be here." Angel replied with a sarcastic grin. He stood close to Joy protectively and nodded to the council man to lead them on. He nodded curtly and led them into an enormous ancient building that almost resembled a sort of castle. There was a young, neatly dressed woman standing in the well-lighted entryway waiting to greet them as they entered.

"This is Lydia, she will show you to your rooms." The man dismissed himself and disappeared down a long corridor to the left of the foyer.

Lydia nodded formally. "Welcome, please follow me." She started walking up an elegant marble staircase. "I hope you're flight here was satisfying."

"Satisfying?" Joy started to grin at her British accent and word choice but decided to stay polite, even if she was a little sarcastic. "Yes, thank you. It was perfectly satisfying."

Lydia walked briskly down a long hall lit by chandeliers until she reached a doorway. "Mr. Angel, this is where you will be staying." She opened the door into an ornately decorated suite.

"What, no dungeon? Chains?" He joked, glancing around the huge room.

She ignored his attempt at humor. "The refrigerator over there contains an adequate supply of blood for you."

"Thank you." Angel dropped his joking demeanor, deciding that he should probably try and make a good impression on all these fancy British folks, since they seemed to be sort of in charge of the whole Slayer operation. Then again, he had orders from the Powers so who else should he need to impress?

"Miss Peters, if you would please follow me, your room is at the end of the hall." Lydia continued to walk and Joy tugged at Angel's jacket sleeve to make him come with her. She was feeling a little overwhelmed by the enormity of the council's boarding house and wasn't quite ready for the challenge of facing any of them alone. He followed her obligingly.

At the end of the hall Lydia opened the door to Joy's spacious suite. It was even larger than Angel's and decorated with even more elaborate furniture.

"Tomorrow morning someone will meet you here, at your room to show you the way to the dining hall and explain to you all that you will be doing while staying with us. I hope you find your room comfortable." Lydia waited as Joy wandered into the suit and took in all its splendor.

She stopped short at the king size bed. It was absolutely beautiful, a golden framed canopy with deep scarlet velvet blanketing, but in three places above the headboard and fixed at each corner of the bed frame itself, were rather noticeable crosses.

"Is that really necessary?" Joy frowned, pointing at the crucifixes. Angel raised his eyebrows.

"Well, we can never be too safe, of course. Especially with the American slayers. We have been well informed of Miss Summers's past relationships, especially the one with yourself Mr. Angel, as well as the consequences that followed." Lydia announced bluntly. "While you are staying here with the council, we must ask that you refrain from any form of romance with one another and…"

"Excuse me!" Angel cut in quickly. "What exactly are you implying? Joy and I are not in any sort of romantic relationship and we have never…well…frankly, my past with Buffy is none of your damn business!"

"No shit." Joy agreed.

"Pardon my assumptions." Lydia did not seem at all as apologetic as she claimed. "Rest well." She turned and walked briskly down the hallway, briefly glancing back over her shoulder as though checking to see if Angel had left Joy's room yet. When Joy glared back at her Lydia continued without looking back again.

Laughing at the council members' foolish conceit, Joy shut her bedroom door and started prying the crosses away from the bed.

"They're every bit as slimy as Buffy described." Joy sighed. "Just give me a second and I'll have these crosses destroyed." She continued ripping the metal fixtures off of the wall and frame.

"Don't worry about it Joy, I expected as much from the council." Angel sighed. "Well, I should probably let you get your sleep. Who knows what sort of training they're going to be putting you through tomorrow."

"You're probably right." Joy yawned unintentionally. "Will I see you in the morning?"

"It depends on what sort of sun protection this place has got." Angel shrugged.

"Right, I didn't think about that."

"Goodnight." Angel left the bedroom and headed back to his own suit, leaving Joy alone to try and sleep.

The next morning She was awoken with less sleep than she ever imagined possible. It was one of those nights where she felt as though she had just closed her eyes, but this night she really had just closed her eyes when a loud knock on the door was waking her up again.

"Just a minute," Joy called groggily, rolling out of bed and tripping her way over to the door. She opened the door with squinted eyes. "What?"

"Miss Peters, I am Martha and I have come to tell you it is time for breakfast." An older woman who was dressed very crisply.

"No it's not. I haven't even slept yet." Joy wanted to close the door. "Come back later."

"I am sorry, but you must start your day now, even though you are not yet at the same time as we are. You will soon adjust to England's time." Martha shook her head. "Dress yourself quickly and then come out in the hall. I will be waiting."

Joy, still half-asleep, closed the door and made her way back to the closet where someone had already hung up all her clothing from the suitcases. She dressed in comfortable sweatpants and a tight tank top that would easy for her to move in, no matter what sort of training the council put her through.

"Alright, I guess I'm as ready as I'll ever be at this freakishly early hour." Joy reluctantly followed the woman down the hall. "What about Angel?" She asked as they passed his room.

"Mr. Angel has been informed of all the areas he may traverse in protection from the sunlight. You will undoubtedly see him this evening." Martha informed the slayer.

"Okay," Joy followed Martha down the hallway and down a different set of stairs than the ones that Joy had been led up the night before. At the bottom of the long staircase they turned left down a bright and wide-open corridor, lit purely by the natural sunlight flooding in through the wall-covering windows.

"After you have eaten, you will meet with Marcus Brown. He will be your personal watcher while you are here. If you have any questions or any difficulties during your training, you will converse with him." Martha informed Joy as she led the young girl into the dining room and pointed her towards the chair at the head of the long table. Nobody else joined her. "Eat well. Your training will be long and no doubt strenuous, requiring plenty of nutrition." She turned on her tall heeled shoe and left the room.

"Thanks. Good morning. Hope you have a great day…" Joy muttered to herself as she started digging into her immense collection of breakfasts foods, including plenty of scones and hot tea. Joy ate until she couldn't drink another sip of tea.

As soon as she put down her fork a young man stepped into the room. It was as though he had been watching her, just waiting for her to finish eating.

"Good day Miss Peters, I hope you slept well." The man who Joy assumed to be Marcus Brown seemed very young for a watcher, probably not much older than Buffy and her friends. He was dressed every bit as old and British as Giles though, in a perfectly pressed dark tweed suit with a white collared shirt and a dark brown tie with a tan sweater vest showing beneath the buttoned jacket.

"Thank you but no. I didn't really sleep at all." Joy shrugged. "So what's the plan, teacher?" She grinned as sweetly as a kindergartener, even though it was entirely sarcastic.

"Umm, yes, I suppose you were a bit off with the time difference." Marcus nervously ran his fingers through his short dark blonde hair. "I am sorry, I shall try not to work you too hard today." He seemed kind but much to timid and obedient for Joy's taste.

"Thanks bunches." Joy sighed and stood. "What's first?"

"If you please follow me," Marcus led her down yet another corridor and down more stairs to the lower half of the building where a professional looking training room was set up. It was incredible and had everything that Joy could ever imagine wanting for her own workouts. "First, the council would like for me to put you through a trial of tests."

"Tests?" Joy frowned.

"Of a sort. Everything that you would be required to do should be perfectly natural for a slayer, of course." Marcus assured her. Joy nodded her consent. Not that she would really have a choice though. "After you have completed all of the tests required of you, I shall explain the next party of your time here with the council."

The tests however took much longer than Joy anticipated and for the next few days she was made to suffer through a series of complicated routines that tested not only her physical defense capabilities but also her mental state, her emotional approach to fighting, and each and every one of her senses. It was a long process and very tiring, and most of the time Joy didn't even realize what she was capable of until she had completed the session. But, Marcus claimed that she succeeded brilliantly in all the tests that he put her through and on the fifth day she would finally be able to move on to the next part.

During her week of tests, Joy had not seen Angel once. She blamed the fact that Marcus stuck to a very strict routine and she was not allowed to return to her room until very late and by that time she was so exhausted that she did not think about visiting with Angel. On the fifth night though, they finished a little earlier than usual and Joy instantly went to Angel's room hoping that he would be there.

"Angel?" She knocked softly, not sure who she could wake up in that particular corridor, since it was so late already.

It took him a couple minutes but he eventually opened the door. "Joy!" His face lit up when he saw her. "What have you been up to this week? I haven't seen you at all."

"My new watcher has kept me very busy! He's been having me do all sorts of tests. I'm not really sure why, I guess to make sure that I'm actually capable of being a slayer." She shrugged with a grin. "Can I come in?"

"Of course." Angel stepped back and let her enter the room. "So, you have a new watcher?"

"Don't worry, he's nowhere near as good as you!"

"Of course he's not!" Angel grinned. "I'm the best there is! But still, is he nice? Does he treat you well?" Angel pulled a chair out from the desk and sat down while Joy jumped onto the bed. "Because, you know, if he treats you badly at all, I can take care of him for you…"

"Thank you Angel, I know you are always willing to beat someone up for my sake," Joy smiled mischievously. "But I don't think that'll be necessary with Marcus. He's actually really nice. A little uptight, but nice nonetheless."

"He better be."

"So, what have you been up to?"

"Nothing much." Angel shrugged. "I was shown to a room where I could practice my tai-chi without any sunlight to kill me and so I've been spending most of my time there." He sighed and Joy could tell that he had actually been quite bored for the past few days.

"I'm sorry that you were dragged into this Angel," Joy apologized sincerely. "I was so excited about not having to come to England all by myself that I didn't even think about how it would effect you." She fiddled with the rings on her fingers. "If you want to go home, I totally understand. I'll be fine here on my own, really. I can handle it."

Angel frowned. "Joy, nobody can handle the council on their own without some sort of nervous breakdown. I'm not mean enough to put you through that, so I guess you're sort of stuck with me."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I don't want you to ask me again." Angel told her determinely.

"Okay, fine. It's your decision." Joy gave in with a smile. She was very glad that Angel seemed okay with staying with her, even if he was completely bored. She realized that he would put up with anything for her. "I guess I should get to bed. Marcus has been working me like crazy and I have no idea what tomorrow's going to include, so I need to get as much rest as possible."

"Alright, sleep well. Maybe I'll see you tomorrow." Angel walked her back to the door and watched her walk down the hallway until she was safely inside her own bedroom.

"So, you're all witches?" Joy had just been introduced to a group of women who Marcus called "seers".

The women seemed slightly uncomfortable with that label, maybe even a little offended.

"Umm, no, actually, well in a way perhaps…" Marcus struggled to explain. "While most witches' powers come from practice and learning, the seers' powers are more innate. The gift of seeing events of the future is something that most people have to be born with. It is a gift from the goddesses, the servants to the Powers that Be." Everything Marcus said sounded liked a foreign language to Joy. She was completely confused.

"Umm…goddesses?"

"Yes, goddesses are very powerful women. At one time every goddess was a powerful witch who lived in the world, fighting alongside slayers against the forces of evil, but when the life of a goddess on earth ended, they retired to their positions as guardians of other earthly humans who possessed any sort of magical powers." Marcus was crunching the explanation in a hurry, trying to make Joy understand the best that he was capable. "There are very few goddesses left on earth, and there are actually very few existing in higher realms as well. Those that are there of course, are in direct contact with the Powers to ensure that their will is carried out…"

"Yea, you totally lost me." Joy sighed. "What do the seers have to do with the goddesses?"

"The goddesses bless seers with the gift of sight in order to protect slayers and witches more completely then the goddesses can do from their position as guardian. Goddesses are mostly just watchers from the heavens. They can not have direct contact with humans." Marcus finished. "Your unusual vision has given the council reason to believe that you are somehow gifted with the sight, which does not happen unless you have been chosen by the Powers or are a direct descendent from a goddess. Which is, of course, extremely rare. In fact, I am not certain that I have ever heard of a child of a goddess for over a hundred years."

"Well, that sounded like a lot of gibberish to me. What is it that you want the seers to do to me?" Joy questioned.

"They are going to attempt to make you reach within yourself to discover if you do have the gift…"

"Right…a bunch of hocus pocus and some meditating. I can do that." Joy smiled. "Where do I start?"

"This is Eline. She is sort of the leader of all of our seers here, and she will be helping you along with your seeing development. Of course, you may always talk with me if you ever wish." Marcus motioned a woman forward.

"It is nice to finally meet you, Miss Peters, I have been hearing much of you." Eline's dark red lips curled up elegantly. "I will greatly enjoy working with you."

"Thank you," Joy was in awe by the woman's striking natural beauty. She looked like a queen from a fantasy movie. Her skin was pearly white and looked almost shimmery. Her thick, long hair, braided into a plait down her back was the color of coal but it was silky and shiny. "But since we're going to be working together, you absolutely have to call me Joy."

Eline nodded. "Of course, I will call you whatever you like Joy. Please, let me introduce you to the others." Her eyes shone glimmered almost silver as she smiled at Joy and led her to the other witches, or seers, who were all sitting on cushions on the floor of an outdoor large gazebo type room. There were lit candles scattered around and some hanging in lanterns from the ceiling. Most of the women looked much normal in their beauty then Eline, but all were still stunning, mostly due to their kind eyes and genuine smiles as they silently welcomed Joy to their group. Eline started introducing the five women as she moved around the group pointing them out. "This is Sherie, Maxine, Rose, Dorah, and Natasha."

"Hey girls." Joy greeted. They were all girls. Well, women, but still young. No older than twenty-seven, probably, though Eline seemed a bit older then the rest, which was probably why she was in charge.

"Our seers come form many different places to study and learn to control their powers, just as you have come to us." Eline explained. "When they have learned all that we can teach them, they return to where they came from and use their powers to help others."

"Cool. Sounds like a party." Joy was trying hard to drop her sarcasm but she was still a little uncomfortable around all the strange magical people that she was meeting. "So, what are you going to do with me?"

"First, we would like to try and discover what the source of your visions are. Why you get them, what triggers them." Eline explained.

"Well, I've only had one vision so far, well two but they were sort of the same, but still, how do you even know that I'm going to have another vision?" Joy argued.

"I suppose that is what we are going to try and figure out." Eline motioned for Joy to take a seat on a cushion in the middle of the circluar room, so she would be surrounded by all the other seers. "Have you ever meditated before, Joy?"

"No, not really." Joy frowned. She was feeling a little bit worried about what sort of test they were going to put her through.

"Alright, well we need for you to meditate, in a way…" Eline sat next to her. "You need to take yourself into a deep place of silence, of peace. Your mind has to be at absolute rest with nothing able to disturb it's quiet concentration. Close your eyes. When you reach that place we will begin to prod you with questions or tests that you may not remember afterwards, but if you receive another vision, it will help us." Eline moved back so that Joy had a large empty circumfrence around herself. "Are you ready?"

Joy nodded and closed her eyes, with her legs crossed beneath her and her hands resting gently on her knees. "Let's do this." She started breathing in and out slowly then she stopped. "Wait, how do I reach my 'calm'?" She opened one eye curiously.

"Just focus. Clear your mind of your surroundings and anything that is pressing on your mind." Eline spoke in a soft voice. "Breathe and release your tension. Reach within your soul and find yourself."

Joy did as she was told. It was a lot harder then she made it sound though. First she had trouble forgetting about all the women that were gathered around her, inevitably staring at her. Watching her movements, her reactions, expressions, trying to read her emotions and see into her life. But after about ten minutes she had managed to stretch past her immediate surroundings and moved to her memories of the past week that she'd been in England. Then she forced herself to forget about her life and try to just feel, to sense, not to think. And then her mind finally emptied. Her mind turned white as though all her thoughts had been erased.

Soft indefinable whispers started fluttering across her blank mind and then images started flickering choppily into her consciousness. It was hard to understand them. Nothing seemed to make any sense, the people were unrecognizable and the voices were hard to hear. More whispers flooded her ears and more images crowded in.

"What is it honey? Who's there?" It was a woman's voice. It was sort of familiar, but still a little hard to hear completely.

"Sure, come on in to my office…" A man's voice responded. Joy whinced slightly as a sudden commotion burst out. It seemed to be fighting, but she couldn't figure out exactly what was happening. But there was definite struggling, yelling, cries of pain and shouts for help. Then their faces were there. It was them. It was her parents. They weren't dead, but…they were struggling against vampires. Joy was witnessing the night they died. She could see her mom. A vampire had thrown her to the ground and she was crying hysterically as the vampire started to feed on her.

"No! Please! Joy…" She had called out for her. Joy could hear her mother calling out for her. But she wasn't calling out to her, she was just calling out in agony. _"Joy! She'll never know the truth…she has to know…her mother wanted her to know…"_

She had called out for her. Joy could hear her mother calling out for her. But she wasn't calling out to her, she was just calling out in agony. 

Joy snapped out of her blank state of mind in an instant. She came back to reality sweating and with short breaths. The women around her were staring at her with wide eyes.

"What happened?" Eline questioned calmly.

"I had a vision." Joy gasped. "But it wasn't of the future." She trembled from head to foot. "I saw my parents dying and my mom…" She shook her head. "What did you do to me?"

"We did nothing that you were not capable of yourself." One of the women replied calmly. Joy couldn't remember her name, they were all the same to her at the moment.

"I don't want to see my parents die again!" She stood quickly and started walking away from the room of witches. "Stay the hell away from my mind!"

"Joy, we weren't in your mind." Eline tried to calm her down and to bring her back inside the circle. "We just helped you achieve the calm that you needed to see inside of your own mind and reach into your powers. Joy, you are a gifted young woman. To be able to see the past as well as the future is very unusual." Joy slowly allowed to be dragged back into the circle of witches but she remained standing.

"Can't you all see the past?" Joy asked the women.

They didn't even think about the answer before responding with a firm united 'no'. Joy didn't know what to say. She hadn't expected to have powers that none of the powerful witches of the council had. She slowly sat down.

"What do my visions mean?" Joy asked slowly. "I mean…my mom…she said something about me not…" She snapped her mouth shut suddenly. "Never mind. It doesn't matter." She shook her head, deciding that she wanted to keep her visions to herself for the time being. "I'm really tired. Do you think I can stop for today and come back tomorrow? I promise I'll be back early."

Eline nodded. "Of course Joy. It's very important for you to get your rest. We'll see you tomorrow."

Joy hurried away from the group of seers and ran all the way up to her room. She didn't stop to see Angel, she felt a strong need to be alone. To sleep or just to rest in silence. She had to be alone.

The next morning Joy witnessed the sun rising outside her wide window. She hadn't closed her eyes all night. She had spent most of the night working herself out until she was too exhausted to managed another sit-up. Then she had gathered multiple candles that had been placed throughout her room and arranged them in a circle around herself. She ran through the calming measures that the seers had taught her that day until her mind had become clear again. She wanted to see more. She wanted to go back to her parents death and find out what her mother had been talking about before the vision had disappeared. She had to know.

She had sat still with a completely empty mind for almost two hours and still nothing more about her parents had come to her. Finally Joy gave up and returned to working herself out, as though the physical aspect could somehow calm her down more then meditating managed to. However, even after another hour and a half of working-out, Joy didn't feel any less calm.

At the first signs of sunrise, Joy had dressed and hurried down to the kitchen, which she had wandered across a couple of days ago when she had escaped for a few minutes from Marcus after training one day. She grabbed herself a collection of random food for breakfast and then ran outside to where she had left the seers the day before. She didn't expect them to be grouped already, but she had hoped that maybe the atmosphere would help her receive the vision that her room wouldn't give her.

She carefully lit the multiple candles and the trays of insence. She sat down in the center of the gazebo with her legs crossed beneath her and her hands resting gently on her knees. Taking deep breaths, she started the process of clearing her thoughts, surprised at how easy it was for her after only a couple of tries.

Even with almost a half hour of silent and peaceful contemplation, Joy could not receive anymore visions revealing more about her parents' death or anything else for that matter.

"This is ridiculous." Joy muttered out loud when her frustrations finally outweighed her attempt at steady patience.

"It is impossible for anyone to gain perfection at the skill of the sight in only one day, Joy." Eline smiled knowingly from the doorway. "If you are able to believe in yourself, I can help you develop your skill further, and teach you the patience you need in order to receive visions as well as the strength you need to endure them."

Joy took a deep breath and then nodded slowly. "I'm willing to try. For some reason I'm seeing things in my head that I don't exactly like, and I'd like to figure out why, or at least how to make them go away when I don't want them…"

"Joy, I'm not sure I can tell you how to make them go away, but I can try and teach you to control them so the pain isn't as serious…" Eline started to explain.

"How do you know about the pain?" Joy asked with raised eyebrows.

"I can tell, the way that you have talked about them and also yesterday when you received your vision, I could see it in your face. The pain is excruciating to you, isn't it? So unbearable that even during the vision all you can think about is getting rid of it. The pain poisons your brain so you can not think straight." Eline was explaining what Joy experienced during her visions perfectly. She didn't even have to answer for Eline to realize that she was right. "Joy, the danger of the pain is that you might not realize what your vision is trying to tell you. You have to learn to control the pain, to ignore it, and to make the vision the priority, or furthermore, the only concern."

"Okay." Joy agreed quietly. "I'm willing to learn all that you can teach me."

"Good, we'll start right away." Eline ran a small bell that she had been holding behind her back and instantly the rest of the seers joined them.

The four weeks that Joy spent with the council passed faster then any since she had first learned of her destiny as the Slayer. She had spent every day studying with the Seers, practicing the quickest ways to reach her calm and how best to ignore the pain that seared into her brain every time she managed to catch a glimpse of a vision in her mind. She had yet to invoke a full vision but a few brief sights had been thrust upon her randomly throughout her days of training with the seers as well as with Marcus, who had not allowed her to abandon all of her slayer training, even though she spent most of her day working on her gift of the sight.

"Marcus, there's something that I've been wanting to ask you, well for a while. Ever since I came here really…" Joy hesitated one afternoon as she stretched out on the vast front lawn.

"Go ahead and ask Joy, you should never have to hold back with me." Marcus altered the position of her waist as she spoke.

"Giles filled me in on how becoming a slayer works, you know the whole one slayer dies and another is reborn, and all that…but I killed the slayer before me…" Joy sighed and stopped her routine stretches altogether. She stared at Marcus. "Why did the council make me, a murderer, a slayer?"

Marcus sighed and motioned for her to continue to stretch. "Contrasting to the seemingly popular belief, the council does not have _that _much control over the slayers. The council does not choose the line of slayers, the council simply guides the girls once they are already chosen, by the Powers That Be."

"The Powers?" Joy had heard brief mention of the Powers, mostly from Giles and Buffy, but also occasionally from Angel. "They chose me to be the new slayer? But why? What do they know about me?"

"Obviously enough to realize that you were the best choice for the position." Marcus shrugged and tapped the middle of her back, instructing her to straighten out her posture. "The Powers rarely make mistakes." He told her with a slight grin, indicating his firm belief in the Powers' ability to choose an appropriate slayer."

"So I guess that means you believe in me…" She smiled teasingly.

"Well, yea, I guess, I mean…" Marcus seemed suddenly at a loss of words. "You are an impressive young woman, Miss Peters…" He was blushing furiously and stuttering over his words.

"Ah, little Markie's embarrassed." Joy patted his head.

"No I'm…it's just that…I…" He fumbled for something to say.

"Don't worry about it Marcus. I'm just giving you a hard time. It's sort of fun actually." Joy returned to her stretches. "You're so sensitive."

"I am not!" Marcus tried to defend himself.

"Right, whatever you say." Joy straightened up fully. "I think I should go work with the seers now." She started walking towards the middle of the yard where the seers were already waiting.

"How are you today Joy?" Eline greeted Joy with a smile as the young slayer sat in the middle of the circle as usual.

"Fine, a little tired, but ready to work, as always." Joy crossed her legs and shut her eyes tightly. "What am I trying to see today? More deaths, possibly my own?" She gave a nervous smile. She was slightly distracted by what she had learned from Marcus earlier about how she was chosen to be a slayer. It intrigued her and yet confused her at the same time. What tie did she have to the Powers? Why would they want her to be in the position to fight against all evil? She wasn't anybody special, was she?

"Just clear your thoughts Joy." Eline instructed. Her voice instantly started fading as Joy forced her brain to empty and allowed the silence to take over.

This time though, Joy didn't sit silently for hours waiting for something to happen and then coming out of her trance with a disappointing emptiness at the pit of her stomach because of the lack of information that she had learned from her meditation. Today, she had barely cleared her head when a bright light flooded her mind and her soul seemed to be dragged to a place unknown in her reality. She wasn't just waiting with a clear head to see something she was experiencing what felt like a different realm, a different ethereal plane of existence.

All around her was a brilliant light that seemed to sparkle and glow. And there was a sort of slight buzzing, almost a hum that thrummed throughout her body. She stretched inside her mind trying to see more and then it happened. Someone appeared…a woman. She was beautiful, she was beyond beauty, she was magical, majestic, inhumane…and then she spoke, and her voice was more glorious then anything that Joy had ever heard before.

"I have not brought you here to frighten you Joy…" The woman crooned gracefully. "I believe that it is finally time for the truth to be revealed to you. I had hoped you would never need to know, however, I realize now that even I can not keep your gifts from developing further. I should have known this of course, since it was I who gave them to you in the beginning."

"What do you mean…" Joy responded softly, a little surprised that she had managed to find her voice at all in the presence of this strange and obviously supernatural woman. "Who are you?"

"I thought you would recognize me…it was a foolish hope I suppose…you were too young, obviously." The woman hung her head, letting her waist-long golden-blonde hair flow down the front of her slender shoulders. As she glanced back up, Joy cocked her head, slightly recognizing the familiar bright turquoise glint of the woman's eyes. "Joy I am…"

"Mom?" Joy cut her off with a disbelieving gasp. "Are you my…mother?"

The woman's face lit up with a pleased smile. "I knew you would recognize me!" She held out her arms. "My dear daughter."

"No, it's not possible…" Joy shook her head. "My mom was a model. Victoria Lyle Peters. She was a famous model and she died last year. She was murdered…" Joy's eyes were brimming with tears but even as she spoke the very true words, she realized that this woman standing in front of her was definitely who she believed her to be. "You can't be…I mean…how?"

"I am so sorry you had to find out this way, Joy. Trust me I would have rather you knew the truth about me when you were a baby. I would rather have had you be with me as a child, grown up with me as your mother, instead of being raised by those people who you believed to be your parents…" The woman's voice wavered with emotion. "Joy, I have always looked after you even though I could not be with you, and I have never not loved you. I do not know how to make you understand, but please believe that if there had been another way…"

Joy stopped her. "I do believe you, or I will believe you, but I need you to tell me everything…tell me everything…"

When she was finally snapped out of her ethereal vision, the seers were all standing around her with wide tense frowns and nervous eyes. As soon as Joy shook herself free from her meditation and started gasping to catch her breath, Eline burst out in plain relief.

"I've never seen someone in a vision for that long before! Joy, you had us so worried!" She rushed to Joy's side and tried to place a comforting hand on the young slayer's back.

Joy jerked away instinctively. "How long was I gone for?"

"Almost four hours…" One of the seers replied breathily.

Joy's eyebrows lifted and she sighed softly. "No wonder I'm so tired." She glanced up at the sky, noticing how dark it had become. "I'm going to bed." Her voice was shaky but she was trying hard not reveal her the true emotion she was feeling.

"But, what about…" Eline wanted to know so badly but she sensed Joy's need for her privacy to be respected. "Of course you're tired, umm, sleep well…"

Joy's body trembled as she pushed herself to her feet and took off at a nervous sprint back towards the Council building, wanting nothing more then the privacy of her own room. But as she passed Angel's door, she realized that she didn't want to be alone as much as she wanted to be comforted. She retraced her steps down the hallway until she was standing in front of the door to Angel's room. She raised her hand and rapt quickly with her fingernails. When he didn't respond she knocked harder with her knuckles. As she waited for him to respond, she took long deep breaths, trying to keep herself calm.

"Joy, what's wrong?" Angel asked instantly as he opened the door and saw the young slayer standing in the hallway, looking absolutely stunned and horrified.

"Umm, well," Her voice shook slightly and her breathing turned jittery. "I needed to talk to someone…" She held her hands together tightly, trying to stop her shaking. "Can I maybe umm, can I come in?" She sighed. "I just don't think I can be alone right now…"

"Yea, of course Joy, you know you don't have to ask." Angel took her hand and pulled her into his room. After he closed the door he turned to look at her, staring steadily into her eyes as though trying to figure out what was wrong.

She turned her head from him to break the eye connection and crossed her arms firmly in front of her chest. She was determined not to show emotions, but her violent trembling sort of gave her away.

"Look, I know how much you hate to seem insecure or weak or anything in front of me, but I need to know what's wrong Joy. Please talk to me, be completely honest." Angel turned her to face him and placed his hands firmly on her shoulders. His soulful eyes once again tried to penetrate into her brain to read her hidden thoughts and feelings.

"I just came from the seers…" Joy started slowly, trying to steady her voice.

"Did you have another vision?" Angel asked calmly.

"Yea, something like that." Joy shook her head. "I don't know what it was really, I was taken somewhere else…" She whimpered from the memory. "I think the Powers like took over my mind or something…" Her eyes watered. "And, umm, I met someone, umm, a Goddess…"

Angel's eyes were wide as he listened to her. He could tell that she wasn't completely stable on her feet, so he gently led her over to the bed and motioned for her to sit. He stood, leaning against the wall, still watching her as she continued to tell him what happened.

"She was beautiful. The most beautiful woman I've ever seen! She could have been an angel!" She smiled dreamily.

"Who was she?" Angel asked tenderly.

"Umm, she was my mother." Joy stated simply.

"Your mother? Wait, what?" Angel frowned.

"Yea, I don't know, it's sort of weird, but I knew she was even before she told me. I could feel the connection between us. My mother is a goddess, and she is amazing! I could feel the power just emitting from her. She had the essence of power and the glory of what she is…" Joy's eyes glowed as she spoke about the meeting with her mother. Angel was shocked.

"But, how could your mom have been a goddess? I mean, usually goddesses aren't killed by simple vampires…"

"No, no, no," Joy shook her head. "My mom, or at least the woman that I thought was my mom, wasn't really my mom." She sighed and noticed Angel's confusion and realized that she would have to explain everything, from the beginning. "My mom, my real mom's name is Iris. Seventeen years ago she lived here on earth, in California actually. She knew about her destiny as a goddess because of her special seer, or Wicca, powers. She also knew that the Powers expected her to retire as a goddess on her eighteenth birthday. But what she didn't realize was that when she was only seventeen, she would meet a man and fall madly in love with him." Joy smiled as she relayed the story of her mother's life to Angel. He listened with respectful silence. "Iris realized that it would be impossible for her to marry the man that she loved because of what had to happen to her in only one year. But, defying her destiny, Iris gave her life to this man and he returned her love fully. When she became pregnant, she wanted to get married but she had less then a year before the Powers would claim her." Joy's eyes started to water. "Iris could not avoid her destiny, she had signed her soul to the Powers years before she had ever met her love, when she was only twelve years old. Knowing that there was no other way, Iris made an argument with him to make him leave her. She lied to him to force him away from her and so she bore her child all alone and only a week later she had found a new family to take the baby so that Iris could go and live out her life as a goddess."

"Joy, are you…"

Joy nodded. "I was the baby girl that she left behind on earth. My mother told me that she named me 'Joy' because I was the only memory of the joy that she had had with her love."

"I don't understand Joy…" Angel shook his head in obvious disbelief. "There hasn't been any record of a direct descendent from the goddesses for centuries!"

"I know." Joy nodded. "That is one of the main reasons that the Powers agreed for me to be the next slayer. When my mother suggested me, the Powers agreed that I have a lot of potential because of the goddess powers that are in me." She sighed. "It's just so incredible for me to finally learn all of this, I'm not really sure how it, I mean what it…" She lost all control of emotions suddenly and started sobbing. "I never knew my parents Angel! I never knew my real parents! My real mom was a goddess, and who knows who my real dad is!" She sniffled in between her words and her body started trembling again. Angel held her tight to himself, trying to calm her down. "My parents knew, I saw that in my other vision. My mom had wanted to tell me the truth before she died…how could I not have known?"

"Joy, calm down. Just take deep, slow breaths…" Angel rubbed her back soothingly. "Just breathe."

"Angel what does it mean? I don't know what to do now…am I a slayer, or a seer, or a goddess…" She started sobbing harder as she recognized all the possibilities she now had to face. "I don't know what this means, Angel. What do the Powers expect of me?"

"Nothing Joy, nothing more then what you already do. You are a slayer, but you just happen to have more powers then Buffy does, that's all." Angel tried to reassure her, even though he wasn't really sure if what he was saying was true at all.

"I was finally learning to be a slayer and now I have to deal with all this too…" Joy shook her head with a slight sob and dropped her forehead onto Angel's shoulder. He held her in his arms and let her cry for a minute before she spoke again. "I don't think I'm strong enough for all of this Angel…I don't think I'm strong enough to handle it…"

"Joy, you are probably the strongest young woman that I have ever known. With the death of your parents, and now this gift of the sight from a Goddess, who's actually your mother…and your slayer powers, which are incredible…I don't know Joy, you seem to have faced things that Buffy never has and could never understand." He held her up so that he was staring straight into her eyes again. "I know you are capable to handle anything that comes into your life."

"Really?" She smiled slightly through tear-blurred eyes. "Do you really believe in me that much Angel?"

"You know I do. I've witnessed changes in your life since you first came to Sunnydale that I never would have thought possible." Angel grinned. "I should have known that you are a goddess." He used the sleeve of his shirt to dry the tears from Joy's eyes. "Is there anything else you want to talk about before you go to bed, Joy? You need your rest…"

Joy whimpered. "Angel, you're always so patient with me. I feel a little guilty asking you for any more favors, but, umm, I'm not sure how much I'd be able to sleep alone tonight." She shivered. "Would you mind if I stay here for tonight, with you?"

Angel shook his head. "Not at all Joy. Anything I can do to make you feel better."

"Thank you Angel."

"Try to sleep now, you've had a long day." He motioned for her to lay on the large bed. She laid back, hugging her arms tightly to herself. "Umm…" He hesitated a little. "Do you want me to lay down with you?"

"Would you mind?" Joy asked hopefully.

"Of course not," Angel instantly laid down beside her and she instinctively curled up close to him, forcing him to wrap his arms around her. He held her for almost an hour in silence. He wasn't sleeping and by her continuous sniffles and random breathing, he knew that she was still awake as well. He soon lost track of time, but he assumed that they had been laying still for almost two hours before either of them spoke again.

"Angel, do you know how much you mean to me?" She whispered softly into the dark shadow of his face only a few inches away from her own.

"I think so Joy," Angel whispered back. "You mean just as much to me, you know?"

"I know." Joy breathed deeply and silence ensued for a few more minutes before Angel spoke again.

"I've never told you how I came to find you Joy…" Angel started slowly. "Last year, when I first came to you…it wasn't by accident or anything." Joy was listening silently. "I was sent to you, to train you and to watch over you."

"By who?" Joy asked softly.

"The Powers. The sought me out and ordered me to find you and train you to be a slayer and to protect you from anything that might want to hurt you." Angel admitted. "You were my assignment and to be completely honest, I sort of regretted it at first." Joy's breathing paused briefly before he continued. "I didn't understand why the Powers would put someone like me in charge of the new slayer. I didn't want to be bothered by the responsibility, but I didn't have a choice."

"Do you still regret me, Angel?" Joy wanted to know.

"No." Angel answered without any thought. "I don't regret anything about this past year. Training you and protecting you has turned out so much different then I ever thought it could. I can't even imagine how different my year would have been without you in it. You are an amazing young woman Joy, and I am grateful if I can take even the slightest credit for what you have become this year."

"I think you can take more then just slight credit Angel. Without you I doubt I ever would have accepted my fate as the slayer. You are the only person that I felt I could trust! You're the reason I let Buffy and her slayeretts into my life. You are the reason I am what I am now!" She was crying again, this time for pure emotional excitement and joy. She felt Angel's grip tighten a little and she felt so perfectly safe that she didn't want to move or speak.

Angel broke the silence again. "But Joy, I need to make sure of something…I'm not really sure how to say it without making things awkward, but I have to be certain…" He cleared his throat and slightly loosened his hold on her. "Besides the emotional, umm, bond that we share in our watcher and slayer relationship, there can't be anything else between us. You know that right?"

"What are you trying to say Angel?" Joy hesitated a little. "You are like the best friend I have ever had."

"I'm sure you've heard about the, umm, relationship that Buffy and I had, but you and I can't, umm, we can't have that sort of relationship Joy…" Angel seemed to be hating everything that he was saying.

Joy gasped softly and quickly cut him off. "Angel, I don't know if you really believe that we had the potential for that, but we don't! Seriously! As far as I'm concerned, you are my brother. You are the person that cares about my safety, my happiness, my sadness…I would never expect one of my boyfriends to bear that sort of responsibility. Well then again I wouldn't want anybody to take responsibility for me, but you have offered yourself so willingly that I can't help but love you for it. The love that I have for you is something that I have never felt for anyone. It's the love that I know I would have for a brother if I ever had one, or for my real father, if I had ever known him."

"Really?" Angel's tone was instantly lighter. "I'm so relieved."

"Is that how you feel for me, Angel? Like a sister?" Joy asked expectantly.

"I feel for you exactly as you have just described. You said everything that I hoped you felt because it's what I feel. I've never had such a desire to look after somebody as I do with you!" Angel's voice seemed to be grinning. "I'm sorry I had to bring it up, I just needed to be sure."

"I'm glad you did, because I wanted to, but I was way too nervous to say anything!" Joy located his hand and grasped it tightly with her own. "I love you Angel!" She giggled.

"I love you too, Joy!" He leaned forward and kissed her forehead softly. "My perfect little sister."

"Angel, can I talk to you about something else, that's been sort of on my mind lately…" She waited for Angel to grunt his approval for whatever conversation she wanted to begin. "So, you've known Spike for a long time, I guess, right?"

"Spike?" Angel almost growled the name. "Why do you care about him?"

"Umm, well, I don't know…" She hesitated. "There's just something about him, and, umm, he sort of intrigues me." She smiled a little to herself. "I know I shouldn't be thinking about him, but I can't really help it." Angel unconsciously removed his arms from around Joy and leaned up on his elbows, glaring down at her in the darkness. Joy didn't like the silence. "Come on Angel, tell me about him!"

"What do you want to know?" Angel asked tersely.

"Has he ever mentioned me?" Joy asked quietly. "I mean, do you think he's at all interested in me?"

Angel let out a deep breath. "Joy, you shouldn't think about Spike like this."

"I can't help it!" Joy sighed. "I swore to myself that I'd never let myself think about him like this, but I seriously can't help it! He's been so good to me. A lot like you, except I don't think of him like a brother…" She bit her lip and stretched out her hand in the dark trying to find Angel's hand. "Don't hate me Angel, please…"

"I'd never hate you Joy." Angel felt her soft hand pressing against his fingers and he took her hand encouragingly. "I realize you can't help who you're, umm, attracted to, but I just wish that it didn't have to be Spike."

"What do you have against him?"

"Umm, isn't it kind of obvious Joy?" Angel laughed a little.

"Not really. I mean sure, he's a vampire, but so are you, and you don't seem to have any problem with me being with you. So why should you care so much about me being with Spike…just because I care about him a little differently…"

"Joy, I have a soul!" Angel reminded her. "Don't you realize the difference between me and Spike?"

"Yes I do," Joy assured him. "You are restrained by something that lives inside of you reminding you every day of the never ending guilt you will feel if you kill, but he is restrained by nothing but a little headache if he were to kill. Trust me, I understand the difference…"

"Joy, it's more then just the guilt that's keeping from killing again."

"I know Angel, I didn't mean to sound insensitive." Joy quickly spoke up. "I understand that you've changed and everything since you've gotten your soul. Don't worry, I'd never think that you would want to kill or anything, I didn't mean that…" She sighed. "I just wish you'd give him a break! Why're you always so hard on Spike? From what Buffy tells me, he's been trying really hard to fit in!"

"Well yea, he's doing a good job, but, umm…" Angel took a deep breath. "Okay Joy, since you obviously aren't going to get over this whole Spike-crush very quickly…"

"It's not a 'crush' Angel! That sounds so juvenile! I'm not even sure what it is, it's just an interest!" Joy defended herself.

"Whatever you say, anyway…" Angel continued, ignoring Joy. "If you're going to let yourself get involved with Spike then I feel it is my duty to make sure that you completely understand what you'll be getting yourself into. When I sired Spike it took him a very short time to become one of the most violent and dangerous vampires around. He has spent over a hundred years brutally murdering people, for fun! Did you know how he got his name? It's because he used to torture people with railroad spikes. He wasn't a good person, well he wasn't even a person really, he's a vampire, obviously. But my point is, he's a monster."

"He was a monster…" Joy interrupted softly.

"Yes, and if the government hadn't chosen to experiment on him he would still be a monster, if Buffy hadn't killed him by now. For the past couple years he has been controlled by the chip in his head, but without it, he'd be just as violent as ever. You're right about our differences, I do have a soul, but that makes me realize how horrible I used to be. It's changed my way of life and I never want to be able to return to my previous vampire state! Spike doesn't have that same desire to remain, well good. I have no doubt that without the chip, he'd waste no time returning to his former brutality."

"Are you trying to scare me off, Angel?" Joy asked.

"No. I don't think you're capable of being scared away by anyone Joy. I just don't want you to blindly enter into anything with him and then be disappointed when you realize the truth. I want to make sure that you understand everything about him before you let him into your life."

"Angel, I get that you're worried, but I know how to protect myself from guys, okay. Besides, if I ever need you I know that you'll be happy to dust him for me!" Joy giggled a little.

"You better believe I will!" Angel agreed fervently. He sighed and his voice took on a more serious note again. "Just promise me that you'll be careful. Don't fall too hard, too fast. Okay?"

"I promise Angel." Joy smiled and nestled her head against his chest. "Wait, since you're being so serious about all this, does that mean that Spike's mentioned me before?"

"Goodnight Joy." Angel said quickly with a slight smile in his tone.

"I knew it!" Joy smiled. "Goodnight Angel."


	37. Chapter Thirty Seven

Chapter Thirty-Seven: Sunnydale and Spike

The next day, Joy worked as hard as possible to avoid all council members who would be interested in asking her questions about her vision the previous day. She had said everything she felt she needed to say to Angel, and as far as she was concerned about it, these councilmen had no business prying into her past life, concerning her mother or anything else for that matter. So she remained closed on the subject.

At seven o'clock that night though, Joy was unable to ignore the new powers that her mother had promised would only continue to expand and grow more powerful as she aged.

"You are not concentrating Joy!" Marcus scolded as Joy tripped over her own feet during a common lunge and kick. "You have never shown any weaknesses with this move, why is it so complicated for you now?"

Joy shook her head and let out a long frustrated sigh. "I know, I just tripped…" She wrung out her hands and moved her head around in a circle to stretch. "I'm just tired. But it's okay…" She paused and then performed the move again flawlessly this time. "See, there's nothing wrong. I'm perfectly capable of all my moves…"

Marcus grunted, not quite convinced. "Again, this time add a spinning jump." He snapped his fingers when he wanted her to start the move and she obeyed quickly. "Good." He moved around her slowly and she stood still taking deep breaths, preparing herself for whatever he would demand of her next. "I want to test your reflexes, your instincts…do what you feel…" He paused for a minute and she closed her eyes trying to clear her head and feel the air moving around her, as though hoping it would speak to her. She wasn't quite sure what he'd throw at her today but for the past few weeks he'd been training her with everything from bolts of magic from the council's powerful Wiccas to dummies dressed up as vampires being thrown at her from all angles.

"Okay, I'm ready!" Joy called out with her eyes still closed.

Marcus snapped his fingers to alert her that he was going to begin and then a large sack packed full of sand swung down from somewhere above Joy's head and Joy expertly ducked just in time to miss it and then just as easily blocked another one with a high jump kick. Her eyes snapped open as she heard the soft clink of the metal of blades bumping together being prepared to be thrown. She saw which direction they were flying from and bent backwards as the skimmed just an inch above her stomach. Three more small daggers flew out her and she dropped to the floor, rolling quickly to avoid them. He stopped for a moment to reorganize his weapons, which gave Joy enough time to stand and catch her breath. Which probably wasn't the best thing for her to do because the second that she closed her eyes again and started clearing her mind for the next segment of attacks, she was forced into an emptiness that set her up for a crushing vision.

"Oh god…" Joy held her head in pain and dropped to her knees. "Stop!" She ordered the vision that had erupted inside her mind but it just got worse. The second it ended she was aware of Marcus kneeling beside her with a worried frown creasing his young face.

"Joy, are you alright?" Marcus reached out a tentative hand but pulled it back quickly. "I think I might be overworking you, perhaps you need a rest."

Joy's body shook as Marcus helped her to her feet. "No, I don't need rest, I've got to go!" She panted and started sprinting towards the main building in a desperate search for Angel.

"What's wrong?" Angel opened his bedroom door the second he smelled the fear cloaking Joy's body as she sprinted down the hallway towards him. She was still trying to catch her breath. She was motioning furiously with her hands but barely saying anything. Angel placed his hands on Joy's shoulders and stared deep into her eyes, waiting for her to calm down enough to speak.

"I saw an attack…they'll be gone, all of them…Buffy won't be able to help…" She panted.

"Calm down," Angel urged. Marcus came rushing down the hallway, finally catching up with his runaway slayer. "Tell me what you saw…"

"There's no time!" Joy decided vehemently. "We've got to leave now, or we won't get there in time." She started rushing down the hallway towards her own room. "I'm the only one that can help…"

"Joy stop!" Marcus insisted, hurrying after her. "Explain your hurry to us and then we can perhaps help you…" he didn't seem to convinced of really being able to do anything for the hysteric girl.

"Buffy will be out tomorrow night…and everyone at home…they'll be unprotected."

"Joy, you're too unnerved. Vampire's can not enter without an invite…" Angel reminded gently, but Joy was already shaking her head.

"They don't enter. They burn the house down. Nobody will survive."

"Why are your visions always so damn deadly?" Angel growled. When Joy started frantically stuffing her clothes back into her bag he sighed. "Joy, let's just call Buffy and warn them."

Joy nodded absently and continued packing up her bags. She handed her cell phone to Angel and he quickly dialed Buffy. When there was no answer he tried Xander, and then Dawn's cell phone, but still nobody would answer. He turned to Joy with an apologetic smile. Joy didn't need an explanation.

"We have to go Angel." Joy stated softly.

"Right," Angel didn't try to argue again. "Marcus, please arrange for our plane. I'll be ready in five minutes, Joy." He left Joy's room and headed back to his own to gather his things.

Marcus was left alone with Joy, staring at her in surprise and confusion. "Umm, Miss Peters…Joy…are you sure…"

She silenced him with a simple nod of her head. "Marcus, I have to go." She turned to him slowly. "I've learned a lot from you this past month and I'm grateful, I guess, but honestly I've learned everything I can. You know it. There's nothing else you can teach me, I'm ready to go back home. Admit it."

Marcus nodded in agreement. "I will go and arrange your transportation back to the states."

"Thank you for understanding." Joy stuffed the final piece of clothing into her suitcase and zipped it closed. "I'm going to go and say goodbye to Eline."

Ten minutes later, Angel and Joy were sitting on the private plane that was ready to take them back to California. Joy was sitting in a large chair, with her knees tensely hugged into her chest. She was rocking back and forth nervously, silently counting the seconds as they passed.

Angel sat across the aisle from her, watching her fearfully. He'd never seen her so distraught before. Even though this month at the council was supposed to have helped her and given her answers, as far as Angel was concerned it only made her life more confusing and stressful.

"Joy, there's nothing you can do right now so you might as well try to think about something else." Angel encouraged. "You are going to drive yourself crazy thinking about it by time we get to Sunnydale."

Joy's head snapped up and she almost fell out of her chair when Angel spoke. She seemed to have forgotten that he was there.

"I'm serious. Try to rest. You have almost twelve more hours before we're there." Angel suggested. "If anything really exciting happens I'll wake you up, okay?"

Joy nodded, "Okay, fine. But I doubt I'll be able to sleep for very long."

"Just try."

Almost twelve hours later though Joy was still very much asleep. The plane was only a few minutes away from landing at its private airstrip in Sunnydale and the sun had just set. Angel knew that Joy would panic when she realized that her foreseen attack could happen at any time.

The pilot announced that they were reaching their destination and Joy started to stir. She opened her eyes slightly and noticed Angel staring out the window at the dark city that they were quickly approaching.

"Why did you let me sleep so long?" Joy accused as she sat up and stretched.

"Well, I thought you needed rest. It's probably going to be a long night for you."

"God I hope we're not too late." Joy bit her lip and checked the time on her cell phone. She kept unconsciously chewing on her lip as the plane touched down and the pilot pulled it to a complete stop.

"Joy, relax." Angel warned her in a low voice.

She glanced up at him and winced slightly as she realized that she had been grinding her lip so hard it was now bleeding. "I didn't even realize…" She wiped the blood away from her mouth and cleaned her fingers off with her shirt, staining the edges of the white material. "Let's hurry." She was up and out of her seat before the plane was even completely stopped. Angel stood up with her and grabbed both of their bags. They waited by the door and as soon as the steps were lowered Joy ran out into the night, with Angel sprinting along behind her towards the waiting taxi that Angel had thought to call for while they were still in the air.

Joy directed the driver to the cemetery and sat on the edge of her seat the entire way. The driver pulled up in front of the cemetery, frowning but not questioning his passengers' strange request for a drop-off place.

"I'm going to find Buffy. Go back to the house and check on the others." Joy instructed Angel. He didn't argue with her, he knew better then that. She leapt out of the car and sprinted towards the center of the cemetery and Angel instructed the cab to the Summers' house.

Joy ran silently through the grassy graveyard, leaping over short headstones, her eyes busily scanning the dark for any signs of the other slayer. Joy heard Buffy before she could see her. She ran towards the older slayer's voice.

"I don't know what you think you're all going to achieve here tonight, boys!" Buffy's words were interrupted occasionally by the sounds of fierce kicking and punching. Joy could just picture her fighting off a group of novice vampires who of course had absolutely no chance of surviving against Buffy's excellent skills.

Joy ducked under a low-hanging tree branch and spotted Buffy through the bushes. She was anxious to interrupt the slayer's nightly patrol, eager to inform Buffy of her mistake in leaving the house that night. However, before Joy had a change to emerge from her hidden location behind the bushes she was tackled to the ground from behind. She tried rolling the body away from her but her attacker was surprisingly strong for an ordinary vampire and she had to struggle more then usual. Her arms were pinned at her sides and knees were locked on either side of her legs to keep her from kicking. When she calmed her nerves down enough to comprehend her surroundings she realized that there was something very familiar about the scent of her attacker. She frowned as she recognized the strange mixed smell of cigarette smoke, leather, and cookies.

"Spike?" Joy strained her neck, trying to see behind her.

"Bloody hell!" Spike gasped. But he didn't move off of her right away. "What're you doing here Gidget?"

"I'm here to help Buffy…" She frowned and tried to wriggle free from his grip. "Can I get up, please?"

"Oh right, sorry!" Spike moved off of her and picked her up off the ground, setting her gently on her feet. "Now, why're you here? I thought you were in England!" There was an unmistakable smile on Spike's face and Joy couldn't help smiling herself. It was good seeming him again. It had been so long and Joy hadn't realized how much she'd missed him. For a split second she felt a strong urge to wrap her arms around his neck and let him hold her in a tight embrace…

"Umm," She quickly snapped her mind back to the reason that she had left England in the first place. "I have to tell Buffy…Dawn's in trouble, again." Joy turned away from Spike, trying to clear her thoughts about him out of her mind so she could focus on helping Buffy. She slipped through the bushes and rushed over to Buffy who had just knocked a vampire to the ground. "Buffy!"

Buffy spun around and her eyes grew wide when she saw Joy approaching her. "You're back!" She smiled happily. "How was England?" She ducked as a vampire swung at her and staked him quickly before returning her attention to Joy.

"Buffy I'm back because I needed to warn you! I had a vision." Joy was surprised at how easy it was for her to admit that to Buffy. It had only been a month but she had already become very comfortable with the fact that she was the daughter of a goddess.

"Really? Well, what's up?" Buffy didn't seem to be taking Joy's eagerness too seriously.

"It the house. It's going to be attacked…" Joy explained in a rush. "You have to come back with me now!"

Spike had followed Joy out from behind the bushes and was watching her in complete captivation. He knew that he had missed her while she had been away; he thought about her every day. But he hadn't realized how excited he would be to see her again when she finally returned. A vampire was trying to creep up behind the Slayers but Spike dusted him before either girl had a chance to fight.

"Joy, what are you talking about? I haven't seen this many vamps out for weeks!" Buffy motioned to the dozens of shadowy creatures creeping through the trees, starting to surround the two slayers.

"It's a distraction." Joy decided confidently. "Something is going on tonight, some sort of demon plan. They're going to set fire to your house and burn down everyone inside." Joy told Buffy quickly.

Buffy frowned for a second, not quite believing the anxious young slayer, but Joy's eyes were entirely serious. "Okay, umm, then what exactly am I supposed to do about these? I can't just ignore them!"

Joy frowned. "You have to! Dawn needs you." Joy knew that her sister was the only thing that could convince Buffy to abandon her nightly patrol. "Please, I know it sounds crazy, but you have to trust me."

Buffy was taking position to fight again but when she looked at Joy and saw how honestly terrified she looked, Buffy reconsidered. "Okay, let's go."

Joy nodded and pushed Buffy ahead of her, back through the trees, away from the approaching vampires. Before following, Joy glanced at Spike briefly.

"I'll stay here and take care of them." Spike decided with a casual shrug. "See you later, I guess."

Joy nodded and started to follow Buffy who, obviously completely believing Joy, was now sprinting down the sidewalk towards her house.

Spike touched her arm as she passed him. She glanced at him quickly. "Umm, I'm glad you're back, Gidget." He let a brief grin play at his lips before shaking it off and turning to the oncoming vampires, preparing to fight them.

Joy smiled to the back of his head and then turned and ran after Buffy's small shadow that had moved far into the distance.

By the time Joy arrived at the Summers' house, she found Buffy and Angel engaged in a furious battle against a group of at least a dozen vampires. Joy spied three more slowly sneaking towards the house carrying what looked like cans of kerosene and lighters. She slipped around the outside of the group attacking Buffy and Angel and crept up behind the other three. She pulled out the only weapons that she had with her (a small vile of holy water from the back pocket of her jeans, a stake stuffed in her belt, and a six-inch dagger sheathed inside her left boot) and took her stance behind the three vampires who were preparing to soak the house with the lighter fluid. One of the three vampires was hanging slightly farther behind the other two and Joy actually managed to stake it in the back before any of them had noticed her presence. As the first vampire turned to dust though the other two turned around angrily and instantly attacked Joy. She threw the holy water at one of the vampires and he growled in agony as the liquid burned on his face. Joy jump-kicked the other vampire in the chest, sending him stumbling backwards while the other one took a few moments to recover from his sizzling flesh. He did recover though, and with a new sense of revenge, he lunged at Joy knocking the stake from her hand. Joy tripped backwards briefly but quickly caught herself and punched the vampire hard in the gut before lifting her dagger and slicing him deep across the bicep. He screeched in pain and swung his arms angrily, trying to hit Joy but she managed to duck his swatting and kick his legs, sending him tumbling to the ground. Before Joy had a chance to think though the other vampire had wrapped his arms around her from behind, pinning her arms to her side. She threw her head back hard and made contact with his face. She felt his sharp teeth slice against her skull and she shut her eyes tightly trying to ignore the sting as blood dripped from the cut. Out of surprise he loosened his hold on her and she fought free, turning around and punching him hard in the face. As he tripped backwards on the ground with the other, Joy pulled her cigarette lighter out her front pocket and flicked it on, setting fire to both of the vampires jackets. They flailed their arms helplessly as their frames erupted in bright flames and they turned to dust.

Joy instantly turned back to assist the others in their own battles, but saw that between the two of them they had already managed to dust most of the vampires and there were now only two left. Angel was fighting one, particularly strong vampire who actually managed to knock Angel to the ground with a hard kick in the stomach. Buffy's attacker didn't seem quite as strong since Buffy easily kept her stance after his many hits, but he was quick and managed to avoid most of her attacks.

Joy wasn't sure which to help at the moment. But then Buffy's vampire got the better of her and kicked her legs out from underneath her, sending Buffy sprawling out on her back. He leapt on top of her pinning her arms to the ground. Joy jumped on the vampire's back and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling back hard until his neck snapped and a cloud of dust coated both girls.

"Thanks," Buffy sighed as Joy helped Buffy to her feet. The girls looked at Angel who had just dusted the vampire that he had been fighting. He grinned at the girls eagerly, ignoring the fact that his face had turned vamp.

Buffy didn't seem to notice it either, but Joy was still a little uncomfortable and she glanced away, trying to look natural and undisturbed. Angel noticed her unconscious frown though and quickly shook his fangs away.

"See, I told you to trust me." Joy didn't know what else to say.

Buffy nodded with a shrug. "Welcome home." She held out her arms and gave Joy a friendly hug. "Let's go inside. I'm sure Dawn will be excited to see you!" Joy turned back to Angel to make sure that he was following them inside.

Dawn was waiting to open the door as soon as she was certain that everything was safe outside. She squealed and pulled Joy into a tight hug. "I missed you!" She exclaimed excitedly as Joy returned the hug. "I've never had a more boring first month of summer!"

Joy laughed. "Well, mine wasn't too much better I'm sure!"

"You have to tell me all about England, did you get to see anything fun?" Dawn wanted to know.

"Actually, I never got to leave the council so I didn't see anything. I might as well have still been in California." Joy allowed Dawn to lead her over to the couch while Buffy and Angel whispered a brief explanation of the battle outside to Willow and Tara who had been waiting nervously by the front door.

"How'd you know about the vampires here?" Dawn asked curiously, not giving Joy much time to catch her breath.

"Umm, I had a vision…" Joy glanced up at the two witches who had moved into the living room, obviously eager to hear about the young slayer's vision.

"Joy, are you hungry? Do you want anything?" Tara offered thoughtfully.

Joy started to nod and then paused. "Wait…" She leapt to her feet and headed towards the front door. "I completely forgot about Spike…"

"Joy, wait…" Buffy tried to stop her from leaving. "I'm sure he's fine."

"He might need help!" Joy decided. "He was way outnumbered when I left him." She stepped outside. Buffy started to follow but Joy waved her back. "Don't worry about coming with me, I'm sure the two of us can handle things."

Buffy shrugged and stayed just outside the doorway with Angel, watching as Joy set off at a run back towards the cemetery.

"She's starting to care about him, isn't she?" Buffy asked Angel knowingly. Angel nodded without saying anything. "He cares about her too." Buffy sighed. "I could tell how much he missed her when she was gone."

"Joy talked about him a lot too." Angel told Buffy.

"I don't like it." Buffy decided. "He's not safe for her. She doesn't understand how dangerous…I mean he's not good for her…"

"I know." Angel agreed solemnly. "She promised to be careful, but I don't think she fully realizes why she needs to be."

"Maybe we should talk to Spike…" Buffy thought out loud. Angel didn't answer. "Yea, you're probably right." Buffy agreed as though she'd read his silent thoughts. "If he really cares about her as much as he seems to…we won't be able to talk him out of it…"

Joy sprinted towards the cemetery without thought. She felt bad to have forgotten about Spike for so long as it was and she was afraid that he might have been too outnumbered by all the other vampires. She realized that it was a bit strange for her to be worrying so much about Spike's well-being. He was a vampire after all and she shouldn't care, but…she tried to shake her worry about him from her mind, but her pace increased nervously.

A shadow loomed ahead of her in the distance and she squinted, trying to make out the form. Her hand instinctively moved to the stake sheathed at her side and she slowed down just a little, slightly apprehensive about whatever creature was moving towards her. Before the figure was near enough for Joy to see its face, she stepped off the path she was on, and into the shadows cast by the trees that lined the sidewalks, still creeping forward but much slower.

"Joy!" The figure called out to her just after she had ducked into the shadows.

"Spike!" Joy stepped out of the shadows, instantly recognizing his voice. "You're okay!" She couldn't help letting out a deep sigh of relief.

"Of course, didn't you think I'd make it?" Spike caught up to her and at closer inspection Joy realized that he was limping slightly and his lip was bloody.

"Well, yea, but…" Joy shrugged, not quite sure how to tell Spike that she had been worried about him. So instead of telling him she just smiled at him. "Umm, the others are waiting…" She was staring to feel a little nervous being alone with Spike. She wished that she could just talk to him normally like she used to but, now that she was starting to feel something for him…well she wasn't really sure what she was feeling but…_Oh this is ridiculous! _She criticized herself inside her head. _I'm just feeling all weird because I let myself believe that Spike might have feelings for me. I'm sure he doesn't and I'm just being a stupid girl…_She lifted her chin a little and turned away from Spike. "Come on." She started walking briskly back towards the house and Spike followed closely at her heels.

"Joy…" He spoke softly from directly behind her. "I meant what I said earlier…"

"About what?" Joy decided it was best for her sake to just play dumb and hope Spike couldn't read her feelings to well.

"I'm really glad that you're home. It was sort of boring without you around." He stepped up beside her and kept his pace even with hers.

"Are you saying that you missed me?" Joy couldn't stop the flirty grin that emerged on her face. _Maybe I'm not stupid. Maybe he really does care about me…_

"Yea, well, maybe I did…" Spike seemed a bit tense all of a sudden. "Didn't you miss me at all?"

"I don't know, I didn't really have much time to think about it." Joy teased. "The council kept me pretty busy…"

"Oh…well, yea, I was keeping pretty busy myself…" Spike decided quickly.

"Of course you were." Joy agreed. They were almost back at the Summers' residence and neither of them spoke again until they were inside with the others.

"Good, you're back." Buffy greeted them at the front door. "Come on into the living room, everyone's waiting."

Joy followed the older slayer into the room and sure enough everybody was gathered around, looking expectantly toward the entryway. Tara and Willow were sitting close together on the couch while Dawn sat opposite them in an overstuffed chair, and Giles leaned patiently against the wall. Xander and Anya sat on the other, smaller sofa and Joy realized that she hadn't even noticed them when she had been in the house before.

"Where's Riley?" Joy asked, noting the absence of Buffy's boyfriend.

"Oh, he left." Buffy stated simply.

Angel's eyes seemed to brighten just slightly from their usual broodiness but the natural shadow returned just as quickly when Buffy spoke again.

"He had to do some work for the government but he'll be back in a few days."

"Oh," Joy glanced at Angel, momentarily wondering if he had ever truly gotten over his feelings for Buffy, even though he claimed that he had. She didn't completely believe him.

"So Joy, tell us what happened in England…" Buffy urged.

Joy hesitated. "Can it wait…Spike's hurt…" She glanced at Spike who was trying to casually wipe the blood away from his lip, while he was very obviously favoring his right leg as he leaned against the doorframe.

"Don't worry about me Gidget," Spike frowned. "It's just a scratch." He straightened up and seemed to be forcing himself to put weight on his hurt leg. "I think I'll be going though, I'm not really one for the big reunions." He headed for the door. "See you around." His eyes locked briefly on Joy and she swore that he was trying to convey to her more then he was saying, but then he left.

"Don't worry about him, Joy." Angel echoed. "He'll be fine and he doesn't need you to baby him."

Joy blushed. "I wasn't trying to…" She shook her head. "Anyway, about the council…" The others leaned forward anxiously waiting to hear what she was going to tell them. "So, it turns out that I'm sort of a goddess." Joy stated bluntly. The others stared at her with frowns or puzzled stares and so Joy started telling them everything, starting with the second that she and Angel arrived in England to the second that they left. She didn't leave out anything that she thought they needed to know, of course she didn't mention a word about the private talks that she had shared with Angel; that was none of their business.

"Well, I guess we've got ourselves some more magic on our hands." Xander grinned.

Joy shook her head quickly. "I'm not magical Xander." She looked at Giles. "Am I?"

Giles sighed and nodded slowly. "Actually Joy, as the offspring of a goddess I believe you yourself are quite magical. Joy, your visions could prove to be a powerful asset in our constant fight against evil. You have already managed to save the lives of your friends twice and I am certain that your visions will prove to be just as powerful in the future."

Joy bit her lip. "Yea, I guess you're right…" She glanced up at Angel who was smiling down at her, looking almost proud. She smiled back at him. "I just wish my visions weren't so damn painful." She rubbed the temples of her head gently, trying to ignore the pain that still hadn't gone away since the vision.

"Your head still hurts?" Angel was instantly worried.

"Yea, just a little though. It's not half as bad as it was. I think I'm just tired…" Joy wanted an excuse to get away by herself.

"I'm sure you are, why don't you go to bed?" Buffy stood and retrieved Joy's suitcases from where Angel had left them just inside the front door. "Come on."

Joy nodded and started following Buffy up the stairs. She was surprised when everyone else started following, but she didn't say anything. Buffy led the way down the hallway, but instead of stopping at her own room, which Joy had been occupying before, she moved all the way to the end of the hallway to the spare bedroom that used to be a room purely for storage. Joy frowned as Buffy pushed the door opened and flipped on the light, standing back to let Joy enter.

"Oh my god!" She gasped as she entered the room. The room had been completely cleared of all the junk that used to be stored in it and all of her furniture from her aunt and uncle's house had been moved in and set up. The walls were still the old tacky brown color and the floral print drapes would definitely not be staying in the room, but she couldn't believe that she actually had her own room. "Buffy, this is incredible!"

"I thought it was time that you had your own room. Plus I was sort of sick of sharing a room with Dawn." Buffy grinned. "She snores."

"I do not!" Dawn defended herself from the hallway.

"I can't believe it! I have my own room!" Joy felt her eyes watering and she forced them back, ashamed at the emotion that was threatening to show.

"Well, Xander, Riley, and Spike helped me move the furniture and the girls arranged it all in here." Buffy explained.

"You guys are so…thank you!" She felt like the right thing to do would be to go around in a circle and hug everyone, but that would definitely take too much emotion, so she clenched her hands into fists and continued fighting against the tears.

"Well I'm glad you like it." Dawn smiled and stepped up next to Joy and gave her a quick hug. "Buffy said that as soon as you got home we'd go out and pick out paint and everything so you can decorate it how you want it."

"Great, that's awesome!" Joy nodded. "I really appreciate it, you guys. Thanks so much."

"Alright, now everyone out so Joy can get some sleep." Buffy ordered, pulling Dawn out by the elbow.

"Umm, okay…" Dawn stumbled out backwards. "I guess we'll talk tomorrow Joy!" She looked disappointed.

Joy nodded. "I'm sorry Dawn, but I'm so tired. Let's spend the day together tomorrow, okay? We'll have a complete girls' day, with manicures and everything." Dawn was smiling. "We'll even watch _Sixteen Candles_, okay?"

"Great, okay! I'll see you tomorrow!" Dawn, in a much better mood, followed Buffy willingly out of the room, leaving Joy alone to rest.


	38. Chapter Thirty Eight

_A/N: Wow, this is the longest chapter I think I've ever written. Hmm...well it takes care of a lot. Please review! _

Chapter Thirty-Eight: Boys and Girls

"I can't eat anymore!" Dawn whined, pressing her hands against her stomach. "I can't even move!"

"Yea, who's bright idea was it to spend almost a hundred dollars on junk food?" Joy moaned. "Oh yea, that was you!"

"It was your money…" Dawn defended herself.

"Ugh!" Joy groaned and readjusted her position on the couch. "I'm going to be so sick tomorrow!"

"You guys are so weird!" Buffy rolled her eyes as she entered the room carrying a large mug of steaming tea. "I thought you'd know better then to eat yourself sick…oh wait, you're only teenagers. I remember those days!" Buffy grinned and leaned down to pick up the half-empty package of red vines.

"No wait! What're you doing with those?" Dawn flailed out her arm to snatch the licorice back from her sister. "I wasn't done with those!"

"Yea, and would you mind bringing us some more soda?" Joy asked lazily.

"I thought you two were sick!" Buffy laughed and wandered into the kitchen, returning a moment later with a couple cans of coca-cola. "What movie are you watching now?" Buffy gave the girls the drinks and then plopped onto the armchair next to the couch.

"_My Fair Lady_, it's a classic!" Joy told her, retrieving another chocolate chip cookie from the plate on the coffee table.

Buffy smiled and helped herself to a slice of pizza from the half-empty box on the table. "I love this movie!"

"Well, you should watch it with us." Dawn invited.

Buffy nodded, "Yea, sure, why not!" She stretched her legs out in front of her and settled back in the chair. "I don't have anything better to do tonight."

"Buffy's lonely when Riley's gone. She doesn't have much of a life without him." Dawn grinned.

"That's not true!" Buffy frowned. "I just don't have many plans right now…"

"Because Riley's out of town…" Dawn reasoned.

"Shut up." Buffy threw a piece of popcorn at her sister.

"Quiet you two, this is the best part!" Joy shushed them and all three girls turned their eyes to the television.

"Oh I see how it is, you ask us to patrol for you while the two of you take the night off, painting your bloody nails and eating chocolate." Spike accused, eyeing the open bottles of nail polish on the table as he and Angel entered the house from the front door and joined the girls in the living room.

"Well, why else would we want the two of you to take over patrol for the night?" Buffy grinned.

"Quiet please!" Joy repeated, turning up the volume on the television and waved an oblivious hand towards the guys at the doorway.

The guys glanced at the TV and were politely quiet for a minute before getting bored.

"Well, patrol was slow, so we decided to call it a night. I'm going home." Spike waved to the group of girls who were still intently watching the movie. "If anyone cares…alright. 'Night everyone."

Joy snapped out of her movie daze for a minute to briefly glance up and offer Spike a smile. "Goodnight! See you tomorrow right?"

"Do you want me to patrol tomorrow too?" Spike asked.

"No! Oh, didn't I tell you? Tomorrow, the girls are going to help me pick out paint for my room and then tomorrow night we're going to start painting it. I thought that maybe you'd want to help…but you don't have to, of course, I mean…it's up to you!" Joy stumbled through the explanation and the bit her lip as she stared up at him hopefully.

"Oh right, well yea sure, I'll come and help Gidget." Spike nodded and started backing out. "Then, see you tomorrow."

"Okay, bye!" Joy smiled. "Are you leaving too Angel?"

"Sure, can I come over tomorrow too?" Angel asked jokingly as he started to follow Spike outside.

"Well, yea, of course you can Angel! Do you even have to ask?" Joy grinned and waved to him. "Shut the door on your way out, would you?" She giggled with the other girls as they returned to their girl time in front of the television.

"I haven't been shopping like this in, well, a really long time." Joy held the front door open with her foot while Dawn, Buffy, and Willow filed through, each with hands full of shopping bags. "I actually thought that painting my room would be boring, but I'm so excited now!" Joy let the door slam shut and followed the other girls upstairs where they all deposited their bags in the hallway just outside of Joy's new room.

"I love your paint choices!" Willow started rifling through the shopping bags. She pulled out a couple large plastic sheets that they had bought to cover the Joy's furniture. "Joy, you and Buffy can start moving the furniture into the center of the room and then Dawn and I will cover everything so they don't get messy from the paint."

Buffy nodded and her and Joy quickly had all the pieces of large furniture grouped in the center of the large bedroom so the walls were free to be painted.

"Tara will be back when her classes are over, and Anya and Xander said they would be here as soon as work was over, but I think we have plenty of people to paint your room!" Buffy grinned, "We probably don't need Angel and Spike too…"

Joy shrugged. "But they wanted to come, and I don't mind having them." She actually was very anxious for Spike to come and help, hoping that she might have a change to talk to him alone finally. She hadn't been able to really talk to him since she'd been back from England and since she'd had the discussion with Angel.

"Yea, but you don't really need them. I'm sure they've got better things to do…" Buffy's mind was racing, trying to find some way to keep Joy and Spike apart. No matter what Angel said, she was determined not to let them be together.

"Buffy, if they didn't want to come then they wouldn't. I am not forcing them to come and help!" She smiled.

Buffy sighed, deciding that she just wouldn't let Joy and Spike be alone together, ever. Soon they had the walls cleared and the furniture covered.

With eight people painting a room together, the job was finished fairly quickly. Joy instructed the three guys (Xander, Angel, and Spike) to roll the dark blue paint onto the bedroom walls while the girls began painting the walls of the adjoining bathroom in a shade of a deep red. Once the base colors had dried, Joy instructed everyone to begin decorating the blue walls by painting little silver stars scattered across the walls. And in the bathroom, the red walls were highlighted with random gold swirls and designs. The room was completely painted in only a few hours and all that remained by eleven o'clock that night were a final few touch-ups.

Willow and Tara soon abandoned the project, claiming that they were tired and wanted to go to bed early, even though their mischievous winks and flirtatious giggles suggested otherwise. Anya and Xander soon left as well, with Anya coming right out and saying she wanted to go home to have sex with her boyfriend. The others politely withheld their laughter for Xander's sake as he gently quieted his girlfriend and led her quickly out of the house to save himself from further embarrassment. Dawn had left the house almost an hour earlier for a date with Colin, so now the only ones who remained were the two vampires and the two slayers.

"Hey, Buffy, aren't you going to patrol tonight?" Joy asked casually as she touched up one of the silver stars beside the doorway.

Buffy seemed a little surprised by the suggestions. "Oh, umm, I don't know, do you want to?" Joy caught her quick glance towards Angel.

"Well actually, I'd like to finish up my room tonight, you know rearrange my furniture and stuff, but someone should patrol tonight. You could take Angel with you for help…"

"Oh no, I don't need Angel to come. He can stay here and help you with your room." Buffy said instantly.

"There's barely anything left to do and Spike's more then enough help! Take Angel with you Buffy. You never know when you'll need help and you know as well as I do that it's not always safe to patrol alone." Joy was not going to give up until Buffy agreed, but she could tell that Buffy was not too excited to leave her and Spike alone.

"Seriously Joy, I'll be fine by myself…" Buffy could tell that she was losing the argument and she looked at Angel pleadingly but he didn't know what to say to help her so he stayed quiet.

"Look Angel, thanks for all the help with my room, but there's really just nothing else for you to do! You'd be better off going with Buffy!" Joy urged them towards the hallway. "Spike can help me move my furniture back into place. We should be able to have everything done in less then an hour." She smiled as innocently as possible. "We'll be fine here, don't worry!"

Spike wisely kept silent, but he could sense Buffy and Angel's unease as they left the house for patrol, promising to be gone only for one hour. As soon as they were definitely out of the house, Joy closed her bedroom door so that she and Spike could be sure they would not be overheard by Willow or Tara.

"So, Gidget, the room's looking good, huh?" Spike tried to start a normal conversation with the girl who was staring at him with her beautiful turquoise eyes and making him feel quite nervous, which was very strange for the bad-ass vampire. "You'll be at home here in no time, huh?"

"Yea, sure," Joy brushed her long bangs away from her forehead with the back of her hand, trying to avoid the paint blotches on her fingers. "Spike, I didn't make Buffy and Angel leave so we could talk about my room…"

"I didn't think so." Spike grinned, a little relieved that she seemed to be taking control of the awkward situation. "Angel spoke with me."

Joy lifted an eyebrow. "About…"

Spike cleared his throat, now not so certain that he should have brought it up or if Angel had talked to him in confidence. "About what the two of you talked about in England."

"Oh, right…" Joy was a little surprised, considering how reluctant Angel had been to even talk to her about it. "So…"

"So, you're interested in me, huh?" Spike had seemed to regain all of his cocky confidence as he provoked Joy's embarrassment, evident by the rising flush in her cheeks.

"No, it's not like that…" Joy stuttered. She didn't know how to deny what Spike obviously knew was true. "I mean, well…"

"It's okay Joy." Spike quickly interrupted her rambling. "He wouldn't have brought it up if I hadn't have given him reason to…"

It took Joy a minute to realize what he meant but then she smiled. "Oh? So, you expressed an interest in me?" She grinned at his see-through expression.

"I might have mentioned something of the sort…" Spike grinned back.

They were being unusually flirtatious towards each other and neither seemed quite how to be themselves anymore. Joy seemed to have completely forgot about her ambition to quickly finish her room and her detail paintbrush was drooping idly in her hand, and she seemed unaware of the drops of silver paint that were staining her jeans.

"So, Angel told you that I umm, am interested…" Joy faltered for conversation again.

"Something of the sort yea," Spike agreed.

"Let me guess, he warned you stay away from me and all that shit?"

"Surprisingly no. It seems Peaches is a bit more sensitive then he let on to you Gidget." Spike suddenly noticed the dripping paintbrush and pointed it out to Joy who quickly returned her attention to the detail on the wall. "He did threaten me quite a bit, I must say, not that I think too much of his threats though. But he didn't try to make me stay away from you. He just warned me that I better be bloody good to you. Of course, that's not something he had to tell me…"

Joy bit her lip and glanced up at him briefly before blushing and having to look away. "Umm, well, hmm, I don't really know how to respond Spike…"

"I don't ever want you to be nervous around me Joy. I know that Angel told you all 'bout me and I'm sure you're not very comforted knowing what I used to be, but no matter what he told you, I am changed. I'm better then what I used to be…"

"Spike, you don't have to justify yourself to me." Joy shushed him. "I've already explained to Angel that I don't care what you used to be. All that matters to me is what you do now."

"Then I guess I better prove to you that I can be good." Spike grinned. "Well, good enough. I am still evil after all." He winked at her.

"Well you better be a little evil. I've had too many good boys in my life." She smiled back.

"So umm, where do we go from here?" Spike suddenly took on a more serious tone.

Joy sighed. "I don't know Spike. I hate to say it because I'm sure you're not going to like to hear it, but I have to be completely honest, I'm not sure if I'm totally ready for any kind of relationship right now…" She turned her back to Spike, not able to handle whatever expression he might be making. "It's just with Blake and Henri…I don't know…too many serious breakups you know? I just don't think I'm quite ready for another one…"

"Dammit Joy that's not fair!" Spike exclaimed. Joy had to turn around. It was one of the few times that Spike had ever called her by her actual name. It was nice for him to lose the nickname once in a while, even if it was preceded by profanity. "You can't predict a breakup before there's even been a bloody relationship!"

"Come on Spike, don't lecture me." Joy felt her temper rising. She had just confessed to Spike that she had feelings for him and now he was bold enough to get mad at her for wanting more time! "My first serious boyfriend turned into a vampire and I staked him. And my last relationship, well, he screwed me. Literally." Spike frowned a little. He hadn't heard much about what had happened with Blake. Joy sighed and decided to explain. "I slept with him and the next day I found him making out with my cheerleading captain."

"I'm sorry Joy…" Spike wasn't very good at serious discussions.

"Don't pity me Spike!" Joy warned. "Just please don't hate me for needing more time." She shrugged. "You have to understand that it's a little weird for me to think about. After all, you are a vampire and I am a vampire slayer. I know that Buffy's done it, but in my mind, I'm still having trouble even thinking about it working out…we're so different Spike!"

He hung his head and sighed. "I understand your reasons, of course. And I don't have much of a choice but to respect your wishes, so…when you feel ready to give me a chance, I'll be here waiting."

Joy smiled at him, her eyes lighting up excitedly. "Really Spike? You're going to wait for me?"

"What else can I do, Gidget?" He grinned, back to his self-assured teasing tone. "You've got my mind all buggered up and I can't stop thinking about you. I'll wait, 'cause I know you'll come around." He grinned.

"You're a little confident in yourself, aren't you William the Bloody?" Joy teased him, turning her back on him and pretending to ignore him as she continued to casually paint another star on the wall.

"You don't scare me Gidget…" Spike told her. "I know you'll come around eventually."

"Spike, I should warn you, even though Angel might be supporting us this far, but he made me promise to be careful and I'm going to." Joy made sure that Spike was aware of her precaution about whatever relationship might eventually form between the two of them.

"Good. You should be careful. But you should know that I promise to do everything I can not to disappoint you." Spike answered.

"Fair enough." Joy smiled. "Now, can we finish my room because I'd kind of like to get some sleep tonight!"

Spike immediately returned to work on the walls, adding more silver stars until Joy was satisfied. Then the two of them returned all the furniture to their appropriate places around the room. By midnight Joy decided to leave the rest of the arranging for the next day, deciding to sleep on the couch for the night so her room could air out the paint fumes.

Buffy returned by twelve thirty, only a few minutes after Spike had left with Joy's promise to give him a chance as long as he promised to give her time. When Buffy found Joy setting up blankets and pillows on the couch she had to fight her urge to confront Joy about what had happened with Spike. But she realized that she had to leave Joy's love life alone and let her make her own choices, however wrong Buffy thought they were, so she said goodnight and let her be, deciding to take out her sisterly frustrations on Dawn when she came home by lecturing her about her late hour; not that she really cared at all what time Dawn came home from her date. But by the time Dawn did come home, Buffy was already asleep and the only person awake to catch her late hour was Joy who hadn't been able to sleep at all since her mind was so busy with thoughts of Spike.

"How was your date?" Joy leaned up on her elbows as Dawn tiptoed through the front door, obviously assuming everybody would be asleep.

She jumped slightly and turned to Joy with wide eyes. "God freak me out why don't you? What are you doing down here?" Dawn slipped out of her high heels and joined Joy in the living room.

"I couldn't sleep with all the paint fumes in my room so I'm staying down here for the night…not that I'm sleeping much though." Joy explained. She moved her feet and motioned for Dawn to sit on the couch. "So, how was your date?"

"Perfect! As always!" Dawn smiled. "I am so in love!"

"Love, really?" Joy smiled. She had already heard from Dawn at least a dozen times already that she had decided that she was 'in love' so it was nothing new for Joy tonight, but for Dawn's sake she pretended to be completely surprised and delighted for her. "And do you think Colin's in love with you?"

"Definitely!" Dawn smiled giddily.

"How do you know?" Joy readjusted her head's position on the pillow and listened to Dawn attentively.

"Well, for one he's told me so." She sighed. "He tells me all the time! It's so sweet! He's so sweet…" Her eyes drifted off towards the ceiling and Joy knew she had finished talking about the night.

"Okay…" Joy rolled over on her side. "Well I'm glad you're so happy with your relationship."

Dawn gazed at her friend with squinted eyes. "What's up sweetie? You seem depressed, or upset, or sick maybe?"

Joy smiled slightly. "I'm not sick, don't worry. I just had a little bit of a strange night. I'm not really sure what my problem is actually, I guess I'm just confused…"

"About what?" When Joy didn't answer right away, Dawn started to tickle her feet until she sat up and confided in her.

"Do you promise that you won't tell anyone!" Joy waited as Dawn nodded emphatically. "Okay, well after you went on your date tonight, Buffy and Angel went patrolling and everyone else left too, so it was just Spike and me in my room…"

"Oh my god!" Dawn exclaimed at once.

"Dawn, you don't even know what I'm going to say!" Joy frowned. Dawn bit her lip and nodded quickly. "We started talking and, well, the topic of, umm, our relationship came up." She noticed Dawn's eyes widen curiously. "I'm sure you've noticed my interest in Spike before and his attraction to me, but we'd never talked about it before now…" Joy sighed. "He wants to have a relationship with me, I'm not sure if I'd go far enough to say boyfriend and girlfriend, it just sounds so simple and lame…I don't know what he wants exactly but I know that he wants to be in my life."

"Wow! That's incredible Joy! I mean, of course, I did notice that he was interested in you, but I didn't really expect him to say anything! That must have taken a lot of courage for him to tell you!" She smiled. "I didn't think he'd take that chance…"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I haven't known him to have an actual girlfriend since Drusilla."

"Who's Drusilla?" Joy asked quickly.

"Drusilla was Spike's sire, Angel was her sire. They were together for like a century!" Dawn shrugged. "She left him a few years ago for some demon or something."

"They were together until a few years ago?" Joy frowned. "Do you think he's over her?"

Dawn nodded. "I'm sure he is. I haven't heard him talk about her in forever! Besides, if he's shown you attention than I'm sure he means it. I can tell that he cares about you Joy, everyone can tell that, even Buffy, and trust me she doesn't like it. And since he cares about you so much, I don't think he'd ever want to hurt you with a meaningless fling, especially after your past. Does he know about Henri and everything?"

"Yea, he knows everything." She sighed. "He does seem to be serious about his feelings for me, and I don't think he'd toy with me either."

"So, what're you going to do about it?" Dawn asked after a moment of silence.

"I don't know yet. I asked him for some time and he told me he'd wait until I was ready. It was really sweet actually…" Joy felt herself slowly giving into the idea of a relationship with Spike.

"Okay, so here's my one attempt at advice and then I'm going to bud out…" Dawn cleared her throat. "Don't be afraid to take a chance just because you've been hurt in the past. Life is all about loving and losing and sometimes you've got to lose a little to gain a lot…"

"God Dawn, deep much?"

Dawn shrugged. "Yea, I think I heard it on a movie or something once. Anyway, it seemed like a good thing to say. So, like I was saying…I think you should give Spike a chance. Just a chance, if things don't work out then you'll move on and wait for someone else to come around."

"Really?" Joy took a deep breath. "You think I should date Spike?" She laughed as she said it out loud. "Buffy's going to flip!"

"Oh well, she could use a good shock every now and then!" Dawn stood up. "I'm going to bed. Think about what I said Joy."

"Goodnight." Joy watched Dawn disappear up the stairs towards her bedroom and then curled her knees tighter into her chest, letting her thoughts roam over the Spike situation. She didn't sleep any better after she had talked to Dawn, and if anything it was only more difficult for her to sleep because she was realizing that she did want to give Spike a chance and she had almost completely convinced herself to.

The next morning she had barely fallen asleep when Dawn was waking her up and insisting that they finish up her room quickly so they could go shopping for a new swimsuit for Dawn. Joy wanted to go back to sleep but she knew that once she was awake she would not be able to fall asleep again, so she stumbled into the kitchen where Tara was making pancakes and found a fresh pot of coffee already made. She poured herself a large mug and then followed Dawn upstairs to the bedroom that had aired out over night.

All the furniture was in place and all that was left for Dawn and Joy to finish was the simple finishing touches such as making the bed and organizing picture frames.

"I love the colors you've chosen!" Dawn smiled, spreading the thick dark blue comforter over the antique four-poster bed and setting up the silver throw-pillows against the headboard.

"Thanks." Joy nodded as she hung the dark blue, velvet curtains over the already hung transparent silver drapery that covered the window. "I wanted a room that felt like it was a starry night all the time! I love the stars!"

"Well, it definitely feels like nighttime." Dawn decided as she started to hang up Joy's large collection of clothing in the closet. "So did you decide what you're going to do about Spike yet?"

Joy nodded. "I guess your words of wisdom really paid off." Joy grinned jokingly. "I think I might give him a chance."

"Good!" Dawn seemed very confident that her advice the previous night had been right.

"Hey girls," Buffy poked her head inside the room. "The room looks great Joy!"

"I know, thanks so much for all the help Buffy!" Joy smiled.

Buffy joined Dawn by the closet and started helping with the clothes. "Hey Dawn, I think Willow could use some help with breakfast, why don't you go down and see?" She nudged her sister slightly with her elbow and Dawn immediately left, understanding her sister's meaning. "So, how long was Spike here last night?"

Joy knew that Buffy would bring it up eventually and she also knew that she'd have to talk to her. "He was only here for about an hour."

"Oh really?" Buffy's face showed her obvious delight but she was trying hard to hide it. She sighed. "Okay, I have to be honest with you Joy. I don't like the idea of you and Spike being together…"

"What do you mean, together?" Joy decided it would be best if she played dumb.

"I know that he's interested in you and from what Angel's told me, you're interested in him too…"

"You talked to Angel about this?" Joy felt betrayed. Angel was supposed to be on her side and now he was going behind her back and talking to Buffy about it!

"Look Joy, you have to understand…I know that Spike might seem great and charming and exciting, but he's dangerous, and he's not the kind of guy you should let yourself get involved with!" Buffy exclaimed.

"Buffy, I do understand. Spike's a vampire, a bad one, but who I let myself get involved with is not a decision for you, or for Angel to make."

"Joy, it's more then the fact that he's a vampire!" Buffy sighed, she was trying to decide how best to explain the situation to Joy without giving too much away about her own past connection with him. She realized there was no easy way around the facts so she just confessed everything. "I'm sure you've heard by now that Spike and I were sort of, umm, involved for a while…" Joy nodded and her left eye twitched a little as though she were trying to control her emotions. "It wasn't a relationship though, no matter what anyone might think. He claimed he loved me so I let him. It was stupid really. It was an obsession. A dangerously disillusioned crush. He had gone through a lot with the government implanting the chip in his head, and losing Drusilla, you have heard about Drusilla right?" Joy nodded, listening intently, curious about Buffy's past with Spike. "And I wasn't any better off! After Riley left I was all alone and under so much stress and well, Spike sort of became a convenient way to release my loneliness and bitterness. I used him and he used me, well it was a mutual decision to use each other to make ourselves happier. Are you understanding me?"

Joy frowned. "Not really. Basically you're saying that you were screwed up a while ago and so screwing a vampire made you happy?"

Buffy sighed. "No, that's not what I'm saying!" She tried to figure out exactly what she was trying to say. "Spike is used to using people. He's done it four over a hundred years. He uses them and then is done with them and it doesn't effect him at all because he has no soul." She stared at Joy pointedly. "If your not careful, he will hurt you Joy and it won't mean anything to him like you believe it will."

Joy shook her head. "He's different then you think Buffy. He may have used you, but you just admitted that you used him too! What makes you any better then him for that matter, Buffy?"

"That's not fair! He was a vampire, was I supposed to care about him?"

"You cared about Angel!"

"Angel has a soul! I loved…" She stopped herself and then continued. "I loved Angel and he loved me. It meant something to both of us. Spike doesn't remember what love is!"

"You don't know him."

"I know more about him then you do!"

"About him, sure! You know what you've read in books about his history, but that doesn't make you an expert on his life and his feelings!"

"But because you're attracted to him, you have some deep insight into who he really is, beneath the cruel fact that he's a blood-sucking monster?" Buffy's voice was raising and Joy was not going to back down. The girls stood close to each other with narrowed eyes and harsh voices.

"You have no right to judge him just because he didn't really love you! You took his obsession for granted Buffy and it pisses you off that you let him use you!" Joy yelled.

"I didn't let him use me! I used him! He had everything he wanted, he got to screw a slayer! He's killed slayers and he's screwed them, his life was complete!"

"That's sort of a low blow considering you're the slayer he screwed."

"Shut up!" Buffy shouted in Joy's face.

"Oh, I'm sorry, is that a painful memory for you or are just annoyed that I'm forcing you to face the facts?" Joy screamed back. "You let him in and then you kicked him out and he didn't care enough for your comfort…"

Buffy started to say something and then snapped her mouth shut, glared at Joy fiercely for a minute and then stormed out of the room, pushing past Dawn, Willow, and Tara who had gathered outside the doorway. Joy's body trembled with anger and she couldn't move or speak.

"Joy…" Dawn whispered from the doorway, not sure what to say.

"Not right now Dawn." Joy mumbled, turning around to slam her bedroom door shut so she could have some privacy. She needed to think.

Dawn's already convinced me to give him a chance, and I know that Buffy's just pissed off, but what if she has a point…I mean he is a vampire! I can't just ignore that! Joy finished hanging up all her clothes. _I've been so determined to prove something to him or to me, I'm not really sure…what do I have to prove? I don't have to prove anything! Not to me, or to Spike, or to Buffy! It's my life and I can do whatever I want and date whoever I want…_She squeezed her eyes shut and flopped onto her bed. _But it's more then that. I don't want to just date Spike I want to be with him, and I know that he wants to be with me…no matter what Buffy says about him! He does have a heart…it might not beat but that doesn't mean he doesn't have one. Right? I don't know what I'm saying! _She stuffed her head under a pillow and let out a short scream. _I can't give him a chance until I have myself figured out! Having a guy in my life right now, especially a vampire, will just screw me up more then I already am! _Joy sat up decisively.

Joy finished hanging up all her clothes. She squeezed her eyes shut and flopped onto her bed. She stuffed her head under a pillow and let out a short scream. Joy sat up decisively. 

"Dawn! Ready to go shopping?" Joy opened the door and found Dawn waiting in the hallway.

Her blue eyes widened curiously. "Are you sure you want to Joy? Because I can always go shopping later…"

Joy shook her head and cleared her throat. "No, let's go now! I don't feel like staying in today, so do you want to go to the Bronze tonight too?"

Dawn nodded slowly. "Sure, yea, let's make a day of it."

"Okay, I'll be ready in a half hour." Joy returned to her room and quickly got herself fixed up for the day.

"I can't believe how much we bought!" Dawn giggled excitedly as the girls dumped their shopping bags in Joy's room.

"It's called retail therapy." Joy shrugged. "It's the best remedy I've found for my stress." She started pulling her new clothes from her bags and hanging them in her closet.

"Yea, it's definitely a good way to relieve stress." Dawn smiled. "And so is dancing! I'll go put my stuff away and then change for the Bronze…you still want to go right?"

"Of course."

"Okay, let's leave in about twenty minutes?" Dawn suggested.

"Make it forty."

"Okay!" Dawn skipped from the room, carrying her shopping bags with her and leaving Joy alone to get ready for clubbing.

By eight o'clock the girls had adequately decked themselves out for a long night of stress-relieving dancing and. Dawn had chosen to wear a pair of tight jeans and a new white silk halter that Joy had convinced her to buy that afternoon. She left her soft curls down around her shoulders. Joy dressed in a black leather mini skirt a silky red backless halter that showed off her butterfly tattoo well. She framed her bright eyes with heavy black makeup and left her hair straight down.

"Where are you guys going?" Buffy called out from the kitchen as the girls opened the front door. She hadn't spoke to Joy since the argument and Joy didn't exactly mind.

"We're going to the Bronze. We'll probably be out late." Dawn spoke up quickly when she realized Joy wasn't going to say anything. She left before Buffy had a chance to stop them and hurried down the driveway to Joy's car.

"Did you want to invite Colin?" Joy asked as she sped towards the club.

Dawn shook her head slowly. "No, tonight's all about the girls…" She glanced sideways at Joy. "Of course Colin could bring a friend along for you to enjoy…"

"No thanks," Joy shook her head quickly. "I've had enough experience with Colin's friends."

"Oh, right…well he and Blake aren't really friends anymore you know. I'm sure he knows some guys that love to go out with you…" Dawn noticed Joy's teeth clenching and stopped talking. "Never mind. Tonight's just the girls. I'll pretend like I'm single and enjoy hitting on hot guys with you, okay?"

Joy smiled. "Thanks Dawn."

And true to her word, Dawn spent the majority of the night on the dance floor with Joy, finding single guys who seemed interested in dancing with them, and completely ignoring the fact that she was in a perfect relationship with a guy that she was in love with. Joy was trying hard to forget about her conflicting emotions concerning Spike and just enjoy her night out with her best friend.

"Hey girls," A deep, smooth voice spoke up from behind the girls as they sat at a small table, sipping on their sodas.

Dawn glanced at the three guys briefly, shrugged and then looked to Joy for her response. Joy turned to the guys and smiled at them flirtatiously. She didn't say anything though but with a small nod of her head they pulled three stools over to the girls' table.

"So, since our shopping today was so successful I think that tomorrow we should go to the beach and try out our new swimsuits…" Joy continued her conversation with Dawn as though the guys weren't even there.

"You girls wouldn't be interested in some company at the beach would you?" One of the guys asked.

"Do you mind? We're in the middle of a conversation." Joy arched an eyebrow and stared hard at the intruding guys who pulled back, a little surprised at her curtness.

"Right, umm, okay…" The guy frowned.

"Oh I'm sorry, I suppose that your motion of sitting with us was your first attempt to hit on us which you would then follow with an invitation for us to dance with you?" Joy smiled teasingly and fluttered her eyelashes.

"Right…" The guys were stunned by her forwardness and didn't know how to respond.

"So are you going to ask or not?" Joy asked.

"Huh?"

"Fine, let's dance!" Joy stood and motioned for Dawn to join her. The guys quickly stood and followed the girls out to the dance floor.

The instant they joined the throng of wild dancers the guys seemed to loosen up and take control. One of the guys, the only one with blonde hair, wrapped his arms around Dawn's waist and started swaying with the upbeat rock music. The other two guys, both with dark hair, moved to Joy. One of them moved in behind her, slithering his hands down her body until the rested on her his and the other danced facing her, pressing his body close to hers so that she was tightly sandwiched between the two young men. Their three bodies moved together, rocking and swaying to the beat, feeling the strong rhythm pulse through one another's bodies. While the music was slow it was easy for the three of them to sway in motion together, but as the beat picked up, it became difficult for the three to stay in unison and Joy soon decided that the guys' dancing was sloppy and boring and mostly just a mess of sleazy grinding and groping. She became tense and irritated but didn't make the guys leave her. She had come to the Bronze to dance and to forget about Spike, and she would dance with every looser it took to make her forget. She tried to close her eyes and lose herself in the music and the dance but when she felt hands on her waist, and her stomach, and lips on her neck, she realized that these losers were not what she needed to forget her problems. She opened her eyes and pushed the guys' hands away from her body.

"I'm sorry, but I'm not really in the mood for dancing right now…" She spun out of their reach and shrugged as she started walking towards the bar.

"Wait, come on!" One of the guys called out as both the guys followed her off of the dance floor. Dawn still seemed content dancing with her partner.

"I'm sorry!" Joy shook her head again and turned her attention to the bartender who was waiting to take her order. She put on her most flirtatious smile leaned forward on her elbows, giving the bartender a perfect view of her cleavage. "Hey there…" She drawled, licking her lips seductively. "I'll have a martini with two olives."

"Uh…" The bartender looked hesitant but he was also clearly captivated by her sultry beauty. He nodded slowly and turned away to fix her the drink that she ordered.

"Come on back and dance with us babe," One of the guys dropped into the seat next to her at the bar.

The other guy stood just behind her, breathing heavily down her neck. She sighed in frustration and shook her head.

"I'm not interested, alright." Joy smiled at the bartender as he served her the drink. "Thanks hon." She picked up the stick that speared the two olives and slid one off with her teeth and tongue, very slowly, making sure that was watching her. "You wouldn't be interested in dancing later would you?"

"Umm, well, I have to close tonight…so I really wouldn't have time…" The bartender stuttered and Joy sighed.

"What a shame." She slid off her barstool and walked away from the bar, glancing over her shoulder briefly and flipping her hair.

"What the hell is that?" One of the young guys demanded, following her away from the bar.

"What?" Joy asked innocently.

"You'd dance with him but now with us?" The other guy frowned. "We found you first!"

"What is that supposed to mean?" Joy shook her head. "I get bored if I'm with the same person for too long. And you guys have bored me." She shrugged with mock apology. She sipped from her drink and turned away from them again.

One of the guys grabbed at her arm and pulled her around forcefully, making her spill her drink. She made a move to hit him but before she had a chance he was shoved aside by another.

"Spike!" Joy gasped when she recognized the intruder.

The two guys angrily jumped to attention, ready to fight Spike, but he glared fiercely and shoved them both again with a low growl of warning and they backed off without another warning.

"Spike, umm, thanks, but you know that…"

"You can take care of yourself…" Spike finished Joy's sentence with a sigh. "That tune's getting' old Gidget."

"Right…" Joy smiled. "Well, thanks."

"Sure, anytime, pet…" He started backing up. "I guess I should be going now, and leave you to your, umm, fun…" He turned away and started walking slowly away.

Come on Joy, don't be an idiot! Joy told herself as she watched Spike getting farther away from her. _But he's not good. Remember everything that Buffy said…and she knows him well! I can't get involved with him…_She started chewing on the inside of her lip. _Hanging out with him wouldn't be getting involved with him though…maybe just a drink…but nothing else…I am not going to let myself fall for him…_He was getting farther away and she was starting to regret letting him go.

Joy told herself as she watched Spike getting farther away from her. She started chewing on the inside of her lip. He was getting farther away and she was starting to regret letting him go. 

"Hey Spike!" Joy called after him. "You know, the jerks made me spill my drink, and I kind of forgot to bring a lot of money with me tonight…" He had stopped and was slowly walking back towards her.

"And what do you expect me to do about it?"

"Well, maybe if you wanted to talk for a little, we could talk over drinks?" Joy grinned.

"I am not buying you any more alcohol! You're too young!" Spike insisted.

"Whatever! You drink more then anyone I've ever known! I just like to have a martini every now and then when I'm out with the girls…" She shrugged.

"Or out by yourself…or when your out flirting with other guys!" Spike reminded her.

"Well, yea…" She stared at him with her bright eyes and he grinned, giving in.

"Fine, but only one drink and then I'm out of here. I'm not going to sit around and talk with you when you're not really sure if you even want to be with me." He headed over to the bar and ordered Joy another Martini and himself a beer.

"Thank you Spike." Joy took her drink and motioned to an empty table where she and Spike sat down. "And Spike, I know that I _want _to be with you, but…"

"You're not ready to trust me."

"I don't know. I guess it's something like that."

"It is that Joy. You don't trust me, and honestly, you probably never will. But see, I'm alright with that." Spike sighed. "I know what I am and I realize that you have had plenty of bad experiences with other vampires…so I don't expect for you to be able to trust me…"

"Spike," Joy mumbled very quietly. She took a long sip of her drink and avoided eye contact with the vampire as she spoke. "That's not why I don't trust you."

"Really?" Spike was obviously surprised.

"Umm, it's not just you that I don't trust Spike…" Joy sighed. "I'm not sure I really trust guys, or umm, relationships right now." She quickly tried to hide her blushing face by bending over her glass and trying to take a sip, but the glass was already empty.

"Wait, what?" Spike seemed about to laugh. "You're afraid of relationships?"

"Well, no…I mean…" Joy lost whatever she wanted to say and snapped her mouth shut quickly. "Yea."

"Why?" Spike frowned. "I always got the impression you were pretty sure of yourself and of guys. From what Dawn says, you seem to be quite the dating guru!"

"From what Dawn says?" Joy frowned. "Do you think I'm a slut, Spike?"

"No! Not at all Joy…" Spike was not very convincing. "Well, not really…"

"How is that fair?" Joy sounded more despairing then upset. "A girl sleeps with her boyfriends, a couple of times, and she's labeled a slut. A guy sleeps with a different hoe every night and he's lauded as a sexy bad-ass!"

"Now that's not fair!" Spike insisted. "I am not with a different girl every night!"

"Spike, I wasn't necessarily talking about you…"

"I haven't even been with a girl since…well, it's been a while, let me tell you!" He gulped down half his beer nervously. "But anyway, I don't think you're a slut Joy…it's just that you didn't seem to be necessarily cautious when it came to men…" He nodded towards the dance floor where the two guys that had earlier been dancing with Joy were now dancing with two other girls.

"Okay, fine…" Joy nodded. "So I might be a little on the flirtatious side, but…these guys, these clubs guys, they're just for fun…" She eyed the guys with a scowl. "They aren't why I don't want to trust you, or other men…"

"I get that you've been hurt Joy, but I don't think you've actually been fair to relationships! I don't think you've really given men a fair chance!"

"What about Henri? And Blake?" Joy shook her head. "I'm sorry Spike, I don't think I've healed from my last two male disappointments."

"They're lame, Gidget." Spike told her softly. "They're just boys. They aren't worth your time and they aren't worth giving up on all relationships!"

"And what are you? This incredible man that will save me from my past pain and show me the meaning of…" She stopped herself. "Of what exactly? Of love maybe?"

"Perhaps." Spike shrugged. "I don't know Joy. I'm not saying that I have all the answers, and I'm not saying that it'll work out with us but, how will we know if you don't trust me enough to give me a fair chance?"

Joy smiled briefly but as she started to give in, a memory of staking Henri flashed through her mind and the smile faded instantly. She shook her head decisively. "I'm sorry Spike…" She stood up quickly. "You're still a vampire and even though I don't want to kick you out of my life completely, I'm very sure that I'm not ready to have a relationship with…"

"A vampire." Spike finished unnecessarily.

"I'm sorry." Joy walked away from him, grabbing Dawn's hand as she passed her and pulled her away from the dance floor. "I've got to shut down our girls' night out Dawn…" Joy stated simply as she led the way out to the car.

"What's wrong?" Dawn asked as she climbed into the passenger seat obediently.

"I can't be around him right now." Joy informed her friend. Dawn nodded her understanding and turned up the radio as they drove away from the Bronze. "I'm going to drop you off at home and then go patrol for a bit. Would you mind telling Buffy where I'm at? She can take the night off."

"Take me with you!" Dawn pleaded. "Just for one night!"

"Absolutely not!" Joy shook her head. "Buffy's mad enough at me right now!"

"Come on! Buffy never even has to know!" Dawn continued to beg as Joy neared the graveyard.

"Nope. Not tonight Dawn." Joy decided, speeding up until she had safely passed the cemetery and reached the Summers' house. "Out." She ordered. Dawn sighed and slipped out of the car.

"Fine, but be safe, and don't be out too late." Dawn called as Joy put the car in reverse and backed quickly out of the driveway, waving reassuringly toward Dawn.

Joy figured that patrol would help to calm her down that night, as fighting always seemed to do for her, and Buffy as well. She found herself being pleased as a group of vampires approached her, eager for the challenge. However, the fight ended up being a little harder then she had anticipated, mostly due to the fact that her mind was muddled with her emotions and thoughts about Spike and the relationship that he seemed so desperate to form with her.

The leader of the small band of vampires was unusually large, in both height and width, and much stronger then the ordinary vampire. He was bulky but swift and Joy had a very difficult time pinning him down to one place so she could stake him. It took her almost twenty minutes before she could even get a good punch at him. His backup vampires were simply watching in the slayer fighting with mocking glares and eager criticisms. As the large vampire lunged at her and managed to knock her to her feet, the group of vampires cheered and whistled for their leader.

Joy grimaced as a sharp pain shot through the back of her head when she landed on a marble headstone. After a split-second blackout Joy managed to roll over just in time to avoid the piece of broken marble that the vampire attempted to launch at her head. She pushed herself up to her feet and unconsciously allowed herself to briefly wish that Spike was there beside her. That moment of wavering thoughts was all that the vampire needed to knock Joy off her feet again.

"I thought the Slayer was supposed to be tough." The vampire mocked as Joy collapsed, trying to blink away the black spots that had appeared in her vision as her head once again hit something hard. She was surprised she still had consciousness.

I am tough. Joy thought to herself angrily as she pushed herself up to her feet and instantly jump-kicked the vampire hard in the chest.

He staggered backwards but caught himself and as Joy took a moment to feel for any signs of bleeding where she felt pain at the base of her skull, the annoying vampire threw the other half of the broken headstone at her, which caught her hard in the stomach and sent her flying backwards until the trunk of a tree stopped her. Joy whimpered as she slumped to the ground. She had never been so easily beaten in a fight but she couldn't seem to gain any momentum tonight.

The vampire approached and loomed over her, sneering viciously. "I've always wondered how it'd be to have myself a helpless little slayer…" He licked his lips, or rather, his fangs.

Before Joy had any chance to retort, she heard a familiar voice speak up from the shadows behind the tree. "You're going to pay for that one mate…"

"Spike…" Joy felt a relieved smile cross her face as she witnessed the bleached-blonde vampire lunge at her attacker and dust him within seconds, instantly turning to the rest of the group who had just been waiting for their leader to be destroyed so they could play.

Just the sight of Spike seemed to have given Joy an extra boost of motivation that was enough to pull her to her feet and gave her the energy she needed to help Spike finish off the rest of the gang.

In under ten minutes Spike and Joy were surrounded by small piles of dust. Spike glanced at Joy with a victorious grin which was quickly replaced by one of the most melancholy expressions that Joy had ever seen him use. He turned and started to automatically walk away from her.

"Spike…" Joy called out to him before had a chance to disappear into the darkness.

He paused briefly and turned back to her with a shrug. "I was just trying to help. You were a bit off your game Gidget." He seemed to instantly assume that she wanted to argue with him for helping her.

She caught up to him quickly but slowed when she was still a couple of feet away from him. "Umm…I should have been able to handle them…" Her eyes flickered briefly to the ground, and then to the trees, and then up to the starry sky. She was looking everywhere except at Spike. She couldn't bring herself to look at him, because she knew what she would feel if she did…

"Look, I'm not trying to lecture, I just wanted to make sure you were all right…" Spike shook his head. "Forget it, I'll stay out of your way from now on."

"Spike!" Joy's eyes connected with his just before he tried to move away again and without any thought about what she was doing Joy's arms wrapped tightly around his neck and she pulled him down for a deep kiss.

Spike pushed her back in shock. "What are you doing?"

"I don't know!" Joy whined as she pulled her hands away from him and tensely pulled her fingers through her long hair.

"What about all that stuff you were saying earlier?" Spike took a step backwards uncertainly as he watched Joy nervously shift her weight between feet. "What about you not being ready for a relationship with a vampire and all that…"

"I don't know what I'm doing Spike…" Joy cut him off quickly. "I just…" She sighed. "All I know is that I can't get you out of my head, and well, I think that's sort of dangerous, considering how poorly I was fighting…" During her ranting she didn't notice the slight, satisfied smile that had crept onto Spike's face. "But…"

"But…" Spike urged.

"Look, I might not be entirely comfortable with what you are, but then again I'm not really comfortable with what I am yet…" Joy decided with a slight shrug. "I don't know what I'm getting myself into here but, I can't help it…"

"Joy, I don't want you to feel pressured into anything. I know you're nervous about me being a vampire and all so…" Spike was trying to be so understanding but Joy knew he didn't exactly realize what she was so afraid of.

She shook her head. "Spike, I want to be with you. I am not sure about too many things right now in my life, but I am sure that I want to be with you."

"But I'm a vampire and you're a slayer…"

Joy shook her head again and then gazed deeply into his eyes. "You're just a boy and I'm just a girl and all we want is to be together…" Spike's mouth dropped open hopefully. "And I can't think of a reason enough for us not to have what we want."

"Are you sure?" Spike asked in a soft voice, as if afraid she would change her mind.

Joy took a deep breath and then nodded firmly. "I've never been more sure of anything in my life!"

Spike didn't ask again. He knew that she meant it and he honestly couldn't remember the last time that he had felt so thrilled. His arms circled her waist and he lifted her into the air easily, hugging her tightly.

This is the right thing to do. Joy told herself as she let Spike spin her around. She was perfectly content and at the moment it seemed as thought nothing bad would ever happen to her again.


	39. Chapter Thirty Nine

_Wow, Okay, I know it's been like a century since I've updated this story but I sort of hit a roadblock! I'm over it now though, and I actually have many many ideas for the next couple of chapters so I hope I get a lot of reviews to encourage me to keep on writing! I'm still excited for this story, even though I've been neglecting it! Please review with suggestions, comments, etc. XOXOXO _

Chapter Thirty-Nine: Desperate for Secrecy

"I can't believe how long it took for this to happen!" Spike drawled contentedly, resting his cheek against the top of Joy's head.

"Well it probably would have happened earlier if you hadn't lied to me for so long." Joy stated. She wasn't angry though. She was just telling him the facts and making sure that he knew she had forgiven him. "But I have always heard that the wait makes the end more rewarding…"

"Oh yea? How rewarding?" Spike tightened his arms around Joy's slender waist and pressed his hips close to hers.

Joy shook her head and moved away from him, very slightly and very briefly before letting him pull her close again. "Not that rewarding Spike." She dropped her head on his shoulder and wrapped her arms tighter around his neck. "You know the rules."

"I know." Spike agreed, kissing her forehead. "And I am absolutely fine with waiting."

"Which I appreciate…" Joy smiled.

"However long you need I will be waiting. In fact I'm not even waiting. I'm just happy with what we have now. I don't need anything more!"

"Really? You're not just saying that are you?" Joy knew that it was pointless to ask. They had already been through this conversation, a few times, and Spike had made it very clear from the beginning that he was perfectly content with a non-sexual relationship until Joy was ready, if she ever was. He had assured her that he was just happy being with her that he didn't need any more from her. Of course she had her doubts that he was being completely honest, but she wasn't going to argue with him. She wouldn't make him wait forever, just until she was comfortable having that sort of relationship again. Her last few experiences didn't have the best endings, and now that she finally had a boyfriend that made her happy again, she didn't want to lose him!

"You know Joy, we're going to have to tell them eventually." Spike spoke up suddenly, disrupting her thoughts.

"Now why'd you have to do that?" Joy sighed.

"Do what?"

"Spoil the moment like that!" Joy explained with a frustrated eye roll. "I was perfectly happy not facing reality thank you!"

"Sorry…but seriously Joy, Buffy's not an idiot. An irritating bint, definitely, but not an idiot." He grinned. "She will figure it out eventually, you know?"

"I know, but we can pretend that it won't be soon, right?" Joy asked hopefully.

"Yea Gidget, we can pretend." Spike agreed with a playful kiss.

"Okay, we should probably start actually patrolling now. We've been out here for almost an hour and we haven't killed anything yet." Joy shrugged. "I'm sort of having withdrawals."

"From killing? Should I be worried?" Spike frowned.

"No, just a good fight." Joy smiled. "You know how I like my fights."

"Well, I could criticize how little you are and we could have a fight…" He winked mischievously and started nuzzling her ear. "And then after we could make up…that's always the best part you know!" He started leaving kiss trails down her neck to her bare shoulder.

"Hey now…" Joy giggled. "I'm trying to work here! You're distracting me."

"I can't help it! You're just so adorable!" Spike grinned. "I could just eat you up…" He straightened up suddenly realizing what he had said. "I mean…umm…you're very cute Gidget…"

"It's okay Spike, I know what you meant." Joy sighed. "Don't worry about it. I'm working hard to trust you remember? So I'm not going to jump on every little thing you say. It's the only way that we're going to be able to make this relationship work. We have to ignore certain little things about each other…like I'll have to ignore that you're a vampire and you'll have to ignore that umm, I'm a slayer for example…" She shrugged. "We'll make it work. I am very confident."

"Well, I'm glad you feel that way love. If you're sure, then I'm sure." He motioned towards the trees where a group of vampires were creeping towards them. "Here comes your fight!"

"Oh good!"

"Okay tonight's fight wasn't half as exciting as the one I was hoping for!" Joy whined as she half-dragged Spike towards the Bronze. "I need more excitement for tonight before I'll be ready to go home and face Buffy!"

"Right, this whole fight thing is getting tiring Gidget! Every weekend when we finally get to spend time together, alone, you're so anxious for a decent fight that I can't enjoy our date!" Spike complained.

"I'm sorry sweetheart, but I can't have a good fight when I patrol with Buffy! She's too attached to her 'quick-kills' and all I can do is stake the thing and turn to another." She shrugged. "I'll try to be better from now on though! I promise! Now, do you want to come and dance with me or am I going to have to find someone else to entertain me tonight?"

"Don't you dare let someone else dance with you!" Spike insisted. He took charge and led her by the hand into the club, immediately bringing her to the dance floor.

"Well I suppose this makes up for the lack of a decent fight." Joy grinned and situated her hands around Spike's neck.

"Yea well, I do my best to keep you happy precious!" Spike's hands snaked down her back and slipped into the back pockets of her low-riding jeans. "So, when are we going to tell the others?"

"Come on Spike, not again!" Joy rolled her eyes and stood on tiptoes to kiss Spike. Without him leaning forward to kiss her back she could only reach his chin. "Spike! I'll tell her soon, I swear! You just have to let me do it on my own time and in my own way, okay?"

Spike sighed and stopped dancing momentarily. "But I get the feeling that you don't want anyone to know…"

"Well, sure, in a way I'd rather that nobody knew for a while, but not because I'm embarrassed or anything, but just because well…they're not going to take it so well!" Joy tightened her hold around his neck. "Come on baby, don't be mad at me!"

"I'm not mad Joy…" Spike forced a smile but pulled away from her slightly and lit up a cigarette.

"I thought we were going to dance." She stuck out her lip in a pout.

"Stop trying to flirt with me Joy. I'm not in the mood."

"Fine." Joy's pathetic pout turned into a glare and she plucked the cigarette out of his fingers and placed it between her own lips. "I don't need you." She decided, moving away from him and swaying her hips to the music's upbeat tempo without the companionship of her date.

Spike watched her lustfully as she let her eyelids drop and her arms drift languidly above her head, crossing at the wrists and flicking to the beat. Her hips started to sway enticingly and Spike found it becoming difficult to refrain from reaching out to her for much longer. She opened her eyes briefly and glanced at him to make sure that he was watching her before she turned around, showing him her back, and continued to twist and dance seductively along with the music.

"It should be a crime for someone as hot as you to be dancing alone!" A young man stepped up in front of Joy and reached for her hands with a very forward and flirtatious manner. "Care if I join you?" He didn't seem to care very much about what she thought, and Joy didn't even have time to answer before the impertinent man was pressing his body close to her own and tangling his fingers with hers.

"Umm…well…actually…" Joy was snapped out of her hypnotic dance mood abruptly and the young man's presence had startled her. "I'm actually…" Her eyes darted around, searching for Spike but he had disappeared from his guard behind her.

"You _are_ alone, aren't you?" The guy followed Joy's eyes and she had to nod.

"I guess I am now…" But before the guy had a chance to settle into too close of a dancing position with Joy they were interrupted by Spike who had approached mysteriously from behind Joy and was now towering over the intruder with a fierce glare darkening his usually bright eyes.

"Actually, she's not alone…" He growled viciously.

Joy tried to hide the pleased grin spreading across her lips as the young guy cowered away from Spike's overwhelming presence. She shrugged casually at the guy as he fled from the couple and then turned to Spike.

"I thought you weren't in the mood for me tonight!" Joy teased. She took a drag on the cigarette and bit her lip flirtatiously.

"Oh come off it Gidget!" Spike sighed and took the cigarette back. "You know I'm always in the mood for you!" He returned his hands protectively around her waist and she placed one hand on his arm while using the other to share the cigarette with him.

"Good, because he wasn't very cute at all!" Joy laughed and shook out her hair as Spike easily matched his hips movements with hers. They always danced well together. They're passion seemed to guide their movements.

"I don't know why we're bothering to stop here! We should continue patrolling and get it over with!" Buffy complained as she followed Angel over to the bar at the Bronze.

"Oh yea, I forgot that you've got soldier boy keeping the bed warm for you…" Angel sneered.

"Stop it Angel. When I agreed to let you patrol with me you promised that there would be no discussions about my personal life." Buffy reminded him angrily. "I have accepted that you are in Joy's life, but that doesn't mean that you have to be in mine."

Angel grunted in response. "You make the rules princess."

"Do you see her anywhere?" Buffy asked, scanning the crowded room for the younger slayer.

"No. I thought she might be blowing off some steam here, but I guess not. We can go now if you want."

"She drives me crazy!" Buffy exclaimed. "She's never where she says she's going to be! And she's always disappearing when we're supposed to meet for patrol!"

"I thought you gave her Wednesday and Friday nights off though?" Angel pointed out.

"Well yea, but usually she comes home after school on Wednesdays and then I can at least make sure that she's alright. She didn't check into today!"

"She's not your sister, Buffy. She's allowed to be responsible for her own actions and make her own choices…"

"I don't need a lecture from you Angel!" Buffy glared. "I know that she's a grown-up and allowed to live her own life. I've just been a little worried about her lately. She's been so mysterious lately and I'm not so sure what she's up to…"

"Well, have you ever thought that it might not be any of your business?" Angel winked and Buffy sighed, shaking her head.

"Oh god, can't he at least try to keep his whores to a minimum?" Buffy exclaimed.

"Excuse me?" Angel didn't follow her irritated statement.

"Spike! He's over there with one of his hoes flaunting her like a knock-off Gucci bag!"

"Okay…" Angel frowned but noticed where she was staring at Spike dancing very closely with a short blonde. They were sharing a cigarette.

"That's disgusting!" Buffy scrunched up her nose at the display, but her scowl quickly turned into shock. "Joy!" The girl had turned around and now it was obvious to Angel and Buffy who Spike was dancing with. His hands were exploring her body, moving smoothly up and down her flat stomach and sliding along her exposed neck and up her bare arms. Her arms wrapped backwards around his neck, and her eyes closed as she leaned her head against his chest.

"I knew something was going on with them!" Angel exclaimed. He rushed towards the oblivious couple and interrupted their bliss harshly. "What do you think you're doing?" He pulled Spike away from her.

"Angel!" Joy gasped as they were joined by Buffy who was every bit as enraged as Angel.

"Are you insane Joy?" Buffy accused furiously.

"Buffy, stop! This is none of your business. What right do you think you have to tell me who I can and can't date?"

"Date?" Buffy exclaimed. "You're dating him!"

Joy clamped her mouth shut a moment too late. She had already let it slip and there was no way to take it back. She glanced at Spike desperately but he didn't seem too concerned about her divulging the secret at last. He looked at Buff and shrugged.

"If you want to fight about this Slayer, fight with me. Not with her." Spike insisted.

Buffy glared at him. "Stay out of this Spike."

"Why? It concerns me just as much as it does her. If you've got a problem with one of us then you've got a problem with both of us!" Spike argued.

"What, are you joined at the hip?" Buffy scowled. "Joy we're going home now." She grabbed the younger slayer's wrist and forced her towards the door to leave the club.

"Buffy! I'm not ready to leave yet!" Joy complained, struggling against Buffy's grip and turning to say goodbye to Spike with her eyes. The vampire had remained behind with Angel who was determined to help Buffy in keeping the couple away from each other at the moment. You can't control me like this!"

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Actually Joy, I do have a bit of control over you, considering you are a minor in my custody, so to speak, and you're a slayer in training, my training, and I do not approve of Spike for you…"

"You're all talk Buff." Joy accused, reluctantly following Buffy out to the car and climbing in the passenger seat to allow Buffy to drive her home. "You didn't have a problem with Spike when you were screwing him!"

"So what? Is that all this is? You're just screwing him and then it'll be over? Well that makes me feel a whole lot better!"

"No!" Joy exclaimed. "That's not what this is!" She shook her head and thought carefully about her next choice of words. "We haven't slept together Buffy."

Buffy was silent momentarily. "Oh…well I just assumed…"

"Of course you did." Joy sighed. "You just automatically assumed that Spike could only be interested in me for sex!"

Buffy drove silently. "It's not that I think of you like that…but Joy…I warned you about him! I just don't want you to get hurt okay? He'll only be a distraction to your training!"

"And that's obviously all that you care about! My damn training! As long as I'm not screwing up your needs for me as a slayer then you don't give a hell about any other part of my life!"

"That's not true…" Buffy hesitated as she pulled the car into the driveway and parked.

"Whatever Buff. Don't sweat it. I'm used to people not caring about my personal life." Joy jumped out of the car and rushed towards the front door, leaving Buffy alone in the car, frustrated and confused. She pushed open the front door and let it slam angrily. Joy headed directly towards the stairs.

"Joy! Thank god!" Dawn exclaimed from where she was reclining on the couch in the living room with textbooks scattered around her on the floor. "I've been waiting for you to get home so you can distract me!"

Joy glanced at her briefly and then continued up the steps. "It's been a long night Dawn…"

"Wait a minute!" Dawn leapt off the couch and raced up the stairs after her friend. "What's wrong?"

"Well…Buffy sort of knows about me and Spike now!" Joy sighed and flopped onto her bed.

Dawn shut the bedroom door and gasped. "You finally told her! Good!"

"Actually, I didn't really tell her…" Joy bit her lip. "Buffy and Angel sort of ran across me and Spike dancing at the bronze…"

"Uh-oh…" Dawn couldn't help grinning as she imagined the confrontation in her mind. "I bet that didn't go over very well!"

"Yea, not exactly."

"I'm sorry Joy, but really you shouldn't have kept it a secret from Buffy for so long!"

"Okay, I seem to remember you being on my side when Spike and I decided not to tell anyone for a while! You said it was for the best! What was all that shit about?" Joy frowned.

"Well…now that Buffy knows, and since she found out about it like she did, it might seem like you were sort of hiding it from her or something…"

"We were hiding it from her!"

"Yea, but you probably didn't want her to know that." Dawn pointed out. "It'll just make you look guilty."

"Whatever." Joy shook her head. "There's nothing I can do about it now! She knows, the games up."

"Well, maybe it's good that she knows. Now you and Spike don't have to sneak around anymore. You can just be honest with Buffy!" Dawn pointed out.

"I guess that's true…but this is just not how I expected it to be! I was so excited to finally be happy in a relationship, and I wanted to be able to share it with the people that are the most important in my life…" Joy stopped herself.

"Who would that be?" Dawn asked with a grin.

"Well…you, obviously, and Angel, and well I guess Buffy…"

"Joy, you know you have my blessing! I was on your side from the beginning. And I'm sure Angel supports you both, or at least I'm sure he will eventually. He cares a lot about you and even if he doesn't necessarily approve of your relationship he will support whatever decision you make because that's what friends do." Dawn smiled.

"Don't you have some studying to do or something?" Joy rolled her eyes.

"Are you trying to get rid of me?" Dawn sighed. "Fine. Sit up here and pout, but if you need to talk about anything I'll be downstairs, slaving over Biology. I'm failing, in case you didn't know. See not everyone can be as smart as you and get as good of grades as you do…"

"Shut up! I don't always get good grades, I just do my homework and occasionally show up to class!"

"Well, I guess the teachers really like you then or something, because you don't have a 'D' in any of your classes!"

"True." Joy shrugged. "I guess I am just smarter then you!"

"You're mean. Maybe I shouldn't be on your side in the whole Spike situation!"

"It's not a 'Spike situation' Dawn!" Joy whined. "He's my boyfriend! It's a relationship!" She rolled of the bed and changed out of her club clothes. "Buffy's opinion doesn't matter. Spike and I will manage even with her prejudice."

"Well, good luck!" Dawn left the room, leaving Joy alone to brew in her depression.

_I can't believe Buffy's being so unreasonable! I mean sure she warned me about getting involved with him, but ultimately she had to realize that it was my decision. I want to be with him and there's nothing she can do about it! _Joy slid beneath her sheets and squeezed her eyes shut tightly as though trying to change the events of the evening.

A tapping on the windowpane forced her to open her eyes and sit up in bed. Spike was crouched on the slanted roof outside of her bedroom window, bracing his body against the tree and rapping softly on the window. She slipped out of bed and hurried over to the window.

"Spike, what are you doing here?" She asked eagerly as she opened the window and stepped back, allowing him to enter her room.

"Well, I was a little worried after you left with Buffy…" He didn't greet her with the usual hug and kiss, and actually looked a little awkward.

"Why?"

"It's obvious that she wasn't exactly thrilled to find out about us, and well, I know she doesn't have the best opinion of me and I was afraid of what she'd say to you…I thought that she might…"

"What? Talk me out of my feelings for you?" Joy tried not to smile at her boyfriend's genuine concern. "Spike, I don't care what happened took place between you and Buffy, and nothing she says will change my mind about us."

"Really?" Spike's expression instantly relaxed. "Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure! Since when have I let someone else make up my mind for me?" Joy laughed. "I didn't realize you would be so worried about all this!" She paused. "You don't think that's why I didn't tell her earlier, do you? Because I didn't want her to make me change my mind?"

Spike's silence was enough of an answer.

"Oh my god! No, Spike! That wasn't it at all! I just knew that she'd be angry, and do everything she could to tear us down, and for the first time in a while I was truly happy! I didn't want anything dragging my excitement down!" She shook her head. "But I never thought about her causing us to break up!"

"Okay…" Spike didn't seem completely convinced.

"Honestly! Nobody could make me break up with you, except for you!" She rambled on quickly. "And I hope you don't ever give me a reason to break up with you…I mean not ever because that's a really long time…but I mean…"

"I know what you mean…" Spike grinned and pulled her into his arms for a reassuring hug. "I hope I don't ever give you a reason to break up with me either!"

"Well, I'm glad we're on the same page then!" Joy giggled as he kissed her deeply. "Okay…stop! I can't do this right now! If Buffy found you here…"

"I thought you didn't care what Buffy thought!"

"I don't, but she's already mad enough with me! I don't need her to hate me any more right now! I have to live with her remember?" Joy broke out of his embrace. "You should go…"

"Fine…but can I see you tomorrow?" He started back out of the window.

"Of course! I'll meet you at the cemetery at ten!" Joy glanced nervously towards the bedroom door. "Wait! How did Angel take it?"

Spike shrugged. "Typically. He threatened me a bunch, you know said he'd stake me personally if I hurt you…the usual!"

"Well, I guess that means he doesn't hate me!"

"No way! Peaches couldn't hate you Gidget! You're like his baby sis or something. It's strange how much he cares about protecting you actually…" Spike shook his head and once again perched carefully on the roof. "Do I at least get a kiss goodbye?"

Joy grinned and stuck her head out of the window to kiss him. "Goodbye!"


	40. Chapter Forty

Chapter Forty: Angelic Assassin

"Joy, you can't ignore me forever!" Buffy followed the young slayer out the door the next morning as the girls prepared to leave for school. Joy had remained silent all through the morning and now she was trying to escape the house without talking to Buffy at all. "We live together and we patrol together and we're going to have to talk eventually!"

"Not about my boyfriend!" Joy insisted bluntly.

"Well, yea actually, that's something we're going to have to talk about. Come on Joy! You're _boyfriend_! It's Spike! He's a vampire!" Buffy exclaimed.

"That never seemed to stop you!" Joy retorted.

Dawn was standing on the porch witnessing the interaction between her sister and her best friend and at this comment she had to turn away so Buffy wouldn't see her laughing.

"We're not talking about me right now Joy…"

"Oh that's right, I forgot. We never talk about Buffy's life. She's a 'non-topic' but we can talk about me as much as you like! Because my life is open to any sort of scrutinizing that you want!" Joy shook her head. "Yea, sorry it doesn't work like that. For once I'm going to keep my life private. Have a good day Buff."

Buffy gasped at Joy's firmness and stared after the girls as they hurried out to Joy's car and drove away.

_Fine. If she won't talk to me then I'll find someone who will. _Buffy slammed the door and headed immediately to the cemetery.

"Spike!" She pounded on the door to his crypt for a moment before kicking it open and barging in on the vampire who had to scramble away from the sunlight that streamed through the open door.

"Bloody hell slayer!" Spike barked at her as he cowered in one of the darker corners of his crypt. "What do you want?"

"I need to talk to you." Buffy closed the door politely and stood in front of Spike with her hands on her hips, trying her best to appear tall even though he was still a couple of inches above her.

"Look Slayer, you don't have a say in my life anymore. Actually, you never did. So I really don't think we have anything to talk about…"

"Spike! Think about what you're doing! Think about what you're going to put her through. Hasn't she been through enough in her life without your broody seduction thrown into the fray?"

"Broody seduction?" Spike almost grinned. "I think I like that…"

"Spike! She's only sixteen!" Buffy spat out.

"Well you were only sixteen when you lost your virginity to Angel, weren't you?"

"That's so none of your business!" Buffy glared. "You know what I'm talking about. She's young and she's had a hard enough life without having to worry about the complications of having a relationship with a vampire, particularly you!"

"Hey!" Spike frowned. "What makes me so much worse then any other vampire? Like Angel…"

"Angel has a soul!"

"If I hear one more word about that bastard's bloody soul…" Spike shook his head and turned his back on Buffy moving over to the trap door that led down to his living quarters.

"Don't walk away from me Spike!" Buffy grabbed his arm. "I need to know what the hell you were thinking when you began this absurd relationship!"

"Why are you blaming me? A relationship is not one-sided you know!"

"In this case, I wouldn't doubt it…"

"Buffy stop!" Spike turned on her with barred teeth. "I realize that I am not the ideal boyfriend that you might imagine for your miniature slayer, but what we decide to do with our lives is between me and her! Not you! I have feelings for her that you can only pretend to share with your soldier boy!"

"I just have trouble believing your intent Spike…"

"Why should you? I have done nothing to hurt her and I never would!" Spike insisted in a low voice. "Despite what you believe about me Buffy I care a great deal about her…"

"Well a while ago you were telling me the same thing…" Buffy murmured.

"Buffy, we're not getting into that. We both know what our relationship was…"

"Oh really? What a fling?"

"Sex Buffy. And don't act like you don't know it! All we had was a sexual relationship. You used me just like I used you!" Spike reminded her.

She sighed and nodded slowly. "Fine. So how do I know you aren't going to have the same thing with her and then just cast her aside? She's not in the same place that I was Spike! I wanted to use you! It helped me deal with my problems. She wants a real relationship…"

"I know what she wants. It's exactly what I want!" Spike hadn't meant to be so honest with Buffy but once it was out he couldn't take it back. "Don't look at me like that Buffy…I care a lot about her. It's been quite a while since I can remember having these sort of feelings about anyone!"

Buffy didn't answer for a moment. She didn't know what to say. A part of her hated him for what he was but at the same time she didn't feel that he was making up his feelings for Joy. She sighed. "Don't hurt her Spike. She doesn't need another idiot coming in and screwing up her life right now!"

"I know Buffy." Spike replied softly. "I need you to trust me on this one. I don't want to hurt her…"

Buffy nodded. "I don't think you do. But the problem is, I don't think you can always control your actions. She's a delicate girl, and you are still a vicious vampire…"

"I know what I am, and so does she." Spike hung his head. "We don't need you to make it harder for us then it already is."

"Fine. But if you hurt her…"

"I won't!"

"But if you do…"

"You have my permission to do whatever you feel fit."

Buffy almost smiled. "Is that a promise?"

"Absolutely."

"Alright." Buffy finally gave up; at least for the moment. She realized that she wouldn't be able to talk Spike into ending the relationship with Joy, the same as she realized that she wouldn't be able to talk Joy into ending the relationship with Spike. And so for the time being she would have to settle and just watch them both carefully and make sure that Spike treated the young slayer as she should be treated.

"Dawn I'm worried…"

"Why? I thought you decided that you didn't what Buffy thought!" Dawn deposited her school bag into the backseat of Joy's car before climbing into the passenger seat.

"I don't care what Buffy thinks…but it's Angel…" Joy settled into the driver's seat and started the car. "I wanted to tell him earlier, but after all his warnings I was afraid of his reaction! But I never wanted him to find out at the same time as Buffy! He deserved better then that from me, especially after all he's done for me!"

"I'm sure he understands why you didn't tell him earlier, Joy!" Dawn shrugged. "Angel has always been very understanding in difficult situations!"

"I know…he's amazing like that…but I just feel bad. I don't want him to think that I didn't want to tell him or something…" Joy sighed. "I trust him with my life Dawn! I just want to be sure that he knows that!"

"Well, maybe you should go talk to him." Dawn suggested. "I can wait in the car if you want to go now."

"Maybe that'd be best…" Joy directed the car towards Angel's apartment. "I won't be very long. I just want to see him and make sure that he doesn't hate me…"

"I'm sure he doesn't hate you…"

"I hope you're right."

Only a few minutes later Joy parked the car outside of Angel's place and left Dawn with the radio on while she ran up the stairs and knocked nervously on the door. He didn't answer immediately so she knocked again.

"Angel! It's me! Can I talk to you for a minute?" She called through the door, assuming that he was sleeping like usual for that time of day. "Angel?" She knocked harder but he still didn't answer. It wasn't normal for him to be gone in the middle of the day. He wouldn't be able to go outside without bursting into flames…so unless he had stayed somewhere else overnight…she knocked once more before glancing over her shoulder and giving the doorknob a firm jostle and forcing the door open. "Angel?" The apartment was dark and completely silent. "Are you here?" She flipped on the light switch and instantly moved into the bedroom to check the bed. It was empty. It appeared as though nobody had slept in it the previous night either.

_Where would he spend the night? It's not like he has some secret girlfriend…or does he? _Joy frowned at the thought. _Well, I suppose it's possible! I mean, I sort of had a secret boyfriend…_

"Angel!" She called again as she quickly searched the rest of the house just to make sure that he was not home. When she was satisfied with the search she returned to the car to debate the situation with Dawn.

"Do you think he's with Spike?" Dawn suggested.

"I doubt it. From what Spike said last night, Angel wasn't exactly thrilled with him!" Joy decided.

"You saw Spike last night? After you and Buffy left the Bronze?" Dawn questioned.

"Oh, yea, he came to my window." Joy smiled. "He just wanted to make sure that I was okay after talking to Buffy. It was very sweet…"

"I'm sure it was." Dawn rolled her eyes. "Maybe Buffy knows where he is."

"Yea, she might." Joy agreed, quickly heading towards their house, suddenly very eager to talk to Buffy. It wasn't normal for Angel to be missing in the middle of the afternoon. Then again, she hadn't stopped to visit him in the afternoon since she had become involved with Spike. She just hadn't really found the time. _Maybe he is mad at me! _Joy panicked and increased her speed.

"Don't forget that Buffy's at the Magic Box today…" Dawn mentioned quietly. Joy had to turn the car around and she pulled a dangerously speedy U-turn.

The second they had pulled up in front of the store Joy was out of the car and sprinting into the store, calling out for Buffy.

"What's the matter Joy?" Willow was searching through the books at the front of the store with the young slayer came flying into the shop. Dawn was close behind her.

"Where's Buffy?" Joy demanded.

"In the back, training, of course!" Willow smiled. "Is there anything I can help you with?"

"I need to talk to her about something…" Joy hurried to the back room but stopped just outside the door when she heard loud voices coming from inside.

"I just wish she had talked to me about this earlier!" Buffy was saying.

"Buffy, have you ever considered that Joy is not always comfortable discussing her entire life with you?" Giles replied.

"But Giles, she's living with me and we're working together against all the evil…I thought that would sort of give us some kind of bond you know? I at least thought she might open up to me a little…" Buffy complained.

"Buffy, you have never been bothered by her wishes for privacy before…" Giles continued. "Perhaps this sudden irritation is simply because of her dating choice?"

"Giles! You can't seriously be approving Joy's decision to date Spike? You hate Spike!" Buffy exclaimed.

"Of course I believe that Joy could have chosen herself a better match for a serious relationship, but it is her decision to make and we must respect that. I am sure that her adjustment to life with us had not been easy and if she has found a hint of happiness with…whoever…then I think she deserves it." Giles decided firmly.

"Okay, since when are you so calm about a slayer dating a vampire?"

"Well, I learned my lesson trying to break up you and Angel." Giles explained.

"Oh sure, now you've learned!" Buffy seemed like she was finally giving up on the conversation and Joy prepared to enter the room. "Just don't expect me to ever give them my blessing!"

Joy rolled her eyes and pushed open the door. "Buffy, where's Angel?"

"Good afternoon Joy, have you been here long?" Giles asked with a slight hint of concern in his voice.

"No, I just got here." Joy lied quickly. "Buffy have you seen Angel since we left the Bronze yesterday?"

Buffy shook her head. "No, I left him there and haven't seen him at all today. I'm sure he'll come around the cemetery tonight during patrol. Do you need something?"

Joy shrugged. "I'm just sort of worried…I feel like I should have told him earlier about me and Spike and I'm afraid he might be mad at me…"

"There's a good possibility…" Buffy muttered.

"I went to his apartment after school but he's not there!" Joy explained quickly. "I don't know where else he would be! He never goes out during the day because of the sunlight, obviously, and I don't know where else he would have stayed last night!"

"I'm sure he's fine, Joy!" Giles assured the worried young slayer. "He's quite capable of taking care of himself."

"I know he is, but I would just feel better if I knew where he was…" Joy explained. "I guess I'll see him tonight…" She shook her head. "I'm going to take Dawn home and then I think I'll go over and see my boyfriend…I don't need your blessing, Buff!" Joy smirked and left the room.

"She was spying on us?" Buffy accused the second that she and Giles were alone again. Joy listened briefly and then left with a satisfied grin and Dawn in toe.

"Please stop talking to me!" Joy complained again as she coated her lips with a gloss. "I'm so tired of your lectures!"

Buffy stood behind Joy glaring into the mirror that Joy was using. "Joy, we have to talk about this sooner or later. I don't get it. Why are you so eager to make up with Angel but you'll barely even look me in the eyes?"

"Because Angel will understand, and he trusts me enough to let me make my own decisions." Joy explained.

"How do you know? He didn't seem very excited about your decision last night!" Buffy reminded her.

"I know, and that's why I need to talk to him. He was just confused, and probably a little hurt that I didn't tell him earlier…"

"Yea, I get that."

"Buffy, I'm sorry that I didn't tell you, but I knew that you wouldn't react well and I wasn't ready for that sort of complications! Our relationship has been going so well…"

"How long exactly have you two been together now?" Buffy asked suddenly.

Joy hesitated. "Umm…three weeks."

"You've been dating for three weeks? How did I not know about this?" Buffy exclaimed.

"We're really careful, and really good at hiding it!" Joy shrugged. "Are we going to patrol or not?"

"Buffy, Joy…" Dawn called from downstairs. "I think you need to come down here!" The slayers exchanged concerned frowns and raced down the stairs to the living room where Dawn was standing with Spike and Giles. Joy smiled at Spike and was briefly tempted to kiss him in front of everyone, mostly for the purpose of making them all uncomfortable, but the mood felt serious so she restrained herself.

"What's up guys?" Buffy asked.

"There's a rumor floating around tonight about a new big bad in town." Spike stated quickly. "I was out at one of the bars where demons like to hang during the sunlight hours and they were laughing about how 'screwed' the slayers are."

"Did you get any more information? Like a name…" Buffy inquired.

"No." Spike shook his head. "I'm not entirely sure that they knew what was moving in on Sunnydale, all they can tell is that the vibe is a bunch of big evil."

"Great. Just what we need." Buffy sighed. "Well I guess we should get out in town…"

"Buffy!" The front door burst open and Xander rushed into the room followed closely by Anya. "We have a serious problem!"

"What?" Joy and Buffy asked together.

"Umm…we just ran into Angel outside the magic box…" Xander started. He motioned to his girlfriend and Anya folded down the collar on her jacket. Blood was drying over two small incisions on her neck.

"What happened Anya?" Joy asked quickly.

"Umm…Angel attacked her." Xander stated.

"What?" Giles demanded.

Anya shrugged. "I don't understand it. I stopped to say hi to him while Xander locked up the store and he attacked me with full fang face!"

"I don't understand…are you sure it was him?" Joy frowned.

"Joy, I've known Angel for a lot longer then you have…I think I recognize him by now. Especially Angelus…"

"Angelus? But…" Buffy shook her head. "He can't be…there's no way he could have lost his soul…"

"Well, there's always a way…" Xander pointed out.

"Yea, but doesn't that involve him needing to achieve perfect happiness?" Joy reminded the group. They all nodded slowly. "Are you suggesting that last night Angel…did something to achieve perfect happiness and lose his soul?" She shook her head scrunched up her nose. "I kind of don't want to think about that…gross."

"Okay…well I don't care about how he lost his soul but he's not himself or else he wouldn't have attacked us, would he have?" Xander shrugged. "I've had enough experience with Angelus to know when he's back."

"Spike…" Buffy turned to him grudgingly. "Can you do some scouting for us? You'll know who to talk to…"

"Right, of course." Spike nodded and headed to the door.

"Wait, I'm coming with you!" Joy insisted, hurrying past the group.

"Joy!" Buffy rolled her eyes. "No matter how tough you are, whatever Spike's got to do is going to be easier if you are not there…"

"Buffy, stop bossing me around. I want to go with him. This is important to me, Angel is important to me…" Joy argued. "I can help…"

"Gidget baby, don't argue this okay?" Spike begged gently. Xander and Anya looked confused about Spike's tone.

"Spike, I want to come with you!" Joy insisted.

"No! What I've got to do is not your type of business." Spike argued.

"I don't care! I want to help find Angel!" Joy's voice was rising and everyone in the room was staring at her. "Spike, you can't make me stay here!"

"Joy, listen to me." Spike's voice took a very firm tone, which people rarely heard. "You are staying here and I am going to get information about Angel on my own. When I am done I will come back here directly."

"But Spike…"

"No. I mean it Joy. I know you don't like taking people's orders but this is one time where I don't bloody care what you like. Stay here."

Joy frowned but didn't have time to say anything else before he hurried out of the house and disappeared down the street. Joy watched from the doorway until he had vanished in shadows before turning back to the others.

"What the hell are you all looking at?" She demanded.

"Umm…what's going on between you two?" Xander asked carefully. Buffy made a noise sort of like an angry pig.

"Why does he think he can boss me around?" Joy asked of nobody in particular.

"Better question, why do you listen to him?" Dawn laughed. "I've never heard you take orders from anyone except for him!"

"She has a point Joy…" Willow spoke up from the doorway where she had been standing with Tara, listening in on the whole conversation. "Xander, Joy and Spike have been dating for a few weeks. Nobody knew except for Dawn, but Buffy and Angel found out last night and now we all know. Okay?"

Xander stood with his mouth open. Anya looked at Joy. "Congratulations on your new relationship. Good luck with him and I promise that I will try not to get drunk and have sex with him."

Joy frowned, bewildered by Anya's statement. "Thanks…I think." She turned to Buffy. "Now what are we supposed to do?"

"Wait." Buffy shrugged.

"Fine." Joy sunk down onto the couch and tucked her heals up beneath her body. Everyone looked at each other awkwardly, no one quite knowing how to address the situation especially since they now all knew about Joy's relationship with Spike. Dawn sat down next to Joy.

"Should we watch something on TV?" Dawn suggested.

"Maybe we could eat something…" Giles suggested.

"Or we could patrol?" Joy mentioned hopefully.

"No. I believe it would be best if we wait for Spike to return with whatever information he manages to recover." Giles decided.

Joy rolled her eyes. "Fine, I'll be in the basement working out." She stood and quickly left the others, seeking privacy and stress-relief down in the training room.

She had barely been alone for more then a half hour before she was joined by Willow who came down the stairs slowly, carefully balancing a tray loaded with a bowel of macaroni and cheese and a glass of lemonade.

"Xander cooked." She explained simply. "Everyone was getting hungry and nobody was in the mood to make anything so it was left to Xander." She shrugged and set the tray down on a chair. "I figured you might be hungry too."

"Not really." Joy shook her head and resumed her weight lifting.

"Joy you should eat something. I could make you a sandwich or something if you don't like this." Willow offered.

"I can make my own dinner Will." Joy said.

"I know." Willow smiled. "I've realized that you are very self-reliant, but sometimes it's nice to let other people help you out."

"Do you all feel that way about me?" Joy asked suddenly.

"What do you mean?"

"That all I care about is myself and I don't want to let anybody else in my life…"

"Well honey, you don't exactly seem to want any of us in your life…" Willow sighed. "We want to help you any way we can but we're all sort of afraid to come to close to you…we don't want you to resent us."

"I don't resent you guys Willow. You're the only people that have ever shown a concern about my wellbeing." Joy shrugged. "I don't mean to come off as such a bitch Will. I'm just not used to having people around who care about me…" She smiled slightly. "You guys mean a lot to me, all of you, including Angel, well especially Angel. And that's why I'm so frustrated about being locked in here unable to do anything to help him! I have to do something Willow. He is the reason that I have gotten as far as I have in life. If he hadn't come along after I lost my parents…I'm not sure if I could have made it this long." She cleared her throat and masked her face. "I need to be able to help him."

"I know how you feel sweetheart." Willow smiled. "Don't worry. You'll be able to help him. When Spike gets back we'll find out what's wrong and then you can go and play hero, okay?"

Joy smiled. "Then I guess I'll just have to be patient." She started eating the food that Willow had brought down. "Willow I feel like I should be thanking you…"

"For what?"

"You're the only person who hasn't seemed to judge me and Spike for our relationship…"

"Oh that…" Willow shrugged. "Well, I'm not sure I entirely approve of the match up, but who am I to judge who you go out with? Don't worry, the others will come around." Willow smiled. "I don't think they really knew how to react when I first told them I was gay either. Just give it time honey."

"Thanks." Joy hesitated and then leaned forward and gave the witch a brief hug.

"Wow, a hug! That's a big step for you Joy!" Willow grinned and hugged her back. "Have a good workout." Willow started back up the stairs but Joy stopped her.

"Umm…you were around last time that umm, Angel became Angelus, weren't you?" She asked nervously.

"Yea…" Willow wasn't sure what questions to expect.

"What's it like? I mean, what's he like when he's evil?"

"You don't want to know."

"Yea I do. I think I deserve to know."

"He wasn't known as the worst vampire of his day for nothing, Joy." Willow shrugged. "He's as purely evil as a creature can get. But when he's good, when he's Angel, he's almost as opposite from evil as possible, as I'm sure you've realized."

"Yea, I have." Joy nodded. She didn't want to imagine the possibility of Angel being evil. She had finally let herself trust him and now…she shook the thought out of her head. "But it's probably just a rumor right? I mean…he's probably fine…"

"Yea Joy, I'm sure Angel's fine." Willow tried to smile for the young slayer's sake.

Joy nodded and let Willow leave before placing her headphones over her ears, turning up the volume on her choice rock CD, and returning to her workout. She used the basement more often then Buffy. It was the way that she relieved stress during the daytime when she couldn't go out and find an evil creature to fight.

It was over an hour later when she was disturbed again. She had become so absorbed in her music and exercise that she hadn't even heard the ruckus upstairs of Spike returning but he came downstairs immediately so that she could be the first one to hear what he had discovered; of course everyone else had followed him though so everyone was in the basement when he touched her arm and caused her to jump in surprise.

"You're back!" She noticed everyone else and held back from showing affection. "What did you find out?" She could tell by his expression that it wasn't good news. "Spike, tell me what's going on with Angel."

"He hasn't lost his soul." Spike stated. "But something's happened to him. I found a lower-level demon who opened up quite a bit after some persuasion…there's a demon in town who's got a bit of a magical side to him, and he had concocted some sort of voodoo that has temporarily returned Angelus to the world."

There was a unified gasp from the group as they all listened to what Spike was saying. Joy was the only one who seemed hopeful.

"But you said that it was magic. So it's just a spell, right? And spells can be reversed, right? Willow, you can reverse it, can't you?" Joy rambled.

"I don't know Joy, magic that powerful…well it would have to be intense to be able to return Angelus…"

"But you're a hell of a witch Willow! Everyone here knows it! If you know what spell was used you can figure out a way to reverse it, can't you?"

"I can try…" Willow nodded. "Spike, do you know what kind of spell it was?"

Spike nodded and motioned for Willow to follow him upstairs where all the books were kept. Joy followed them with Buffy and the others right behind. With Giles and Spike helping Willow peruse through the books they had discovered a spell that should return Angel to himself, but it wouldn't be simple.

"I know it'll be difficult, but can you do it Willow?" Joy asked fearfully.

"I can try." Willow sighed. "But I will need him to be entirely unaware of what is going on or he may be able to fight it and then it won't be effective."

"Fine, we'll get him when he's feeding. Aren't vampires usually completely focused on their prey when they're feeding?" Joy asked Spike.

He was always uncomfortable when she inquired about vampire mannerisms but he answered her obligingly. "Actually no. Vampires are very distracted when they are feeding, just like anyone else, but their defenses are not entirely down."

"Then how do we get his defenses down?" Joy asked harshly.

Spike shrugged. "Well, even though he's a vampire, Angel is still like any other man…there's only one particular activity that distracts anyone, especially men, completely I think…"

"What is it…" Dawn gasped when she realized what he was referring to and silenced herself.

"Are you suggesting that someone has sex with him?" Anya asked bluntly.

Spike shook his head. "I don't think sex is necessary…" He almost seemed to be embarrassed as he spoke. "But a partially sexual or seducing act might definitely help in this situation…"

"Right, fine, so someone will seduce him and then Willow will reverse the spell." Xander shrugged. "What're we waiting for?"

The others weren't quite as confident as Xander seemed to be. Joy glanced at Spike who was staring at her quite firmly, yet she couldn't quite interpret his expression. Buffy finally spoke up.

"Fine, let's go. We'll track him and then I'll _seduce_ him or whatever and it'll be over. Okay?" She went to the weapons chest and secured a stake in her belt and a vile of holy water in her pocket.

Spike shook his head slowly. "I don't think so Buffy…"

"What do you mean? You are so not going to tell me what to do here!" Buffy retorted bitterly. "I am the most experienced with Angelus and…"

"Exactly." Spike said gently. He was afraid of offending the slayer with his choice of words. "You've had the most physical experience with Angel, and that sort of exchange…well even when he is Angelus, he'll remember the experiences he's had with you and he won't probably fall for it…"

Buffy blushed but nodded. "Right, of course, that makes sense…"

"Umm…" Xander frowned.

"I'll do it." Joy decided quickly.

"No! Absolutely not!" Buffy insisted.

"Excuse me?" Joy glared at Buffy. "This isn't your call Buffy. You can't do it because you've had sex with him before, and who else is strong enough to take care of herself around Angelus? Dawn?" She glanced at her best friend. "No offense…"

"None taken." Dawn shrugged.

"I don't like it Joy. You've never been around Angelus. You don't know what he can be like…" Buffy argued.

"We don't really have another choice." Joy took a deep breath. "You have to realize that I am willing to do whatever it takes to bring him back. It's the least I can do for him."

Spike didn't look any more comfortable with the idea then Buffy did but he slowly nodded. "She's right Buffy. She's the only one who could pull it off."

"Fine." Buffy finally gave in. "But if you feel that he is getting too out of control you have to be willing to hurt him Joy."

"I know. I'll be ready in five minutes." Joy headed up the stairs. "Spike…" she paused and called back to him. "Will you please come up here with me for a minute…"

Spike hesitated and glanced around the room full of condescending stares and then hurried up the stairs after his girlfriend. "What do you need?"

"You're okay with this right?" Joy knew that he wasn't but she hoped he would at least understand why she felt so firmly about it. "Angel would do it for me in a second."

"I know that Gidget. And that's why I'm accepting it." He forced a smile and kissed her quickly. "Just promise me you won't do anything stupid, okay? Be as safe as possible…"

"Of course I will." Joy bit her lip. "I'm not really sure what I'm going to have to do…when you said sexual…"

"I meant it. I know it's crude but he is a man. There are very few things that can fully distract a man, but physical pleasure is one of the main things. Any young girl can make a vampire want to feed, but you have to make him want to do more with you then simply use you for nutrition." He shrugged. "It really shouldn't be that hard. Angelus always did like having his share of whores."

Joy raised her eyebrows. "Oh…okay…so you want me to be a whore?"

Spike seemed taken aback momentarily but then shrugged. "If that's what it takes…" He paused. "But for a first appearance, Angelus was fond of the innocent girls. The angelic ones like Drusilla."

"Fine. I'll be downstairs in a minute. Make sure Willow's got that spell figured out perfectly. This can't fail." Joy hurried into her room and left Spike to return downstairs to help the others prepare for the complicated spell.

"Oh my god…" Dawn gasped as Joy descended the stairs almost fifteen minutes later.

"Joy, what the hell…" Buffy frowned.

"I'm doing whatever it takes Buff." Joy shrugged and self-consciously smoothed down her long straight hair. She had taken extra care to dress herself in an 'angelic' manner such as Spike had suggested, and the outcome was rather contrary to Joy's normal attire. "I borrowed some of your clothes Dawn, I hope that's alright…" Joy had chosen a white silky skirt that came just above her knees and she had borrowed a pale pink button-up cardigan sweater from Dawn.

Dawn was trying not to laugh. "You're adorable Joy!"

"Shut up." Joy rolled her eyes and readjusted the straps on the white stiletto heels she was wearing. "Are we ready to go? It _is_ a school night."

"Yea, let's go." Buffy nodded. "We are going to the cemetery which is the most reasonable place for him to be, and you will wait for him to find you and then…well…do whatever you have to do until he has become completely absorbed with you…"

"He'll bite you." Spike stated suddenly.

"What?"

"That's how you'll know. If he really does fall for you and becomes so consumed with you physically he'll bite you. He'll be thinking about changing you…" Spike dropped his eyes to the ground.

"Oh…right…okay…" Joy was a little nervous at the idea of being fed upon by a vampire, especially Angel. She'd never been bitten before.

"Well, okay…when that happens Willow will start the spell." Buffy finished. "If anything goes wrong or if you panic for a second, just attack him and that'll be the sign for us to step in. You can't be afraid to attack him if you need to Joy."

"I know." Joy sighed. "Let's go."

"Anya, will you please stay here with Dawn?" Buffy asked as she headed out the door.

"What? I want to come with!" Dawn pouted instantly.

"Absolutely not. Angelus is not safe for you to be around Dawn. Stay here with Anya and do your homework. We'll be back as soon as possible." Buffy ordered. Anya shrugged and gently held Dawn's arm.

Joy climbed into the back of Xander's car with Spike and Buffy, while Tara and Willow rode with Giles. She sat silently with her hands nervously clutched in her lap the entire drive to the cemetery. When they had parked on the side of the road and Willow and Tara had hurried ahead to scope out somewhere where they could hide and perform the spell within site of the rows of gravestones, Joy slowly exited the car and reached her hand back to Spike.

"Are you going to be okay with this Joy?" Spike asked considerately. He took her hand and squeezed it reassuringly.

She nodded. "I'll be fine. I'm just a little nervous."

"Of course you are." Xander shrugged. "You're going to be screwing around with Angelus…" He wrinkled his forehead. "I meant that in the best way…"

"Thanks for the vote of encouragement." Joy rolled her eyes. "Well, I guess I should get to it. I hope this works." She followed Buffy and Xander to where Giles and the witches were hiding behind thick bushes.

"We'll be right here and we can see everything that will go on in the cemetery. Don't worry. The second something goes wrong we'll be there to help you." Buffy tried to smile reassuringly but Joy still didn't feel very confident about what she was about to do.

"Right, thanks…" She nodded and turned towards the cemetery away from the protection of the others. "Spike…" She stopped suddenly. He was on her heels. "Don't judge me for whatever I might do…"

"I never would." In an instant Spike had pulled Joy into his arms and captured her lips in a deep kiss. The others tried to ignore it but mostly they just stared in slightly disgusted surprise.

"Okay, and off I go." Joy sighed and turned away, heading towards the cemetery. She walked into the clearing and started strolling along the rows of gravestones. She didn't know exactly what she was supposed to be doing but she hoped that Angel, or Angelus, would turn up soon. She started whistling and in a few minutes she heard footsteps and spun around to find herself face to face with Angel. "Oh! You frightened me Sir…" She pretended not to recognize him, hoping that under his spell he wouldn't recognize her either.

He stared at her with interest. "What's a pretty young thing like you doing out here all alone?"

"Waiting." Joy shrugged.

"Waiting for who?" His tone was calm but playful.

"Well, there's this boy that I like at school…" She pretended to blush and gazed at him with her bright eyes "But I don't think he likes me much because we were supposed to have a date tonight…" She sighed. "So now I'm just bored and alone…"

"Well, you wouldn't be alone or bored with me…"

"But I don't even know you!"

"My name's Angelus."

"That's a strange name…" She giggled. "But you seem nice enough. And you're very handsome…"

"Yea? Well I think you're very pretty…" Angelus flattered.

"Thank you." She smiled and then decided to take it a step further. "Nobody has ever told me that before."

"I'm shocked. You're a very beautiful girl."

"Stop, you're making me embarrassed." She didn't know how to make him want to change her but flirting seemed to be the best tactic.

"Am I?" Angelus took a step closer to her. "Well then I'd probably really make you embarrassed if I told that I really wanted to kiss you right now, huh?"

Joy didn't have to fake the blush that spread into her cheeks. "Umm…I don't know what to say…"

"I'm sorry, that was probably too forward of me. It's just, you're so beautiful, and I hate to think of a girl like you being stood up for a date…and well you did say you were bored…"

Hidden behind the bushes, watching dutifully, the Scoobies and Spike were having a difficult time containing their rising anger with Angelus.

"He always was smooth with women." Spike growled.

"Quiet! I don't want him to hear you!" Buffy whispered harshly.

"He won't be able to hear me. He's already falling for her. She's a good actress. I knew Angelus would never be able to resist an innocent girl." Spike glared as he watched Angel move closer to Joy and slowly reach his hand out towards her.

"I don't even know you…" Joy was saying. "It wouldn't be right…"

"But it could be fun! I only want to help you enjoy your night beautiful!" Angelus crooned. "Come on…"

Joy pretended to be shy and pulled back slightly. "How can I trust a stranger?"

"Don't think of a me a stranger! Let's pretend that we've known each other forever and tonight we had planned to meet…"

"I don't know…" Joy let him take her hand and pull her towards him.

"You just look so sweet…all I want to do is eat you up!" Angelus grinned but Joy felt herself tense under his grip.

"What do you want from me exactly?" Joy asked breathily.

"Whatever you will give me precious!"

"I don't know Angelus…you seem nice and I have to admit that I'm very interested…" She sighed. "But I'm a little nervous. I've never been with a man before…"

Angel's eyes grew wide and a salacious grin crept onto his face. "I promise to be gentle."

"And he's sold…" Spike murmured. "She's amazing."

"God she's a good actress!" Buffy agreed with Spike.

"You promise?" Joy finally gave into him, finally getting tired of playing games and wanting to have Angel back as soon as possible.

"I give you my word as a gentleman cupcake." Angel took both of her hands and pulled them up to his mouth and kissed them gently. Joy was amazed at how gentle he was being for such a dreaded vampire. "All I'm asking for is a kiss…"

Joy decided to throw caution to the wind and let Angel pull her into his arms and kiss her softly. She felt strange kissing Angel, the man who had for so long been like her brother, but she kept telling herself that it was to help him and tried not to think about her actions. He held her tightly and she let her hands slide up to his face. She unconsciously opened her mouth and felt Angel's tongue slip in. She gasped in surprise and pulled back quickly.

"Did I hurt you?" He asked, though clearly not concerned.

She shook her head. "I'm just a little nervous…"

"Don't be nervous. You know you want to be with me…" Angel told her passionately as he forced another kiss and she obliged by relaxing and letting him lead their actions. Within minutes she had almost forgotten what she was doing and was matching his passion with her own. "Are you sure this is your first time with a man?"

Joy smiled at him flirtatiously. "Maybe not…but if you want it to be it can be…"

"What do you mean…" Angel pulled back a little.

"I can be anything you want me to be. I can give you anything you want and fulfill your deepest fantasies!" Joy hoped she was making the right choice. "You know you want me, right?" She slipped her hands beneath his shirt and let her fingernails tickle up his chest. "Don't you?"

A pleased gleam shone in Angel's eyes and he nodded. "Oh you have no idea how much I want you!" He dropped his act of gentlemanly manners and placed his hands on her hips and lifted her up. She wrapped her legs around his waist and locked her arms around his neck; they kissed deeply.

"You're amazing…" Angel murmured into her hair as she started kissing her way around his neck and down to his collarbone.

"Thank you…" She couldn't help feeling flattered by his praise and felt even more encouraged in what she was doing. "You're not bad yourself…" She unconsciously moaned as his hand massaged its way up her back beneath her cardigan.

"How long is this going to take?" Spike grumbled and adjusted his crouched position as he watched Angel making out with his girlfriend.

"It was your idea…" Buffy reminded him. "Keep quiet."

Angel now had Joy with her back pressed up against a tree trunk and she was slowly sliding down to the ground until she was lying flat on her back with Angel straddling her.

"I like to be on top…" Joy grinned maliciously and Angel obliged by rolling over onto his back so she was balancing herself on top of him. She continued kissing his neck determined to distract him enough without him having to bite her. What she didn't realize was that while she was working on distracting him he had unconsciously managed to distract her and so she barely even noticed when he started unbuttoning her cardigan and kissing her bare stomach. She giggled from his tickling kisses and pulled his mouth back to hers. His fingers pressed hard into her hips and he rolled her over again and he slid his tongue down her neck, all the way down to her chest and then he released his fangs. Joy gasped as his teeth sunk into her chest.

"She's done it." Spike exclaimed. "Now Willow!"

Willow and Tara and Giles instantly started the spell while Buffy and Spike hurried out to stand by if something went wrong with the spell and they needed to pull Angelus off of Joy. Meanwhile he fed on her briefly and then returned to kissing momentarily before biting her again. She almost fainted from the shock of the pain but just in time the spell succeeded and Angel passed out as the evilness of Angelus started to leave him.

"Joy!" Spike hurried over and pushed Angel off of her.

"Don't touch me…please…no…no more…" She took a deep breath and fainted in his arms as he picked her up off the ground.

"Spike take her home. I'm going to stay here with Willow and Tara and make sure it worked right." Buffy ordered. Spike nodded and called for Xander to drive him back to the house. Dawn was waiting anxiously at the door with Anya.

"She seems to get hurt a lot, doesn't she?" Anya asked calmly as Spike brought the young slayer into the house.

"Anya, you're not helping." Xander told her gently.

"Spike, put her on the couch." Dawn instructed.

Spike carefully placed Joy on the couch and knelt beside her, pressing his hand to her cheek and waiting for her to wake up. She slowly stirred but when she saw him she gasped and pushed him away from her.

"Joy, what's wrong?" Spike frowned.

"Please don't touch me…" Her fingers flew to her neck and she felt the bite marks on her neck and at her chest.

"Joy, please baby…you're okay…it worked, I think…Angelus is gone…it was him who hurt you…not me…" Spike reached for her hand but she pulled away.

"Spike…I want to trust you so much…" She trembled and shook her head. "But I just don't know if can right now…"

Spike stood suddenly and moved away from her. "Dawn…come here Dawn." He called for her and she came quickly, nervous because of his serious tone. "Take care of her. You need to stop the bleeding, okay?"

Dawn nodded and Spike left the house immediately.

"What's wrong Joy? Why didn't Spike stay?" Dawn asked as she leaned over Joy with a glass of water.

Joy didn't answer but sat up and quickly buttoned up her cardigan. "I have a headache Dawn, I think I'd like to go take a bath…"

"Is everything all right?" Anya followed Joy and Dawn nervously up the stairs to Joy's private bathroom. "What happened tonight? Did something go wrong? Is Angel okay?"

"Anya, please!" Joy shook her head, completely exasperated. "Dawn, Anya, I appreciate your guys' concern but I am really just worn out." She lied expertly and shut her bathroom door before either of them could protest. She could hear them whispering in bewilderment outside the door though and she sighed. "Please! I swear I'll be fine. Just leave me alone!" Joy called through the door. The girls made angry noises but Joy could hear them leave eventually.

After locking the bathroom door, Joy slowly started the painful process of removing her clothing until she was standing before the floor-length mirror naked. Her eyes watered instinctively as she surveyed the forming bruises from where Angel had gripped her too hard, mainly on her hips, arms, and she noticed there were even a couple light marks along her upper thighs. As she inspected the bite wounds on her neck and chest, her mouth seemed strangely dry and she tried to swallow but she couldn't force herself to even draw a real breath. The incisions were deep. The dark crimson blood was beginning to clot as it dried, though small trickles of blood still dripped down her chest, running all the way down her flat, bare stomach.

Spike headed directly for the cemetery when he left the house. He didn't understand why Joy wasn't letting him near her but he had a pretty good idea whose fault it was. When he reached the cemetery he found Buffy and Giles talking at a short distance while Tara and Willow stood closer to Angel who was standing now and seemed back to his good side. Before the others could even realize he had joined them, Spike had attacked Angel. The two vampires were on the ground, Spike was holding Angel down and his teeth were visible.

"Spike!" Angel gasped as Spike punched him viciously in the jaw. His knuckles were bloody from beating against Angel's teeth but he continued to attack him.

"Spike!" Buffy rushed over and kicked hard at Spike's stomach. He flinched and she managed to pull him off of Angel. Giles and Willow helped Angel to his feet while Buffy held Spike back. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Spike, he's Angel again…Angelus is gone!" Willow told him quickly.

"I know!" Spike growled, glaring hard at Angel who seemed completely confused. "She won't let me near her! You ruined her!" He accused angrily.

Angel frowned. "What are you talking about?"

Buffy was still holding on to Spike's arm but he knocked her down quickly and lunged at Angel again. He managed to knee him hard in the stomach and knock him to the ground before Giles and Buffy pulled him back again.

"Don't piss me off Angel! You know what I'm talking about! I can't get near her! She won't let me…"

Giles spoke up. "He doesn't remember, Spike."

"What?" Spike frowned.

Giles sighed. "He doesn't remember being Angelus. The spell to bring him back erased the memory of that time. He doesn't know what you are talking about."

Angel looked nervous. "What did I do?"

Spike couldn't answer. He was too upset to think about it.

Willow slowly explained. "The only way for the spell to work was for you to be completely distracted…we decided the best way was for you to be with a girl…" Angel's eyes widened.

"You were ready to change her!" Spike stated simply.

"Shit…" Angel mumbled, understanding Spike's meaning. "Who was it?"

Spike stared firmly at Angel. "Joy."

A second later the others were still trying to figure out what had happened when Angel had started sprinting away from the cemetery towards the Summers' house.

"She won't let me near her…" He stated sadly and turned towards the direction of his crypt.

Angel reached the house only a few minutes later, he had been running the whole way. He didn't wait to knock on the door but burst in. Dawn and Anya were standing on the stairs.

"Where is she?" He demanded. They pointed upstairs blankly, staring at his bleeding nose and lip with curiosity.

She had just finished carefully wrapping her body in a towel, keeping it low enough on her chest so it didn't irritate the bite marks, when he pounded on her bedroom door.

"I told you guys I wanted to be left alone!" She sighed in exasperation.

"Joy…" Angel spoke softly, not quite sure what to say to her. "Please…I need to see you…I…I don't know what I did! I don't remember anything…"

Joy hesitated for a minute before opening the door and letting him into the room. "What happened to your face?" She asked suddenly. "I didn't do that…"

He shook his head. "Spike did…he's pretty upset and I don't even know…" He spotted the wounds on her chest and stopped. "Oh god! Joy I…"

Joy shook her head. "You weren't yourself." She shrugged. "I wanted to do it…can you turn around for a minute?" She asked as she pulled a tank top out of her dresser drawers. He obliged and she quickly pulled it over her head and then stepped into a pair of sweatpants. "Okay…"

"How can I make this up to you?" He asked quickly.

She shook her head. "There's not reason for you to…"

"I need to!" He insisted. "I know that it's effected you more then your telling me! I don't see how it couldn't really…"

"I'm fine." She lied.

"Spike says you won't let him touch you…"

Joy sighed. "Yea…"

"He's not going to hurt you! He's not evil."

"Yes he is though. You have a soul! In any normal circumstance you never would have hurt me! But Spike doesn't have anything except for a stupid chip in his head. What happens if that malfunctions and he can bite again? Why wouldn't he come after me?"

Angel shrugged. He really couldn't answer that. "He cares about you Joy."

"I know. But he's still an animal…"

"Why are you saying this all of a sudden? You used to trust him!" Angel argued.

She finally submitted to his questions. "I had a vision!" She explained, dropping onto her bed. He sat down next to her. "I had a vision when you bit me…"

He looked a little awkward. "What was it?"

"It was a little confusing, I couldn't really tell what was going on all the time, but Spike was feeding on me…"

Angel frowned. "Are you sure?"

"Yea, I'm pretty positive." She shook her head. "I had always thought I could trust him, even though everyone told me to be careful…I just let him in and now…"

"When's it going to happen?"

"I don't know." She shrugged. "It was very unclear. But I guess it didn't feel too urgent…"

"Have you told him?"

She shook her head. "He would be mad at me for not trusting him!"

"I think he deserves to know why you won't let him near you." Angel told her. "He thinks it's because of what I did to you."

Joy sighed. "You're right. I need to tell him. But it's not going to be easy getting him to understand…do you think you could tell him?" She asked suddenly.

"Do you think that's the best idea?"

"Probably not."

"You know Joy, even though he has a chip in his head, Spike still has the same emotions and urges as any normal vampire. The chip doesn't make him care about people. That's all him." Angle told her carefully.

Joy nodded. "I know that…"

"If you really care about him then you need to talk to him about this vision."

"You're right." She rested her head against his shoulder. "Thanks Angel."

"No, thank you Joy. You did a lot for me! I'm so sorry I hurt you!"

"I'll heal." She grinned. "You should probably go get some rest or something."

He agreed and left the room. Joy quickly pulled a white hoodie on over her tank top and headed down stairs. She stopped at the door to the living room where everyone was gathered together, talking. She wanted to slip past them to avoid questioning but they waved her in and she had to oblige. She noticed that Angel had been pulled in too. He was sitting on the couch with Dawn and Willow. Joy leaned against the wall, waiting.

"We were just talking about why this happened." Buffy explained to Joy.

"And?" Joy questioned.

"At this time we really have no way of knowing why someone would have wanted to turn Angel back to Angelus, but we must assume that it was for a dark purpose. So until we have more information, you and Buffy need to be extra careful on patrol, and always keep your ears open for whatever information you can find!" Giles informed the group.

"Sounds good." Joy started to back out of the room.

"Wait…" Buffy stopped her. "Where are you going?"

"I just umm, well I need a walk!" Joy answered.

"Are you sure that's safe?" Buffy frowned.

Joy nodded. "I'll be fine."

"Did you take care of your…umm wounds?" Giles asked carefully, glancing towards Angel.

She nodded. "Yea, I'm fine." And she quickly left the room before anyone could ask her any more questions.


	41. Chapter Forty One

_A/N: I really do enjoy writing this story, and I really have a lot of what I believe are fun ideas for the future, but the interest of my readers seems to be dwindling! If I still have any interested readers, please just leave me a comment so I'll know if it's worth continuing! Even just a 'hey, I'm reading' sort of comment would be great! Thanks! _

Chapter Forty-One: Separation

Joy dreaded having to explain her vision to Spike so much that she took twice as long as normal to reach his crypt. When she finally did reach it she stood outside for almost a full three minutes before achieving the courage to actually knock on the door. Before she had a chance to knock though the door opened and Spike stood just inside the dark crypt.

"Spike…" Joy seemed to have suddenly lost her voice.

"Did you come here to see me?" He questioned.

"Umm, yea…" Joy nodded. "I did…I mean well…you were going out?"

Spike shook his head. "I…well I wanted to come and see you but I didn't think you'd want me yet…" He looked at the ground. "I smelled you when you got here."

Joy glanced at him quickly and then looked away. "I'm sorry I made you leave…"

"Why did you? I don't understand what I did wrong! It wasn't me that hurt you!" Spike's eyes were red and Joy wondered for a minute if he had actually been crying.

"I need to talk to you Spike." Joy said slowly.

"Fine, come in." He moved away from the doorway and motioned for her to follow him inside the crypt. She stepped inside the door and hesitated for a moment. "Do you want to sit?" He suggested, pointing towards the couch.

She shook her head. "I just need to get this over with."

Spike stared at her hard. "Are you breaking up with me, Joy?"

Joy was silent for a minute. "I don't want to Spike. I really care about you…" She sighed. "I need to know something though. All I know about you is that you were a horribly vicious vampire and then you got this chip in your head and now you don't hurt people anymore…"

Spike frowned but nodded. "Basically, I guess."

"If you didn't have the chip in your head Spike, would you want to hurt me?" Joy asked quickly.

"What?"

"I need to know. I need to know that I can trust more than just your leash. I need to be able to trust you for you and not for what the government did to you. I want to trust you, you have no idea how much, but I need to hear it from you…" She looked at him sincerely. "I need you tell me that you would never hurt me, no matter what."

He sighed. "Joy, there is no way for me to prove it to you because it's true that you only know what you can see. But you have to believe that I would never _want_ to hurt you…"

"But?"

"But to be completely truthful, I have no way of knowing for sure what I would try to do if this chip wasn't here. I want to believe that I would be able to control myself, that my feelings for you would stop me, but honestly, I'm not sure…"

Joy nodded. "That's what I thought. Thank you for being honest."

"Now what?" Spike asked after a minute of silence. "Is that it for us? You don't know if you can trust me so you don't want to be with me?"

"That's not what this was about Spike." Joy sighed. "When Angel bit me I had a vision. A vampire was feeding on me and it was so intense, so wild and out of control…it was the scariest feeling I have ever known…"

"I don't understand, it's obviously because Angel was feeding on you…"

Joy shook her head. "The vampire in my vision was you, Spike."

"But…" Spike didn't know how to respond. "I wouldn't…"

"You just said that you could."

He hung his head. "And that's why you didn't want me around you?"

Joy nodded. "I'm not sure if I can trust you Spike. I don't know if I will ever be able to completely."

"Okay…"

"I want to though!" She assured him. "I want to trust you with all my heart…but…"

"I understand." Spike tried to smile to encourage him. "Don't worry about hurting my feelings Gidget." He carefully moved towards her and kissed her briefly. "I think you should go."

"But Spike…"

"No, it would probably be best for you to go." Spike decided. "You need rest and we probably both need time to think."

Joy nodded. "Fine. I'll come see you tomorrow."

"Let me come to you. I'll come after sunset tomorrow."

"Alright." Joy agreed. "I'll be waiting."

"Goodbye Joy."

Joy frowned at his solemn tone. "Goodbye…"

Joy paced the length of the living room anxiously. The sky had been dark for almost an entire hour and Spike still hadn't shown up.

"Something's wrong! He should have been here by now!" Joy whined, pausing in front of the window and peering out anxiously into the lengthening night shadows.

Angel leaned against the doorframe of the living room, watching the young slayer critically. He frowned. "I'm sure everything's fine, Joy."

Joy shook her head. "No, I don't think so! It just feels wrong…" She stepped back from the window and crossed her arms. "I have to go to him. He wouldn't be this late if something wasn't wrong."

"Joy, I think you're worrying too soon. Just give him some time…" Angel pleaded. He stepped in front of her as she tried to exit the room.

"Why are you stopping me?" Joy demanded.

"I'm not…" Angel hesitated. "I just think you should wait. If he said he'd come, then he will! You're paranoid."

"I have reasons to be." Joy argued. "This isn't the first time I've been stood up. Last time my boyfriend was becoming a vampire…obviously that's not the case here, but…"

Angel stared at her hard. "Joy, just wait for a few more minutes. He's got a lot to work through and I'm sure he's just taking his time coming because of everything that's happened…"

"Do you think he won't come?" Joy asked, suddenly afraid for a whole different reason. "Angel, why don't you want me to go to him?"

Angel didn't answer.

"What do you know?" Joy demanded.

"Nothing. I just don't want you to get hurt." Angel answered.

"You think Spike's going to hurt me?"

"I don't know." Angel shrugged. "He's unpredictable Joy. He always has been."

"I trust him." Joy decided firmly. "He cares about me. He would never hurt me." Her eyes were filling with fiery tears.

"Of course he wouldn't want to but…" Angel's words faltered as the door front door opened and Buffy slipped into the house. She didn't seem to notice the other two.

"Where've you been?" Joy questioned quickly.

Buffy gasped slightly as she spotted Joy and Angel standing in the doorway of the adjoining room. "Oh, just out, you know."

"It's too early for patrolling. Were you with Riley?" Joy asked. Angel's jaw tensed, but the girls didn't notice.

"No. I wasn't." Buffy answered simply.

"Where were you Buffy?" Joy asked again.

"I just had something to take care of…" Buffy replied swiftly. She eyed Angel briefly before hurrying up the stairs to her room.

Joy stared at Angel for a moment, trying to read his blank expression then her eyes narrowed darkly and she darted to the front door.

"Joy wait!" Angel ran after her as she rushed down the street.

"Don't follow me Angel! You and Buffy are keeping something from me…" Joy shouted back at him.

Angel stopped running after her. "I didn't want you to get hurt Joy! I was only thinking of you!" He called after her as she disappeared farther down the street.

Joy didn't reply but only ran faster. When she reached the door to Spike's crypt she paused. She could feel something was wrong. Joy knocked quickly. "Spike!" She called out loudly, knocking again. When there was no answer she pushed the door opened and stepped into the dark crypt. "Spike, answer me!" She shouted frantically, moving quickly across the floor to the trap door that led down to his more personal living quarters. She hurried down the steps and peered into the dark space. She pulled the lighter out of her pocket and flicked on the flame. "Spike?" Her eyes burned with tears as she realized that the room was stripped bear of all his personal belongings. The only thing left was the furniture that he had stockpiled over the years. She lit a candle on a nearby table and returned her lighter to the pocket of her jeans. "Spike…you promised not to disappoint me…" Joy whispered as tears spilled from her eyes. She dropped onto the bed in the center of the room and curled up, muffling her sobs into the mattress.

"Joy…" A soft whisper startled her out of her solitary sobs. "Have you been down here this whole time?" Angel asked her as he sat on the edge of the bed. Joy had lost track of how long she had been crying for and so she just shrugged and kept her chin tucked down against her chest. "Joy, why don't you come home with me now?"

"You knew he was leaving. You were a part of it somehow." Joy mumbled. "You and Buffy…and you were keeping me at the house so I couldn't stop him!"

Angel didn't answer. In a way she was absolutely correct, but at the same time it hadn't been his idea so he didn't feel it was completely fair of her to accuse him. But he still knew that her anger was justified.

"You let me stand there and worry and all that time you knew that he was leaving…" Joy coughed as tears gurgled in her throat. "How could you betray me like this?"

Angel hung his head. "I didn't mean to hurt you Joy."

"You wanted him to seem like the bad guy." Joy sat up suddenly. "You kept me back so I would hate him and blame him for leaving and not realize that you were probably the reason he left in the first place! I don't know what you and Buffy did to get rid of him, but I want you to know that I blame you." She swung her legs over the side of the bed and stood quickly. "This was your fault. You are the reason he is gone and I will not forgive you for that!"

Angel stood and followed her as she started towards the steps, leading up out of the underground bedroom. "Joy, this isn't my fault. He would have left eventually anyway. I can't tell you what made him leave now. I really wasn't a part of it. The only thing I am guilty of is keeping you at the house so you wouldn't be hurt by seeing him leave."

Joy shook her head and started up. "I don't believe you. He never would have left me. He promised."

"But he did leave." Angel insisted. It was his choice! You have to realize that nothing I could say to him would make him leave! He doesn't give a damn what I say!"

Joy escaped into the fresh night air and blinked back the new tears that were burning her eyes. She hated to admit that Angel was right. Spike would never have listened to him on something like this. _But he promised!_ She argued with herself. _He promised not to leave me. Not to disappoint me…or to hurt me…_

"Joy, please don't hate me forever." Angel called after her from the doorway of Spike's crypt.

Joy glanced over her shoulder at Angel and frowned. "When will you learn to stay out of my way and let me make my own decision? I don't need you to protect me from getting hurt!" She took off running, leaving him behind.

"Joy, where've you been?" Dawn looked up anxiously from the couch where she was watching TV with Willow.

Joy didn't pause to answer Dawn as she banged through the front door and rushed up the stairs. Without even hesitating to knock on Buffy's bedroom door, Joy barged in, cornering the older slayer in front of her window.

"What the hell did you do to him?" Joy demanded instantly.

Buffy turned around slowly to face the fiery young slayer. "I didn't do anything."

"Like hell you didn't! You were with him before he left. You made him leave!" Joy argued. "What did you do to make him leave?"

"We talked. That's all." Buffy insisted firmly. "I went to see him this afternoon and he told me about your vision and then asked me for my opinion." She glanced away from Joy. "I didn't want to give him my opinion because I knew that you'd be angry at me for stepping in, but he was very determined and so we talked. And then he decided to leave…"

"What did you tell him?" Joy asked through gritted teeth.

"I told him to make up his own mind, but to be careful in deciding too quickly." Buffy answered solemnly. "That's all."

Joy glared. "You're lying. I don't believe you! You made him leave! He wouldn't leave me without a reason!"

Buffy sighed in despair as she watched the young slayer flee from the room and then listened to her feet pounding down the stairs and slamming the front door on her way out of the house.

"I'm sorry." Buffy whispered into the air, sinking down on the bed. "You should have listened to me in the first place…"

"Slayer," Spike opened the door in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

Buffy hesitated at the doorway of Spike's crypt. "I needed to talk to you." She glanced around the darkening cemetery before proceeding into Spike's dark 'home'. "About Joy."

Spike sighed and took a step back, allowing Buffy to enter farther and take a seat on his surprisingly comfortable couch. "Are you here to try and warn me off again?" He lit up a cigarette and leaned against the wall across from where she was sitting.

"I'm not here to give you a lecture, or to tell you to stay away from her, or any of that type of thing. I'm just here to talk." Buffy told him plainly.

"About what?" Spike asked with a frown.

"Do you believe that you love her, Spike?" Buffy asked slowly. Spike was confused by her question and answered her with silence. "Spike, do you remember when you believed you love me?"

Spike frowned. "I never loved you like that Buffy. I cared about you, I probably always will, but only in the way that I realize you are a special woman. Romantically you were nothing but a good shag." Spike's truthfulness shocked Buffy and now it was her turn to be silent. "Don't look so bloody offended Slayer, you know it's true."

Buffy nodded. "I know. That's all that it was for me too."

"Good, then since we have that sorted out…" Spike rolled his eyes. "What you need to understand is that the feelings I have for Joy is so much more than a physical desire…" He took a deep breath. "I haven't given it much consideration really, but I think that I might truly love her, as you say."

"Spike, I have a difficult time believing that you could have sincere feelings for anyone." Buffy interrupted.

"That's your prerogative Slayer."

"You know that if you didn't have the chip in your head, you would hurt her Spike." Buffy reminded him. "I've seen her suffering already, why?"

Spike hung his head. "She had another vision. I thought she might have told you all by now, but I guess not."

Buffy shook her head. "What was her vision?" She felt a little betrayed that the younger slayer hadn't confessed this information yet.

"When she was with Angel, in the cemetery, and he was biting her…" Spike cringed at the memory of watching the two of them together. "She had a vision of me feeding on her."

Buffy closed her eyes, imagining the fear that Joy must have experienced from that vision. "So now she won't trust you again?"

"She said she would, well she said she wants to be able to, but I know she'll always be afraid." Spike admitted.

Buffy gasped, suddenly understanding. "You weren't going to her tonight, were you?" Spike shook his head. "You were leaving."

Spike nodded. "I was just waiting to get up enough courage. She won't understand…"

"She'll have to eventually." Buffy decided.

"You'll look after her, won't you?" Spike asked firmly. "She isn't as strong as she likes to believe she is."

Buffy nodded. "I know. I'll take care of her Spike." She stood and analyzed Spike's hopeless expression carefully. "You're serious about this aren't you? I mean you really do care about her…"

Spike nodded. "I assumed I had made that point."

Buffy shrugged. "You claim to care about her, but I'm unfortunately blinded by my past experiences with you, Spike."

"I understand." Spike stated. Buffy started towards the door. "Slayer, not that I feel it's any of your bloody business, but…Joy and I…we have never slept together."

Buffy tried to mask the look of surprise that she knew had formed on her face. "How long will you be gone, Spike?"

"As long as it takes."


	42. Chapter Forty Two

_A/N: Wow, thanks so much for all the positive reviews! I would have been updating this story much more frequently if I knew that so many people were still interested in it! I know I've been told that people are still reading even if they aren't reviewing, but I'm sure any of you who have ever written one of your own can understand how encouraging it is to actually see the interest in reviews! So, please, if you read my story and enjoy it just give me a review, one word would be enough! And if you don't enjoy it that's okay too, I'm always interested in opinions to help me improve! Thanks again for all the positive feedback and I promise to try and update more regularly. This chapter is kinda boring but it was necessary to keep the story going. The next few chapters should be more interesting, I'm really excited for the upcoming parts! _

**WhiteTwitch**: _Yea, slayer visions do usually come true (I'm not sure if it's always, but I assume so) the only thing is they don't necessarily have a time frame…_

**MoonSeaEarth:** _Thanks so much for the review! _

**Maronwe024: **_Umm, I don't know if I gave any hints at making this a Spuffy, because I definitely didn't intend to. I think it's been pretty obvious that this will not be a Spuffy! _

Chapter Forty-Two: Summer of Loneliness

"Have you ever thought about what things would have been like if you had not been the slayer when we met?"

Buffy smiled slightly and snuggled into Riley's chest. "And you hadn't been a secret government agent?" she giggled freely, like she hadn't in quite a while. "Of course I've thought of it."

"Have you ever regretted developing a relationship with a government agent?" Riley questioned carefully.

"The only parts I've regretted so far were the times that we were apart." Buffy told him truthfully.

"The times when you were screwing Spike…"

"Riley, please, we agreed not to talk about that." Buffy insisted. "We have to realize that we'll never have a normal relationship because we don't have normal lives, but we'll have to get past that…"

Riley sat up suddenly. "You're right."

"Where are you going?" Buffy frowned and reached out to Riley as he stood up from the couch where the two had been cuddling.

"To work on our normal lives." Riley smiled. "I'll pick you up tomorrow at seven."

"But what about tonight?" Buffy pouted. "I'm all alone and it's no fun…"

"Dawn will be home soon." Riley reminded her. "You guys can paint your nails or whatever it is you girls do."

"Very funny." Buffy rolled her eyes. "Besides she's out with Colin, living her normal teenage life, I doubt she'll be home for hours."

Riley shrugged. "Well, you could always, I don't know, patrol?" He grinned. "Maybe you'll see Joy…"

"I don't want to. She just puts me in a bad mood." Buffy complained. "Oh I know! I'll go bug Giles. That always cheers me up."

"Sounds good." Riley pulled her to her feet and kissed her quickly before departing. "Have a good night and try to stay out of trouble!"

Once he had left her, Buffy quickly loaded her jacket pockets with stakes and knives and hurried out of the house, walking briskly towards the cemetery. Buffy slowed her pace before she reached the graveyard, hearing the betraying grunts and curses of a fight already in progress.

"I had hoped that you wouldn't patrol tonight." Joy complained as she noticed Buffy emerging from the bushes that bordered the south end of the cemetery.

Buffy rolled her eyes as Joy slammed her knuckles against the vampire's skull and then staked him expertly. "Get over yourself Joy. You have no right to be a bitch to me. I told you I didn't do anything."

Joy pocketed her favorite stake and started away from Buffy.

"Are you ever going to come home, Joy?" Buffy called out after the younger slayer.

"It's pretty unlikely." Joy shouted back.

"Joy, you can't live in a motel forever." Buffy argued, hurrying after Joy.

"That's not really you're problem Buff. I can take care of myself without your interference." Joy insisted bitterly.

Buffy sighed. "I never meant to interfere. Besides, I already told you, he would have left no matter what I said."

"Then why won't you tell me what the two of you talked about?" Buffy chewed on her lip and dropped her eyes to the ground. "I rest my case." Joy turned to leave but Buffy grabbed hold of her wrist. Instinctively Joy spun around and swung her free arm, connecting her fist with Buffy's jaw.

The older slayer let go immediately. "Dammit Joy!"

Joy's bright eyes widened briefly but she quickly resumed a firm scowl. "Keep your hands off me, and get the hell away…"

Buffy stared blankly after the fiery young girl as she rushed off into the night.

**The next morning at Joy's motel: **

"Joy, it's been almost a month? Are you ever going to come back?" Dawn pleaded as she stretched out on the rumpled quilt of the motel bed in the room that Joy had been renting since the night Spike had left town.

"I doubt it." Joy replied bitterly. "Did Buffy send you here again to beg me?"

Dawn shook her head. "No I wanted to come. I miss you. Since school's out for the summer and you're not living at home, I feel like I never see you. Besides being at home all day without you is sort of hell. Buffy's been in psycho-mom mode lately. She actually suggested that I take summer school."

"Did you fail something?" Joy questioned with a slight grin as she turned away from where she was doing her makeup in the grimy mirror hanging on the wallpapered walls.

"No, surprisingly, I passed with an above average GPA, but she thinks it would do me good or something." Dawn shrugged. "I think she's just uneasy with me being around all the time."

"Yea, probably." Joy agreed. "So, does she know you're here with me right now?"

Dawn shook her head. "Probably not. When I left she was so wrapped up with Riley that she probably didn't even notice." Dawn sat up suddenly and stared hard at Joy. "Please stop acting like nothing's wrong Joy. You just left the house! You didn't give me any explanation! I had to figure out from pieces of conversation that I could piece together from my eavesdropping! I didn't know where you were or if something had happened to you…"

"Dawn, you called me only an hour after I checked into this motel. You hardly had time to really be worried about my safety." Joy insisted.

"That's so not the point!" Dawn argued. "You still haven't told Buffy where you are, have you?"

"No, and you better not have either. When I finally agreed to let you come here today, you promised that you wouldn't tell anyone else! She knows I'm at a motel and that's enough."

"I know and I've kept my promise, but if Buffy finds out, she'll be so pissed that I kept it from her!" Dawn fretted.

Joy rolled her eyes. "I'm not living in this shithole because I care what pisses Buffy off."

Dawn frowned. "What did she do to make you so upset?"

"She got rid of Spike."

"You blame her for Spike's leaving?" Dawn asked, seeming more than a little confused. Clearly her eavesdropping had not given her enough information this time.

Joy nodded. "I'm not sure what she did exactly, but I'm sure he left because of something she said or maybe she threatened him in some way…"

"Joy, you can't blame her if you don't know the facts!" Dawn protested.

"I know enough." Joy insisted. "No matter what she claims, I know she had something to do with it."

"So that's what created the whole fight between you two?" Dawn pieced together. "I heard you had quite a go at it last night while on patrol."

Joy nodded. "She's still refusing to tell me what she did."

"You should have seen how Buffy's lip swelled." Dawn grinned slightly. "She's always bragged about how unbreakable she was, but I knew it was an act."

Joy felt slightly guilty. "I didn't mean to hit her."

"I'm glad you did." Dawn decided. "She a bitch for breaking up you and Spike."

"We're not broken up!" Joy exclaimed quickly. "We're just on a break."

"But he's gone." Dawn reminded her carefully. "You don't know if he's even going to ever come back."

"He'll be back." Joy insisted firmly. "He just needed some time to work out some stuff. But he'll come back. I know he will."

Dawn noticed how tightly Joy was clenching her fists and decided it was best not to argue with the vehement little slayer.

"You should go. Anya will be expecting you at the Magic Box soon." Joy broke the silence. Dawn followed her gaze to the clock and nodded.

"Working for Anya is such a pain." Dawn muttered regretfully as she prepared to leave. "Joy, one thing before I go…will you ever come home?"

"I don't know." Joy sighed. "I don't think Buffy would want me to after how I've treated her."

"That's not true." Dawn protested.

"I punched her Dawn." Joy reminded her.

"Yea, well I'm sure she's forgiven you. We all want you to come home."

"You're going to be late Dawn." Joy pushed Dawn towards the door and she left in disappointment.

**That night at the Summers' house:**

"Seven o'clock on the dot!" Riley announced proudly as Buffy opened the door for him.

"Very good, but I don't see why you couldn't just let yourself in, that's why I gave you a key." Buffy told him as she viewed her final appearance in the hall mirror. "Aren't you coming in?"

Riley shook his head. "Tonight we are going out on a date like any other normal couple…" He frowned as she moved into the light. "What the hell happened to you?"

Buffy remembered her beautiful swollen lip. "Joy."

Riley raised his eyebrows and nodded in comprehension. "So I guess you did go patrol last night."

Buffy nodded. "What did you mean about being like any other normal couple?"

"Tonight there is no government, no demons, no slayers, just you and me, a girl and a boy spending Saturday night out on the town." Riley snatched her purse away from her and removed the stake and dagger she had inside. "And definitely no slaying tonight."

A slow grin crept over Buffy's swollen lips. "Are you my prince charming, finally coming to ride me off into the blood-free sunset?"

Riley nodded solemnly. "As you wish, m'lady." He helped her into her light jacket and led the way out to his car in the driveway. He opened the passenger side door for her, and then jogged around to his side.

"Where are we going tonight Mr. Finn?" Buffy asked joyfully as he headed towards town.

"First, Miss Summers, we are going to eat." He drove the short distance to the nicest restaurant in Sunnydale.

………………

"I told you it's not a big deal." Buffy complained for what seemed like the hundredth time that night. Riley would not forget her fight with Joy and he insisted on bringing it up every time there was a lull in their otherwise enjoyable conversations.

"Buffy, I know the two of you have never exactly been best friends, but you've gotten along! You're the only family that girl has and I know you regret losing her trust over something as stupid as Spike." Riley pressed.

"Riley, I appreciate your concern, I really do, but you need to let it go. It's my problem and I can deal with it." Buffy argued, trying to keep her voice controlled as the two enjoyed an after-dinner cup of coffee in town.

"I know you can deal with it, you can always deal with your problems, but every now and then you should let someone else help you. You take on too much by yourself Buffy and I know it wears on you…"

"Riley, seriously, you need to drop it now." Buffy responded tensely.

Riley frowned at her tone but obligingly silenced for a few minutes. She knew that he was still trying to work out a solution in his mind even though he was quiet and she smiled. As much as it bothered her to discuss her argument with Joy during her date night, she loved how much he cared for her problems and wanted to help her sort them out.

"Riley," Buffy sighed with a somewhat less irritated tone than before. "Joy was hurt desperately. In a way I know how she must feel…Spike left her when she thought that she'd be able to rely on him. For the first time in a long time, Joy finally felt like her life was settling down. She had a home and a steady boyfriend who she really thought she could trust, and he just up and left her, and to make it worse, she thinks it was my fault!"

"But it wasn't." Riley reminded her.

"I know that. And I've told her that, but she won't let herself believe that Spike was going to leave her. It's easier for her to blame someone and since I happened to be the last one to talk to him, she's blaming me." Buffy explained. "I just wish she'd listen to me. I want her to come home but until she accepts the truth I don't think that will happen."

"Did you find out why Spike was going to leave when you went to see him?" Riley asked.

"He was scared of hurting her." Buffy told him. "He was afraid he wouldn't be able to control his animal self."

Riley nodded in understanding. "Do you think he'll ever come back?"

"I don't know. He didn't sound like he wanted to be gone forever, but I'm not sure what it was specifically he wanted to do. He said he'd be gone as long as it took…whatever that means." Buffy sighed. "I never thought I'd say it, but I hope he comes back. I hate how Joy is suffering without him."

…………

Joy held back her tears as she eavesdropped on Buffy and Riley's conversation from her hiding place around the corner. They had chosen to have a cup of coffee while sitting at an outside table at the coffee shop, so while Joy was out for her evening patrol she passed them and managed to slip around the corner without them seeing her. She was going to ignore them, but stopped when she realized they were talking about her. She listened to the whole conversation and for the first time she realized how stupid she was to accuse Buffy so quickly. She should have known that Buffy had been telling her the truth, but it had been so convenient to blame her.

Now she knew what she would have to do, even though she dreaded going through with it. Gathering up her courage, Joy stepped out from behind the corner and approached the table.

"Joy!" Riley stood when he saw her.

"Umm, hi…" Joy offered an awkward smile. "I really didn't mean to interrupt your date."

Buffy didn't know what to say so she let Riley carry on the polite required conversation.

"Do you want to join us?" Riley asked, quickly pulling up an extra chair.

"I don't think I should." Joy decided, glancing hesitantly at Buffy. "I just wanted to say something really quickly…if that's okay with you Buffy?"

Buffy nodded, turning to Joy curiously. "What did you want to say?"

"I know I shouldn't have been listening, but I heard you talking with Riley…" Joy admitted.

"So now you're spying on me?" Buffy accused.

"No! I just overheard…" Joy defended angrily. She glared at Buffy. "If you don't want to hear what I have to say then fine, I don't care."

Riley stared at Buffy pointedly and she sighed. "I'm sorry for overreacting Joy. Go ahead, I'm listening."

"I realize that I might have jumped a little too quickly to conclusions about what happened with Spike leaving." Joy explained slowly. "I think that if I had a more rational personality I would have been more willing to listen to you in the first place, a lot of trouble could have been solved these last few weeks."

Buffy was a little confused. "So, you're saying that you believe me?"

Joy nodded. "I guess so. I was wrong to assume that you had something to do with his leaving, and you were right to say that I needed someone to blame." Tears clouded her eyes. "I don't understand why he left…"

Buffy stood and awkwardly held her arms out to Joy. "You have to realize that I would never want to bring more hurt into your life Joy. I know you haven't known me for very long, but I really do care about you."

Joy cried and let Buffy hug her. "I'm sorry I've been so horrible to you Buffy. It's just so easy for me to believe that people don't care about me…"

"Well, I hope you will be able to get over that some day." Buffy told her. "And maybe, in some small way you'll let me help you."

Joy nodded. "I hope you're right." The slayers broke the hug. "Can I still come home?"

Buffy nodded. "Of course, I know Dawn's been dying for you to come back."

**One Month Later:**

"It's been a long summer." Dawn remarked unnecessarily.

Joy sighed. "Yea, it's been long. I'm actually almost excited for school to start up again."

"Yea, I'm not quite feeling that yet." Dawn smirked.

"Well of course you've had a boyfriend to keep you entertained all summer." Joy rolled her eyes. Dawn looked slightly uncomfortable at the accusation. "Don't worry Dawn, I'm not trying to make you feel guilty or anything, I'm just saying…"

Dawn nodded. "No, you're right, I'm sorry if I've been leaving you out at all this summer…Colin and I always mean to include you."

"I know, and you guys are great at trying but you need your romantic time alone. I would never want to intrude on that time." Joy smiled understandingly.

Dawn sensed something deeper beneath Joy's expression. "Alright, tonight Colin and I are going to the Bronze and you are coming with us to have a good time and get your mind of all your stress." She smiled with her plan.

Joy looked skeptical. "I'm not sure I feel like it tonight Dawn."

"Too bad. You don't have much of a choice." Dawn decided. "You have been running around in sweatpants, with no makeup all summer, it is time to dress up and go out!"

Joy sighed. "Fine, we'll go, but I'm not planning to stay very long."

"Good enough for me." Dawn stood and headed for the door. "I'm going to get ready and Colin will be here to pick us up in an hour. Be ready."

Joy nodded. "I'll see you then." As soon as Dawn headed down the hallway to her own room, Joy chose to take a shower and actually fix herself up for the club night, instead of pulling her hair up and skipping makeup as she had been prone to do throughout the summer. She figured it would at least satisfy Dawn if she took the effort to shave her legs and wear something more than sports clothes.

An hour later when Dawn was knocking on her bedroom door, Joy was ready for a fun night out, dressed in a denim mini skirt and a black halter with her hair straightened and her bare legs accented with fishnet stockings and stiletto boots.

"Oh my god Joy!" Dawn beamed. "You look so hot. I'm proud. I'd almost forgotten that you were capable of getting fixed up."

Joy scowled. "Very funny." She pulled on a red leather jacket. "Is Colin here?"

Dawn nodded. "He's downstairs, and umm, he brought a friend with him…"

Joy stopped abruptly. "You planned a blind date, and didn't tell me? What the hell were you thinking Dawn?"

Dawn cowered. "It was Colin's idea. He's been worried about you pining over Spike for the rest of your life."

"I don't think that's any of his business!" Joy responded sharply. "Whatever, let's get this over with."

Dawn smiled hopefully and nearly dragged Joy down the stairs to where the boys were waiting by the front door. Joy quickly analyzed the young guy standing beside Colin. Joy recognized him from the varsity football team, but she couldn't place his name.

"Hey girls. Joy, this is Billy." Colin introduced quickly.

"Hi Joy." Billy grinned at Hoy, spreading his thin lips wide, revealing bright white teeth. "I hope you're not too disappointed by me."

Joy snickered and shook her head. "Whatever. I'm here for a good time, I'm not too particular about who I'm with."

Billy shrugged and tossed his shaggy black hair out of his face. His steady green eyes showed he didn't care much about her motive for the date. He held his hand out to her and she took it. Joy was determined to make the most out of the arranged date, if for no other reason than to prove to Dawn that she was still capable of enjoying herself and that she was not pining over Spike anymore.

**Later at the Bronze…**

"Come on, let's have another round!" Joy insisted jovially. She batted her eyes at the bartender and flirtatiously traced around the patter on his apron. He easily served her a second round of beers for the group.

"Joy, we really shouldn't have had even the first round." Dawn argued, she alone hadn't had more than a couple sips of her first glass of beer.

"I know you don't want to get in trouble with Buffy, but do you honestly think she never drank when she was our age?" Joy laughed. "Besides you told me to have fun, I'm just obeying your orders."

Dawn glanced hesitantly at Colin who shrugged and drank heartily from his glass. Billy seemed anxious to impress Joy who was drinking easily, and quickly downed his second glass.

"Time to dance!" Joy decided as she finished her second glass and began on Dawn's as well. She gulped down half the glass and grasped Billy's hand, pulling him to the dance floor. He followed willingly.

"Are you drunk yet?" Billy asked with a slight slur to his speech.

Joy laughed, realizing that Billy was not as practiced as she was at drinking. "Do you really think two beers could get me drunk?" She slipped her arms around his neck. "Why? Do you want me drunk?"

Billy blushed sheepishly. "Well you know how talk flies, especially around the guys' locker room…and after you and Blake broke up, he started talking about the things you would do after a few drinks."

Joy tried not to react. "Oh? Like what?"

"Well, he detailed a few wild nights of striptease and the craziest sex he's ever had." Billy told her openly.

"And you figure that if you get me drunk enough I'd flatter you with the same fun and games?" Joy asked, slowly losing control of her temper.

"Well, yea, I mean if you'd rather be sober then let's get started!" Billy exclaimed, pulling her body tight to his and nibbling at his neck.

Joy jerked back and punched him ferociously, knocking him to the ground. "You'd be better off not listening to crude locker room gossip and keeping your hands to yourself." She glared at the other dancers who were staring and wandered over to the bar. "I need a vodka martini with two olives."

"I'm already pushing my job security, doll…" The bartender protested.

Joy sighed. "Come on Tim, you've never refused me before. Com on, I had a horrible blind date, I really could use a drink, stronger than beer."

Tim, the bartender, frowned but finally gave in. He handed her the drink and she smiled appreciatively before he moved away from her to continue his duties.

"Anyone sitting here?"

Joy turned as a young, fairly attractive man sat at the barstool beside her. "Well, it seems that you are now." She returned her attention to her drink. She ignored the guy entirely as she pulled out a cigarette.

"Need a light?" Joy turned to her other side where a new man had taken a seat.

"Yes, thank you." Joy smiled and let him light her cigarette.

"Are you alone?" The man with the lighter asked.

"I was until you showed up." Joy answered teasingly. "What's your name?"

"Jason, and yours is…"

"Joy."

"Well, here's to not being alone! Cheers!" He held up his own drink and clinked it against hers.

"Cheers Jason!" Joy smiled and finished her drink quickly. The moment she finished her drink, Joy felt her head growing dizzy. It was a nauseated and lighthearted feeling that she was unfamiliar with. She dropped her forehead into her hands and squeezed her eyes shut.

"Are you alright?" Jason asked quickly.

Joy nodded drowsily. "I feel so dizzy. I've got to get home." She stood and took a few wavering steps. Both guys from the bar quickly came to steady her. "I'm fine…" She was only partially aware of the two men leading her out of the club before she passed out entirely.

……………

"She's waking up." A harsh voice whispered as Joy began to regain consciousness.

She squeezed her eyes tightly and then opened them. "Who the hell are you?" She asked as soon as she could comprehend her surroundings. She realized that she was lying down on something soft, probably a mattress, and her feet and hands were secured with cold, heavy chains. Standing above her were the two men from the bar, one on each side of her. They were staring down at her with curious yet controlled expressions in their cold eyes. "What do you want from me?"

"She's not very bright is she?" Jason asked the other young man. "Next time, we might want to find someone a bit more intelligent. I hope he doesn't mind."

"He won't. If we'd found someone smarter she wouldn't have been so easy to drug and get out of there." The other guy responded.

"What's going on?" Joy gasped as Jason withdrew an ornately carved dagger from his belt. She began to struggle against the chains, assuming she'd be able to break free easily. She started panicking when she realized she couldn't move.

"Don't bother little girl, the drugs we slipped into your martini will keep you more or less paralyzed for a good few hours. The chains are just a precaution." Jason grinned wickedly and lowered the dagger towards her stomach. "Nothing personal Joy, you seem like a sweet girl, but you really shouldn't have made yourself such an easy target." He slid the blade of the dagger up from the edge of her shirt, easily slitting it in two, exposing her flat stomach. "You really are a beautiful girl, it's a shame kind of. I think I could have really enjoyed you…" He let his hand glide over her stomach and she wanted to pull away but still couldn't move.

"Stop wasting time." The other guy growled impatiently. He snatched the dagger out of Jason's hands and quickly sliced into the soft skin of Joy's stomach.

Joy screamed, shocked that she was able to feel pain when she was still unable to move any part of her body. He slid the blade into her again and dragged it through her skin. She screamed louder and hated how helpless she felt at that moment. She strained her eyes, trying to see what they were doing to her stomach but could only see the dagger being pulled away from her stomach, dripping with her blood.

"It will all be over soon Princess." Jason crooned as his friend sliced into her again.

"Why are you doing this to me?" Joy screamed at them.

"I told you, you were an easy target." Jason explained casually. "We needed an unmarked girl and you were her."

"Unmarked?" Joy gasped. "What the hell does that mean?"

Jason slid his hand up her stomach and over her breasts. "I'd like to have more time with you." He sighed and slowly ran his fingers over her neck. He stopped suddenly. "What the…" he brushed her hair away from her neck and his brows furrowed deeply. "Shit! She's not pure!"

Joy frowned. "What the hell does that mean? Pure? Like virginal?"

Jason glared at her. "No, not virginal! We aren't stupid, nobody who dresses like you can be a virgin!" He grabbed his friend's wrist before he was able to cut her again and pointed to Joy's neck. "She's been tasted. Her blood is unclean."

"Tasted? You're talking about the bites, aren't you? The vampire bites?" Joy gasped.

"Bites? There's more then one?" Jason demanded.

Joy snapped her mouth shut, not sure how much she should tell him. She had a nervous feeling that he would kill her if he couldn't use her.

"How the hell could a girl like you be fed on by a vampire and escape with your life?" The other guy asked.

"We can't use her." Jason decided. "He'll know that she's been used before. He will not be pleased."

The other guy raised the dagger and glared at Joy, positioning the blade over her chest. "Well, it was nice meeting you."

Joy shut her eyes tightly, preparing herself for the last moment of her life. She imagined what it would feel like to die and realized that in all her wildest dreams this was never one she had considered. She had always assumed that if she died unnaturally it would be from some fight with demons, not chained to a bed by two humans.

She had never been so aware of her capability of fear, but she felt completely paralyzed by the terror of dying in that moment (of course the fact that she was actually temporarily paralyzed might have had something to do with it too), her eyes were shut tightly, deciding it would be easier to accept death blind than watching it arrive. However, the men were interrupted as the door (from the best Joy could assume with her eyes shut) burst open, probably tearing completely off its hinges.

"Oh…I'm sorry mate, I think I'm a bit lost…and a bit drunk…" The voice was slurred and the words drawled out, but the voice was nonetheless recognizable to Joy. She snapped her eyes open, almost too doubtful to let herself believe, but he was staring directly at her and her doubt vanished in his familiar brown eyes.

The two men seemed confused about how to proceed after the strange interruption. They stood beside the paralyzed Joy, each man clutching their weapons tightly, watching the intruder nervously.

"Why don't you just turn around and walk away now mister." Jason urged cautiously.

"Hey what's going on here?"

"None of your business." Jason insisted.

"Oh that's a mature response. Well, hmm, it looks like you're doing some sort of sacrifice. Probably virginal or at least pure, right?"

Jason tightened his grip on the knife in his hand, seeming more nervous than before.

"Just a hint though, that girl's about as pure as I am…" he lowered his voice. "And I'm a vampire." He shrugged. "Fine, maybe she's a bit more pure than I am, but not far off, considering well you've seen the bite marks…you've really picked the wrong lady mate…" He grinned. "Not to mention, you've pissed off her boyfriend."

The guys didn't even have time to process what was happening before they were both on the floor, flat on their backs, moaning in pain from their minor injuries, while Joy was being freed from her bonds and lifted into their attacker's arms.

"Sorry to keep you waiting." Spike murmured into her ear.

"I knew you'd come back." Joy managed to whisper before passing out from the overwhelming exhaustion built up from the apprehension of dying.


	43. Chapter Forty Three

_A/N: I know it's been way too long, but I had an issue with my hard drive crashing. That sucked. Plus I have finals next week, so stress has been escalating lately. However, I have managed to get this chapter finished and I will try to get another one next week. Summer is almost here so I anticipate having much more time to write! Thanks for the reviews and once again please keep me encouraged with lots and lots of reviews! I'm not greedy…I swear…hmm…maybe just a little hopeful! Anyway, I want to apologize for the mix-up of character labeling for this story. I hadn't meant to put it in the Buffy/Spike romance section! Definitely not where it should be! But yea, so enjoy! _

Chapter Forty-Three: Acceptance

"Don't sit up too quickly." Spike instructed in a soft voice. "The drugs they gave you should have worn off mostly be now but they'll probably make you a little light-headed."

Joy opened her eyes and had to take a moment to steady her vision. When she finally managed to focus her vision she focused on his comforting face. It was the most rewarding sight to a long summer of loneliness and depression, and then at the same time it was the most painful because it was the face that had caused her the depression and heartache. She found it difficult to work out her conflicting motions in her mind.

"Hi." She whispered simply.

"Hi back." Spike smiled and reached out a hand to stroke her hair.

"Spike," Joy's cold tone warned him to pull his hand away. "You saved my life and I'm grateful to you, but it doesn't change anything. You left without a word. I didn't know what to think! I didn't know if you would ever be back…"

"I know, I'm sorry." Spike apologized, sounding as sincere as he should be in the circumstance.

"Spike, why did you leave me?" Joy asked pitifully.

"I had things to take care of."

"Like what?" Joy demanded.

He didn't answer.

"Spike, I know I freaked you out with my vision after the whole thing with Angel, but I never intended for you to leave me. I told you that I trusted you."

"You told me that you wanted to trust me. There's a difference." Spike reminded her.

"I still never meant for you to leave. I wanted to figure out a way to trust you and to trust our relationship." Joy told him. "But I needed you to stay with me. How could I trust a relationship with you now?"

"I know. I'm sorry I left you and I'm sorry I didn't tell you before I left, but I'm back now…"

Joy moved slightly but stopped when she felt a sharp pain at her stomach. She winced and gritted her teeth against the overwhelming burning sensation.

"Sweetie, don't move too much. Before I got to you they had begun some sort of ritual which involved your blood…"

"Of course." Joy nodded, remembering well the pain and terror of feeling the knives cut into her stomach. "Are the cuts very deep?"

Spike seemed hesitant to reply. "They're deep enough to leave scars. Maybe I should take you to a hospital."

"Don't be ridiculous. You know I'll heal fine."

Spike nodded. "I know, but you'll still probably scar."

Joy sighed. "Whatever, I don't really care too much about scars. I've found them to be the least of the worries in my life." She glared at him sharply. "Spike, I have spent the last three months hating you, but even worst, hating myself for missing you so damn much."

"Joy, I'm sorry…"

"No, stop it Spike. It's too late for you to apologize. When I let you into my life you gave me a promise." Joy closed her eyes so she wouldn't have to look at him while she spoke. "I was warned about you. They warned me to be careful and not to trust you, but I did. I gave you a chance when ever reasonable voice around me told me not to…" A tear leaked from her closed eyelids. "I trusted you and I truly cared for you and I had let myself believe that you cared for me…"

"I did, I mean, I do care for you." Spike cut her off. "You have no idea how much it hurt me to leave you."

"Spike, please stop. I have suffered enough because of you. Why can't you just leave me alone now and let me get over you?" Joy cried harder and Spike was silent. Joy felt the tips of her fingers tingling as the feeling increased throughout her body. "I need to get home. Dawn will probably be terrified when she realizes I'm not at the Bronze anymore."

"I'm sure she's realized by now." Spike informed her. "The sun's already up."

Joy frowned. "Then I really need to get home. She's probably got Buffy all worked up by now too." She struggled to sit up.

"Joy, I don't know if you should go by yourself." He hesitated. "If you wait a few hours I can take you home."

"A few hours?"

"Yea, when the sun goes down, I'll take you home myself."

"Spike, I can manage fine on my own." Joy insisted. "Just help me up, please." She held out her arms.

"I know you can manage, but I'm not sure what kind of condition you're in…you let two college guys drug you and cut you open and almost deliver you over to some creature as a sacrifice." Spike pointed out.

"They weren't going to sacrifice me. I'm not pure enough."

"Oh that's right, they were just going to kill you instead." Spike glowered.

"What do you want to say Spike? Don't hold back, just get it out and over with!" Joy demanded.

"What's happened with you? The Joy I knew never would have been such an easy target." He lectured bluntly.

Joy stared at him determinedly. "The Joy you knew had her heart broken. You should learn that loneliness and resentment can do wonders to a girl's defenses."

Spike didn't answer but instantly obliged her by helping her sit up. "I know it isn't going to do any good, but I am truly sorry."

Joy slid off the bed where she had been lying, still at the motel where the guys had brought her (though they were long gone after meeting Spike). She grabbed her stomach in pain as she stood. "It's too late for you apologies Spike. You have lost your place in my life."

Spike watched her leave, helpless to do anything but so desperately wanting to explain. "You seemed happy to see me before, when I saved you."

"I was drugged." Joy explained coldly.

…………

"How is she?" Xander asked the moment he stepped through the door. Anya followed eagerly at his heels.

Buffy frowned. "She's asleep. How did you hear so fast? She's only been home for a few hours. We've barely even gotten the whole story."

Xander looked puzzled. "Who needs the whole story? I think it would be pretty obvious how she's feeling right now."

Anya nodded. "Seriously, what a bastard! Just showing up after all these months and expecting her to what? Take him back with wide open legs?"

"Anya!" Xander reprimanded.

"What?" She asked innocently. "Fine, arms! Wide open arms!"

"Wait, I'm confused. What are you talking about?" Buffy interrupted.

"Spike and Joy of course!" Anya explained.

Willow gasped and stepped up beside Buffy. "Spike's back?"

"Well, yea. We assumed Joy told you…" Xander paused. "What are you two talking about then?"

"Joy was out all night and came back today with her stomach bandaged but no explanation for us." Willow told them.

"You don't think this had anything to do with Spike, do you?" Xander asked with anxiety in his tone.

"Spike would never hurt Joy." Buffy spoke up firmly and unexpectedly.

"Well, of course, not intentionally." Willow agreed. "But Buffy we have to consider…he has been gone for a while. What if he got the chip removed?"

Buffy's eyes widened. "You're right Will. I need to find him, since Joy isn't likely to come out and talk to us anytime soon." She grabbed her jacket from the hall tree. "While I'm gone I want you and Tara to anti-Spike the house. He's not allowed in without an invitation. Just in case."

"I'll come with you." Xander decided quickly.

"I'll stay here. Maybe Joy would like some tea." Anya suggested, heading for the kitchen.

Xander smiled after her. "My girlfriend's so thoughtful."

Buffy tried not to laugh. "Come on loverboy." She grabbed onto his arm and pulled him out the door. "Get on that spell, Will!"

…………

"Hey, it's me." Joy gripped the cordless phone between her chin and shoulder as she slowly un-bandaged her stomach. "I'm sorry to bother you so late."

"Joy, I'm a vampire. It's not late for me." Angel reminded her. Even over the phone she could tell he was grinning. "What's up?"

"You don't know?" She winced slightly as the bandages ripped away from her skin, detaching from the dried blood painfully.

"Oh, you mean Spike."

"Yea, Spike." Joy frowned. "Why didn't you warn me he was back?"

"Because I didn't know until an hour ago. He came to me when the sun went down. But he told me what happened. How're you feeling?" Angel asked.

"Like my stomach's been slashed multiple times by a sharp blade." She grimaced as she inspected herself in the mirror. "There's going to be some great scars." She complained, tracing her finger gingerly over the five slash marks that had begun the central star for the pentagram.

"Joy, he only wanted to help you." Angel told her cautiously. "He cares a lot for you."

"Then why did he abandon me three months ago?"

"Don't be an idiot Joy. He was afraid of hurting you…"

"I'm sorry Angel, but I can't deal with this right now. Not from you." She hung up the phone abruptly and dropped it carelessly to the floor. She pulled on her bathrobe and opened the bedroom door, quickly crossing the hallway. "Dawn?" She rapped her knuckles softly on the closed bedroom door. When there was no answer, Joy continued down the stairs. She heard the murmurs of television and hushed giggles coming from the living room so she followed the noise curiously. "Sorry to interrupt…"

Dawn and Collin quickly untangled themselves from their lip locked embrace and smiled up at Joy. "You're okay!" Dawn leapt from the couch and hugged Joy eagerly. "We were worried about you last night!"

"Yea, what happened to you?" Collin inquired, clearly concerned.

Joy pondered how much to tell them and opted for a brief explanation. "I ran into an old…acquaintance."

Dawn frowned, clearly not having been filled in by Buffy. "You were gone all night…"

"We had some catching up to do." Joy told her simply. "Sorry I didn't tell you guys when I left the Bronze, it was very unexpected. So, where is everybody?"

"Tara and Willow are asleep already, Anya was here for a while but she went home, and Buffy is _out_." Dawn answered, emphasizing the word 'out' so that Joy took it to mean out on patrol."

"Right, well, carry on!" Joy waved them back to their cuddling and headed to the kitchen. Soon their sweet nestling noises came again and Joy felt a pang of jealousy as she thought about what she and Spike use to have together. She tried pushing the thoughts out of her mind as she retrieved medical supplies from the cabinet where they were stored.

The front door opened and Joy heard Buffy and Xander discussing their lack of success that night. Joy quickly slipped up the back stairs and locked herself in her bedroom once again.

…………

"Dawn, it's late." Buffy stated simply, surveying her younger sister's cuddle session on the couch.

"Yea, so?" Dawn questioned carelessly.

Buffy rolled her eyes and stared pointedly at the juvenile couple. "Goodnight Collin." Her tone held icy warning and the jock wisely scurried off the couch and towards the front door.

"I'll pick you up tomorrow after work, Dawn!" He grinned at her as she blew him a kiss.

"What the heck, Buffy?" Dawn turned on her sister the moment the door had closed.

"Get over it, Dawn, I'm not in the mood." Buffy declared coldly. "Has Joy come out of her room yet?"

"Yea, just a few minutes ago. She headed for the kitchen." Dawn detailed. "She didn't tell me much thought about where she had been. She just said that she had run into an old acquaintance. Who do you suppose it was?"

Buffy glanced at Xander whose expression betrayed his worry. "Let's not jump to conclusions Buff." He said with a forced calmness in his tone.

"I don't think we have to jump, Xander! All the facts are adding up." Buffy argued.

"I know it looks that way, but we can't be sure until we talk to her about it." Xander decided firmly.

"I agree." Buffy admitted. "But if she doesn't come and talk to me by noon tomorrow I'm torturing her until she does talk!"

Xander rolled his eyes. "That's a very mature way to handle it Buff."

"Can someone please tell me what the hell is going on?" Dawn exclaimed, finally unable to control her curiosity any longer.

Buffy opened her mouth to explain but before she had a chance, a loud crash of broken glass followed by a terrifying scream erupted from upstairs. The three sprinted for Joy's room.

…………

Joy's first instinct when she had reached the solitude of her room was to lock her door, in order to prevent intrusion. She had managed to avoid Buffy for almost twelve hours, but sooner or later she would have to explain. Joy just wanted one night of peace first.

She had barely started to draw the water for her bath when a crash sounded from her bedroom window, accompanied by a person tumbling to the ground. Joy screamed when she recognized Jason, the young man from the Bronze earlier.

"You screwed with our plans, bitch!" Jason grumbled as he staggered to a leering, standing position. "And you will pay!"

Joy leapt away from him as he lunged at her, but she was still dizzy from the combination of drugs and terror and exhaustion and so she landed wearily and stumbled onto the bed. Jason leapt after her, landing on the bed astride her. He withdrew a knife and held it above her dangerously.

"Joy!" A voice shouted from the window.

The distraction was enough for Joy to slip away from Jason. She headed towards the window, gazing anxiously at Spike. "What are you doing here?"

"I've only ever wanted to protect you!" Spike admitted desperately. "I saw him and his friend lurking outside…"

"Where's the other one?" Joy demanded nervously.

"Down in the yard, unconscious." He shrugged. "I was just trying to keep you safe."

Jason had recovered his senses and grabbed Joy around the waist, wrapping his arm around her neck. Joy gasped for breath and took hold of his arm, pulled hard, and flipped him to the ground.

"And that's why you left me? To protect me?" Joy accused Spike as she straddled Jason and began to punch him hard, pounding his head into the thick carpet. "I'm not a baby Spike. I am more than capable of taking care of myself! I don't need to be coddled…" She emphasized each word with a hard punch.

"Joy, I wasn't trying to coddle you!" Spike insisted. "I was afraid of myself."

She briefly released her prisoner and he instantly crawled away from her, cowering in the corner of the room. "Why were you afraid of yourself?"

His eyes flashed with an emotion she couldn't recognize. "Because of your vision. I couldn't let myself hurt you and I was falling for you so quickly…I was afraid it could become dangerous for you…"

"I told you that I trusted you. You should have told me that you were afraid. We could have worked it out together."

"I needed to work it out alone. I'm sorry. But I knew that I needed to get away, and I knew you wouldn't agree with it." He gazed at her intently. "I never planned to stay away forever. I left so I could come back to you."

Before Joy had a chance to reply, Jason, who had been progressively recovering his nerve, had recovered his knife and lunged at Joy once again. Spike's expression warned her to move, but she didn't move far enough to avoid the knife as it grazed past her neck, cutting her just above her collarbone. When she moved, Jason lost his balance and tumbled out the window, crashing into Spike who was gracefully balanced on the slanted roof. He caught Jason by the neck of his shirt collar and let him dangle in the air for a few moments.

"Spike!" Joy warned.

Spike growled at Jason and let his face transform, flashing his fangs threateningly. "If you so much as think about her again, you will not wake up in the morning."

Jason nodded, clearly terrified. Spike lowered him over the roof to the nearby tree and Jason nearly slid to the ground before fleeing from the yard.

"I don't think he'll be bothering you again."

"Spike…" Joy hesitated, pressing her fingers over her bleeding neck. Before she had a chance to get the sentence out, her door burst open, wobbling on its damaged hinges.

"Joy!" Buffy gasped, seeing Spike at the window and blood seeping between Joy's fingers. The slayer flew to Joy's side and pulled her away from the window.

"We were so worried! We heard you scream, but we didn't know what to do because your door was locked…" Dawn explained in a rush. Her face was flushed and her eyes were red with worried tears.

Joy was too confused to reply. She had been so absorbed with the honest emotion that Spike had been revealing to her, and the abrupt appearance of the other three had left her disorganized.

"Joy, sweetie, are you okay?" Dawn frowned when her friend was silent. She glanced at her sister who instantly reacted.

"Get the hell out of here!" She shouted at Spike, moving briskly towards the window. "I didn't know if it was possible, but I see I was wrong. If you ever come near any of us again, I will finish you…"

"Buffy, what are you talking about?" Spike interrupted.

Joy frowned and moved towards Buffy. "You're overreacting Buffy."

Buffy shook her head. "You can't defend him anymore Joy. You have to accept him for what he is…" She returned her gaze to Spike. "You will never hurt her again."

Spike sighed and hung his head. "I didn't do anything. I can't even come in anymore, no doubt thanks to Red."

Buffy paused. "But, I don't understand. You would be able to figure out some way to get to her…like last night."

"Buffy, please leave him alone!" Joy whined.

"Sooner or later Joy, you'll realize that I'm only trying to protect you." Buffy insisted.

Joy shook her head. "So is he." She exposed her neck to Buffy. "I was cut by a knife."

"But, what about last night, and…"

"Spike, would you please come in." Joy invited him in without taking her eyes off of Buffy. Spike climbed through the window and awkwardly stood to the side of the two slayers. "Last night he saved my life." Joy explained. She reached out to him and he eagerly grasped her hand. "I was an idiot for letting myself doubt him."

The others in the room were too stunned to speak. Buffy watched as Joy pulled Spike closer to herself and he carefully inspected the cut on her neck.

"I'm sorry I couldn't stop him before he got to you." Spike apologized sincerely. He used the edge of his sleeve to wipe away the blood from her neck.

"You did enough." She smiled up at him. "I'm sorry for running away this morning."

"You were confused." Spike declared kindly.

"Umm, right…well, we'll be downstairs." Xander decided suddenly, pulling Dawn to the door.

Buffy followed reluctantly. "Please come downstairs and let me look at your wounds before bed…"

Joy nodded. "I promise." She smiled at the older slayer reassuringly. "Just give us a minute, okay?"

Buffy gave in and finally left the two alone.

"Joy, if you're still not sure…" Spike started slowly when Buffy had left.

"No," Joy shook her head and took his hands in hers. "I have never really doubted you. I think that I've always trusted you, even when I claimed not to. Sometimes my practical thoughts get in the way of how I really feel." She paused. "Does that make any sense?"

Spike nodded. "Yea, it makes plenty of sense, Gidget." Even though he agreed, his expression betrayed his confusion.

Joy smiled. "The point is, I trust you and I've missed you."

"I've missed you too." Spike agreed, grinning so genuinely it was almost uncharacteristic. "Now, I should probably let you get down to Buffy before she goes into bloody hysterics."

Joy nodded. "Can I see you tomorrow?"

"Of course, how about we go out and catch up? I'll pick you up after sunset." Spike suggested.

Joy looked skeptical.

"I promise I'll show this time." He gently pulled her into his arms. "I'm not going anywhere."


	44. Chapter Forty Four

Chapter Forty-Four: The Soulful Truth

"I don't know what to think, Angel." Joy confided as the two patrolled together. "He's been back in my life for two weeks and I still have no idea where he was all summer."

"Have you ever come right out and asked him?"

Joy shook her head. "I trust him completely."

"That doesn't mean you can't have natural curiosity." Angel reminded her. "Like, for instance, why am I here slaving away with you and not him?"

Joy frowned at Angel. "You volunteered to patrol with me, remember?" She shoved Angel aside as a vampire lunged at him from behind. She met the vampire with her fist and then proceeded to attack him with an alternating pattern of kicks and punches. Angel finally stepped in and staked the vampire easily.

"I know I wanted to come. I've been feeling slightly neglected since the boyfriend returned." Angel admitted a little sarcastically.

"Angel, I haven't meant to neglect you, but you know how excited I've been to have him back." Joy smiled. "He's been amazing. It's like he's trying to make up for all the time he was gone. Besides, if you're so annoyed at him for coming back, then why'd you let him move in with you?"

"He didn't have anywhere else to go since that demon took over his crypt." Angel shrugged. "And I could tell you wanted me to."

"And I really appreciate it." Joy smiled. "How about I come over after we finish here and cook my two favorite boys some dinner?"

"That's sweet Joy, but I thought Spike was going to meet you at the Bronze."

"Damn, I completely forgot." She glanced around the quiet cemetery. "I should probably go and meet him soon…"

Angel nodded. "Go ahead. I'll stay around here for a while longer."

"Why don't you come to the Bronze with us?" She paused. "Do you dance?"

"Only when forced…or very drunk." He grinned. "If you're lucky, you'll never have to witness such a catastrophe."

Joy smiled. "You could at least come and have a drink with us…"

"We really need to discuss your drinking habits, Joy."

"I don't have a habit. I just drink when we go dancing."

"You're seventeen!" He argued. "That is too young to be a social drinker."

"Yes sir." Joy mock-saluted.

"Alright, that's all the lecturing I've got in me for tonight. Get on over to the Bronze and I'll see you later."

"Bye Angel!" Joy smiled and waved at him as she sprinted off away from the cemetery and towards the Bronze.

……………

"So, I was thinking…"

"That's never a good sign." Spike joked, circling his arms tighter around his girlfriend's waist as they danced together slowly on the crowded dance floor at the Bronze. "What have you been thinking about, pet?" He leaned down and tried to kiss her but she moved her lips out of his reach.

"About Angel." Joy admitted.

"Alright, not exactly encouraging for me to know you've got another man in your thoughts." Spike growled.

"Relax. It's not like that." Joy reassured him. She slipped her hands around his neck and smiled up at him. "He's been feeling a little lonely I think since you came back to me."

"Oh?" Spike pretended to care for her sake but she could see that he didn't.

"Spike, I know the two of you have your eternal rivalries and whatnot, but Angel is very important to me. He is one of my best friends, and I don't like him feeling left out of my life just because my boyfriend is suddenly back in it." Joy explained.

"I don't understand what you're trying to say, Gidget." Spike told her.

"I just want to be able to keep him involved in my life."

Spike frowned. "I've never tried to keep him out of your life! Obviously I'm not a fan of the big brooder, but I'm not going to prevent him from being close to you. As much as I hate to admit it, Peaches cares about you and I know that he would never let anything happen to you." He smiled and kissed her forehead. "And that means something to me." He tried moving to her lips again, but she again pulled away.

"Good, then you won't mind helping me to get him more involved."

"Involved?" Spike hesitated. "How so?"

"In my life…which I suppose means our lives." She shrugged. "I need him to always feel wanted and welcome."

"I'll do my best, but no promises. You know how he tests me." Spike reminded her.

"Well, your best will be good enough for me."

"Can I get back to kissing my girlfriend yet?" Spike asked spitefully.

Joy smiled and tipped her chin up toward him. "Absolutely."

"Good." He captured her lips with his and kissed her passionately as they continued to sway to the music.

"Seriously, get a room!"

Joy and Spike broke apart as they heard Dawn beside them. "You have awfully bad timing lil' bit." Spike glared at her and Colin.

Dawn shrugged. "I actually think it's kind of perfect." She nodded over her shoulder towards the bar. "I was trying to save you from an inevitable lecture for your public display…"

Joy and Spike looked to where Dawn had indicated and noticed Buffy and Riley ordering drinks. "Thanks for the heads up Dawn." Joy rolled her eyes. "I swear she's stalking us just to be annoying." She told Spike who nodded in agreement.

"Or she's just really dying for a fight with me." He grinned.

"Spike…" Joy warned with a raised eyebrow.

"Only joking, pet!" He insisted. "Come on, let's give them what they want."

"What?" Joy frowned as he wrapped his arm around her waist and directed her towards the bar. Colin and Dawn followed them curiously.

"Mind if we join you?" Spike asked briefly before snatching the beer out of Riley's hand and guzzled it down.

"Actually…" Riley started to protest but Buffy shook her head and he backed down.

"Spike, can you try to behave for five minutes?" Buffy glared at him and ordered Riley another beer.

He shrugged. "It's not likely."

Joy pinched his side hard. "Be nice." She growled at him.

"Hey, what'd I do to you?" Spike frowned at her, rubbing his side as though it had actually hurt him.

"You're trying to start a fight. I think it's a habit with you." She took the bottle of beer from his hand and took a long drink.

"Joy, seriously!" Buffy rolled her eyes. "You're not old enough…"

Joy rolled her eyes. "Now you sound like Angel."

Spike took the drink back from her. "They do have a point though pet. How 'bout I order you a nice lemonade?"

Joy ignored him and turned her attention to Buffy. "So, what are you two doing here?"

"Having a drink." Buffy replied casually. "I kind of thought that was obvious."

Joy smirked. "Right, because the two of you always feel like coming to the Bronze on a Wednesday night to get a beer."

"Sometimes we do…" Buffy answered lamely.

"You're an awful liar Buff." Joy sighed. "If you're that desperate to spy on us, you could at least be honest about it."

"We're not spying!" Buffy insisted.

"Whatever." Joy shook her head. "I just wish you could give me some space. You know, show that you have some sort of trust in me to be able to take care of myself."

"I do trust you, Joy!" Buffy argued.

"Prove it!"

Buffy hesitated. "I don't know exactly what you want me to do…"

Joy thought for a minute then smiled. "Prove you trust me to take care of myself and be responsible for my own life, by giving me some space. Some time without you watching my every move."

"What exactly are you suggesting Joy?" Buffy asked her nervously.

"Go away." Joy stated simply.

"What?"

"I don't mean just right now, I mean go away for a while and give me a chance to take care of myself and Sunnydale." Joy smiled at the idea. "I'm sure you and Riley could use some alone time. So, go away for a while. Take a few days for a vacation."

Buffy frowned. "I don't think that's a very good idea…"

"Why not? You should know by now that I'm perfectly capable of patrolling alone, and I don't need a babysitter." Joy reminded her sharply.

Riley glanced at Buffy hopefully. "The kid has a point, Buffy!"

"I'm not a kid," Joy growled. "But thank you for being on my side."

"Let's go on vacation Buffy. It would be fun." Riley encouraged. "We can go to the beach."

Buffy smiled slightly. "It's been a while since I've been able to relax."

"See, it's exactly what the two of you need." Joy grinned.

Buffy waited another second and then finally nodded. "Fine. You win. Riley and I will leave town and go on vacation. You can be in charge of yourself and all slayer duties for three days."

Dawn grinned. "Nice! Let's have a party."

Buffy glared at her sister. "Joy, I expect you to actually be responsible and not give me reason to regret my decision in leaving you alone."

"I promise I will be on my best behavior!" Joy glanced sideways at Dawn. "And she will be too."

Spike grinned and wrapped his arms around Joy's stomach. "We will all be on our best behaviors. But now, we're going to dance." He kissed her ear and pulled her back towards the dance floor.

"You're not exactly helpful, you know." Joy scolded him.

"I do what I can." He smirked. "So, you'll have the slayer out of the house and soldier boy with her. How about working on getting rid of the witches and then maybe I can come over and spend the night…"

Joy placed her hand on his chest and pushed him back a little. "Spike, I know that I have made you wait for a long time and I really appreciate your patience, but…"

"But you still want more time?" Spike finished for her.

Joy nodded. "Sex just complicates things and I don't think we need any more complications right now."

"Of course not." Spike backed off quickly. "No worries, Gidget." He kissed her hairline and they resumed dancing.

"But I still want you to come over when they leave. Just to be with me." She smiled up at him and he nodded.

"If you want me to then you know I'll be there."

………………

"Hello? You here?" Spike called out as he let himself in the front door of the Summers' house the next night.

"Just a minute! I'll be right there!" Joy called down the stairs.

"Come to the kitchen, I have a surprise for you." Spike called back up to her as he crossed the entryway and entered the kitchen. He placed the two grocery bags he was carrying down on one of the counters and started unloading them.

Joy soon bounded down the back stairs, stopping when she saw him unpacking the food. "What's going on, Spike?"

"I am cooking you dinner." Spike announced proudly.

"Are you serious?" A slow grin spread across Joy's face as she started inspecting the groceries. "I didn't know you could cook!"

He shrugged. "There's a lot you don't know about me, Gidget." He started searching through the cupboards for cooking pans. "Now, you just go and make yourself comfortable while I take care of dinner."

Joy smiled. "I just think it's a bit unfair for you to be cooking for me when you don't even eat!"

"I'm not making it for me." He smiled at her. "It's for you. So, stop complaining and just let me enjoy spoiling you for one night, alright?"

Joy nodded. "Oh, I'm not complaining. It's not every night a sexy man makes me dinner…"

"Sexy, huh?" Spike raised an eyebrow.

"Yea, yea, soak it up." She retrieved a soda from the fridge and hoisted herself up on top of the counter to watch Spike while he began fixing the ingredients for the chicken pesto ravioli he had chosen to make. "So, after I enjoy the delicious food you're going to feed me, what else are we going to do tonight?"

"That's up to you." Spike told her.

"Well, patrolling, obviously." Joy decided. "And then maybe we can come back here and you can stay the night with me…" She corrected herself quickly. "Just to stay with me. That's all. Willow and Tara are staying out for the night and Dawn's going to be out late with Colin, so I'll be all alone, and that can get pretty boring."

"So, I'll spend the night with you, but strictly for company…" Spike repeated.

"Yes, just for company." Joy smiled. "Unless I for some reason change my mind later…" He looked at her hopefully. "But I wouldn't count on it." She sighed. "Do you hate me for making you wait?"

He opened a container of strawberries and held one up to her. "I am getting good at this whole patience thing. Really, a few years ago I never thought I'd be interested enough in someone to actually have a relationship, you know, no sex. But now…"

"But now?" Joy opened her mouth and he slipped the strawberry between her lips.

"It's just different now." He turned away from her. "When I'm with you I don't care about anything else. Being a part of your life just makes me so perfectly happy…"

Joy felt her lips turning up into an unstoppable smile. "Spike, why won't you look at me?"

He busied himself with the stove. "I'm not good at all this bloody emotional shit." He sighed. "I just needed to tell you."

"Tell me what exactly?" Joy asked with excited curiosity. "That you're happy with me?"

"Yea, but it's more than that. Being with you is perfect." He turned around to face her again and she saw something in his eyes that she'd never noticed before. Calling it a 'sparkle' was too cliché, but it really was. He was actually sparkling with delight or as he had said, a perfect happiness.

"It is perfect, isn't it?" Joy agreed. She stretched out her legs and locked her ankles around his waist and pulled him towards herself. "_We_ are perfect." He placed his hands on her hips and kissed her slowly.

He sniffed the air. "Okay…we're perfect but the food is burning!" He broke the kiss and pulled away from her, quickly returning his attention to the stove.

………………

After dinner, Spike left to run a quick errand, though he wouldn't tell her what it was, while she changed for patrolling. They planned to meet at the cemetery in thirty minutes. As she was heading down the kitchen stairs to leave by the back door, there was a knock on the front door. Curious, she hurried to answer it.

"Who the hell are you?" Joy asked immediately after opening the door and seeing the group of half a dozen young men decked out in very serious looking outfits of either all black or army-camo.

The man in front frowned at her and she noticed his arm flexing as he gripped something behind his back, which she assumed was a weapon of some sort. "Is this the Summers' house?"

Joy nodded slowly. "Who's asking?"

"I'm Graham, and we're looking for Riley Finn."

"Oh, I get it. You're all government boys, aren't you?" She grinned. "Cool. The outfits make sense now."

The agents seemed confused. "You know about Riley's position in the government?"

"Of course. I've been living here for almost a year." Joy shrugged. "Do you want to come in?"

The guys hesitated briefly but entered the house. "Is Riley here?"

"No, actually he's not." Joy told them. "It's my fault really. I persuaded him and Buffy to take a vacation for a few days." She shrugged. "They deserve it…you do know Buffy, don't you?" The men nodded. "I thought so. Anyway, I think they went to the beach."

"When do you expect them back?"

"Not for a few days. They only left this morning." Joy explained. "Is there anything I can help you with?" The men were silent but she could sense they were hiding something important. "Relax boys, you can trust me." She smiled. "I'm sure Riley's told you about me. I'm Joy Peters."

Comprehension seemed to dawn on a couple of the men. "You're the new slayer."

She nodded. "That's me!"

"You're young." Another man commented bluntly.

"That's a matter of opinion." She frowned. "Besides, age doesn't mean anything. I bet I could take all of you."

The guys seemed doubtful. "No offense, but you're kind of…well, small."

Joy laughed. "Don't worry, no offense taken. But just because I'm short, it doesn't mean I'm weak."

Graham nodded. "Don't underestimate her. You've all seen Buffy, haven't you? She's tiny but she could easily kick our asses."

"Anyway, I was just leaving to patrol, so is there anything you needed me to pass on to Riley and Buffy for you?" Joy asked them quickly, remembering that Spike was waiting for her.

The guys considered for a moment and then nodded. "You should probably know too. We aren't sure if you have been affected at all yet, but we wanted to give you all in Sunnydale a heads up."

"About what?" Joy asked.

"I'm sure Buffy and Riley filled you in on the Initiative."

Joy nodded. "I've heard bits and pieces."

"Unfortunately we have been recently learning of some malfunctions in some of our…operations."

"What kind of malfunctions?" Joy questioned.

"You were probably told about how we would modify the behaviors of demons and vampires by implanting a chip inside their brain to control their actions."

"Yea, I've heard."

"Well, recently these chips have been failing."

"Failing?" Joy started panicking.

"Yes. The chips have now become inactive." The agent informed her. "Completely. They are no longer functioning as we had intended them to. About two weeks ago we noticed that they have shut themselves off some how. "

Joy paused. "So you mean that none of the chips work? At all?" The men shook their heads. "Are you sure?"

"Positive. There have been outbreaks of violence all over from the demons who have been constrained for so long."

"Well…thanks for informing me…I'll, umm, I'll pass it on to them as soon as they get back." Joy told them, slightly dazed with the new information.

"Okay, well that was all. It was good to meet you." The agents nodded to her and headed back to the door.

"Yea, umm, good to meet you too." Joy waved them through the door and closed it quickly behind them. _They have to be making a mistake. All the chips couldn't be malfunctioning because that would mean that Spike…_She stopped herself suddenly, feeling an overwhelming dread fill her mind. Thinking about the implications of Spike's chip not working made her feel queasy. _It isn't possible. _She told herself. _They said the chips have been off for two weeks! All that time that Spike's been here, and we've been together…everything is perfect! Something like this can't be possible! _Her eyes filled with tears and she struggled into a jacket as she ran out the front door and started sprinting down the dark streets towards the cemetery. She resisted the urge to fall to her knees and sob pathetically, and instead cleared the traces of tears from her eyes and forced herself to remain calm until she knew for sure what was going on.

As she approached the edge of the cemetery, Joy heard the unmistakable grunts and kicks of a battle. She took a deep breath and moved around a tall marble crypt. Spike was in a clearing of low-headstone graves fighting with three vampires at once. She stood in the shadows of a branchy tree, watching the fight.

"Yea! How does that feel bastard?" Spike was shouting at one of the vampires that he had just kicked hard in the face.

Joy rolled her eyes at the verbal baiting. It was so typical of Spike. He couldn't just have a simple fight without tossing out a few sparring insults.

"You want to try and say that about my slayer again?" Spike was now viciously punching another one of the vampires, alternating between the face and the stomach. Joy frowned, curious about Spike's words.

"Look man, I'm just saying what I heard!" The vampire replied weekly, pathetically attempting to duck away from Spike's attacks. He wasn't successful, and Spike managed to flip him onto the ground where he then proceeded to lunge at the hopeless vampire, elbowing him hard in the chest.

"Well, next time you hear shit about my girl, it'd be best for you to correct the rumors." Spike punched the vampire in the face. "Actually, unfortunately for you, you're never going to hear anything again!" He pulled out a stake and dusted the vampire quickly.

The two others slowly started approaching Spike, their fangs flashing in the glow from the moonlight. Spike leapt to his feet and narrowed his eyes at them. "Either one of you have anything to say?"

"Well, what he said was true. The word has been getting around. The new slayer's a bit of a sleaze." One of the vampires smirked. "Not that it's much of a problem for me. If she's as easy as they say, I might actually have a shot at finally banging a slayer…I hear they're pretty good…you should know, right?"

Spike's face instantly turned fangy as he lunged at the vampire who was speaking and snapped his neck without a moment's hesitation. He turned to the final vampire with a scowl. "Any last words from you?" The vampire seemed to briefly consider, before turning and fleeing from the cemetery. Spike laughed. "That's right! Run home little boy!"

"Spike…" Joy finally stepped out of the shadows, with a slight smile on her face. Regardless of what the soldier boys had told her, she couldn't help feeling that Spike was fully on her side. It was impossible for him to be evil again. She knew that he cared for her completely, but still, she had to know the truth.

Spike turned to her, his face melting back to its human form instantly. "Joy…" He looked embarrassed. "How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough." Joy responded.

"Long enough?" Spike seemed nervous.

"Yea, long enough to see my guy sticking up for my honor." She grinned. "It was kind of nice."

"I don't like them talking trash about you…" Spike told her softly.

"And I appreciate that."

He reached his hands out to her but she instinctively pulled away. "What's bothering you Gidget?"

She slipped her hands up into the sleeves of her jacket and fiddled with the buttons nervously. "Spike, where did you go when you went away?"

Spike hesitated. "I told you, I just needed some time by myself, to figure things out."

Joy shook her head. "No bullshit Spike. I need to know the truth."

"Joy, I don't understand what's going on." Spike stepped back from her slightly. "Just a couple of hours ago we were fine. What's changed?"

Joy sucked in her breath, trying to figure out how to approach the subject. "I met some people tonight, just a minute ago."

"Who?"

"They were government guys…" She told him. "From the initiative. They were looking for Riley."

Spike cleared his throat. "Aah, the good old soldier boys. What'd they want?"

"Don't screw with me Spike." Joy glared at him. "You have been lying to me for too long."

"I don't see what this has to do with the initiative!" Spike argued.

Joy shook her head. "No more lies Spike. Don't you think you've hurt me enough?" She sighed. "Leaving me like you did I've managed to get over, but this…this is too much. This is serious and there are more consequences then you obviously are considering."

"There is obviously something you are mad at me for, but it would be really great if you'd fill me in." Spike frowned. "What did they tell you?"

"You are really something else." Joy shook her head. "Lying to my face like this? I mean, I've heard things about you from Buffy and Angel, but I never realized that you could be that sadistic. Keeping this from me for so long! What are you waiting for?" Joy lashed out at him, punching him hard in the jaw without thinking about it.

"Ow!" Spike exclaimed, stumbling away from her and glaring at her with sad eyes. "Was that really called for, Gidget?"

"Hit me."

"What?"

"Hit me Spike!" Joy shouted at him.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Spike shouted back.

"Hit me god-dammit." Joy punched him again.

"I'm not going to hit you Joy!" Spike insisted. "I think you need to just calm down and talk to me." He reached his hand out towards her but she lunged at him, attacking him viciously.

"Hit me now!"

Spike defended himself but refused to hit her. "Stop it Joy! You're being ridiculous!"

Joy's eyes were blurring with tears and she continued to attack him. "Just do it."

Hesitating only very briefly, Spike finally gave in and punched her hard in the face, expecting his head to explode in pain. The second he pulled his hand away from her, Joy stopped attacking him and waited for his reaction. He moved his hands to his head instinctively but when nothing happened he dropped his arm and stared at her in surprise.

"How does it feel to be able to hurt me, Spike?" Joy asked him coldly.

"Joy, what's happened?" Spike asked her tensely.

"As if you didn't know!" Joy accused bitterly.

"I didn't…I don't! What's going on?" Spike repeated.

For a minute she wanted to believe him. His reaction was so innocent; she didn't think it was possible for him to actually be guilty of hiding something like this from her and plotting against her for so long. He had been so perfect! She didn't think it was possible for him to be such a good actor.

"Spike," Her voice was low. "The initiative chips have been inactive for over two weeks."

"What?" Spike frowned. "That doesn't make any sense…"

"Stop pretending like you didn't know Spike!" Joy threatened. "What have you been planning? Why have you been leading me on for so long? If you want to hurt me so badly than just do it."

"Joy, I don't want to hurt you." Spike insisted. "I would never want to hurt you. I couldn't."

"I want to believe you." Joy told him sadly. "But I have to accept what you used to be and without that chip…it's what you are again."

"I'm not though!" Spike continued to fight with her. "You have to believe me."

"Why? Give me one reason to believe you? Tell me why I should trust anything you say?"

Spike hung his head. "Those three months that I was gone…" He paused and took a deep breath. "I wasn't just biding my time."

"What were you doing Spike?"

He looked up at her, locking his eyes with hers. "I was looking for something."

"For what?" Joy asked.

"Something that could help me prove myself to you, to gain your trust." He gazed at her deeply, sincerely. "The way that Angel is able to."

"Oh my god." Joy gasped as realization hit her. "Spike…"

He nodded slowly. "It wasn't easy, but I was determined and I finally found a way."

"How?" She shook her head. "Why?"

"The 'how' was long and difficult and painful, and I'd rather not describe the details to you." He shrugged. "It wasn't pleasant." She nodded her understanding. "As for the 'why'…" He glanced up at her and made sure she was listening clearly. "I had hoped it would be obvious by now." A slight smile tugged at his lips. "I love you Joy."

For a moment Joy felt as though she couldn't breathe. She had never realized how much she had wanted to hear that from him, but now that he had told her it was as though everything was finally falling into place. Everything finally made sense. It was perfect, just as it should be.

"You have to believe me Joy. I don't know what else to do to prove it to you…"

Joy cut him off, placing her hands on either side of his face. "You don't have anything left to prove to me. What you've already done…" She smiled and stood on tiptoes to kiss him quickly. "Nothing in this world could mean more to me."

The concern in his face faded and he circled his arms around her waist quickly, pulling her close to himself. "Are you sure?"

Joy nodded. "I've never been more sure of anything in my life." She kissed him again. "I love you!"

He grinned broadly and kissed her passionately. "Say it again."

"I love you!" She murmured with her lips pressed against his. "I love you." She slipped her arms around his neck and lifted herself up, wrapping her legs around his waist. "Your turn." She murmured, slowly kissing a trail from his lips down his chin and down to his collarbone.

"I love you desperately." He chuckled slightly as her lips tickled his neck. "You are the most amazing person I have ever known…" He touched her chin, leaning it up towards his face and kissed her nose. "And I love…" He kissed her lips and then each cheek. "Everything about you." Now it was his turn to make a trail of kisses down her neck.

"Spike…" She breathed heavily as she felt his hands sliding over her jacket, up her back.

"Yea?" He responded, equally breathy as her hands massaged through his short hair.

"You know how Angel's soul keeps him from getting too close to anyone?"

"Yea?" Spike continued kissing her.

"Is your soul going to keep us apart?"

Spike stopped kissing her for a moment and shook his head. "Peaches and I are different. He was cursed. His soul was given to him as a punishment. I went searching for mine. I had to earn it and it was given to me as a reward." He explained carefully. "The things I went through for my soul left me without consequences. I can't lose it."

"Really?" Joy's eyes brightened hopefully.

"Unless someone purposefully take it away from me, it's mine for good."

"Thank god!" Joy grinned and resumed kissing him fiercely. "Spike…"

"Yea?"

"I'm ready…"

"What?" He pulled his lips away from her skin momentarily and noticed the excited glint in her eyes. "Are you sure?"

Joy nodded eagerly. "I'm positive." She latched her lips on to his again, mumbling into the kiss. "I want you now!"

Spike didn't have to be told twice. He had already patiently waited for months and now she was finally ready. He instantly started removing her jacket, struggling to pull it off her arms. In order to assist the process, Joy unwrapped her legs from around him, dropped to the ground and slipped out of her jacket easily. Spike grinned at her anxious behavior as she moved her fingers to the buckle of his belt, working quickly to unfasten it.

"Are you sure this is the best place?" Spike asked with a laugh as Joy pressed her lips to his again.

"We're supposed to be patrolling…" She reminded him teasingly.

"Well, if you'd rather patrol…" Spike pulled away from her and started refastening his belt.

Joy stared at him for a moment then raised an eyebrow. "You know, maybe I was wrong. Maybe I'm not ready for this. I mean, if you don't really want to…I'm fine waiting…" She bent down to pick up her jacket but when she straightened up Spike was in front of her.

"Don't mess with my mind, tease!" Spike warned her, reaching out and taking hold of her hips. "I can't wait another minute." He resumed his trail of kisses down her neck and chest until he reached the neckline of her shirt. "This is getting in the way…"

She smirked and swiftly lifted the shirt over her head. "Is that better?"

"Much!" He resumed his kissing, letting his lips tickle over her skin lightly.

"Now you're teasing me!" She giggled from the tickles and pushed him backwards gently. He kept her close to his body as he moved backwards slowly, continually exploring her shoulders and chest and neck with his lips. She slid her hands beneath his shirt and let her nails scrape lightly over his perfectly toned stomach muscles. "Why are you still waiting?"

"I just want to enjoy this moment to the fullest!" He replied softly. "I want to memorize everything about you! I want to know every perfect inch of you!"

Joy smiled in perfect delight and pressed her lips against his cheek. "You don't have to worry about memorizing me. There are going to be plenty of more nights like this!" She kissed his partway-open mouth. "Many more perfect nights."

"I can't wait."

She pressed her body up against his and he stepped backwards unintentionally and before either of them could realize it, Spike had stepped over the edge of the wide-open hole of a deep empty grave. He fell backwards, pulling her down with him.

"Oh god…" Joy gasped as she realized where they were. "This is kind of creepy…" She glanced up at the sky, realizing that they had fallen almost three feet down into the ground. The dugout was long enough for them, almost three inches longer than Spike and almost wide enough for two people to lie side-by-side.

"Yea, but at least we're out of sight from any passing by night walkers." Spike grinned.

Joy laughed briefly. "Okay…I'm game if you are." Spike didn't bother to reply with words but instead began unfastening her pants. She wriggled her hips to help him get them off. "This is so weird!" She giggled as he succeeded with the pants and she began helping him out of his.

"We can stop if you're uncomfortable." Spike told her quietly.

Joy finished unfastening his pants and slid them off of him. "You can't stop me now!"


End file.
